Hey its kobold thread 2:

Because inferior creatures with a superiority complex are amusing.

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Stop making me want to fuck the kobold.

The combination of small size and a deranged predilection for traps, mainly. Also they're kind of cute, for lizards.

Is that Back to The Future crazy scientist guy, Doctor who, and Rick/Morty (never knew which was which) scalied?

Never.

Yes, but because Ricky and Morty were originally based on Marty and Doc Brown, it can be hard to say who's who.

How dare you, kobolds were made for nose rubs.

kill yourself /utg/ tobycux(tm) neo-liberal faggot kike

what the fuck

you heard me

You wanted to fuck the kobold from the moment you opened this thread.

Your party will enter the Kobold's Den with certain preconceived notions about what Kobolds are and what they should expect from the dungeon. Use this knowledge to trick them - instead of death traps, they meet friendly merchants. Instead of swarm tactics, the Kobold's Sorcerers all stack buffs onto their greatest warrior and a boss fight ensues. Instead of being lead by a dragon, the party discovers that the lower levels of the dungeon are flooded, and the Kobolds are being controlled by an Aboleth.

>party enters Kobold cave
>kobolds are friendly, afford passage and a warm cave with bedding for free
>'free?'
>'you seriously think we'd try to charge you money, smoothskin? we're not stupid'
>party shrugs and sleeps one off in the cave
>all the males wake up sore, kobold bedding must be trash
>they grumble off on their quest looking for a proper inn
>they will never know the truth
>they will never know the kobolds have skilled alchemists
>they will never know the kobolds fill the cave with sleep gas every night to keep them sleeping like logs
>they will never know the kobolds take potions so that no matter who they breed with the result is another kobold
>then they proceed to surreptitiously lay with adventurers in the hopes of breeding strong offspring
>the only evidence is that males who sleep in their caves wake up sore and bruised from a night of bed-breaking scaliesex they will never know

Do the males also get pregnant? Please say yes!

Post more lewdbolds.

The best magical realm is a subtle magical realm. There can be no evidence!

Discounting the occasional alchemical mishap...

I think they meant the male kobolds.

Hipsome mpreg kobold boys? Yespls

go back to any time, jew

You mean LIKE THIS

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We need to go lewder

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How Lewd?

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Doc Brown, The Doctor, and Rick.

Doc Brown's the snake (that's his outfit from BttF 3, back in the old west), Rick is the one in the labcoat, and The Doctor is the one with the sonic screwdriver.

Give yourself over to absolute pleasure with Kobold Kompanions, servicing those with interests beyond the mundane for over 60 years. We offer all the services you could ever want, from a simple one on one rough and tumble to a whole tribal swarm of warmth and pleasure.

Perhaps a little roleplay is in your favor? Perhaps you wish to be the princess, kidnapped from her sterile court life by a rowdy bunch of tough and dangerous thieves and deflowered by their gentle, dexterous touch or be the warrior, come to clean out the warrens only to be captured by the clan chief to be used at his pleasure or perhaps turn the tables on him and dominate he and his concubines before the tribe and take his place.

Our pleasure administrators are open to many suggestions and have ideas of their own you may not yet considered. Why bother with boring, unclean brothels? Clerics on hand for accidental injuries, poisonings and treatment of sexual diseases. All Kobold Kompanions are 100% inspected and certified by paladins of the pleasure goddess. So come on over, we have such sights to show you.

>We have such sights to show you
We have eternity to know your flesh.

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Playing kobolds is awesome. They should have made an entire minis-based game about that. It could have been like a Kobolds Ate My Babies but with a ton more resources.

For anyone who didn't see at the end of last thread: pastebin.com/1Cq6m3ct

Fun!

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MORE KOBOLDS.

MORE

Reminder

GRONK

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Kobold boys a cute!

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It's this close enough?

>the box is a Mimic
>the lewdbold is a lure
>it gets the meat, she gets the loot

>She

I default my greentext characters to female.

Literally the same Kobold was posted a earlier with pretty damn clearly female genitalia.

You're garbage. So is this thread.

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For a second there, from the thumbnail I thought it was going to be Seiferen's kobold.
I am mildly disapointed

>Kobold boys a cute
>Kobold boys
>boys
>that image
...u wot?

Is there someone in this thread who can't understand gender dimorphism or something?

..you know I'm looking at this again after posting it, and all it needs is an album name.

Wonder what kobold music is like. They've got different voices at least, and different resources available. Bone flutes over wood perhaps.

there's a faggot ITT who is literally incapable of keeping it to himself and is 'correcting' people.

I still like this idea I had in one of these threads where kobolds (living in dense jungles) have figured out latex cultivation and rubber vulcanization. They use the rubber to make waterproof fabric, for their wagon wheels and whatever but most importantly for slingshots which hold a special place in their culture as the main instrument of war and hunting.

In open warfare they primarily use poison-soaked metal bullets where available, but rocks and baked clay are common in a pinch. Using these with hit-and-run tactics and natural skill for tree climbing and tunnel digging quickly turns life into a feverish nightmare for anyone trying to end their lucrative monopoly on rubber production by attempting to steel plants or seeds.

>latex

Why the fuck are you like this.

What? That's what the stuff you get from a rubber tree is called. Pic related: tapping of latex.

Not that user. Latex comes from an actual plant (although it might be synthetic these days, don't remember), and it's a useful waterproof elastic material, a sort of rubber.

Absolutely fucking disgusting.

Jesus fucking Christ, I hate this teenager-infested shithole of a website.

I hope you faggots, niggers, and trannies blow your fucking brains out.

Worthless scum.

I cannot wait for the Day of the Rope.

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>>latex
>Underfull \hbox (badness 10000)

thanks for the paste

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I've seen some bait

upboat X D

>Flutes
>Played by anything with a snoot

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Hey this is a safe space. Get your racist, transphobic and ageist ass out of here.

>the Day of the Rope
The day when /pol/'s pathetic delusion finally cracks and they hang themselves?

put me in the screencap too :-)

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>>>/tumblr/

>everyone who disagrees with me is bait

kill yourself idiot millennial neo-liberal /utg/ faggot kikes

Enough reacting to the bait, post more cute kobold boys

go back to /utg/ you french alaskan idiot underage homo nazi nigger

Damn you for making that joke before me, but thank you for making that joke.

Nah.

Okay.

>/pol/lack spergs all over
>leaves and everyone calls out his b8
>gets super buttblasted and tries to spam some more
Holy Keksplosion Batman!
Also, gonna post some non cute/lewd kobold art now

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>everyone who disagrees with me is /pol/

>using four /v/ memes in one post

kill yourself

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>EVERYONE WHO DISAGREES WITH ME IS /pol/

>NO YOU EVERYONE WHO DISAGREE WITH ME ARE TUMBLR

must love internet politics

MUST love internet politics

Please

Dude, This is my first post in the thread. Also what do you mean by "everyone" when its only that one user srieking about his "Day of the Rope?

Also
>four /v/ memes
The only one I see is Kek, and maybe the batman joke. "b8" is common Veeky Forums vernacular, as is buttblasted and other derivatives of "butthurt", as is the term "sperg"
What's wrong faggot, this your first time on any Veeky Forums?
Maybe you should test that rope you love so much on yourself.

>internet americans
I actually know more mexicans, fins, and assorted eastern euros who do that shit than americans.

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Now you're just spamming meme words without any proper context or understanding of their usage. You've spouted more /v/ memes that I have so far, have provided nothing of value to the thread, and you're just using words that have no sensible application, and in doing so have made yourself the biggest hypocrite I've seen on Veeky Forums since the days of virt.
How does it feel to be as awful as /b/?

Francis E. Dec get off the internet.

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I have no clue what half of what you spouted even means. Stop speaking in memes for christ sake.