What's the coolest thing one of your characters has ever done?

>Playing Hroth'gar, stupid human barbarian who loves a good fight
>Party is cornered by a giant worm thing
>I jump on it, thrust my two spears into it's head, and hold on for dear life
>The distraction gives them enough time to kill it

Killed ten zombies (read: half the encounter's force) with a single lightning arrow because AoEs are wonderful.

Well, last campaign my Commando one-shot a super-monster with a called shot through its eye.

Speaking of jumping on giant monsters

>on top of a tower fighting a dragon
>pull out my grappling hook
>land the hook on the dragon
>actually manage to climb my way onto its back and start riding it
>attempt to tame the dragon
>tell it I'll let it live if it'll be my mighty steed
>it's flying around trying to fling me off and get away from the party
>party manages to shoot it down
>as the dragon's body falls into a giant ravine, I jump off and just barely grab the ledge of a bridge
>party manages to pull me back up just before I fall to my death

Maybe more of a dumbass moment than a badass moment but still
Pretty good for a monk

I managed to kill a Barghest with a snowball.

I jumped on two giant monsters as a monk. Would have been more if our fighter hadn't thrown the McGuffin in a lake.

First one:
>Out at sea, looking for some relic
>Find some tower, last remains of a sunken city, poking ~90 feet out of the water
>As we approach, fucking Moby Dick attacks
>Sprint straight up the tower wall and dropkick that bastard

We lost our boat and captain, but it was still satisfying.

Other one being slamming a dragon into the wall of a ravine and riding it down.

Hi colin

:^}

Held up an entire army for several minutes.

it was a campaign finale, we had broken through enemy lines and had infiltrated some carverns the BBEG was operating out of.

We received word (via magic) that the enemy forces were retreating, pulling back to the caves.

While the rest of the party went on to face the BBEG, my fight stood valiant at a choke point of his choosing. The DM literally had me fight and endless amount of mooks because every turn I held them at bay was another turn that they would be delayed from entering the fight the rest of the party was doing.

felt pretty fucking metal at the time.

hey dude

Hi Colin :^))))))

okay wait is this just a repeat shitpost or are two of you just coincidentally in the same thread as me right now

Hm...probably the prison breakout.

>team goes through dimensional portal, ends up in what amounts to Cidnha Mine with aliens
>GM is basically letting us make our own plans for an escape
>what we eventually come up with is this: using the crystals they're mining (which have weird electrical properties), we build an IED of sorts and plant it by the doors
>start a riot, then when the guards come in, set off the electro-bomb

So here's the scene: this giant riot is in progress, with minotaur-lookalikes, worm-people, digitigrade multi-limbed aliens and more all beating on each other, the guards are opening the doors to come in and "pacify" things (stepping right into the trap)...and in the middle of it all, standing on top of a boulder, is one very annoyed Australian man, holding the detonator switch, and belting out the chorus to Johnny Cash's "San Quentin" at the top of his lungs. And then he hits the detonator.

>playing Call of Cthulhu
>character is the son of a wealthy family who ram away from home so he could pretent t be a shitty pirate
>first session, shit goes down in a cabaret
>party gets split
>head of the other half of the party blames the commotion on "some crazy man in a pirate outfit
>police everywhere looking for my character
So at this point, you can imagine I'm kind of angry, so now its time for revenge
>other party discovers cabaret manager is involved in yog sothothery, they make plans to investigate the next day
>dm turns to me, my time to shine
>Captain Manchild goes to a bar, convinces owner to "rent" it to him for the night
>pay extra for him to not be there
>rename the bar "The Salty Sand Rat"
>head back to cabaret, comvince all the women to come work at the bar for the night, willing to pay them double what the cabaret does
>go to manager, attempt to get him to "join" my crew, he refuses
>have my large german bouncer (one of two pcs unfortunate enough to be in my half of the party) knock out the manager and drag him to the bar
>swap clothes with cabaret manager and lock him in an office
>merry times are had at the bar until party decides to leave
>never paid cabaret girls for the night
>riots begin
>bar is burnt to the ground
>officials find a charred corpse in the wreckage garbed in pirate clothing
>police no longer on the look out for Captain Manchild and the other party no longer has a plan
>reintegrate party and assert my dominance as leader with evidence that was found in cabaret managers pockets
After that it was basically a game of who could fuck over who. The other party leader threw a brick at another pc and blamed it on me, I accidentally burned down a mansion, and dont even get me started on when my dm thought it would be okay to let me buy roman candles...

Accidentally seduced the king, because she was a mostly-human-looking tiefling with horns and he had a fetish for that. Then cockblocked him be cause she wasn't ready to lose her V-card. We also saved the world and had poignant personal moments but that's not that big a deal.

>Pinning someone stupidly powerful in Rifts
You'd be surprised how common that is.

One group I was in had a glitterboy pilot who was a complete and total asshole since while in his armor he was unreasonably powerful.
One of the other players (an earth warlock) got tired of it. After a combat, while the glitterboy was still anchored into the ground, the warlock caused the ground under the armor to open up, then closed it around the glitterboy after it fell in.
While the glitterboy does have some life-support systems and enough MDC to not get crushed to a pulp, it still effectively 'killed' the asshole character.

>horns
Who doesn't?

Went toe-to-toe with a drake and its underlings before the drake set off our explosives.

She was the only one left standing.

Duel wielded my nearly dead friend and a two handed longsword to fight a bunch of monsters. This was using DnD 5th edition? I think... I don't know it's been 8 years since i played the game. All i can say is i lost my two handed sword to a bad roll and was able to survive using just my buddy... It was a great time. Lots of laughs. Oh and the GM refuses to play with me again.

Pic related.

My character took a road roller and dropped it on the enemy, one-shotting him.

>built a coach with a balista on the back
>used it to ambush a green adult dragon
>ammo was a adamantium net, with hooks to catch on scales.
>had someone use heat metal
>proceed to own the living daylights out of dragon.
>dragon escapes
>mind controlls party member because then DM was a dipshit and cant into conditions
>fight him on the back of a dragon

>>eventually still kill dragon in reign-of-fire-style dive., do die though, get washed down river.

>DnD 5th edition
>8 years since

Home brew cyberpunk game.

Play mentally unstable hyper teenage girl. Pic related, like a cross between Harley quinn and that bitch from Future Diary. My goal as player was to creep out the rest of the party as much as possible, as they usually play very vanilla lawful good shit and let themselves on the back for how nice they are.

>BBEG is a corrupt law enforcement shit head. Is cyberpunk so he bends rules for personal gain, to the point where he can accuse anyone of assaulting a judge and sentencing then to death instantly, shooting them
>I dun give a shit. Party only takes me along because I'm a brilliant 'engineer' (read: makes home made explosives and rips cybernetics out of people, living or alive, to install cheaply for profit) and because I was an orphan
>Help out party by being sweet little girl who fixed and upgrades their firearms, along with anything hardware related, I play her creepy though in an insane, not edge lord way. Players suspicious
>Only made her an orphan to make party want to help and support her.
>mfw city is filled with millions of homeless kids but they only help me
>Party hacker finds out what I get up to behind their backs (the cyberware ripping etc) and leaves a police report in their servers.
>I get arrested and fucked up by police, my little hide out full of bombs and cool shit confiscated by law enforcement.
>Party finds out about all the illegal shit in my possession and disowns me for a while.
>BBEG led the investigation into my flat, burnt the place down afterwards because 'chaotic evil bbeg'
>My 'poor girl' hatches a plan.
>Immediately hand myself in to a rehab centre. Claim to the party I was on very bad drugs I was addicted to cause of being homeless and not knowing better.
>cry crocodile tears and smile sweetly for party.
D-dont worry guys. I'll be b-back with you soon!
>Party is proud of me.
Little do they know I found out that the wife of the bbeg was a raging alcoholic.

Cont.? Shenanigans incoming

>let themselves on the back
Don't you mean pat?

You're an asshole, by the way. I just want you to know.

But do continue.

>do some badass things because I can roll well
>attempt to feel happy
>party member gives me shit for being good
>says the rest of the party shouldn't even exist because I'm too OP
>demands I nerf myself
>DM attempts to nerf me but since it's an overall mechanic it makes another character in the party worse
>I have other options so I can completely evade the nerf
>no one is happy about my character
I feel like I should just do death rushes at everything until my character dies so I can make a new guy who just sucks so I won't get shit for it

Gonna cont anyways cause I'm bored.

>Start stealing little things like fuses, wires. Sneak out at night through the window as I'm pretty tiny and malnourished.
Worth mentioning that Dm supported the idea of me playing a creepy char to give the players a 'wake up call ' as he put it.
>Dm narrows eyes at me, points out that there's a security checkpoint at all the exits to the rehab centre. So there's no way any explosive or weapon or anything I make will make it out
>Give Dm shit eating grin "I know"
>My char was given sedative style drugs to try and calm her down because of her boundless energy. But I haven't been taking them.
>Meet BBEG's wife in rehab after two weeks, slowly befriend her over a month of sessions. Act like the daughter she never had with her husband.
>BBEG even visits wife now and again. I wave at him innocently every time.
>Party decides that I'm trying to 'turn evil' because chaotic neutral isn't a thing in their brains. All members voice their dislike to my character in a 'family visit'. She just shrugs and goes back to the jigsaw she was playing with.
>Players visibly disappointed in me. I just smile.
The time has come.
>Send a little message to the hacker claiming that I've got a bunch of evidence proving bbeg is evil and that I was 'undercover all along'. Tell him to speak to his wife, who had the evidence, in a visitation session at the rehab tomorrow.
>That night I smuggle in a nice bottle of strong as fuck alcohol, and put about 2 weeks worth of sedative pulls into it.
DM narrows eyes as he looks through the rest of my inventory. To his credit he doesn't react when he figures out what I'm doing. Players have no clue.
>Sneak into wife's room at night, wake her up.
>She utterly failed her addiction check and chugs it, then fails a constitution check and passed out immediately.
>mfw the alcohol probably knocked her out and I didn't need the pills.

Cont. incoming.

Sorry typing on my phone. Pat on the back yeah.
I'm an educating asshole :)))))

Gave the DM's Superman NPC a run for his money. Like, actual Superman, intended to stop villain PCs from going to far.

>played a dwarf ranger (lol)
>got really drunk at the inn
>go to sleep, so drunk i didnt even take off my armor before passing out
>wake up in the middle of the night to screams
>i'm suffering like two levels of exhaustion
>an assassin is trying to kill our cleric
>assassin is slain, cleric is KO'd but still alive
>random crossbow bolt flies through window and actually kills our cleric instantly
>go to window, assassin starts fleeing on the rooftops (he is on the building on the other side of the street)
>jump out of window, make successful acrobatics roll (at disadvantage due to exhaustion) to land on the street without hurting myself
>go to building assassin is on top of, make like three consecutive successful acrobatics rolls (again, at disadvantage) to successfully scale the building and reach the top
>get to top of building, assassin is trying to run and keep me off him by firing xbow bolts at me
>chase assassin to edge of building, engage in archer battle
>kill assassin, his body tumbles off the building and smacks into the cobblestone street

second most badass moment

>same character (dwarf ranger)
>try to gain access to orc chieftain's camp (trying to inform him of some political stuff)
>access denied
>manage to somehow successfully sneak over the wooden walls and into the camp
>making multiple stealth rolls as i pick my way through the tents and huts to the chieftain's tent (been in the village before, know my way around)
>orcs closing in on me, they still don't know i'm here but i'm close to being discovered
>make a distraction by letting loose the best chewbacca impression anyone has ever heard
>all the orcs are rushing to my location
>successfully sneak my way out of there and reach the chieftain's tent

cheeky lil cunt, that dwarf was

So, the wife is knocked out cold.
>Open up her stomach, build something cool out of assorted scrap, smuggled fuel, duct tape, fuses and a battery from the tv remote, hide it behind her guts. And sew her back up.
Arrived an hour before the party to do this with Dm, so they can enjoy my surprise. This was the hardest part, had a lot of rolls to do but just scraped through in keeping her alive.
>Sneak back to my cell. Trash everything I used and leave it outside the window of wifey.
>The time comes. The next morning.
>Wife feeling terrible, pale from blood loss last night. Staff help her through to visitation.
>Alarms all go off, visitation goes into lock down.
>Guards find the shiv I planted on her.
>Party confused as fuck. think I tried to get them assassinated via wifey. Sit in visitation awkwardly while widely screams and squirms. Too close to her
>I just grin in the most shit eating way.
>BBEG storms in, furious at wide for being drunk and having a weapon.
*click*-BOOOOOM
>my ied goes off. As the place was in lock down all windows are closed, the flames are trapped indoors, shrapnel everywhere.
>Party wipe, BBEG dead widely very dead.
Players furious at me, Dm laughing so hard he's crying. Probably just insta killed the bbeg despite rills because he enjoyed my plan too much.
>Mfw

>playing tieflings anti-paladin
>Party had to dispel magic orb in a mountain cathedral
>I told them I was going to guard the only way up
>This being a long ass staircase leading down and around the mountain
> So while my party did that, I saw the approaching cult of Orcus
>Forty guys, non minions
>Did my duty and held that fucking stairway
>Used some summon scrolls
>Used some potions
>Died once but my DM decided he loved my character enough so he declared my deity made a deal with the Raven queen to get me back
>This being asmodeus saying that if she didn't want to lose her life as well then she'd have to do it
>Stand back up and proceed to bring the wrath of asmodeus
> Orb gets dispelled and my party comes back out to see me chucking g burning bodies down the stairs

Engage two rock golems in a melee fight with a missile launcher.

Once stole a guy's belt while he was wearing it

Scared off a whole army of bandits by half orc barbarian chop off their leaders head in a single combat. Intimidation works

Different character but same player

>Playing female human rogue
>Gib some general in his own base and his personal guard chase me into the holding cells down the hallway
>Backed against a wall with 4 guards
>I use Blinding barrage and blind all but one guy
>Vault over the group and run into the adjacent cell
>One guy who can see me chases after me into the next room
>I rolled a high enough stealth to hide behind the open door
>Use sneak attack and kill him and then hide his body behind the door
>Guards run back down the hallway in search of me
>Sneak into hallway and use my crossbow with another sneak attack
>Action point for move action back into the first cell
>Two remaining guards enter the room
>I use a sneak attack on one guard and intimidate the other to back off
>Guard retreats out of room and runs down the hall
>My party enters the building for fear that I was caught
>Guard runs into the fighter
>The fighter grapples the guard and promises to let him leave if he can be helpful with giving us some info
>Crossbow bolt flies into him from the darkness
>I proclaim "the generals papers can tell us all we know. Besides I've got a reputation to maintain."
>I calmly lead the party to the generals desk with all the info we could want on it

Aww no one liked my story :((( Rip my teenage terrorist

So wait, you got the party, yourself and the BBEG killed?

Ehhhh. Well, ok.

>splitting open BBEG's wife and shoving explosives into her
>making her suffer and her husband feel angry at her as his last moments
Now I'm a horrible person so I love that aspect of the story, but I hate the killing the party aspect and I can imagine the part of the campaign where the players are sitting there, waiting to do their own shit
but the worst is imagining them trying to do their own shit, but then all of it doesn't matter because of gutplosion and getting insta killed

Pretended to be a cleric, started a cult, took over an abandoned fishing village, funded its construction by using cultists as drug and primitive firearm mules, and turned it into a powerful, sprawling cathedral city-state, with my "cleric" as its holy king.

It's good to be the king

My ninja Batman'd an orc, while trying to get him to be nice. We were in a giant fuck-off cave and I swooped down, grabbed him, and flew back up, so far he couldn't see the ground.

Aesthetically speaking, it might be the time my brick got her face frozen by an enemy energy projector, and she just batted her eyes through the entangle.

Recent session:

>Thri-Keen Khan is holding city hostage
>Demands tribute of half its wealth
>Khan is famous for fighting Purple Worms, which travel throughout the desert
>Has giant drums he uses to attract them
>Create a plan
>Party starts slave revolt in Khan's camp
>Slaves pound on drums according to instructions
>DM rolls, Purple Worm emerges from sand
>Khan has to fight it to prove he lives up to his reputation, climbs up onto it and starts stabbing it
>My Wizard: Hypnotic Pattern
>Khan and Worm fail saves, zone out in middle of battlefield
>Khan's Hobgoblin minions stab helpless Purple Worm, to help their leader
>Keikaku.jpg
>Purple Worm no longer incapacitated by Hypnotic Pattern
>Khan on its back still is
>Purple Worm eats Khan in front of his army
>Army retreats into the desert

Nah I lived, I wasn't in the visiting room and had fucked off long ago.

I should elaborate, death isn't permanent in this game, there's a clone system in place. You merely lose the memories you had since the lay time you updated the clone info. Effectively party lost a week of memory. Wife lost all memory of going into rehab (clone updated banned in there) no clue about bbeg.

I'm an asshole but I'm not anti fun. We ended up killing bbeg permanently after we 9/11'd the cloning facility and then sniped him

>clonning
yeah should've said that first

Either I really hype my own stories up in my own head or I just stuck at dramatic green texting. Ah well. I'm glad I wasn't universally hated, considering this is Veeky Forums

Woopsie :D

Also sorry for shit spelling, mobile and all that.

Made it to the third session. Only happened once.

Sided with the party barbarian, my character's blood-brother and eternal bro, in a combat challenge against my own goddess because to do what she was telling me to do would have been to betray all the oaths I swore to her in the first place.

She wasn't a goddess once that little mess was over, which made shit pretty interesting for me.

>God created clones of party to fight for his amusement
>God failed to copy my undead except one minions(playing a necromancer), so it was just the copies of the party(all level 10 so no laughing matter)
>Everyone spooked, worried about their copies(party consisted of antipaladin, crit magnet samurai((10-20 crit range)) and me the necromancer)
>After moving down the initiative order, I command my 60 foot tall Necrocraft to dispatch the copies
>It does
>by picking up and football spiking each copy into the ground repeatedly
>finished off the last two by throwing the 300 lb antipaladin copy into the unarmored samurai copy
>crits
>gore everywhere
>nothing left but blood of the samurai
>God had to take a moment as we wiped the floor with ourselves
>My necromancers entire being after the carnage

>Dark Heresy
>Playing a Sage
>Deamon incursion on planet we were on
>Space marines are fighting a greater Deamon while we watch
>Combat based party members are trying to think of a way to help, but to no avail
>I get bored and say "I dunno, I guess I'll tell the deamon a riddle And break it's mind or something?" And roll
>DM jokingly rolls for the deamon
>His face goes from laughing to distraught
>Natural 100
>"I guess... The deamon hesitates for just long enough for the space marine to finish him off. Fuck you."

We later told him that he didn't have to accept it and he could have just ignored it, but he agreed that it was a pretty cool moment.

Two moments come to mind.
>Savage Worlds Monster Hunter-style campaign.
>Yada yada Lich and Dragon fighting in ruined city, we fight both.
>Get my mits on the phylactery of the Lich, an amulet.
>Run up dragon's tail, across it's back, and front flip off of it's head, throwing the phylactery down it's throat just as it's about to breathe fire, thanks to three consecutively awesome acrobatics rolls.

>Another savage worlds campaign
>Be a goblin pro wrestler named Jek the Snek Gobberts
>Xenomorph ambushes party innawoods
>Drive it off with a Super Elbow Drop off a high branch.

Shame neither of those campaigns lasted longer than three sessions.

In an L5R game I once ended the line of Shinsei, who is basically Magic Jesus.

Some idiot let his last descendant, an 8 year old boy, get caught up in a huge peasant rebellion because he had a vaguely defined ability to inspire people to his cause. I was tasked with hunting him down, not that anyone knew who this kid was at that point.
So I tracked him to an isolated temple. The monks there tell me "Oh we've had this big outbreak of sickness, you can't come in there's so many sick peasants."
So I ride out of sight, wait till nightfall, then stealth into the place and find the kid almost immediately on the ground floor of a multi story library that I'm stealthing down.
There's this badass looking monk guarding the only door in. Now as I found out later this monk is supposed to confront the party and then use this insane tech to stun anyone they hit for 4 turns so as to prevent the PCs from killing them for long enough for the kid to get all upset and have a cry and yell "Please just stop all the violence!" (As if he hadn't been sending hundreds of peasants to their pointless deaths.) But as it turned out this guardian monk had zero ranks of investigation and thus had a 0% chance of beating my high stealth roll. So I just quietly walk down form the first floor, cruise up behind the mini-messiah and knife the little shit. Then I took his body upstairs so I could bag his head as proof. After that I just fucked off back to where I'd come from, mission complete.

And this is why you don't let messiah babies get involved with doomed to fail rebellions and then assign them a guard with the situational awareness of a beached jellyfish. Get completely assassinated.

He killed a man with a placebo spell.

> Be playing 3.5 with first-time GM
> Players are a whole bag of dicks with little experience of the game
> Invited because "hey, you play, maybe GM next?" Join second session
> Why not? What is everyone else?
> CE barbarian, NE rogue, NE sorceror
> Fuck it. I am become Mighty cleric of Hextor in guise of Pelor cleric seeking to clean up the city of crime
> Hire band of strong idiots -I mean, party of adventurers -to do some heavy lifting
> Pulp local gang lords and crime bosses
> take over entire business district bit by bit you corrupting GM's hero plot
> start protection racket. Pulp anyone that doesn't pay.
> forge documents of legitimate sales, etc
> begin building evil base of operations using "acquired" businesses as legit fronts
> set up supply lines with properly intimidated underground contacts
> create gambling den with combat arena
> ready to go big and take over town government
> stealth kill town hero paladin
> persuade the mayor that he should really keep us on his good side
> SUDDENLY, ORCS!
We all die in the siege because "fuck you guys, they're in the sewers too. No escaping."

Playing Shadowrun a few years back.
> Party is on a shitty boat trying to get out of the Gulf of Mexico
> Chased by an attack helicopter
>Wind and rain everywhere, normal senses hindered as fuck
> I'm playing an Elf version of Revolver Ocelot
> Load EX rounds and shoot at windshield
> "user, that is military grade shit, you 'd need like 100 shots to break it"
> We will fuckinh die in the time it takes to get that many shots off
> "Can I just concentrate my shots in one spot and make a hole?"
> Succeed and make one bullet sized hole in the windshield
> "OK, now what user?"
> "I aim for the hole I just made"
> flat wat across the table
> "You'll be taking a -12 penalty to your dice pool"
> That leaves me with 11 dice (because all my character does is fucking Gun)
> Blow edge for rerolls
> Get 5 net hits and smoke the pilot
> Watch the helio swerve into the gulf

And that is the story of how Mongoose soloed an attack helicopter

In Age of Rebellion my droid slid under a table, shot out two of the legs then kicked so that it landed on the people sat on the right hand side of the table, then turned to the people on the left hand side of the table and said "Looks like the tables have turned"

Sung a cover of "We will rock you"

Tacklestabbed a naga midair as it leapt for the group doctor's throat.

Electrocuted a river that he was in to kill the giant frogs attacking us. Over 300 damage with a cantrip.

Literally melted a dragon's face off, then sat down and watched the rest of the fight.

>2nd edition AD&D
>Playing young brash human paladin to the dwarven god of family
>Campaign coming close to the end
>Group just got done defeating a bunch of cultists and their barbarian allies.
>Look through treasures.
>One of the treastures turns out to be a Luck blade
>DM has no idea what he just gave us.
>Party wizard who identified it only trusted my character with the information.
>Me and the wizard come to a conclusion.
>My character sneaks away in the middle of the night with the sword, leaving all the other good gear I had for the party.
>We were on our way back to our home town since the cultists had attacked there and were using some portal to bring in a powerful demon.
>They go back to our town which like much of the land since the cultist attacks was corrupted and destroyed
>They go into the portal not knowing I wasn't to far behind.
>As they go in to fight the great evil (Which my character felt in his heart they could handle.) He used the blade of wish.
>He wished to purify all the land that the cultists had corrupted and to bring back all the people who had perished before there time in the wake of the cultists attacks.
>DM warns me (through my god) that such a feat would not only destroy the blade but me along with it.
> "Being a good paladin is not only about destroying evil. It's about bringing back the good which evil hath destroyed." My Paladin replied as he vanished in a shaft of Golden light.
>My comrades comeback from defeating the big bad to not only see our home purified of the blight, but everyone alive and well confused at what happened.
>The only thing left is a note at the base of the statue in the center of town.
>'Hey guys, fixed everything up while you were doing the real heroics. Had to go though, my Paladin training won't finish itself. Try to stay out of trouble while I'm gone.'

Me being a huge moralfag and all I think this is the coolest thing any of my characters has done.

My half-orc had golden wings that transformed into longswords for combat and when I dealt enough damage to kill the boss I essentially suckerpunched this demonic beast master flew high into the air and then pile drived him into the ground until all my half-orc held in his hands were his ankles.

From now paladin to another...well done! Pic very much related.

My paladin was about to give a pre-battle speech and converted the drow refugees to my god and lead them to the surface world.

Not me, but one of my players.

In a modern game where everyone was playing a holy knight, he smashed in through a window to rescue a girl from a werewolf. This happened in a church, and he crashed - in full armor - through one of those big stained-glass windows while wielding a flaming sword.

Even after she realized that he wasn't an angel, she more or less fell in love with him on the spot.

Righteous! Stay holy my colored cohort.

Turned a military complex into a crater with a large amount of explosives and a convenient snowmobile.

The church must've been pissed after breaking that window though

>Playing crappy homebrow rules light system back in highschool
>Me and the other player were just given two characters
>Turns out they were a cannibal farmer and his assistant (me)
>Spend the whole campaign going from a place to another doing random crap in a major city and the surrounding area
>At some point we find three creepy guys in hoods
>They want to conquer the city because reasons, and recruit us to help them
>We keep doing random shit for a while
>At some point during the random shit we find bottles of a highly flammable oil, and the cannibal learns fire magic
>We then help the hooded guys get four flying warships and a small army of undead
>They tells us to lead the fleet and invade the city
>We do so, and the city is ours
>After that, the creepy guys come in to take over the town and basically tell us to fuck off and leave or they will kill us (they were a lot more powerful than us)
>Me and the other player got pissed, but we sort of accept it because no one was taking the campaign too seriously
>We turn our backs, and I suddenly have a great idea
>We turn around and fling the oil vials at the guys, dousing them in oil (if we lost anyway, might as well spite as we do so)
>They stare at us, as if going "...why?"
>Cannibal then shoots fire at them, and they burn down to ashes
>And then I pissed at them
It was nothing but stupid from begining to end, but it was awesome

One of my friend bitchslapped an immortal Sith Lord and lived to tell the tale.

My airbending character in Anima managed to cut a wolf into 37 pieces in one attack and proceeded to eat every single one of them.

Killed a mountain with him inside of it and lived to tell the tale. Married the hottest dragonborn in town as the result too.

...

>Gained a reputation for exploding everything
>Every vehicle I've ever stolen has exploded or at the very least crashed (I've stolen about 5 swoop bikes and 2 sky car thingies (all exploded) and I crashed my new ship into a sand dune when I first stole it (it did not explode and then I fixed it. Still have it though so it might explode later))
>Literally every Jedi or Sith temple I've been in has exploded
>I've been in five of them
>Only one of those times was on purpose
>Only one of the other times was someone else's fault
>I've exploded three temples purely by accident.

On the bright side I spend basically all my money keeping my awesome fucking speeder awesome as fuck and that baby doesn't have a scratch on her.

Tried to choke a mimic with their own body, when that didn't work they climbed back out and broke its jaw wide open through brute strength.

Fuck me Colin

Back when I played 3.5

>Half-giant Hulking Hurler on a pirate crew
>Bring a bunch of busted carts and shit to throw
>Basically any given encounter ended with me sinking their ship with boulders or tossing our party over there and then throwing their captain into space, team rocket style

Bought my party time to escape.
>be on an island with two mind flayers using an artifact to control anyone in a hive mind who spend more than 24 hours on the island
>the ships we arrive on are already broken.
>find a boat big enough for all of us but need to push it to shore.
>one if the mind flayers and 15 ice pirates show up to destory the final boat and us.
>being a ranger who specialized in underdark and monstrosities as favored enemies a rush the flayer
>summoned my pet bear to help push the boat since everyone ran out of spells and did not rest before this encounter.
>fully prepared to die. Even had my personal belonging thron on the boat.
>killed the mond flayer and almost died in the process.
>only survoved because our tank. A gnome fighter ran and dragged me onto the boat.

Christ dude. Spell check.

safely landed India

I am way more interested in your webm

I curbstomped the Immortal King of the sun elves in his smug fucking face, dealing massive damage.

He then turned into fire and almost cooked the party, but god damn it was fucking awesome.

You sound really shitty to play with.

>Lead a humanoid army against an army of monsters of equal size but disproportionate strength not in our favor.
>I promised them that the bandits would not have their way with their homeland, pillaging, raping and the like I'm a rousing speech. Not today, today will triumph. Follow me.
>They did, they died down to the last man but so did the opposing force. >Then the leader of the other army approached. 8 CR higher than us according to my knowledge check, my character knows we should run, but I won't let their deaths be in vain, dude is not getting the princess.
>We fight him, I pull out all the crowd control, support and debuff stops. Finally kill him. He dies and explodes in a burst of positive energy. Party saves except for the dread necro demon that's been following us.
>The whole party lived (mostly), I kept my word, but at the cost of all of the lives of those who chose to follow me.

Got to second base with a sea monster woman

Well, tonight, I made an encounter take over an hour to ensure we would win, because I had the Sorcadin twin Shield of Faith onto my tank as I grappled the boss on the ground and punched it to death. Big giant armor golem just couldn't deal with a 20 strength fighter kicking him to the ground and pinning him every turn. So I spent like ten rounds punching the golem in the face with my bare hand.

Blew up a pirate ship.

mfw my name is actually Colin and im confused if this is one of my friends getting the piss taken out of him or this is a long circle jerk of colins.

I DM'd a game where the players played as the Underfolk, basically the goblins, gnolls, orcs, and drow that are your typical adventurer kibble.

The party hailed from an enormous cave city that was untouched by the surface world because it was so deep in the Earth. Their power source was a magical mushroom that was said to have been a gift from "the Eastern Lands". This power granted them magic and intelligence, allowing them to become an advanced, peaceful race of Underfolk.

Millenia pass, and the power source is running out. The party is the group of adventurers that are the first Underfolk to see the surface in millenia.

The Goblin became the party face, as the Fighter of the group who wanted to see something called "The Eastern Star Sky", which was basically just the stars on the Eastern Lands. The Drow was the Wizard drow slut who got the party out of bad situations, the Gnoll was the ranger who liked to try every single surface food there was , and the Orc was the skill monkey who had trouble fitting in civilized society due to his refusal to wear armor or clothing.

The party made there way across the land, surviving against adventurers trying to kill them as they were on their own quests, diving into empty, untouched dungeons only to fight off adventurers who were trying to loot it, and facing off against manners of monsters they didn't even know existed.

The adventure culminated to the point where a dragon was guarding the Power Mushroom that they were looking for on a mountain. Due to a string of 1s, most of the party was cowering behind cover and caves, wanting to go back home, save for the Goblin.
[cont]

Knowing that his comrades were scared, Goblin stood up against the Dragon, his shield sundered and with only his spear.

"I've climbed my way out of the dirt that feeds the humans farms. I have seen the things they call oceans and forests. I fought back against adventurers that wanted to send me back into the dirt. And I've scaled mountains higher than your precious little hill!

And I will see the stars in this sky tonight, unmolested by your fire. You may have wings, but I've already soared higher than you any dragon that has ever lived! You will never break my spirit!"

At this point, the party realized that the little Goblin amongst had intentionally stayed to draw the Dragon's attention to him. The Goblin fought bravely, but soon he was down to his knees by the Dragon's pure strength.

It was this moment that the party used every single tool and spell they had to launch a coordinated attack that crippled the dragon's wings and flight, rooted him to the ground, and essentially gave the Orc enough time to give him the helpless condition.

They coup-de-graced the Dragon sending him falling into the ocean below, and the storm clouds went away, revealing the night sky and the Eastern Stars.

"Rushak, look! Open your eyes, the Stars! We've done it! We'v-"

They turned around to only to find that their Goblin friend had passed away just as the moon appeared behind the clouds.

Mourning the loss of their friend, they resolved to bury him above the dragon's fall, on top of the mountain.

It was at the Drow's behest that they did not.

"There's no need to bury him. It's fine like this. His eyes are staring into the sky, and he can watch the stars he longed to see, forever. Don't take that away from him."

Instead, the Drow casted Flesh to Stone as the party laid the Goblin to rest on a flat surface, on the highest point of the Eastern Lands. They bid their brave comrade farewell, taking back the Power Mushroom with them to their homeland.

Became the co-leader of what was left of humanity after an apocalypse.

Well it wasn't really something he did, a dragon more or less forced him into the role, but it was a role he had.

Killed an giant ice elemental by running a broken pillar, casting shatter While doing an epic guitar solo, and landed in a power slide as the elemental crashed down behind me causing a gust of wind and glistening ice shards to blow through my long golden locks. The party applauded.

Also took over a tribe of goblins by assassinating the chief while under the influence of an invisibility potion and had the face of the party convince the rest of the goblins that a goblin did it with his divine power. And we ruled the goblin tribe as a shadow government slowly conquering other goblin tribes, hob goblin tribes, kobold tribes, and was on the way to conquer a orc tribe when we stopped. Turned the whole campaign onto an RTS.

Oh and I once killed a major boss in Iron kingdoms by killing his grave diggers (we was a necromancer) dressed up as the grave diggers, and rigged a shit ton of explosives to a weight sensor and delivers the corpses on a cart. The best part is we just had to leave the cart by the door. We killed the boss and we didn't even see the guy.... or we'll we did after we was reduced to mush.

>ad&d 12th level Druid Named Davy
>Fighting a dragon with my group
>Motherfucker is flying around in a huge chamber.
>Mage has exhausted all of his spells
>Assassin has run out of arrows
>Paladin can't reach the fucker and nearly dies absorbing a breath weapon
>Davy, what do you do
>Only one spell left
>Illusionary Tree
>"Why the fuck not"
>Cast illusionary Tree directly in front of the dragon mid flight
>Dragon fails roll as he's dodging
>overcompensates as he is maneuvering Slams head first into side of chamber and breaks his motherfucking neck
>I killed a dragon with a fake Tree
>Mfw