What a shit race, attracts the shittiest people too

What a shit race, attracts the shittiest people too
>muh beards
>muh axes aka piece of shit weapons that no military unit worth shit used (poleaxes and halberds were fucking polearms so they don't count)
>muh alcoholism
>muh grudges
>muh manlet

to think about it most of these traits reflect their playerbase as well

Other urls found in this thread:

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tunnel_warfare
twitter.com/SFWRedditGifs

Just get to posting kobolds or goblins or whatever it's going to be this time.

>muh axes aka piece of shit weapons that no military unit worth shit used

Best melee units in history, Romans.

Romans got fucked on by germanic tribes.

Germanic tribes used axes.

>germanic tribes used axes

you're fucking retarded they used spears and swords

They're a race of petty nerds that live underground and distrust people who aren't smelly cave nerds.

Gee I wonder how anybody could relate.

Butthurt elf detected.

>you're fucking retarded they used spears and swords

You're fucking retarded, they used bones and clubs.

The alternative are elves, a race of warrior nobility dedicated to worshiping the patron gods of state.

Nobody on Veeky Forums is remotely as masculine as that.

You're fucking retarded, they used fists and headbutts.

Tieflings
Dragonborn
Kitsune
Drow
Aasimar
Kender
Cat-people

All lightyears worse than dwarves, both in-game and for the out-of-game players they attract.

>You're fucking retarded, they used fists and headbutts.

You're fucking retarded, they used foul words and loud voices.

You're fucking retarded, they used bad breath and rapid blinking.

Dwarf players tend to be the friendliest and most reliable you can find. Dwarf favoring GMs also tend to be the fairest (to a fault, let's be honest) and least likely to weeb shit up.

>You're fucking retarded, they used bad breath and rapid blinking.

You fucking retard, they'd use intimidating staring and thinking angry thoughts.

You're fucking retarded. They used crude hand gestures and picking their noses in a threatening way.

>Dwarf favoring GMs also tend to be the fairest (to a fault, let's be honest) and least likely to weeb shit up.
My current Gm is a massive dwarf fag, and he loves dwarves to the point that he actively punishes players through unfair combat and reduced rewards whenever they refuse to take part in his latest piece of dwarf-wank.
Express a negative opinion about dwarves, guess who's getting ambushed by kobolds who will suspiciously all attack you and only you?
Express a positive opinion about any non-dwarf race? Someone's getting reduced xp this session.
I'm rather invested in this game so I'll see it through but I don't think I'll ever play in a game run by this guy in the future.

That's terrible. Your GM discredits the dwarfs with his behavior.

Pretty sure polearms won't be so useful underground.

Axes were actually pretty useful in shield walls for breaking down shields. Dwarves use shield walls all the time, since it's difficult to flank underground.

They could still use fucking swords especially since they are master blacksmiths. And it's not like they fight underground all the time you shitlord.

You're fucking retarded. They use passive aggressive body language and offensive flatulence.

Romans didn't get fucked because of inferior weaponry, you retard.
They got fucked because fancy Testudo formations were unsuited for Germania's environment, whereas the natives excelled at combat in thick forestation.

You are fucking retarded, They used the silent treatment and left whenever Romans enter'd the room.

You're fucking retarded they used shitposting and proxies.

You're fucking retarded, they used anonymous posts on a public message board and recursive humour.

Best thing on Veeky Forums right now.

We did it reddit!

Why not just call them "Nu Male" while you're at it?

That is such a reddit response.

Roman soldiers got fucked by alot of other soldiers really, they won in plain logistics.

When your army can rally after a defeat and be marching again faster than the enemy you're naturally going to win out in the War despite all the lost battles.

>Literally listed off 90% of what you will see in a Pathfinder General topic.

>Roman's getting cold shouldered by Germans

I can only image a bunch of German girls laughing at an Italian manlet.

>J-join my Empire
>P-please respond

You're fucking retarded Reddit never aknowledges itself.

> only knows the memes
> only knows D&D dwarves
> probably doesn't even know D&D's actual dwarf lore for greyhawk or faerun
> definitely didn't read tolkien
> probably doesn't read the GM's setting notes either
Stay mad man-child.

> is a dwarf-fag
> is unfair and disrespectful
Not a real dwarf-fag.
its like weebs who want to be samurai but don't take the heads of their enemies as proof of their kills.

Swords still need a fair bit of room to swing.

Plus in most settings they do do most their living and fighting underground. So if your setting deviates it's your incompetence that is responsible for them being incorrectly equipped.

True, that's where the roads, bridges and on-the-go forts came in handy. Romans legions were highly maintained and mobile armies that almost acted like a living, self-sustaining organisms on their own.

If anything, their sense of structure and discipline (like even HAVING a professional army), coupled with their superior logistical power, allowed them to win many conflicts.

Oh, I'm not saying the Roman's were not great Strategists and experts at Warfare.

They just got their shut pushed in like everybody else.

Warfare isn't about winning every battle, or even winning more battles than your enemy, it's making sure your losses are less impactful than your enemies.

You can still stab with swords as well lmao

At least they're not as bad as robots.

>what are short swords
>what is stabbing

kill yourself

Nah I'm agreeing with you mate, just elaborating on some of my thoughts. You're right again though; grand strategy > individual tactics

Point taken, still not an argument against being predominantly focused on axes/picks and hammers.

>What is leverage
A swung weapon will do more damage than a thrust weapon.

>axes

This will never stop triggering my autism. Why would a subterranean race even have any axes, let alone use them as weapons of choice? Have these niggers never heard of SPEARS? Or SWORDS? Or fucking CROSSBOWS???

tl;dr-gas the Stunties, racewar now.

Especially against heavy armor and with shit mobility.

>Or fucking CROSSBOWS???
Isn't that generally the default dwarf ranged weapon in every setting?

Axes can be refuted by using your own argument: There's not always enough room to swing.

Likewise, are caves usually narrow and crooked; you're certainly not going to have ample room to swing a polearm with, though stabbing could be possible in a long corridor.

Hammers are situational and don't deal well in all circumstances, not to mention that they require a lot of swinging too.

tl;dr if there's not enough room for sword swinging, then there's not enough room for polearms, hammers and axes either. But what CAN the sword do that the others can't? Stab.

>Pathfinder General topic
Do PF players even see race? I thought all they saw was bonuses.

...

That's how it's like in Dark Souls?

It's because dwarves are Not!Nordic in every setting, and therefore need to have axes as it makes thematic sense -- even though it doesn't make any *logical* sense.

>The swinging arc of an axe is the same as a sword
You've never actually used either have you?
The arc for an axe is far tighter.

>There's not always enough room to swing.
You don't swing an axe like a sword, it can be used without much mobility a lot more comfortably than a sword by not hacking from the waist and instead going from over the shoulder.

Plus I'm against polearms, among other things only using thrusting weapons will fuck you over when all your enemies get shields

I thought all they saw was fetishes and anime. It's basically Magical Realm General and /a/ in there.

What's wrong with kitsune foxgirls (male), user?

Just make axes and hammers weapons of religious significance since they represent the dwarven gods of industry. Give them to nobles the way human nobles have a fancy sword, then make the standard weapon a short thrusting swords for stabbing from behind shields, and polearms and crossbows for holding defensive tunnels.

Actually, it's far easier to swing an Axe in a confined space than a Sword.

This is why Boarding Axes existed and why two handed axes have existed in warfare FAR longer than Swords.

Try physics kid.
Leverage applies more energy.

>Hammers are situational and don't deal well in all circumstances
On the surface, being able to clear rock and fuck over people in heavy armor would be a lot more important in the generic fantasy Dwarven setting.

No retard they use upboats and le reddit gold XD

Actually, if you want to get technical, the Shortswords meme is pretty hilarious.

Dwarves are natural miners, most of the time they'll be in tunnels they mined through.

So clearly, they'll have enough room to swing a pick or mattock.

So the idea that Dwarves will be unable to swing an Axe is entirely pointless because they would naturally have plenty of room.

...

Dwarves were the first to domesticate lava flows

they would build into mountains and harvest the hot magma.

sweet sweet magma baby yeah.

Is it still magical realm and /a/ right now?

Judging by topic picture, yeah, probably.

I hope for their sake they also discovered Asbestos around that time as well.

It's true that there does seem to be a lot of assumption that dwarves are wriggling through tiny tunnels here. I suppose it depends on whether dwarves have a professional and properly equipped military or not.

Your average dwarf militia and conscripts are going to just pick up whatever tools they used and go to war with them, just like humans did.

The question is what would be the most effective weapons for an actual well-funded dwarven military to be supplied with. Would they stick with axes, hammer, warpicks etc. or would they go for something which makes it easier for dwarves to march in ranks and block off a tunnel the way that shield and shortsword (and crossbow) would?

>march in ranks and block off a tunnel

I have a strange feeling this is somehow an awful Idea underground.

If you want to block off a tunnel, you do it with a well built dwarven door.

The military will be fighting whatever breaks through in close quarters. Axes work better for that.

>So the idea that Dwarves will be unable to swing an Axe is entirely pointless because they would naturally have plenty of room.

Depends on the unit. Dwarf warriors, definitely. But Dwarf Miners would almost certainly prefer stabbing weapons or gas/flame/explosive schenanigans.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tunnel_warfare

Tunnel warfare is a fucking history of misery and terrifying conflict. Sites of major gold rushes are especially grim - a lot of Australian Gold Rush towns are built over the tops of dozens, if not hundreds, of dead miners who were killed in gang warfare over gold claims.

I can't even imagine that sort of pants-shitting combat.

>Using gas,, flames and explosives
>underground
>in a tunnel
Maybe humans are stupid enough to do that, but not a race with centuries of mining knowledge.

Dwarf players are usually loud, obnoxious, drink meme alcohol like rum and mead, unwashed and begrudge you for not playing a dwarf.
People who play human are still new or don't want to be there
People who play elves are either weebs or doing it to get a rise out of dwarf autists
Half orcs are the true patricians, they saw big angry rape babies and thought "yes, I want this to represent me"

Possibly poison gas would be a great weapon for Dwarves, being resistant to it and it not doing much structural damage.

Resistant =/= Immune, but yes with sufficient precaution I can see that working.

Humans have centuries of mining knowledge too

>Disliking Rum or Mead
I'm not a big dwarf fan myself, but Mead is great stuff and you are a faggot.

I know the difference, not saying they run in dick first as they pump in the gas, just when shit goes wrong it's not as bad as your explosives or oil supplies going up.

Still, an ineffective army if they only rely on gas.

A dwarf can have centuries of personal experience.
Also, mining isn't central to our entire species and culture.

Per human?

but chicks dig the italians

I can see it being used on a particularly large hive of goblins to soften them up.

I should have clarified, drinking rum or meadmto be like a pirate or a viking, because you can tell how their face scrunches up that they don't actually like it.

I drink Gin because I secretly long to be a rich old woman

>but chicks dig the italians
Italian food and culture.

Chicks dig handsome rich men, so only a few Italians.

>Maybe humans are stupid enough to do that, but not a race with centuries of mining knowledge.

Humans have been using exactly those methods to stunning effect in tunnel wars, mate-o.

Collapsing tunnels, flooding them, setting up dead-end rat traps filled with explosives.

These are the reasons tunnel warfare is one of the most terrifying kinds. Not to mention the sheer insanity of trying to keep a comprehensive map of the battleground.

Wouldn't phalanx be best formation to fight in tunnels?
Phalanx and later pike walls were effective formations used by militarises around most of the world, and it's main weakens was being flanked.
Tunnels eliminate danger of flanking and archetypical dwarven stubbornness, hardiness and discipline combined with high quality heavy armour would allow dwarven phalanx to win against less drilled and lighter equipped goblin or orc one.

Gin is pretty much only ever good in mixers. Rum and Mead however, whilst they do have certain fans who do it for perceived historical purpose, or LARPing, are just a good drink. Anyone who scrunches up their face over a smooth mead has no business drinking anything stronger than ale.

Because The Phalanx would basically be immobile as fuck because Pikes in a confined space would be fucking retarded?

There is a reason why the Shieldwall was used much much much longer than the Phalanx.

>Defending our homes from the giant tunneling worms.
>We collapse the mineshaft that took all of winter to clear out.
>They tunnel through.
>Eventually we destroy enough of our own fortress to bury our enemy under half a mountain of rock.
>No home now.

Absolutely savage.

>Bunching up altogether in tunnels.

That will only end well, certainly.

>Dissing Ale

See; the problem here is people judging alchohols on per alchoholic content and not purpose.

Many Ales are made weak on purpose because their purpose is a refreshing drink to relax with.

If you want to talk Meme Alcohol...
Absinthe.

You wouldn't collapse it on giant tunneling worms. Collapsing works better on grobi.

For something like a worm, you'd want to drown it out - lure it under a river or a lake. See how well the fucker can swim.

Unless you're the sort of shitty dwarf who can't figure out his tunneling right and is liable to flood his own hold.

But you're not that retarded, are you?

Absinthe is the exact level of stupidity describes.

Where the taste of the alchohol and the consumption of it becomes secondary to just being shit faced.

Who's dissing ale? I love a good ale.

My point is that mead doesn't taste strong at all. Its smooth and warming, but not like trying to neck neat gin or something. I'm saying no one should have a strong reaction to mead unless their usual tipple is water.

This.

>Drowning worms.

Assuming they're anything like their smaller kin that won't do anything.

The amount of bloody permateens I used to know who drank it fucking neat... Mind you, the faggots with the sugar cube and the Absinthe spoons weren't much better.

Are grobi a kind of goblin?

Even then, only reason you'd collapse is deny mobility to your enemy.

Oh I drank Absinthe neat before, it was just at the end of the night when I wanted to say "Goodbye world"