>the ship is a limited run prototype made by Ikea. It can be rebuilt with a set of Allen keys and a flat-blade screwdriver but every bit of writing on board is in Swedish. >the engine starter runs off an old 12 volt lead-acid car battery and will refuse to run if replaced by another, more modern, power source. >the APU is a single cylinder diesel generator in a corner of the crew common room. >the ship can be started without any external verification by pulling out the emergency transponder activation unit in the cockpit, turning upside down, re-inserting it and then pressing the big red button.
Moar >the grav-plating on the floor is a model notorious for its ability to lose calibration in under 20 minutes, giving you the wonderful experience of tripping over a perfectly level surface. >the taps have only two temperatures: frigid and scalding. The showers use aftermarket water heaters. >the landing gear is manually operated.
Leo Lewis
>the ship can be started without any external verification by pulling out the emergency transponder activation unit in the cockpit, turning upside down, re-inserting it and then pressing the big red button.
I didn't know Vauxhall made spaceships
>The ship's networked systems are all locked to a very specific timetable of updates, which occur all at the same time every week and shut the ship down completely for 20-45 minutes while they are installed. >The ship has an auxiliary data storage medium in a hard drive the size of a tire, which has been used as the primary medium for several years after the primary blew out. It squeaks so loudly when spinning that it can be heard through the walls. >The ship is fuel-inefficient as a result of gimballed engines being loose in their mountings, requiring constant minor course corrections when accelerating. The computer systems register this as a navigation fault, and thus all low-speed maneuvering must be done manually rather than automatically. >The ship's atmosphere generator was replaced with a far larger model years ago- unfortunately this has the side effect of creating an "air hammer" when it kicks on and forces a blast of cold wind through the compartments every few hours. Everyone's ears pop as this happens. >Five years ago a micrometeorite/piece of space trash punched through the outer hull and it's been stuck in the gap between the pressure hull and the outer hull ever since, rattling around when the ship is in atmosphere or otherwise violently maneuvers.
Luke Richardson
>Vauxhall Where I got the idea from.
Austin Barnes
>the ship is a cut-and-shut; two halves of different ships welded together to make a single new one. Unlike most, which are made of the front of one ship and the back of another, this one has the weld seam running from front to back. >the drive is a second-hand unit that's too large for the drive cavity on board. It's held in a frame of hastily assembled scaffolding. >none of the cockpit instruments match. >the main fuel valve is a hand operated butterfly valve in the floor of the forward crew lavatory.
Kevin Hernandez
A few more
>Due to a quirk in construction, the ejection system fires all cockpit crew down and out of the craft instead of up. As a result, ejection is not permitted when the craft is below a certain altitude. >The ship is so old that it was built in space and later retrofitted to function in atmosphere- the terminology is specific. It 'functions' in atmosphere, unbalanced, shaky, and barely stable. >Electrical issues cause a bubble of short-ranged wireless interference around the ship, forcing the crew to use a comm buoy on a long cable pulled behind the ship to receive or send transmissions. The buoy must be pulled in to accelerate to FTL or fly in atmosphere without losing it. >Thanks to a very top heavy design and dorsal armor, the ship must perform reentries and some atmospheric flight upside-down. The cockpit rotates to accommodate this, but everything else must be velcroed/strapped in place before the ship makes a landing.
Liam Myers
>Every single dial in the cockpit is an altimeter with a proper label/demarcations taped to its face, as altimeters were the cheapest dial available at the scrapper's. >No matter how much the galley is cleaned, it maintains a faint smell of cabbage thanks to outdated air filtration. >The trash ejection port does not seal properly, and will therefore refuse to fire unless someone is leaning on the door to hold it shut. >The cockpit has been rebuilt so many times that it is remarkably cramped, and requires a game of cockpit Twister to maneuver past all the machinery and jury-rigged equipment to find the pilot's seat.
Joseph Nguyen
> The ship has a 'cat'. At one point it was a cat, but as it aged more and more of it was replaced with cybernetics until there were no organic parts left. > Then the cybernetics were replaced/upgraded several times. > If it wants to sleep on your bed, you find somewhere else to sleep. > Attempts to leave the cat behind have failed. Some from the cat fighting attempts to kick it off the ship. Others failed when the cat somehow returned with new parts.
> On the upside, it will usually kill one or two enemies who are attempting to board the ship before it gets bored and goes to sleep.
Leo Adams
>At some point in the ship's past someone taped over the entire log before a certain date with a massive list of (tasty, but irrelevant) crock pot recipes. >The ship's identity transponder suffers from a malfunction that causes it to list itself as belonging to a capital ship of the stellar Navy. While very safe from pirates, the system defense in systems the ship visits is rarely amused. >There is no D Deck aboard the vessel. Measuring it from outside shows there ought to be, and there is space, but no plans exist showing the layout and the ship elevator and stairwells go straight to C to E deck, with E erroneously labeled as D. The crew refers to disposing or losing items as "D Decking" them. >At FTL, the systems experience "hiccups" that cause them to restore to previous states, alter current settings, or mistakenly identify themselves as existing hundreds of years in the future. Upon exiting FTL, the systems retain their last iteration, requiring manual correction.
Jackson Cooper
>>There is no D Deck aboard the vessel. Measuring it from outside shows there ought to be, and there is space, but no plans exist showing the layout and the ship elevator and stairwells go straight to C to E deck, with E erroneously labeled as D. The crew refers to disposing or losing items as "D Decking" them. This one just begs the question as to why nobody's just sliced a wall open to access deck D.
Gavin Jenkins
>The ship is equipped with an experimental active camouflage coating. It isn't much use on a spaceship, but the AI enjoys using it to draw animated nose art.
Colton Williams
bump
Levi Cook
>due to what the ship's AI swears is a "wiring error", the fire control systems won't function and the weapons won't fire unless suitably dramatic music is playing over the intercom >the AI prefers folk-y music, but isn't too picky so long as it's fitting
Brayden Perez
I thought I'd never see one of these again.
>The ship's centre of gravity has slightly shifted off-axis after one too many clandestine repair jobs. It now requires constant course correction while the main thrusters are firing. >Over the years, many of the ship's subsystems have been replaced with after-market parts designed for wildely different computing/hardware standards. There's a small server under the Engineer's desk that facilitates the inter-system navigation. >The engineer uses the reactor's coolant pipes to heat their moonshine still.
>Due to space issues, the hyperdrive was mounted sideways. Because of this, the ship will enter, travel through and exit hyperspace at 90 degrees to Port, often knocking everything off the shelves that isn't tied down >As a power saving feature, the inertial dampeners automatically shut down at speeds under mach 2 without warning >All external hull lights use old 20th century style incandescent bulbs that require frequent replacement >Using the oven in the mess hall has a 50% chance of blowing out the lights in the bathroom >The faucets produce only Hot and Warn water >The Computer Core requires a key fob as a security feature else it locks down. >The Fob has a range of 1 meter and eats through batteries at a rate of one per two weeks. >All the software on the computer is century old shareware, nagware, buggy cracked software and release candidate betas >The cargo loading crane has a 2 second delay on manual controls due to software. >The "Space Saver!" powerplant is a first generation and suffers predictable power outages that require the focusing lenses to be manually reset due to "subspace vibrations". Whatever that is. >Working on the ship requires special proprietary tools sold only by the manufacture, who has been out of business (because of this ship class) for 207 years. >As far as anyone can tell, the tools were never actually made and must be specially built as needed by the ship engineer >The Quarantine room's "Emergency Ejection" switch is a standard flip switch on the same panel as the light switch.
Henry Roberts
...
Ethan Thompson
>The doctor has to sexily straddle any patients in that cramped-ass medbay
David Brooks
>all the ships tech has been replaced with a more modern ship meaning it flies much better than it should and the manual controls are perfectly calibrated >however Japanese pronunciation of English must be used when speaking to the ship's A.I due to a localisation issue
Bentley Bell
>>The Quarantine room's "Emergency Ejection" switch is a standard flip switch on the same panel as the light switch. What manner of ship is this?!
Asher Gutierrez
>The faucets produce only Hot and Warn water are the faucets warning the water about us, or are they warning us about the water?
Pic related?
Noah Clark
>The AI requires that a small camel shaped nightlight always be illuminated in the bay housing the main computer core. If this nightlight ever goes out, the ship will immediately seek out the nearest star and remain in orbit around said star until the nightlight is repaired/plugged in again. >In order to effectively pilot the ship, the navigator must think in Russian.
Jonathan Thompson
>>In order to effectively pilot the ship, the navigator must think in Russian. This is from that movie when they steal that Russian warplane, isn't it? >>The AI requires that a small camel shaped nightlight always be illuminated in the bay housing the main computer core. If this nightlight ever goes out, the ship will immediately seek out the nearest star and remain in orbit around said star until the nightlight is repaired/plugged in again. >Will do so even if it is a Nova. This is why Abominable Intelligence is bad for you, children.
Michael Price
>This is from that movie when they steal that Russian warplane, isn't it? Indeed it is.
Noah White
But mind giving me the name of that movie? In english this time :^)
>The ship was an old navy salvage ship that was decomed and sold for scrap. It was bought and "retrofitted" into what it is now, consequently its the last of her class, and spare parts must be fabricated. >The engines work, but they weren't designed for speed or this light at 67% original mass. This means that she looses little time reaching max speed weighed down... Max speed is slow as shit. >the crew compartments were originally the housing for the salvage equipment, very spacious but thin cubicle type walls to seperate rooms, and the eternal smell of hydraulic fluids. >The coolant pipes run throughout the ship to save on heating costs, and heat the boiler, because of this the ship has two temperature settings: Outside temperature when off, and 80+° when on. >A soft patch is a temporary fix on a pipe until it gets fixed properly, once it gets painted over it becomes permanent, the chief DC has lost count where they all are.
Sorce: actual quirks on a ship I was on.
Ayden Davis
Some elevator problems I have seen IRL, would be good on a spaceship:
>The alignment sensor on the turbolift is partly blocked by the door when it is closed. Typical operation goes: turbolift arrives 6 inches above or below destination floor, door opens halfway, door closes, car moves to align with floor, doors open normally.
>No matter what your starting or destination deck, turbolift goes to deck 1 and opens doors before continuing on to destination.
>Turbolift can only remember one destination/call at a time. If you want to summon the car while someone else is using it you have to press your ear up to the door and listen for when it stops before you can use the "call" button.
This one probably goes without saying for all things mentioned in this an any other quirk thread, but: >All "quirky" systems will function normally and with no problems when the crew tries to demonstrate them for a mechanic.
Carter Green
>Outside temperature when off, and 80+° when on. >On a spaceship
Whelp, it's 80+ o' clock.
Aaron Cook
All of theses on one ship? Well that's a proper rustbucket for ya. What were you doing, cargo?
Joseph Jones
One ship Coast Guard, Alex Haley out of Kodiak AK. Loved every second of it
Wyatt Jones
It sounds... really cool, actually.
I wonder if space "coastguards" would be a thing? Patrolling the asteroid belts, scanning for distress calls.
Brody Brown
>I wonder if space "coastguards" would be a thing? Absolutely they would. They might go under different names depending on the status of the planet/system they are defending, but hell yes space people would have the exact same needs for "not quite the military, but still have some guns" and a rescue service as we have here on Earth.
Lincoln Ortiz
>Ship is a deep space vessel, with an alien hyperdrive. While thousands of times more efficient than a normal model, many years ago it has gotten out of tune. The most notable result is that the ship (not the contents) increases in size and mass by 1% every jump.
>Now, years later, the ship is the size of a small moon and fuel costs are starting to become a problem, even with the new drive. The crew currently lives in rooms carved into the excess silicon of the control chip for the main computer interface device. They can haul literally anything, provided it has no parts that must interface with anything else ever again. Every member of the crew has an ever-growing hoard of precious metals, attached to the ship somewhere,, inspired by the captain's lucky gold piece, soldered to the bulkhead and now weighing several thousand tonnes.
Jackson Bailey
>FTL requires no fuel, but needs a sapient being in the drive chamber to maintain connection with reality while in FTL. While this does no physical harm, it nearly always drives the being insane after witnessing the unreality of FTL. The same being can never power the drive more than once, requiring a new specimen each time.
