FUN Times

>"Hey user, I heard you liked Chaos"

>the quinoa glistens slimely
>"what is the problem, hhhuman? We must seal the deal with the quinoa, are you reneging on the deal already?"

Is that supposed to be disgusting?
Looks like some sort of a juicy and appetizing fruit to me, micro grapes

That's what the transdimensional parasites WANT you to think their egg-stalks are.

Looks like roe to me.

Can I have it with ketchup, please?
>cue intergalactic war

I just read the filename AFTER I typed that post, oh God I thought I was being original when I called it "micro grapes"
w-what is happening

...

Hey now, I'm eating a bag of raw spinach right now and I think Brussels sprouts are fucking foul.

Lord Kek controls the memes and the memes control reality.

The filename wasn't "micro grapes" before you posted, but you have been blessed in a small way by His divine frogginess, and your words have made the filename what it is now.

The infestation has already reached your mind. Please report to the nearest medical checkpoint for mandatory screening.

Ignore this post, it isn't even real.

Most people tend to boil them, which will make them pretty nasty. Get out your skillet, some garlic, butter, chopped bacon, halve the sprouts and grill em up- make up some white cheese sauce alongside and I've even managed to get my fussy-ass wife to eat them.

So either I have transdimensional parasites in my brain, or some sort of reality-controlling ententy is real and will put transdimensional parasites in my brain because it's a meme

fuck

>"ONLY SQUID LEMON IS ALLOWED FOR THE QUINOA!"
>"Apply and consume quickly!"

...

You are just turning a perfectly healthy vegetable into nasty-ass fat-food.

>"hsssss."
>"you tallied too long hhhhuman! The punishment mushrooms have glistened!"

Use olive oil if you're a weak cunt then.

I've been to the southern USA that invented nasty ass fat food, its practically a vegan recipe down there.

Brussels sprouts basically just taste like cabbage. I don't see what the deal is. I've liked them ever since I was a kid.

I just don't like any of the cabbage related veg. Cauliflower and Broccoli are right out.

Most other vegetables are fine in my opinion. Save raw/whole tomatoes.

I cut them into halves, drizzle a super small amount of olive oil on them and put salt and black pepper on them. You don't NEED the oil, but it makes the salt and pepper stick better.

And throw them in the oven, they're easy to burn to shit but if you get it to the sweet spot, they have a nice crispy texture.

That woman was legit mentally ill and had only eaten potatoes with cheese for thirty years. Brussel sprouts are fine if you pan fry them with salt and pepper. Savory, even. Can't stand them if they're boiled to mush though.

>That woman was legit mentally ill and had only eaten potatoes with cheese for thirty years
So she's the average American

This is how you eat brussel sprouts

Nah, that's a snob talk right there. Drizzle is not even a word normal people would associate with cooking. It's a goddamn light rain.
Mush only, final destination.

>Drizzle is not even a word normal people would associate with cooking.
It is if you're even lightly interested into cooking.

But still, stir-fried Brussel sprouts are fucking amazing.

Oh. Cauliflower and broccoli are a favorite of mine and I was tempted to suggest those instead of brussel sprouts (which I detest - cabbage too also makes me want to throw up from the smell of it being boiled).

Honestly though people pushing greens upon obligate carnivours should really start with garden peas, they contain every vitamin it is possible for a green to contain, plus enough of the genetic material of earth that is most useful for assimilatory aliens that happen to be visiting.

Drizzle is, on top of being my drow ranger's name, a very common term in professional cooking - basically less than a "pour" but more than a "drop".

>Drizzle
>drow ranger's name
I'd imagine it was originally a mocking nickname given to him by older sisters after seeing him... perform.

...

Drizzle, pinch, smidge, dash and touch are actually measurements in cooking. My wife bought a set of measuring spoons that are labeled as these measurements - and by the gods, you look them up, they have actual total volumes in measurement.

In the early 2000s some companies began selling measuring spoons that defined (or redefined) a dash as 1⁄8 teaspoon, a pinch as 1⁄16 teaspoon, and a smidgen as 1⁄32 teaspoon. Based on these spoons, there are two pinches in a dash and two smidgens in a pinch.

One pinch of fine salt is approximately 1⁄4 gram (20–24 pinches per teaspoon), while one pinch of sugar is 1⁄2 – 1⁄3 = 1⁄6 gram.

don't boil your cabbage, for fuck's sake.

Cut it into wedges about an inch thick, drizzle with oil, salt, and caraway seeds. Basically the lesson from this whole thread seems to be don't boil shit

and roast the cabbage. Fuck I'm retarded

Sorry, we need to eat a lot for our freedoms and guns.

>Drizzle, pinch, smidge, dash and touch are actually measurements in cooking.
Man, you could invent new recipes with the sex dice, just replace the body part dice with ingredient dice.

>obligate carnivour
u wot m8?

he's trying to be fancy and misusing words.

Obligate carnivores are animals like cats and sharks, which HAVE to eat meat for nutrition. They cannot digest plants. Amerifats who get triggered by salads aren't obligate carnivores.

>hugging her
>not killing her to avoid her seed to spread around the world
Freedom was a mistake

You are murrican. Aren't you?

Dear diary, today I got some great cooking tips from Veeky Forums.

I don't even need the other boards anymore!