You find yourself reborn in Rome as it was 200 bc

Perfect idea.
Don't forget to take some discarded Roman trinkets on the way. I'm sure they'll have plenty value eventually.

Maybe not the killing part, but introduce everything too early. I can make a lightbulb work, know a bit of pre-calc, and understand simple stuff like gravity and cell theory. Also gunpowder

Can I show up 10-15 year early?

I need to kill gauls. Filthy fucking gauls.

Hannibal Barca will cross the Alps with his fucking elephants only to discover that all the gauls are dead and there's no filth to rabblerouse into makeshift reinforcements.

Because I am not a history major. I don't know where shit is going down and when outside of really big shit. What I do know, though, is that certain companies will make it big and that I can make a lot of profit from it. Standing out before then means being written into the history books and being photographed and documented. This leads to some silly shit you won't want when people are trying to dissect you. Instead I will be essentially nonexistent until I can strike, then fade away again and "die" so my "son" who looks startlingly similar to me can "inherit" my fortune. You feel me?

My first priority would be not attracting attention. The last thing I need is someone noticing I haven't aged in the last hundred years and beheading me.

Beyond that I'd realistically just try to keep whatever business enterprises I own afloat and take care of my family while trying my best to prepare for the eventual collapse of the Empire. Possibly move to the ERE before the split, although you can bet I'd get the fuck out of Byzantium before the kebabs took it. Basically I'd just move to wherever was going to be the most stable and prosperous part of the world in time to benefit from better conditions there (Poland during the black death, England during the Napoleonic wars, etc), since for the most part my specific knowledge of historical events and so on wouldn't do me much good I'd only really benefit from big picture stuff. As for inventing technology before its time that's pretty much a lost cause. There are a few low hanging fruits here and there but for the most part you need a very comprehensive knowledge of engineering, metalurgy, chemistry, etc before you can realistically create anything useful 'ahead of time' without the commensurate civilizational advances to back you up.

I mean I don't doubt that you have a clear enough grasp of calculus especially with perfect recall to jump start that, but somehow I don't think right now you have a clear enough understanding of the other three to just casually do that.
Still, I suppose with the money you could find good engineers and explain your "ideas" to them, help them figure it out. Medicine's going to have to wait though until you can start proving to people that sickness is actually the body fighting back against tiny creatures most of the time. You'll probably have a great hootin' time with that, if they don't instantly flag you as a crazy person.

Also:
>Either Jesus was for real, or not
>If he was for real, God would see you're fucking up his plans left and right, and would introduce Jesus differently at a different time, or simply strike you down when you stand
>If he wasn't, you'd have already fucked over the course of Roman history by that point that Nazareth would be very different

>You could also "just" prevent the fall of the Roman Empire, make them prepare for the barbaric hordes, maintain their consul system and stop Christianity's fragmentation because of the Byzantine/Roman breakup.
>Roman Republic never falls apart
>All the lands held by their Christian dominion is never lost and forgotten
>No reason to wage holy wars reclaiming any of it

If you don't manage to do it, you can still just cut your losses, hide for a few decades in obscurity, and then return and continue your work in a different direction.

>I can make a lightbulb work
Can you also create all the materials neccessary for the lightbulb, using nothing but the materials and tools available for the pre-Imperial Roman Republic?

See that the Romans get replaced on a genetic level sooner so that the Dark Age they cause can end within a lifetime or two.

Fuck all the bitches.

>kill jesus
>killing the son of God before his time

Found Thulsa Room for yall

*Doom

-Concerned Citizen

While I probably wouldn't be able to just casually do the plumbing and metallurgy, I do have a fairly solid base to start the whole "Modern medicine" thing.

And when I say that, I don't mean like surgery, (because modern surgeons are really only better at closing people up), I mean more like basic standards of hygiene. The simple shit that I could explain, and prove even. The first microscope was just two lenses and a metal tube. Get the spacing right (with the physics that I know), and voila, the tiny little creatures are visible!

And even after that I know how to suture a wound, set bones, and fight some of the more common diseases. With that knowledge, all that time, and a lack of the ethical restrictions we have these days, I'm fairly confident in my ability to jumpstart medicine.

But yeah, leave metallurgy to the others. When they get that down, we can move onto more complex machines.

>Can you also create all the materials neccessary for the lightbulb, using nothing but the materials and tools available for the pre-Imperial Roman Republic?

Lightbulbs are actually really, really simple. Lightswitches are more complicated than them.

Thief the Metal Age?

>Train like a motherfucker to become stronk
>Through good use of my newfound powers and showmanship, become known as a demigod servant of Jupiter, sent to sort Rome's shit out. As such, I become the highest religious authority.
>Use my position to advise when possible, enforce when necessary, but refrain from being the boss of everything because that's boring.
>In the meantime, obtain glorious patrician housing and a harem. Have no wife, father no children (blame it on Jupiter).
>As time goes on, my apparent immortality becomes a fact of life and my word becomes the next best thing to law.
>When Jesus shows up I tell Herod to call me the second the Jews want to kill him. When that happens, I show up and call Jesus the greatest teacher of our time and make sure that his deeds and teachings are recorded with surgical clarity. Also crucify the accusers for being too dumb to notice a genius.
>Through religion, I slowly turn it from polytheism to a philosophy of practicality, clarity, and respect of one another.
>Thus unite humanity slowly but surely through the ages, supporting great men and women while pimpslapping barbarians.

How will you provide the little things cause disease?

>Grab gladius and scutum
>Go inna woods

Alternatively:
>Find a rabbi
>Convert to Judaism
>Say something obligatorily mean to Jesus
>Proclaim myself as the Wandering Jew
>May also move briefly to where the Netherlands will form just as they form, buy a ship, and become the Flying Dutchman as well

More seriously:
>try to live my life to within reason
>Sock away some valuables or things likely to become valuable
>Keep a diary as best I can
>After a decade and a half of being twenty, probably leave my hometown and move to one of the more distant regions of the Empire
>Try to stay out of things so I don't fuck up the timeline
>Generally try to chronicle my shit and leave a breadcrumb trail for archaeologists.

Same way those guys proved that ulcers are caused by bacteria. I'll swallow a bunch of 'em and get sick as a dog.

Quod Erat Demonstratum.

Plant the seed of the scientific method and rigorous mathematics into their heads, as well as writing down some of the big stuff I remember from the future.

Beyond that, I'd try to help advance Rome and get its logistics and bureaucracy up to snuff, hopefully avoiding its collapse.

In any case, I'd probably try to found a small college and try to help re-derive modern knowledge.

Oh, and gunpowder.

>Quod Erat Demonstrandum

Merely an imbalance in the humors caused by contaminsted food! A man made sick by these little things? Preposterous.

Take 1000 people. Of 500 of them have them ingest the saliva of perfectly healthy people both orally and nasally; of the other 500, have them do the same with sick people.

Through that, hopefully show that there is a transferable component linked to disease, and that "tiny things" will serve as an acceptable explanation until microscopes are suitably advanced.

I kind of want to see a series about this bro-tier emperor chilling with Jesus.

Are you Irish or Irish descent? Then we could have an "Irishman and Jew" comedy routine two thousand years early.

>manlet Canuck's healing factor
>you can be killed if you are hacked up and burned, also healing major injuries hurts like hell

>Same way those guys proved that ulcers are caused by bacteria. I'll swallow a bunch of 'em and get sick as a dog.
You forget a crucial part:
You have Wolverine's regenerative ability.
I'm not sure if the common cold's going to kick it with you, plus by this time there's a good chance people would have already figured out something is weird about you, so they'd just write you off as a medical anomaly, if not more.

And if you get someone else to get sick, they may be more inclined to think you're practicing some sort of witchcraft, than that there exists living organisms so small.
I mean sure, the ancient greek philosophers proposed the existence of atoms, but it's different to propose something's existence and discuss it in a circle of like minded individuals, and to just show up with amazing arcane knowledge and start making people sick seemingly at will with a few rituals that seem harmless, like feeding them specially prepared meals that could have a curse on them.

You'd really need to be careful who you start with, is what I'm saying.
Christianity might be what provided the Inquisitions, but it was human superstition that justified its existence.

Just rip yourself down from it when nobody is looking.

>Jesus
>a genius
>Christianity
>a good moral code for the progress of civilization

>Humours

When did we get to Medieval Europe? Hell, I don't even know what Romans thought caused disease.

Though looking at it, I might not actually have to do much. Hippocrates came in 460 BC, and fuck, they even had catheters. I might just need to focus on metallurgy to get their tools in better condition.

>You'd almost definitely get hacked up and burned if you used you scientific knowledge.

I don't get why everyone just assumes that every premodern society is full of some sort of anti-science primitives.

As long as you didn't go all out and piss off the powers that be I see very little reason why people would try and murder you for being inventive.

Even in medieval europe the church didn't shit on you the second you did anything innovative.

> wut do?
>200 bc
>healing factor, perfect memory recall, and the gift of tongues
I will wait 200 years to insult Jesus Christ into his fucking face, and then I shall become the original Wandering Jew.

OBVIOUSLY, DUH.

Step 1: Wait till Jesus is born.
Step 2: Go meet him
Step 3: Address him in modern English
Step 4: Record what happens

Hippocrates was as theorist of the humors theory.

>He calls you by your birth name... from before you were reborn.
>In perfect english.

>implying an individual person named Jesus, Yeshua, or whatever actually existed
>trusting a religious anthology written 300 years after the fact

Jesus told people to stop being cunts and be nice. You can't argue with that unless your entire existence if fuelled by petty malice and elemental discontent.

>"Well. This is akward."

This is followed by the two of us going drinking while talking about our favorite 80s movies.

He is listed by roman census figures of the day. I a very "I don't give a shit either way" tone.

>Travel the world, speaking the language of the locals. Spread words of wisdom if possible.
>Aquire whatever skills people are willing to teach me.
>Do my best to stay alive and avoid war zones.

He also said if you don't follow his philosophy you'll spend eternity in eternal hellfire. Said philosophy being significantly more complicated then

"Don't be a cunt"

The warzones part is more important if I live long enough to see the modern day, and the invention of weapons capable of destroying me with one detonation.

>be pansy cunts, live your entire life in deference, and merely exist on the Earth because it's nothing compared to the kingdom of heaven
Yeah, fuck off.

Source, friendo.

>using your time traveling powers to save a false messiah from his justly earned punishment

Reminder that the Pharisees were right

If I'm around when he shows up I can ask him. My money is on the entire hell and even heaven stuff is bullshit, added to the Bible later when Christianity had to solidify its place in the religious market, and that Jesus was actually more like Buddha, an enlightened teacher who chose to help people instead of fucking off.

And if he says that it's all true then I'll be in a good position to not fuck it up.I cannot lose.

I'd probably spend a good deal of time trying to convince the Romans to not use so much fucking lead in their waterworks and such. I mean, the fuckers used it to improve wine flavor.

So, Veeky Forums what are some 'free' discoveries that can be used at any civilizational level, regardless of the background level of technology?

>Foreceps
>Pull a baby out with tongs any blacksmith can make, dramatically reducing infant mortality

>Hand Washing
>Use clean water to remove filth from the hands, reducing the transmission of (non waterborne) infectious disease

Heavily reinforce the concept of "people like being relatively autonomous and free, but not too much, but not too little"

Also, really make sure the Romans remember one of their saying, De Minimis Non Curat Lex.

>Stirrups. Make riding horses MUCH easier and allows for better tactics and movement in general.

>assembly line production methods. literally allowed ancient china to mass produce shit like crossbows for dirt cheap.

>basic dental hygiene. bad teeth killed more people them most wars.

>>Travel to the Americas
>>This will, unfortunately, introduce disease.
>>However, no European invaders to exploit >>the die-off.
>>Unite the survivors under my rule, bring >>technology up to at least match the rest of >>the world.
>>Establish trade and cultural exchange with >>the Vikings when they appear.
>>See what happens from there.

>All these fuckers saying they wouldn't rock the boat
Screw that shit, broheim.

Sure, maybe it's safer. Sure, maybe you get to live out eternity hiding in the shadows. Sure, maybe you get to see civilisation unfold much as it did in our time, and even catch a cushy ride on the coat-tails of other people's achievements. Maybe that's right for you.

But I'm a big guy. Tall, broad shouldered, all that good shit. At some point during my new life i'll find out that I have healing factor, and I can join the Roman army and accrue the years of service necessary for a leadership position.

After that, you might well ask what the next step is.

Well, folks, this is where I differ from y'all, I guess. I don't have some grand master plan. I want to change history just enough that it takes a different path and I can be there to see it unfold differently.

I've already learned about our timeline, so i'm crashing our plane of existence.

Maybe it'll turn out better, maybe worse.

Was making a terrible post part of your plan?

Of course!

>Giant of a man, being 6'2
>GET Veeky Forums
>Join the Roman Military and absolutely wreck shit with my healing factor
>As people age, they notice I stay the same. Once imply I'm the son of Mars, that's it. My actions will spread this rumour around itself.
>Help see Rome through its glory days, occassionally fading in and out existance like a distant watcher once Jesus arrives.
>See how everything plays out as a wandering adventuring hopping town to town.

>"So, Big J, I didn't ruin the whole 'god's plan' thing, did I?"
>"Oh, no, the Lord has ways."
>"Like what?"
>Jesus beckons you closer.
>You lean in.
>"Applejack is best pony."
>A few minutes later, the Praetorians had to be called in to stop you from burning the cross you had nailed Christ to

...

I can't stop laughing!!!

Well, what else would Jesus say to get you mad enough to crucify him? "Ultra Marines are the best chapter"?, "I liked the Drizzt series"?, "Travis' Mandos are only true Mandos"?

>Crucifying Jesus for liking Applejack
What are you, a Rarifag?

"cucked 0:^)"

Chill out, Caiaphas.

>Use knowledge of microbiology to revolutionize healthcare.
>Use knowledge of metallurgy to introduce steel.
>Use knowledge of chemistry to introduce gunpowder to the legion.
>Use knowledge of mathematics to... Get them to use the 0-9 numeric system.
>Introduce the metric system.
>Use knowledge of mechanical engineering to construct a simple steam engine.
>Use knowledge of agriculture to introduce crop rotation and varied diets
>Use knowledge of magnetics to give them compasses.
>Use knowledge of optics to give them telescopes and microscopes.
>Use knowledge of electricity to produce simple electric displays, and show them how to harness lightning
>Get them to STOP USING LEAD FOR WINE SWEETENER AND WATER PIPING!

Youre more likely to get hacked up and dissected in modern times for being immortal than burned in ancient times for knowing stuff

Would it introduce disease? You have wolverine healing powers - you'd be completely healthy, so how do you infect the locals?

I might not have any *in* me, but there's probably some *on* me, as well as on any gear I have.

He believed himself to be a god.

Doesnt come off as the wisest guy ever to me, but plenty of people diaagree i suppose.

>show them how to harness lightning
>harness lightning
>lightning
Are you implying that we've ever actually done that?

I guess. Pretty reckless of you to not sort that out before you land. I mean, take a bath or something right?

To be fair, an eventual plague related genocide is GOING to happen to the Natives, one way or another. If you arrive with your knowledge of inoculation and vaccination, you could easily slow the horrifying death rate by passing that knowledge along, after using it to help immunize anyone you encounter.

True, but I'd prefer to have the outbreak that mentions out of the way long before the Conquistadors show up.

Have you ever seen a tesla coil in operation? Tell me that isn't harnessed lightning.

The electrons that are powering your computer are the same kind that some thundering out of the heavens, just arranged in a more orderly fashion.

Also, lightning rods are a form of harnessing lightning. Keeps it from smacking your nice house and blowing a hole in it or setting it on fire.

Okay, clearly we're using two completely different definitions of "harnessing".

Tesla Coils create artificial lightning, and creating a path of lesser resistance for lightning than your house, is not using the lightning, but giving it a way to expend itself without destryoing your property.

Also to be clear:
Lightning =/= Electricity. It's as much equal to electricity, as a waterfall is equal to the concept of water itself.
You can't just take lightning and casually re-purpose it. It would need a machine of incredible properties and materials of amazing conductivity to reliably do that.
Lightning is easily the least effective way of producing electricity. It'd be like trying to harness wind energy with a machine that only functions in the presence of a tornado.

You seem to misunderstand my metaphor here. While I am not talking about literally using lightning to power their eventual machinery, your point about a tesla sphere still stands. It would be an arching ball of lightning, spewing in every direction until something come close enough to strike it. To a Roman at that time, it would appear for all intents and purposes that I have harnessed the power of lightning, if on a small scale.

A lightning bolt and a static discharge are the exact same thing, just on VASTLY different scales.

>Use knowledge of mechanical engineering to construct a simple steam engine.
Greeks did that already. They just never found worthwile use for it.
You'd be hard pressed to convince romans either since slavery is just easier and I don't believe you have the know how of constructing a steam engine that performs a task better than a slave.

Surely that could be figured out, even if it takes a few hundred years.

Bar in mind the Greek design was a ball with two tubes sticking out the side that spun when heated, and nothing else. If you could build a rudimentary steam engine that powered a wagon down the road, you'd have a completely different view on the subject.

And while I don't know how to build one from scratch, I know the basics behind how it operates. All a matter of building up from previous models, until I have the desired model.

I do live in a wealthy plebian house hold, I have access to fairly large sums of money, and if I can create something that, say, uses the bath house's own fire to operate a pump to keep water flowing through the bath at a decent pace, helping keep the water clean and creating a nice whirlpool effect for the bathers, maybe even create a lazy river for them to enjoy. The nobles would gobble that shit up.

>wealthy plebian house hold
>fairly large sums of money

Plebeian, not Patrician. You're a goddamn peasant.

Actually many Plebeian families vastly dwarfed Partisan houses in terms of funds. Patricians just had more rights.

>kill Jesus
>bye bye Christianity
>bye bye written languages that are not Latin
>bye bye printing press
You clearly haven't thought this through.
Let me guess, in the 1930s you'll kill Hitler too.

If nothing else, I'd amass a quantity of gold and use my knowledge of history to (hopefully) prevent the fall of the eastern empire. I'd maybe stop the backstabbing Angeloi and use that gold to buy Urban's services if it ever came to a siege. or maybe just travel to my country and unify it 1100 years before its time and be the son of Odin.

Did you not read the OP's post?

Disease contagion was estabilished waaaaaay back.

You just need to prove that there are much more things in an infected wound that on healty skin

>Jesus dies, and suddenly, chinese language implodes

>tfw you don't have enough practical knowledge for any of these things
OK, maybe the number system and the lead, but I don't know how I'd go about convincing them to do that.

>someone introduces the idea that being nice to your neighbor is a good thing to do
>he says that if you're an asshole you will get consequently fucked for being one when you die
Oh yeah, it's really complicated. Yup, I can totally see why it's soooo complicated user.

>Plant the seed of the scientific method and rigorous mathematics into their heads
The Greek tried. The Romans showed that they were too dumb a population for it.

Killing them off or breeding them into a smarter people by introducing other barbarians into Italy really are the only two solutions available.

>He is listed by roman census figures of the day

>A Jesus was born in Nazareth back in the days

Imagine.

>All this talk about Jesus.
Reminder that you'd be immortal, and would survive being put on a cross.
You are Jesus.

They never found hitler's body right? ;^)

>Killing them off or breeding them into a smarter people by introducing other barbarians into Italy really are the only two solutions available.

>mfw the Jews were instructed of their mission to miscegenate and misdirect from an immortal fa/tg/uy

Attain glory and fame intge battlefield with different names. Keep it that way. Travel and offer my services as a mercenary after the fall if Rome. Fast forward to 20th century: Invest in Google, Windows and Apple.
Bonus Round: Murder Tom Kirby

>Tom Kirby
Who?