Let's settle this once and for all

"Play cards as written" effectively means disregard all rules in favor of the actual words. Kind of like how relentless rats "breaks" the unique card limit rule

Again, where did you get that interpretation? Because this seems to be one of those situations where opinions are like assholes: everyone has one and I don't see why I should listen to yours.

Uh-huh. And I suppose when a card has 'Tap this: Thing happens', I can just tap it with my finger and have thing happen?

lolol just bring up an image of it on your phone and tap the phone, then it works because LOLUNHINGED

"Play cards as written"

Remember all the dumb questions people ask the first time they play magic?

With this Unhinged card in play, the answer to all those questions is just "yes"

If it's a card that is written "tap ~", then obviously, yes

Baked beans, the musical fruit, the more you eat, the more you toot!

I didn't think we'd ever find someone that was objectively wrong about how unhinged cards work but congrats guys, we did it.

You sound upset

L2 Judge from Indianapolis here, the answer according to my RC is "sure, why not?"

That's pretty much the entire point of Unglued and Unhinged cards you dunkass. Have you seen any of the other cards from these sets? Why do you think PLAY AT YOUR OWN RISK is written here?

markrosewater.tumblr.com/search/Secret lair
It only effects errata, not game rules.

Next Un-set when?

The eratta on Progenitus is that it has Protection from everything that something else has protection to. Without eratta, it would also have protection from things like Non-Targeting Spells.

That's not how the protection mechanic works. Un cards are weird but they are still functional you still have to follow the rules of the game.

> The eratta on Progenitus
What errata?

> Without eratta, it would also have protection from things like Non-Targeting Spells.

Progenitus *has* that, errata or no errata. Progenitus has protection from non-targeting spells, protection from targeting spells, protection from spells you cast without paying their mana cost, protection from sorceries, protection from instants, protection from colored spells, protection from colorless spells, and even protection from every card name individually (see pic).

However, having Protection from Wrath of God doesn't save a creature from being destroyed by WoG, because protection is not indestructibility. Protection prevents four specific things:
-Damage
-Enchant/equip
-Block
-Target
and WoG is none of these.

that's fucking retarded. OP is a fucking autist.

Creatures with Protection from White nonetheless die to Wrath of God, even though Wrath of God is white. They have done so since Magic was first printed, before there was any errata. They still do. R&D's Secret Lair is irrelevant to this.
> in b4 "what if I change wrath's color to green" sperglords
Creatures with Protection from Sorceries, likewise, die to Wrath of God, even though Wrath of God is a sorcery.
Creatures with Protection from Converted Mana Cost 4 die to Wrath of God, even though Wrath of God costs {2}{W}{W}.
Creatures with Protection from Spell Names Beginning With "W" die to Wrath of God, even though Wrath of God starts with "W".
Creatures with Protection From Cards First Printed Before Sixth Edition die to Wrath of God, even though Wrath of God was printed in Alpha.

Are you seeing the pattern here?

Are you 12 or retarded?

There is no wording, no rule, no sane interpretation of this where that makes any god damn sense.

>Un cards are weird but they are still functional you still have to follow the rules of the game.
And then you see that one card that causes you to lose your hand.

That's because "protection from everything" has a definition with regards to MTG rules. If the effect was taken literally that definition wouldn't apply.
In order to be functional, Secret Lair has to, of course, comply with the rules. But it's entertaining to take it at face value and consider the outcomes, I don't get why autists get their shit rustled when people do that.

Fuck you and fuck your cat.
>Note that this card doesn't change the rules of the _Magic_ game.

God forbid i ever play un games with any of you fags. Jesus..

Go damn, you are dumb.

Here's some examples of how any of this works.
Because that's not how any of this works.
markrosewater.tumblr.com/search/secret lair

God damn, you are dumb.

Here's some examples of how any of this works.
Because that's not how any of this works.
markrosewater.tumblr.com/search/secret lair

What's a "proper" example of how this card works

Like if something says "sac a creature" can i sac one of my opponent's creatures or something?

>Like if something says "sac a creature" can i sac one of my opponent's creatures or something?
No, you cannot.
>701.14a. To sacrifice a permanent, its controller moves it from the battlefield directly to its owner's graveyard. A player can't sacrifice something that isn't a permanent, or something that's a permanent he or she doesn't control. Sacrificing a permanent doesn't destroy it, so regeneration or other effects that replace destruction can't affect this action.

Most "proper" uses of the card involve erratas that happened alongside rules changes.
You could use an old-timey Lightning Bolt and target things that aren't creatures or players (which might be useful if they become creatures later, or something triggers when they're targetted).
You could feed Mana Sources and Interrupts in graveyards would feed your Tarmogoyf. But you would have to get them there with an effect or before you play R&D's Secret Lair (you can't cast the, since the rules can't handle casting those types).
You can get into all sorts of weird tribal shit. etc.

It's also relevant with misprints. Anthologies Mirri would be 2/2s instead of 2/3s, for instance.
Not that many misprints are purely cosmetic. "Blue" Hurricanes have Green costs, so they're still Green spells.

Another good point is keywords.
Things that check for keywords won't see "Attacking doesn't cause ~ to tap." as vigilance, etc.

Floral Spuzzem is a pretty famous combo.
It deadlocks the game without causing an infinite loop. This will end with you getting disqualified for repeated slow play, but still... combo works.

Only if Floral Spuzzem chooses it to.

You sound upset.

Yup. The only 'errata' I can find on Progenitus states:

“Protection from everything” means the following: Progenitus can’t be blocked, Progenitus can’t be enchanted or equipped, Progenitus can’t be the target of spells or abilities, and all damage that would be dealt to Progenitus is prevented.

Progenitus can still be affected by effects that don’t target it or deal damage to it (such as Day of Judgment).

So if we consider these, then Lair being in play means Progenitus is protected from non-targeting, non-damaging cards like Day of Judgment.