What are some nice way for goblins to defend a dungeon?

What are some nice way for goblins to defend a dungeon?

Wood wall with arrow slits is interesting. What else?

Disguise it as a museum.

Dungeon:
>Hero barges in
>Sees treasure
>Steals treasure

Museum
>Hero barges in
>"Welcome sir, shall I give you a tour?"
>Sees treasure
>"Ah, a fine piece, made by Lord Vardack the Dire in the 5th century. He had an eye for finesse but you can still feel the natural touch of the craft. Shall we move on? This next piece..."
>"Please, do not touch. And no photographs please."

Cage traps. Even dragons can't beat a wooden cage.

>^^^

Murder holes, another level in the ceiling only accessible from further in with holes in its floor that arrows can be shot through or rocks and hot oil dropped through.

Swarming, goblins hate being alone

Everything is fine until the PCs actually engage the gobbos.
Goblins don't want to fight a fair battle. the initial one is going to be a fucking cake walk.
Afterwards, the alarms have been sounded, strength in numbers mode is going to be engaged.
Remember, the d20 system if you're using it means that a whole bunch more 1s and 20 are going to be rolled while fighting 10 goblins at a time. Sure they're going to roll a lot of 1s resulting in shenanigans, they're going to roll an equal amount of 20 which means punctured lungs. Conversely the PCs are going to have a lot less of the same.

Defense wish, Gobbos are going to use pretty mush the same tactics Kobolds use but with less emphasis on engineering, so no complicated trap. Anything above a shit smeared bear trap that has been scrounged at the cost of one gobbos arm is going to be a stretch. Remember, Gobbos often worship a deity, some loser who thinks that malbyguit has chosen them for greatness and has class levels works as a great gobbo boss.
They also work as underlings, remember, gobliniod is a subtype so you can through Bugbears, Hobgoblins and other things that rule over them as gang leaders..

Have them grow that fucked up dungeon flora like acid moss.

Also have them lure in creatures bigger and more fucked up than them.

Killing the party with kindness, seems pretty nice.

The great thing would be to be a group of goblins defending a castle / dungeon against a group of young female elves on the cusp of being true warriors, sent to clear out the goblin warrens as a test of their skills. They are dressed in form-fitting breastplate armor that covers most everything except their luscious thighs and arm flesh, and carry longswords and shortbows for use in tight quarters.

First off there would be a section of floor that is actually a fast-curing gelatin so that when the first elf steps into it she is stuck fast and trapped. At that same moment the floor behind it falls back dumping the other elves into another room. The trapped elf can only watch as a door opens to reveal a hungry zombie that stumbles forward and devours her while she is stuck, starting with the arms and working its way up to her slender throat. As her screams become gurgles, the other elves continue onward.

The next trap would be a little bit harder because it might exceed the technology goblins have. It would involve a room with a vacuum and a portcullis behind the door so that when the elves open the door the closest one is sucked in with such forces that she is cut apart by the portcullis. Only three elves left now.

The goblins might send a group of warriors to attack the weakened party now, which the elves would easily dispatch. But their traps are not finished yet, they are only beginning.

Controlled flooding.

It wouldn't matter. Given power creep, your standard 1st-level party is invincible to whatever goblins do. The Fighter hews through walls with Power Attack, the Cleric and Wizard take entire squads of goblins out with Command and Sleep, the Rogue moves like a ninja and just kills everyone in his way.

Barring DM fiat, there's no real effective defense.

The next trap would require the elves to wade through slowly-flowing water to reach the next chambers in the cave. Many animated seaweed plants would grow from cracks between the stone under the water, and would wrap tightly around the elf's ankles. At this point the current would increase, washing the other elves downstream so that they can only watch helplessly as a scythe swoops down from the ceiling and cuts into the elf's belly, spilling her intestines into the reddening water. At this point, the trap releases her, giving the other elves all the anguish of dragging their wounded comrade to the shore only to find out its too late for her.

The next trap would involve a long narrow corridor that is only wide enough for one elf. A goblin ambush at the other end forces the others to fight it off, so that one elf is sent down the corridor to unlock the door. As she goes, a blade cuts across at knee level, cutting her legs off. As she tries to crawl away, machines begin to churn, stabbing daggers from the floor in a repetitive motion, slicing into her belly as she desperately crawls along. The blood's really flowing now. She cries for help but eventually the stab wounds overwhelm her and she collapses. One goes through her pretty elvish face and mercifully ends her suffering.

>blanket statements
>ignores that a lot of that is subjective to group
>ignores the concepts of multiple checks or plans getting complicated
>probably just a D&D sucks meme

/v/ plz leave

At this point only two elves are left. One is killed by a lucky goblin arrow, and the last one flees desperately, hoping she can return to her village. She is thinking of her family, and begging her god to just let her escape, even if it costs her her dreams, even if it means she has to give up everything else she wanted. All she wants now is to live.

The best part of the next trap is that it's a good finished. She runs into a room with small barred drain-like entrances around the floor, barely a few inches high.

As the elf rushes in, a hammer swings at head level and stuns her, so that a rock can fall onto her legs, pinning her to the floor. Completely trapped, she can't even reach her knife to cut her own legs off to escape. Her arms are pinned as well, so there is nothing she can do to defend herself when the rats begin to venture forth from the grates all around the base of the walls, sniffing curiously, biting at her nose and eyelids. She has no defense, and true horror fills her as she realizes she is utterly vulnerable. The rats would take a few days to kill her, eating her slowly as their hunger requires. Her suffering would be immense, as the wounds would scab over only to be opened up again from fresh rat bites. Eventually they would go for the eyes, and she would scream as the rats burrowed inside her skull. Blind and in agony she might thrash against the floor hoping to slam her head hard enough to kill herself, but the stone has her pinned just right so as to make that impossible. Eventually she will die, but it will take a long, long time.

Make the walls stone, fighter ain't getting through shit. Sleep and command are low level and therefor the easiest to save against, and moreover require line of sight. Smart gobos would avoid even being visible until it's absolutely nessisary. Finally they're limited in vasts and goblins are ruthless bastards. They'd sacrifice a few waves of gobos they don't like to soak up the wizard's spell, or send in other creatures to do that.

A hobgoblin Robocop

Long hallways with holes in the ceiling. Thick, heavy doors on either side pull closed via rope mechanisms in the walls and lock with a simple but strong lock. Acid is poured in, enough to get up to the players shins. Burning feet from the acid and burning lungs from the fumes. Players don't even see what did this.

massive ranged weapon volleys

poisoned arrows

add a shaman that casts darkness every round

dead party

>The Fighter hews through walls with Power Attack

That's not even possible.

Having tunnels which are easily overlooked because a torch is not the best thing to lighten up a dungeon

>What are some nice way for goblins to defend a dungeon?

One little-known weakness of PCs is their reliance on 5 foot cubes of unoccupied space. Deny them this and they cannot move effectively. Collapse tunnels, block passageways so that only goblin-sized creatures can pass.

It would be built for goblin-sized creatures.

Most adventuring parties would crouch the whole time, and give up out of sheer impatience and desire to kill the GM.

I still don't get why the fuck dwarfs build tunnels and chambers which allow freedom of movement for anything taller, up to trolls and dragons.

Dwarves have a thing for grandeur.

same reason the average ceiling is 10 feet, despite people being 7 at most(excluding a few outliers)

Dwarves live in those tunnels. Those tunnels are their homes. generally speaking most people don't have ceilings under 7 feet in their homes.

>I still don't get why the fuck dwarfs build tunnels and chambers which allow freedom of movement for anything taller, up to trolls and dragons.

I like to imagine that dorf architects want to at least entertain the possibility of tall-folk visitors at some point. After all, who else is supposed to buy all these wonderful dwarven goods, and all these fantastic dwarven beverages? Those humies and elves might be pussies, but their coin is as good as anyone's, and they sometimes have things that dorfs want. And not all dwarves want constant war with everyone, so it can help to talk to them sometimes.

I could see it if older dwarven and halfling structures are built for small people, but most "public" areas that expect travelers (including the residences of many dwarves who entertain visitors) would be sized to accommodate bigger people.

CALTROPS

FUCKING

EVERYWHERE

As the goblins flee they scatter caltrops and small snaptraps everywhere behind them. They're not hard to spot, but will severely limit mobility and any the players do step on will add up. Imagine a group of adventurers getting to the Hobgoblin warboss limping and barely able to move, pissed right the fuck off. The fight will be about more than just xp and loot at that point, it'll be for VENGEANCE.

Two practical reasons: climate control and combating fire.

Having high ceilings means that in event of a fire, smoke will be above peoples' heads, allowing people to evacuate faster and easier.

In the south, all old houses have strangely high ceilings. Even modest ranch-style houses will have 10 to 15 foot ceilings. This is because, before mechanical air conditioning, the high ceilings allowed hot air to rise above people's heads, keeping the lower parts of the room cool. Ceiling fans push warm air down in cool months.

Dwarves are to Stonework as Elves are to Magic or Halflings to food.

You can throw 5 Dwarves into a rough quarry and have the fucking Taj Mahal built 15 foot underground in a year.

But then some human visitor will trip and hit an unmarked lever and the whole thing will implode and flood with blood