Dungeon Life Quest (DLQ) 89 - Fuck Sleep, Acquire Undeath Edition

How about a cute slice-of-life bit with Jack and Cuckoo, constantly being interrupted by cock-blocking villains?

Though mainly I just adore cute and funny with a side of lewd, so I might not be the best person to listen to if you're looking for something to test mechanics.

> spoiler
Degenerate slime, I bet you even enjoy hand-holding

not the same guy, but you are correct.
Yessss, tickle my fetish. Maybe not the villains but why not, fuck in front of them.

This.

As a matter of fact, I do!

>Animate the dead officer.

>Animate the dead officer
SKELETONS

Lich Bump.

Enemy necromancer, it is still a thing.

and what threat does this enemy necromancer pose to our zombie?

Identifying our asses being there like a giant fucking flair.

flare*

What, you mean like our death bottle, other minions, and THE ARMY WE WERE ON OUR WAY TO MAKE would? How the fuck is having one extra skelly on hand when we go to sack the stable going to make the difference between stealth and detection? Hell, we've got the boar with us.

Dude we already raised the lizard, and if you're worried about the death sense then both the dead lizard and dead officer already triggered that shit

We JUST DISCUSSED raising human zombies with out lovers, you dolts. They don't like it.

>Leave him the fuck dead.

I'm fucking alive. Dishes, caffeine, then will write.

I'ma start the side story thread today too.

No, we discussed raising human bodies as long-term minions, and only Nate objected.

This guy isn't a minion, he's a meat(bone)shield. We're not going to keep any of these things around, we're just going to throw them at our immediate problems until one or the other is gone.

Called, tallying, writing.

You tap Eric on the shoulder. "How common is that?" you ask, pointing a thumb at the dead officer.

"More than you'd think. Give people nothing left to lose and you get a hell of a response," the teamster says with a shrug.

"Alright." You drag the body deeper into the grass and check it over for supplies. You're rewarded; there's provisions for a pair of field potions on the corpse, which you take, along with the man's signalca.

You feel a faint ripple of death as River reanimates the lizard.

"Fetch, take Vim, Vigor, and the boar and circle through the grass," you tell your familiar. "Try not to be spotted.

"Yes, my queen," your small knight answers. He flits up to the boar's back; your undead hands follow him, and the four vanish into the tall grasses.

You, Nate, and Amy pile into the back of the wagon and nestle in amongst the newly-replaced supplies, leaning with hunched shoulders and resigned looks.

"Here we go," River warns, before she snaps the reigns.

Fetch's earlier admonishment bounces around in your head, louder when Nathan gives you a concerned look.

"Were you thinking about animating that man?" Nate asks, after a minute.

"Yeah," you answer, honestly. "It'd provide more legitimacy to the disguise, from a distance. Decided against it, though."

"Any particular reason?"

"At least in part to conserve my energy. Mostly, though, we have to live with the folks we rescue. I don't need them to think I'm something like the Lush."

> Bring up the Broken Jaw
> Pass the time quietly
> Ask Nate and Amy what's been on their minds lately

> Forgot my image

FUCK

> Bring up the Broken Jaw

>pass the time quietly and ask Nate and Amy what's been on their minds lately.
These sound the same already, why split them? Also ask the guard with us if he knew anyone from the Broken Jaw, might as well give him some info about whats been going on outside.

The middle option is essentially 'time skip me to the next scene Vox'.

Ah, nevermind then.

>> Bring up the Broken Jaw

> Ask Nate and Amy what's been on their minds lately

> Ask Nate and Amy what's been on their minds lately

The Broken Jaw should be discussed eventually, but not when you might need to suddenly stop talking and kill more people. Amy might have some input on the Harpies to hear about as well.

I'm about to be running my PF game so I'ma leave this vote open rather than take time away from my players to try and update.

>> Ask Nate and Amy what's been on their minds lately

> Ask Nate and Amy what's been on their minds lately

Bumpage.

>> Ask Nate and Amy what's been on their minds lately

Bump

Thank you for your patience. Called, writing.

Please skeleslut, you don't need to apologize to us about your midnight proclivities. Though I have to ask, does being a bone-whore pay well? It must be hard to find necrophiliacs who aren't already in prison or under a watch list.

Not to sound incredibly vulgar or lewd, but I'd totally hold hands with you while watching the sun set. Then maybe play your ribcage for kicks.

How do you deal with creative blocks, lich? I want to get back to doing my thing (not that one writer-user that wanted to do stuff about the Harrow, though that's still a great idea), but it's been tough, especially with such a busy work schedule.

I wish I was a madman like you.

"So...what have you guys been up to lately?" you ask, at last. "I know I've been a little bedridden and all."

"I went up to Glen for awhile," Amy admits. "Had a nice talk with Harry and Mrs. Applegrove and Brooks, about my intentions and all for everything."

"Wait, did you -" Nate begins.

Amy reaches over and ruffles his hair. "Did! And they said yes, even if they thought it was a little silly."

Nathan blushes, gratefully.

"You don't need to do that with my family," you tell Amy. "...I mean, maybe with River but I'm pretty sure she already likes you two."

"Wait, you don't?" Nathan asks.

"We learned awhile back that trying to tell our kids they can't marry someone only makes them marry the person faster," you admit, shrugging. "Why, did you - you did."

"It'straditional," Nathan mutters.

"That's sweet as hell," you coo. "I really wish I could hug you right now."

"I've been talking with my mother too," Nathan admits. "She's been having a rough time, but Victoria says she's been getting better. Hasn't forgotten how to fight, she just needs to relax and let her body do what she already taught it to do."

"What do you talk about?" you ask.

"My life, mostly. Everything she missed. We talk about hers sometimes but she always wants to know about me." Nate looks down at the wagon floor. "Asked about my father. Her answer was kinda funny, y'know? Told me she was a happy soldier back then, had a boy in every town she went through, couldn't tell me which one was my father at swordpoint."

"You had Harry," Amy says quietly.

"Definitely," Nate agrees. "I...I dunno what to think or feel about it, Bri. About /her/. I keep wanting to shake her and ask why she couldn't have been there for me herself. Why she had to /leave/. Why she had to...to give up on /hope/."

> People lose their way sometimes, Nate
> Love, maybe the question you should ask is what you /want/.
> Go for it. You deserve answers
> Write-in?

youtube.com/watch?v=MCZy72HpRKw

Walks or exercise can help (I trend towards walks because I'm broke), in addition to making sure I'm either rested or flirting with ODing on caffeine. Taking a break to write or make something else to get your mind outta gear and then back in can help too. Write with music (try deliberately clashing music sometimes - I wrote a character in an RP for the longest time by putting on love songs during fights and fight songs during quiet moments).

...

>Write In:
>You say that like it's an unusual thing. Believe me, I've wanted to shake my parents and yell 'why' at the top of my lungs, but it usually doesn't work out too well, because my hands keep passing through them.
>But seriou, Nate, it's okay to ask why. Just be prepared to get answers that make no sense right now. People lose their way, or have strange notions, or sometimes we're just....not ready to understand.

Fucking saved.

I gotta hit bed y'all. Votes remain open.

Questions, comments, discussion, feedback, and criticisms remain welcome and appreciated.

Thank you all for reading and participating!

...

Huh. I had pegged Nathan's dad as the start of Natalia's downward decline (y'know, desperately trying to save or protect the people she cared about when she Saw things coming). This way though, it sounds more like Nathan was just the result of someone living their life. Happy. Innocent, in a way.
>People lose their way sometimes.

Also, the constant visions probably meant that she was always a little..off. Just a thing with seers and oracles man. A normal life is never really in the cards for them.

>"This is something you deserve to know, but you have to be careful with these kinds of thing because neither of you may like the answer."

This

>> Love, maybe the question you should ask is what you /want/.
Nate is a dweller, a dweller upon the past.
His mom was obessed with the future.
Together, they're TEMPORAL CONVERSATIONISTS.
... who really need to talk about the present that leads to a decision about the future; they wont get that stuck in the past.
Not like their past is .... relevant, anymore.

> People lose their way sometimes, Nate

Bump.

I'm alive. Gonna call and write in an hour or so.

>> People lose their way sometimes, Nate

Kek

Thank you for your patience folks. Gonna call and write after this match.

And CALLED, WRITING.

WOOOOOOOO! ALL HAIL THE LICH KING VOXTHAS!

You sigh, sympathetically, and lean forward to take Nate's hand. He squeezes yours gratefully. "Nate...you know by now that she regrets everything," you murmur. "People lose their way sometimes. And when those people have great power, or great vision, it leads to a lot of other people getting hurt. Aunt Carol was like that."

"I...I guess," Nathan says, with a long sigh. "I don't want her out of my life now that she's back. It just...there's a lot of things left over."

"Duh," Amy murmurs. "For her too. She sort of expected you to assist her suicide, Nate. Then you up and let her live and I don't think she had a plan for that."

Nate nods, and frowns. "Maybe being useful will help her," he says, hopefully. "And I can spend more time with her when...well, when all of this is done."

"That's the spirit. You don't lose anything by giving her a chance," you agree.

There is a thump on the wooden roof of the wagon.

"Declare yourselves," a voice - male, and imperious - demands from the roof of the wagon.

> Let Eric and River handle it
> Jump out and fight

>Let Eric and River handle it
Not the distress thump.

>> Let Eric and River handle it

>> Let Eric and River handle it

Tell Fetch to be prepared for battle

Domo got y'all another present: wildwestscifi.net/nsfw/16200-dungeon-lewd-quest-anatomy-practice-with-bri-and-nate

Love it! Good job Domo!

>Let Eric and River handle it.
No need to blow cover just yet.

God damn, I like it, but am reminded of my own empty existence. Saved either way.

Aight, I'ma snag some booze, then call and write.

Called, writing.

You and everyone in the back of the wagon go very, quiet.

"Eric the Teamster," your captive declares. "It's about time you showed up, you useless chicken."

"The rest of this wagon's escort got taken out," River snaps. "You're lucky I was coming in."

"And who are /you/?" the male voice asks.

"River the South-Hand, necromancer for hire. The Lush /is/ still hiring, yes?" River asks. "After we got cleared out of the Lichyard I've been fleeing down the Dungeon ever since, just ahead of that whore and her fucktoys. If I need to keep going, you'd best tell me now."

There's a shuffling on the roof, and the scrape of talons against wood. "...He /is/ hiring," the harpy concedes. "Teamster, where are you going?"

"To the Pens to deliver these mushrooms," Eric says impatiently. "And pick up a new fucking escort. You notice the lizard is as damn zombie?"

"An unstable zombie, at that," River adds. "It's falling apart."

Shuffle. Scrape. You hold your breath.

"...Be on your way," the harpy says at last. "I'll inform the Lush of your interest. He'll be expecting you after the supplies are delivered."

The wood scrapes as the harpy takes off. After a moment, River snaps the reins again.

"Well fuck," Amy mutters.

"We'll burn that bridge later," you tell her.

You pass the rest of the journey in anxious silence, until the cart slows to a stop, and River thumps the side. You and your lovers climb out of the back of the wagon and take a look at the Lizard Pens.

The pens themselves take up the majority of the camp; there are ten in all, each holding approximately five of the beasts by rough count, but with definite room for more. You can see storage for their feed, as well as rough but serviceable housing for the soldiers.

"Where the hell did he dig up all of these men?" River mutters. "More than a hundred that I can see, not more than a hundred and fifty. He's modeled his operation after older forces thus far, so let's call it a century and a half of soldiers, plus the lizards."

"That might be a bit of a problem," you admit. "Between you and Tina we can probably burn them out, but that means no supplies and no stealth. The Lush will /definitely/ know we're here."

"Not to mention killing the runners," Nathan points out. "And fire is both a painful and very indiscriminate way to die."

"I could try to sing but once the folks outside earshot figure it out we've got a problem," Amy offers. "Or...I dunno, take Fetch and the hands, try to sneak past the sentries and just start murdering officers..."

You frown, but a certain amount of dead people is not going to be avoidable for this, is it?

Damn.

"I've got a ballsy idea," Eric speaks up. "But if we fuck it up, we're in it deep."

"I'm listening," you tell him.

"Me an' the knife-ear go in with the supplies. Tell them we got attacked by the dark necromancer on the way to the Mushroom Farm and ran away. Mushroom Farm needs these supplies, so they give us twenty men and we ride off that way. We /also/ tell them that the necromancer was heading for the Seedhouse, and the harpy wants a detail to reinforce it. That'll pull another fifty, to fight off yer zombie army. That's seventy men outta that camp. You and the others hide until they're outta earshot, then overrun the place with that boar o' yers."

...Huh. That might work, and you can muffle the sounds of battle with darkness...

> Burn the place
> Assassinate (You are Sir Fetch the Nightfeather)
> Go with Eric's plan
> Write-in?

>write-in
Pic related

> Assassinate (You are Sir Fetch the Nightfeather)

How close are we to wherever we're going? How far away is the Lush? How fast do harpies fly? If the Lush is informed fast enough, he be able to send warning or troops there.

Harpies are definitely a risk. The closest major landmark is maybe twenty minutes away by march, call it another fifteen for them to scramble for their weapons and get into formation, but harpies can arrive /now/. However, you haven't /seen/ many harpies either. Remember, this is /part/ of /one/ murder. They may not engage.

Those zombie bats, on the other hand...

We're a necromancer. What do we know about the bats? Can they send information instantly? The Lush probably keeps is sentry-necromancer close to him.

They likely cannot, but their behavior can form signals.

...How much do we know about lizard-mounts? Is there any chance of making them stampede?

Not much. They may be native to the Dungeon.

> Assassinate (You are Sir Fetch the Nightfeather)
> Go with Eric's plan
That way we have less guards to dodge and if River's up for it, tell the guards with you that some tracks are found headed for the New Hell entrance. Get the guard to check them out and hopefully we can ambush them. We can whittle the Lush's troops down to a more managable state.

> Assassinate and sabotage by covertly destroying structures. (You are Sir Fetch the Nightfeather)
>Search for communication devices like the bells.
>Keep an eye out for messengers and scouts, including aerial ones.
>Prepare to set things on fire.
> Go with Eric's plan.

>Assassinate (You are Sir Fetch the Nightfeather)
>Write-in?
>"Make them understand exactly why they are deadmen walking."
For every mark, every stain, and every act of cruelty, death comes!

I don't suppose that we brought any explosives? Do any of us know spells that can be used similarly?

Guys, what's with the multi-voting? C'mon here, don't do this to me.

They're too used to XS.

>Use Eric's plan.

It could really, really suck. But damned if it isn't a fairly good plan.

> Assassinate (You are Sir Fetch the Nightfeather)

Probably has the least death out of all of the options. Eric's plan also leaves River by herself with said Teamster, and while she's a big girl now, we barely know Eric. Also, if we /really/ feel like a zombie army, there's roughly fifty lizards in pens, and they seem like at least somewhat capable zombies. That's a huge chunk of life-span though, unless we kill the soldiers too.

Of course, say we used up /all/ of our lifespan on the assault and the lizard/soldier zombie army, we'd die and get revived, maybe? And we do come back relatively the way we were before we came in, if I have any guess based on what Lora has told us, potentially with the amount of lifespan we had back then...

>Assassinate (You are Sir Fetch the Nightfeather). ENVENOMED WITH JUSTICE!
While thinning out the enemy forces is seriously tempting, I don't want to alert the Lush to our presence a couple hours in. Our appearance at the head of a literal zombie army should be a complete surprise. Maybe we can try causing a distraction elsewhere, like at that Border Farm, while Sir Fetch and his squires get to work. Is there anything resembling night-time in the Cornucopia?

And Eric said that officers getting ganked wasn't a rarity, right? What if we kill the officers, then mark them with something to make it look like there's an freedom-fighter movement in the Cornucopia.
>Sir Fetch claws a symbol into the chest of a dead lieutenant; broken chains. The other officers will think that some slaves got free and sought revenge, but the Lush will know who's coming for him.

Nah, doesn't work like that. And with how far we've come, the respawn thing isn't even an option anymore.

OH OH even better, Sir Fetch might sacrifice one of his feathers to mark each kill. Lora's wings are black, right?

I mean, I thought I made it fairly clear that this isn't an in-combination sorta vote. You have to make different preparations for each one, including and especially regarding when, where, and how you go loud. Going loud's not an optional event in these proceedings.

That's because you never /really/ put your foot down, and have always been kinda open to combination votes and write-ins. You're just so damn chill Vox. We love you Senpai, but WHY DON'T YOU EVER GET MAD?!

Wait, I forgot; you work retail. There's plenty of rage inside of you, but its a cold and bitter thing, reserved for corporate America, child molesters and people who talk at theaters.

> Burn the place

> Go with Eric's plan.

Can't the team do this while we take control of Fetch? He is operating independently.

Aight, I need sleep. Votes remain open; short shift tomorrow so there should be updates both before and after work.

Questions, comments, discussion, feedback, and criticisms remain welcome and appreciated.

Thank you all for reading and participating!

Fetch can't call the shots or prioritize targets.