How does flirtation go in your games?

How does flirtation go in your games?

"I flirt with the shopkeep"

"Great she is or isn't into you"

Fucking Schrödinger's Cashiers.

Either very poorly, very awkwardly, or it doesn't happen.

I mean, we all have girlfriends, but some of these guys all act like 12 year old kissless virgins.

We have one PC who tries to use his seduction attempts to help whatever mission we are on.

That usually winds up with him nearly dead.

...

look, it's two talking pieces of shit

...

My whole life I've never seen any Scott pilgrim porn.
Thank god

user don't say that kind of stuff out loud, i am benevolent so i wont post any.

Our DM once tried to flirt with one of our players as an NPC barmaid.

We ignored it and moved on.

You obviously haven't looked. It's not like it's hard to find.

Was in skype with a girl who is going to be in my campaign tomorrow while she was in a DnD campaign.

she kept mentioning how she wouldn't mind being carried/taken away by the orcs that kept chasing her because "her character is into that"

should I be worried?

fucking orc fetishists

very

it doesn't, they rape and kill, or they marry. if they want to fap over a character they can do that shit when they get home, the group only needs to know about shit that can impact them or the story.

I bet shes a hambeast that schlicks to yaoi

I don't even want to know what was going on in her session. I feel like she joked about being into it with them as well since the remainder of the session she was being chased and/or captured by orcs.

I'll do you one better, I've managed to avoid seeing My Little Pony porn, and I visit Veeky Forums regularly.

Oh god I was curious and looked it up.

The first one was futa scat.

Why is that so popular.

how? I searched "mobius 1" on google images yesterday and got pony shit

I don't know. Someone linked some scientific presentation on YT about the "biological science" of why some dudes like girls with huge cocks. It's probably still there, and I still don't get why fuckers want giant cocks in shit covered skirts

Awkwardly, and this is actually an issue since a socially deprived player loves flirting with an elf npc. How can I be professional about this and narrate these situations without getting embarrassed?

If you're located on the good side of the alignment scale, then yes.

Also if you're lawful or true neutral.

Is he the kind of person that would actually understand and be cool if you just told him that you were kinda uncomfortable with having to roleplay that stuff, or are we using 'socially deprived' to mean total sperg?

>talking my issue with him

You know, while I'm quite thoughtful with my approaches, I had ignored this option completely until you pointed it out. God I'm an idiot, thanks senpai

If cute: play an orc.

If not cute: complain to DM.

Veeky Forums bans it outside of /mlp/ though, so that's not all that crazy.

Now, if you browsed DeviantArt a lot and avoided seeing it, that would be impressive.

Either very subtle if it involves plot/character development stuff, or over the top goofy bullshit that everyone can get a kick out of.

That just sounds like bad DMing
>character constantly tries perfectly normal social interaction
>is nearly always punished for it

I know a lot of teej's DMs learn what not to allow purely from memes instead of fun, but still, the knee jerk reactions you see to anything even resembling magical realm it's no-fun

"I flirt with the elf maiden."
"Okay, roll charisma."