Your group's local memes

That doesn't stop them from being memes.

>"break a hole in the wall, so that I can jump through it"
The origin wasn't game related, but some of my party was there when it happened. It's basically used to break up the tedious over-planning that tends to happen before a simple encounter.

>"thats gonna be hard to do"
One of our characters played an assassin who loved to make a big show out of his kills. He would try to set it up where he was someone having a conversation with the target, and would ask them about thier future plans. When they were funished he would say "thats gonna be hard to do" and stab them. Ever since then, whenever somebody says that we roll initiative.

>I mount the wolf.
From one of our first campaigns, player who would always dick around and take nothing seriously decided to try to mount (get on top of) a wolf that was attacking us. He wanted to make it a pet. He also forgot that wolves hunt in packs. He then got his throat ripped out when the other wolf mounted HIM and got some good rolls.

>immolating puppies
Used to refer to a time when wolves attacked the wizard and he used fire to kill
>I throw my hammer
The Dwarven paladin had a laughable movement speed in armor, so he ended up throwing his hammer a lot at fleeing enemies.
It actually turned into the setting equivalent of a Dwarven thrower because he used it so much
>the wizard is an arsonist
He liked fire a lot. A lot. He torched at least four buildings, two of which were on accident.
>Knives
One of our members was a war cleric who carried knives everywhere with her, and luck was always on her side when she hurled a knife, to the point where she made a successful attack into a second - story room from the alley below.
She once tried to smuggle 13 knives into a ceasefire by hiding them under her armor- and she almost made the Stealth check for it.
One of the knives dropped out and she was searched.

Make sure the slaves obey their master.

>inb4 someone tries to anachronistically bring modern morality into the past

>I roll to grapple a motherfucker and to attack another motherfucker with him

>I play a song
Said by our gnome bard, whenever he's feeling particularly useless.

Okay, so you're safe from the giant in your sphere, but everybody else is trapped outside.
>Can I cast any spells going out of the sphere?
No.
>Am I going to be any use if I leave the sphere?
Probably not.
>I play a song

The irony is that he's the only one who hasn't DM'd and always shows up to games, so the bard is actually much more powerful now than any of the other characters

Also
>I use my multicolored stone disc
The bard again. He got a "multicolored stone disc" as a trinket during character creation, and refuses to believe that it's useless, so he tries to use it for anything that they come across. I've actually worked it into some plot points. One time it resurrected a warforged ally, one time it unleashed a horde of ravenous mummies.

ratsratsrats

Friend playing a ranger got killed by several swarms of rats. Since then anytime rats appear in any game at least two people start chanting ratsratsrats.

For D&D 5e

>You didn't pay for the premium pact package did you?

Warlocks in our party tend to whiff with their more powerful spells and hit with their cantrips about 50% of the time. One is a lucky fiend pact who's been put near death about 8 times but spent every point of lucky and devils own luck to save his ass.

>The cleric has no clothes!

Joke was that we were playing rise of tiamat and took a rest at a hotspring. We were attacked by cultists and we proceeded to fight them. However the cleric kept trying to run towards the dressing room to get his armor but kept failing the acrobatics roll not to slip because of the wet floor. By the time we finished the battle, we found out they had hidden our clothes and items anyway. Each one of us execpt the cleric had a spell that gave us pseudo-clothes such as barkskin, dragon sorcerer skin, or mage armor. The cleric was out of luck and had to fight in a towel the entire game. Each time we fight in an urban setting we make the joke that sooner or later the cleric going to get caught naked again.

>Get Stormgar! We need that thunderhead!

My character is a Paladin 3 (Vengance), Cleric 2 (Tempest), Sorcerer 6 (Storm) character. We fought a blue dragon that was attacking ships near waterdeep and he went "storm mode" by using his flight from his spellcasting to fight the dragon in the air. I fought the dragon as a thunderstorm raged on. I killed it using several thunderous smites comboed with a magic+1 warhammer and booming blade for 4d8+2d6+4 (48) thunder damage. And 3d8 thunder damage from moving plus 2d8 thunder if he actually hits me. Using my channel divinity allows me to always hit for maximum damage as long as it's thunder or lightning damage. Not a lot of creatures resist thunder but I have the adept feat.

He stays silent unless spoken to and only uses intimidation as his charisma trained skill. Using silent spell I cast spells without speaking and charge them with my free flight.

>Let's try Shakespeare
Everytime our elf bard used intimidate and pulled up "Shakespearean Insulter".
It was only thing he could do.

>children
they're useful, expendable, easily traded, and it's surprisingly easy to justify all this as well

>grappling
Rolling to grapple difficult concepts, rolling to grapple your drink, rolling to grapple with your gag reflex

First time I was running a pf game for my friends, they were adventuring through a snowy mountain range and were beign stalked by little snow people with creepy doll-like faces, which I described to them as "like masks frozen with tight lipped smiles".

Well, one player thought I meant like an actual mask, and after they captured one, he rolled to rip its masks off. He tore its face off

"Deserts"
We once had an ass of a DM who refused to do any setting but a desert. Pitched a fit if we tried to leave it and told us they'd declare the campaign over if we left the desert. Ended up finding a new DM, but not before coming up with the phrase "___ Desert" to describe our intended destination. Grasslands? Green desert. Snowy mountain? White desert. Giant city? City desert.

>The pirates won't want a burning ship!

This one is pretty much self explanatory. What is especially amusing was how it transformed from simple in-joke/meme to something of a koan amongst us.

We had the "metagaming dwarf". Whenever a player was metagaming, a dwarf would pop out from behind a bush (even if there is no bush) and yell "METAGAMING!" And go back to the bush.

> Carlos Gringos
Whenever our group of friends needed a shady NPC merchant, there would Carlos Gringos, a mexican looking trader of ill repute with a bad arab accent.

>Dookie Daggers
My group has a tradition of having enemies use very low-quality weapons that can barely be sold for scrap value, if at all. The label typically applies to edged weapons such as daggers and swords.

I could see someone agreeing with debt-slavery as a way to help people work out of crippling financial obligations, but at the same time believing chattel-slavery is unfair or wrong.

Air Karate: One of our relatively newer ones, stemming from 2013. We had a guy who joined our group for a campaign before we went back to our long running Superhero game. For those familiar with MnM we're about 380PP, PL12. Lot of high end heroes, Energy Controllers, Uber Strength guys, Elementals. New guy insists on being a Duplicator like Multiple Man. No other powers, no other abilities of note. Insists this character design is awesome enough to roll around with our Demigods. He picks a fight with a Colossus ripoff, gets stomped hard. Then goes and picks a fight with a Emma Frost ripoff, goes about as well. Immediately jumps up from his seat yelling and screaming and storms outside. He's out there for a bit before we poke our heads out to see what he's doing. He's down by our buddy's bamboo grove flailing away like a retard. He'd storm back in about every 20 minutes. Stomp around and glare at the GM before heading back out to flail at the bamboo again. This went on for like three hours before calling us all cockscukers and leaving. In our defense we told him not to make the character he did and we tried in and out of character to talk him out of starting fights with the two NPCs he decided to try and roll up on. We use the phrase Air Karate now to describe anyone having a fit because they set themselves up to fail despite constant advice to the contrary.

Option 1: This is one I am directly responsible for. Back in my younger edgelord days my first response and general only response to uncooperative NPCs (and some PCs) was to attempt to kill them as soon as possible.

Where's my Boat: Our GM had a bit of an issue with taking away our ability to travel with ease. He's gotten vastly better since then. But in the beginning he was really bad about letting his go anywhere.

>Accidental genocide

>Brothel; (verb) to blow up with tremendous force with no survivors
What a hell of a campaign.

> Fucking cylon!

Whenever we suspected a player of being a spy or traitor, we would accuse him of being a cylon. Regardless of the setting.

> TEURRRRRRRRrrrrr...

Bastardisation of the word Saboteur(rrrrrrrrrrrr...). See Cylon above.

Anything named Kevin is going to meet a horribly depressing and brutally violent death.

Joking about things being copper dragons in disguise.
Questgiving NPC? He's definitely a shapeshifted copper dragon. Sign outside a tavern? A copper dragon using camouflaging/illusion magic. A dungeon? Really big ancient copper dragon.
And then eventually it came to light that a minor NPC really WAS a copper dragon in disguise.

> Armando (verb)

Whenever a player wanted to get rid of his character, the DM would declare that the character ran away with Armando, the latin lover and Fabio ripoff.

There's always heavily implied sexual tension directed towards the only female PC by the middle-aged cleric and the dwarf. Things like using goggles that granted 'x-ray vision' and turning straight to look at her, or making crude jokes if she casts certain spells (enlarge, wall of stone, hold person).

That and our monk has a love/hate relationship with shells.

In the SW group we had one about how Alderaan is such a great place with a rich history that will continue to be a cornerstone of galactic culture.

...

This is glorious I may steal a variation of this one.

I'm in a rise of the empire campaign, this shall now become a major conversation point for the party.

Continuing on with a few more:

Gnomish Knife Fighting: Whenever a PC gets into a fight with a woefully underpowered NPC for dumb reasons such as had a bad day at work or had been rolling like shit. Origins stem from a Wizard in our party who had gotten bumped into by a Gnomish merchant and challenged him to a duel to the death in a nearby alley. Lvl3 expert vs Lvl18 wizard. It was brutal and quick.

Throw the Torch: Ages past we were in a battle with a particularly nasty Boss and we were losing bad. Our fighter was missing virtually every hit and the rare few he did connect with were pitiful damage. Eventually he said fuck it and threw a torch we'd dropped on the ground. Nat 20, Confirmed with another, and finally a 3rd 20 for a instant kill. It is a sacred and holy technique our group rarely employs lest we offend the gods with our hubris.

> Doing a Charlie

NPC death. Named after Charlie, the slightly above PC level NPC used to introdyce the campaign. Every time the GM introduced Charlie, he would die within the session like a bitch, without GM fiat.

> Eat a pile of aggravated damage.

Substitute for "Eat shit" in my old Vampire the Masquerade LARP group.

> Changing of the Guard !

We were in tower full ennemies and our fighter yelld that as we enterd every singel new floor. There were 10.... So this became our groups default battle cry.

>Any group of nameless NPCs significantly (and illogically) more powerful and numerous than the party. Exists solely to fuck it in the ass, if it forgets to give important NPCs proper respect or gets too uppity.

Your GM is a faggot. Disrespecting his NPCs is not grounds for a TPK, he needs to learn to control his raging anal damage.

I'd have kept playing Darkest Dungeons longer if I knew the jester was making pop culture references.

WOODEN. DOORS. Of good craftsmanship.

Speebds instead of speed because of a typo.

>something gives haste or makes you faster
You gained more speebds.

>Drowning in a River of Shit

When I was a fresh DM at fifteen, I had no fucking clue what I was doing, so I had my groul enter a secret entrance to a sewer system to deliver urgent news to the king of a nearby kingdom while being pursued by assassins. We just had a guy join and created the edgiest back story you could imagine (with my help, so I'm mainly to blame) who would fuck off and leave the group from time to time and refused to even tell them his name. The group liked the player but hated the character. Once in the sewers, he tried to attach a rope over a giant rushing river of sewage ten feet below him and go to the other side against the group's wishes. He was ambushed by some of the assassins who were in wait and promptly fucked over from bad initiative and poor rolls. He fell into the river, openly bleeding and eventually drowned. The best part was that group just chose to watch him die and laughed the entire time.
Later, I rezzed the player character to be a minor villain in the story and it almost wiped the party.

I know some of these old players lurk Veeky Forums too so if you want to tell your side of it, go ahead.

pic unrelated

>The number 32 / Evil Wagon Wheel
From one of the first games my group played, one player decided to break a wheel of a wagon belonging to some surly dwarves, who took major offence and attacked, crit, and dealt 32 damage that instantly killed his level 1 character. We now bring this up when someone (mostly him) does something really dumb.

>Shoot him in the drow
From the same game, One character convinced a group of kobolds that his dick was called a drow, and vice versa.

>I flip him off as a free action
From my latest game, one player asked how long it would take to give someone the finger, to which the GM said it was a free action, so now this player does it all the time at the most inappropriate times.

>Ooga ooga ooga chaka
Once my character got hypnotized by this magic thing, that made me chant "Ooga ooga ooga chaka", so now in any of our games, whenever someone gets magically controlled we all chant that.

>Push him down a well
Once a player team killed another by pushing him down a well (He was kicked out of the game for this), but now whenever we meet someone new we don't like we hint we'll push them down a well.

>I removed orphan girl from my inventory and replaced it with PTSD
From the game I run, in which a PC saved a small girl whose parents had been killed, but by the end of the session they had lost the orphan and that PC had been captured by cultists and tortured.

"I scuttle the planet."

>is there anime inside?
I have one player that constantly asks whenever he looks inside a bag, box, case, ect. If he finds any anime. He'll also ask npc's if they have any anime on them. He did this so much that i kind of juat ran with it. Since its a scifi setting i just use it as rare commodity from the distant past.

>is he cute? Can we flirt with him?

I have two chicks and one dude in my group and they all play females in game. The male player actually started this (the same guy who started the anime in joke) he and then the others will just randomly wanna pimp themselves out if my description of an npc is particularly detailed. It doesnt matter if they're ugly or mundane looking, if the description is vivid they wanna act like space-wenches. This one honestly confuses

"We're calling them X" which is mostly directed at me; I have a tendency to use names that are atypical, such as a halfling named Svant-lis (Which was promptly renamed to Swamplid), Narcisco the elf (Nabisco; He who is afraid of butterflies), Santago (Burrito), and so on so forth. I refuse to loose this battle; I will have my funny name, and they will call me something funnier.

"Chief Firefist the Great" A theoretical orc mage who continues to pop up from time to time who specializes in blowwing himself up to win.

"The Dragonballsacks floating in the dark abyss" When the group was forming, we h ad a GM who was attempting to lead us through an adventure of I don't know what. We had gone from elves in a forest, to a ruin, to this ultra-dark place under them where giant floating chromatic and metallic orbs were floating about and afraid of sources of light but eager to dispense wisdom, and so we put them into bags so that they could stay close enough for them to talk, and for us to see, but the ballsacks jokes didn't end.

"The portals dropped them there" To explain any thematic errors; close to the same adventure as above, there was a group of drow wheo were invading the surface through a single portal, which the group promptly dragged and pushed into the ocean, flooding the underdark. Ends up those were two in a chain of Star-Gate themed portals that can open to eachother. So whenever there's a badly placed monster that doesn't fit the area, the portals are blamed, sense whales sometimes appear in the rivers.

>Carlito Squeezebox, the sexiest man of all time
An accordion-playing bard from an older game who became a minor god of lust. Any time a player tries to chat up a barmaid he appears out of thin air to sweep her off her feet.

>Objective Tinnitus
When the players forget plot details, I'll have them roll to see if their character remembers, on a failure, attempting to remember the event in question causes a painful ringing in the ears.
>___-slavs
This one stems from my inability to do accents other than my own and Russian, no matter what accent it's supposed to be, it becomes Russian after a while. Examples are Hob-slavs instead of Hobgoblins, Scale-slavs instead of Dragonborn, Under-slavs instead of Duergar, etc.

Shit Wizard

First game, we were sneaking into a fort/town to murder people for some orc tribe. We diceided to sneak in via the sewers. We ended up fighting a "Fecal Golem" in one of the cisterns, it liked to use grab attacks, we all went for a good swim. After the fight concluded we were all crawling out onto a near by ledge. Our Dwarven Fighter was picking on the sorcerer for how terribly he did that fight (failed every spell he tryed to cast due to him wearing medium armor chest deep in shit). Sorcerers player gets flustered and rolls so push the Dwarf back in, Dwarf doesn't even budge and pushes the Sorcerer back in instead. This continues as the sorcerers player gets continually more angry, to the point where the Dwarf is pulling him out of the shit and throwing him deeper in. Everybody is laughing hysterically eventually the Sorcerer gives up and the Dwarf helps him out. Sorcerer got permanently branded with the nickname "Shit Wizard" and we use the term whenever the magic users are having a real bad-luck streak.

>But he was turning into a vampire!

My players use this defense any time they kill an NPC for little to no reason/to loot them. They usually roll Bluff but have taken the lie all the way to court before and didn't resist arrest.

They like to derail games into Phoenix Wright/Harvey Birdman court battles sometimes.

>1d10+500 Impact Damage
This came from us looking up fall damage for the first time in Black Crusade, and is now used to describe a character death (or serious setback) because of a rule we rarely end up using.

>But did you roll above 30?
This came from when one of the group took a turn DMing and certain plot points ended up happening no matter what, and certain NPCS were impossible to defeat. Now it's become more of a joke when you either have to do something impossible and fail, or something mind numbingly easy and screw it up

>Aaack, Aaack, Aaagh
Basically you mime having a heart attack. It came from when we had a really new player who had the most idiotic plans, and other players would mime how his stupid plans were undone by the most obvious thing (like how magic missile bolts are not invisible) and now it's done when plans are ruined by something obvious in hindsight

Our party learned recently that we've all got some kinda connection to a few gods, and after a series of trials we were told our true names.

My character is a Deva, and while everyone else's name was reflective of their life in some way, the DM hesitated a bit in trying to decide my character's name, since she's lived so many lives. So now any time I have to introduce my character to someone new, someone goes, "-and that's Error 404."

>Master Masons
I ran a campaign at a friend's birthday. The premise was that the city the whole thing took place in was in a Deus-Ex esque conspiracy-laden civil war, except the setting was medieval fantasy instead of cyberpunk.

One of the factions were the Masons, straight-up Freemasons if everything Ludendorf and Alex Jones thought about them was actually true. They are never actually seen, but in order to get anything from them, one had to clear one of their "dungeons," which were enormous, perfectly designed structures with ridiculously complex and intricate traps, designs, and shifting platforms, rooms that could rotate on their axis to drop people, etc.

They had no symbol, but the players began to notice that as soon as I started talking about how finely made everything was in their surroundings, something bad was about to happen, and it would always end with the same phrase.
ex.
"The hallway is exquisitely decorated with small murals of birds and beasts transforming gradually into men as you proceed down the corridor. The stonework is so fine and the separate plates of the construction so flush that the entire edifice seems to be constructed of one piece of stone. It is almost as though it were designed by... master masons."

As soon as that was said, they would brace for impact because some scooby doo shit was about to happen. To this day, even mentioning master masons is the equivalent of 'I've got a bad feeling about this.'

> VERONICA!
An NPC we are trying to find. No one knows anything about her as she does not exist. It started when a Rouge began to confuse people with "WHAT HAVE YOU WITH VERONICA?"
It escalated with the Scald whispering "This is for Veronica" to someone before killing them and and the Paly going on poetic speeches that somehow turn about to Veronica. The joke has just stuck around kinda. The Investigator currently occasionally asks is the evidence we find points to Veronica's whereabouts.

Trust me its funnier then it sounds.

This is hilarious.

>Porkboaring
Manipulating a die roll. Named for the character of a friend's brother, the player of which would claim to roll maximum and minimum values to create the most interesting outcomes.
>"Geeeet reeaady"
Spoken by a player upon noticing a bad; the elocution of the statement was so odd that he received a tunnel of stares from the table. The characters did the same, and the surprise round was lost. Now used whenever anyone notices a baddie and doesn't have anything insightful to say about it.
>"Woof"
Spoken in an effeminate way, used to denote the sound made by a female lupine animal companion (or, more rarely, character).
>"Dig, dig, dig...diiiiiig!"
Used to refer to the emotional sterility of adventurers in the face of disposing of large numbers of bodies. First uttered by an eidolon.
>The Great Beard in the Sky
When the GM weighs in directly on the party's plans or valuations, this is the speaker. The exact name varies based on who among us is GM.
>"DAAARKMAANTLES"
Spoken whenever an encounter is met which exists only to provide a combat challenge devoid of narrative.
>Natural Chezch-doh!
A result on a die, usually before reading the result, especially when the action is perceived to have a slim likelihood of success.
>Blink Dogs
An animal or other force disrupting the layout of a playmate.
>Expiense
Experience, spelled incorrectly on a sheet for a homemade system. Speak for best results.
>Marbles and Bells
A halfling game, wherein the players must flip handbells to cover marbles tossed by the opposing player. Halflings are advantaged in this attack-roll based game due to small size, dexterity, and a bonus on thrown weapon attack rolls. Used as a shorthand for the unsavory characteristics of the race, or to call attention to racism in any form.

>Chuuba Pocket? Oh-hoh-hoh...
Got out of the bad graces of a hutt by promising to procure one of these

>"Nat 20 on Bluff"
One of the player seduced the waitress in the inn and went to bed with her. As I (the DM) wanted to make things a little more interactive than a fade to black I asked him to make a ride check, which he failed. To that the waitress rolled for bluff : natural 20.
Many laught were had at the expense of the player who thought he was the best lover ever.

>"Fucking Crabs !"
Our first campaign had a part where the group must explore a sea-side cavern. During their infiltration the rogue player stepped on a crab token and one of the player asked if the crab tries to defend himself. I say why not and roll to hit, and bam, nat 20 again. I roll for damage and the rogue screams in surprise as the crab pinch his ankle, making the ennemy close up on their location.
The rogue then tried to kill the crab but fumbled his attack roll, so he let his knife rip on the rock and got disarmed.
It was so close to a recreation of Crab Battle.
Since then I make sure to put crabs in many location : crab for diner in the inn, crab in the mage's laboratory, crab in the caverns.
My BBEG is even a kaiju-sized archdevil with a crab motif

>"The Giant Chickens of the Duchy"
During my first time DMing the group I was new to Roll20 token system and couldn't find good picture of food. As such I picked one token of a roasted chicken and put it a little bit everywhere. Problem is : the token was pretty disproportionate compared to the players and they asked if the duchy they were in was home to giant chicken. We laught about it and nowadays every foodstuff is made of giant chicken tokens.

>It's almost as though it were designed by... Master masons."

Holy shit this is so good. Imagine if the players weren't even in one of the dungeons, they're just out in the middle of the wilderness somewhere fighting trolls, and suddenly one of them notices that the sides of the cave wall have racoco reliefs and the whole thing is actually a very well designed flying buttress, and everyone starts panicking

"As you walk along the road you come across an obelisk war monument"

>neat

"You notice the intricate detailing showing the souls of the fallen at leaving the bodies at the base ascending to the heavens at the peak."

>Wait

"The carvings wrap around all four sides easily"

>Dont you do it

"You could almost call this craftsmanship..."

>DONT FUCKIN DO IT

"Fine"

>This never happens!
I was exposing my group to a new game (Rogue Trader, for those who are curious) and they were fighting a group of thugs on Port Wander. For those who don't know what that means, normal/under-equipped human opposition in Rogue Trader is largely easy to take down, and combat can often degenerate into rocket tag if they don't fight stuff scarier or nastier than a regular human. So I figured, a few goons with cheap pistols would make for a good introductory fight to get used to the combat mechanics. I'd never killed a PC before this point without the enemy getting desperate and resorting to drastic measures, like calling in an artillery strike on their position (which also didn't work - I'm brutal, not unfair, nine times out of ten, the players have a chance to get out of danger, but it's never easy).

One player wound up burning Fate (for those who don't get what that means - he basically lost a life he'd need to metaphorically move mountains to get back) despite having heavy armor, and being in cover (which counts-as damage reduction). From a couple of goons with cheap pistols, who got some lucky damage rolls.

My reaction of 'This never happens' has been the group's refrain to refer to Bad Things when they happen to the party ever since.

>Pedro the Dwarf

Anytime a seemingly similar NPC comes up with a description that I've used in the game at some prior point, and the players recognize the description as one they've heard at some point in that campaign, they generally say something to the tune of 'it's Pedro.' This is referring to a random joke NPC in a one-off session I threw together for D&D at one point, where there turned out to be a single Dwarf shopkeeper running every shop in town, even when the shop was next door, or across the village from where he was just standing. Usually, these NPCs with similar descriptions are the kinds of characters who turn up in innocuous positions like the inn's barmaid, or a janitor or something.

>if anyone names an enemy during a fight, their stats increase
>Searing Light is a big no no due to one colossally big fuckup that killed the entire party one time
>constantly refer to named NPCs by dumb names that are not the names the DM gave them, to the point that the DM usually just gives up and calls them that name from then on "Gnomey", "Silent Bob", "Tiny Mayor"

> "Does it have a skull?"
We were playing in Pathfinder, and the cleric discovered the Screaming Skull spell. HE took a liking to it, and began to harvest the skulls of everything we fought.

>Mage game
>Long running, nearly five years.
>One player's character, Jacko, constantly critically fails important rolls.
>Rolling a Jacko has become slang for failing a roll badly.
>It's spread to other groups he wasn't part of.
>I've heard people who don't know us down at our FLGS swear 'Fuck, I jacko'd.'

>A FUCKING DOG
A party member wanted to buy a dog, so we went to find a guy who sold dogs, because it was a small as fuck town and he was like the only guy with dogs, they were going for like 100 gold, so then haggling occurred. There was onyl one dog available for purchase and before the original guy bought the dog another party member bought it and he got upset. We left the place and then the first party member threw a tantrum and attacked the rest of the party, eventually the city guard interfered and he was arrested. Various trial shenanigans occurred and he was gonna get 25 floggings and a small fine but then it was revealed that the judge fucked pigs and the party member revealed this. The judge threw a tantrum and made it 100 floggings with a blessed whip to make it even worse, this whip was held by me. Some other bullshit happens and I end up executing him.

This campaign is still going and this original party was only the prologue to the rest of the campaign, now my old character is a hyper zealous cleric seceding a colony from the Jew Republic is was under.
10/10 DM shitposting

>Unsolicited Racism Against the Romani People
Playing an ultrawealthy upper class brit. Then I was playing a Serbian skinhead. Unplanned commonality there, and it's just kind of taken off from there.

>You can't be the star if you can't hold on to the belt.
WoD game set as a reality TV show. The star tried fighting the Co-Star and it turned into a pro wrestling match. The star broke her leg, prompting the costars to plan the episode without her.

Director: "You can't do an episode without the star"
Costar: "Well you can't be the star if you can't hold onto the belt!"

Ever since then, there's just been a metaphysical 'belt' to be claimed in our games.

>PTSD Mook

Comes from the fact that my players in several 40k RPGs I've GM'd over the years generally leaving as soon as the battle is over, without spending ammo or time checking to make sure every garden-variety mook is dead (though they've been careful to double-tap anything big or especially bad). This has resulted in a few mooks racking up Fatigue from Critical Damage and passing out mid-firefight, or running, or hiding, and somehow managing to survive the fight with the utterly horrifying PCs, and leaving the survivor (usually only one) with crippling PTSD for the rest of their natural lives.

>Coat-racks
One planet's nobility in Dark Heresy lore have a tradition of preserving the bodies of honored dead and keeping them around in their noble manors. The players were exposed to this tradition by an NPC draping her coat over a dead grandfather's arms. Ever since, they ask if the local nobles use coat-racks, or refer to the planet as 'Planet Coat-rack', or generally make some reference to coat-racks if the topic of nobility comes up.

"Stuff happened! Run!"

Which could mean...

*The local police didn't find the laxative filled donuts funny at all.
*Someone let one of my characters handle the explosives, and now a taco truck has been
used as a torpedo against a bank for quick cash.
*The social experiment of giving bullied junior high kids death rays did not go over well with Superman.
*Rigging several critical valves in the city's sewer system with c4 sounded funny at the time. See the second example.
*Using hallucinogenic grenades to enhance the clown orgy has had unforeseen consequences.
*It turns out that our hacker actually CAN access the launch codes for U.S. ICBMs.
*Pissing on an altar in a Volcanic Temple was a really, really dumb idea, and now the floor is going to be lava.

This isn't so much a meme as it is me being stupid, but i have a habit of naming things that interest me, that don't otherwise have names. I have two prominent examples.

>Dumpy
This was the name i gave a clerk in a store that was controlled by cultists. The dude was very obviously mind controlled, and he was also pretty heavy set. So i started calling him dumpy, because the DM hadn't given us another name for him. It stuck. Dunno how, but it stuck.

>Cuddles
This one is a bit more amusing. In one set of events, our party was forced to explore a sewer to find evidence to prove our own innocence in a killing we stumbled on when drunk. For a while, we avoided the room that smelled of shit and looked about as bad, but figuring there might be loot that way, we decided to chance it. In the room, was a monstrous centipede. The picture the dm used for it was, for lack of a better word, cute. So i called it cuddles. Unfortunately, cuddles was killed. However, in another game, Cuddles came back as an intelligent, talking, monstrous centipede with a British accent.

>today we're finally going to play the scenario in which the GM dies
used jokingly as a threat to GMs that are about to pull some bullshit

>"We're clearly the Good Guys of the story"

This came from an ASOIAF campaign; I was playing a Crazy Fanatic Faith Militant-esque Assassin Knight (It makes sense when explained) and my friend was playing a Naive Honourable Knight that wanted to save everyone.

Sooner or later, we butchered a Sept full of children (That had taken the Septons hostage), had a village tortured (To find a Bandit King who was terrorising other villages) and I slowly killed a Lady because she believed in a different God than me.

Everytime our acts are brought up; we claim that we were the heroes fighting for law and justice.

>Whimsy-flimsy-mark-'n-scribbler
One of my regular players exclusively refers to pencils as this, and will adamantly correct people when they call them "pencils." No idea where it came from, since he just suddenly started doing it. But now it stuck.

>Stole that nigga's Timbs
Referencing when two characters - a Drow priestess of Lolth and a shroomed-out Gnome - jumped a Derro to steal his boots of speed. Now used to signal looting something in the middle of battle.

(weapon)jack Jackfist of the Jackfist Jack-of-all-Trades Mercinary Clan. Started as a somewhat silly joke character, Crossbow Jack Jackfist etc. We have so far had Crossbow Jack Jackfist both Jr. and Sr., and an Axe Jack Jackfist all lending homage back to their grand sire Fist-Jack Jackfist, first of his name. Always a dwarf.

"Well guys, things look grim. user better set himself on fire."
First time I did this my character could teleport through fires and needed to get off a battlefield.
Second one the party needed a distraction.

I don't recall a third time where this was called for but I've yet to live it down.

> agriculture
every single one of my characters has this skill in some way. If it doesnt't exist, I annoy the DM until he introduces it. I use it at every proper and inproper oppurtunity. Even went so far that at one point our DM literally let us sow a field.

> goats.
My orc warrior once said he didn't know how to herd goats. Since then goats are the reason whenever he fails at something, no matter what.

>I eat a ration
One of my friends would got very hurt in a fight. After it was over, he basically shoved rations down his throat and asked if he regained any HP. Our DM just looks at him confused and just goes, "Uh you feel full." It has continued as something we bring up often.

>Rub their tummy
Whenever a party member goes down, it has become tradition to rub their stomach. Sometimes our DM will have us roll performance as a joke.

>Covered in blood
My character is a Paladin that always ends up being completely covered in blood after fights.
It has become common occurrence for party members to ask if the Paladin is covered in blood if it wasn't specifically stated during. It has happened so much that I get a +2 to intimidation while soaked in blood.

>"Is he missing an arm?"
Once the DM was describing a noble, and went off for about 5 minutes talking about how it doesn't seem he has seen battle among other things. After the PCs start interacting with him the DM suddenly remembered, and said out of nowhere "Oh yeah he's missing an arm". So now we poke fun at him anytime he starts describing any npc.

>rub their tummy
I wonder if I could pull off a matronly character who could provide support but only through silly things mothers do for comfort.
>character gagging, choking
"Hold those arm-ies up mister!"
>hands out warm milk and it works like a sleeping potion
>feeds people carrots and they actually help see in the dark

>just fuckin keels over one day because one of the party members steps on a crack

might be funny for a one-off session.

We name it after bad players.
Phil was an edge lord who metagame Like a mofo and came up with terrible weaboo concepts. In dark heresy, insisted he get an upgrade to his arbiters shotgun that could eject lho-sticks when he pumped it. He held up game for it. Don't be like Phil.
Key Phrases: USE YOUR POWERS!!1

Their was Keegan who played a dhampir with 9 pages of backstory involving fucking his way through a distant noble family and turning them into puppets. He got into an ooc right with another player over his character concept, so he drained that players character in game, not realizing after the battle that this would kill him. He panics, begs the DM to retcon, and is able to wake me up to he's the dying halfling. He never shows up to another game. Don't be like Keegan.

Alex molested my cat, my roommates snake possibly, was a hardcore bronie, and kept interrupting the DM's descriptions with commentary on my vidya and other irrelevancies. He also took half the pizza he said he said he didn't want, and didn't pay for, before the DM HAD EVEN FUCKING PAID THE DELIVERY GUY. Don't be like Alex.

Worst of all was Rick. Rick spent 6 months undermining my character specifically, framing him for crimes he didn't commit, dredging up history from his sordid past and discretely giving it to sensitive allies, and worst of all having a fucking awful character. Who plays a news boy in fucking Egypt? DM had trouble saying know which didn't help. So he turned what should have been a successful game into a death march of mediocrity. He would also monologue against our characters loudly and in the middle of scenes he wasn't even in. We would ask him to stop And he would say he was expressing his characters inner thoughts and we were free to interject if we could read minds. He also screamed at delivery people. Guy was fucked. If you are like Rick? Fucking kill yourself.

Key Phrases: "It's what my character would do" and "it's just a game man"

Dropping one of ricks trademark excuses on any of 4 players in my groups will cause them to turn into feral gnashing beasts of rage and fury.

There was a lot of bitterness over all this as it was their first long term campaign.

>the inkeep is fat, bald, wearing a stained apron and he speaks

It sounds better in Polish but that's the gist of it. A GM used the same description one time too many and it stuck

>The Falling Anvil Inn

There's one in every town

>Johning it.

A verb derived from one player's name. Taking looong pauses to think before you announce your character's next action (especially a line in a conversation) and/or taking insults and slights against your character personally are both examples of Johning.

We have one we joke about from a former player and we just say he's losing it.

It came from a former that guy in our group. One time he didn't get all the gold he wanted from one of our adventures and felt like he was fucked over. To stop his bitching we offered him gold and he said no. Okay, fine then. That night he proceeded to try to murder every party member, got the town guard on him, and somehow ended up on top of a tower shooting shit at us and cursing at us. At this point in real life this fucking guy is flush, panting, and getting real fucking mad so we ask him if he's alright and to calm down. He goes into, no lie, a fucking 15 minute long rant about how we're fucking him over and ganging up on him. The persecution complex was unreal. So we kind of ease the in game situation and he comes down from the tower and calms down in real life. As soon as he's down he wasted no time trying to kill one of our party members and gets killed. He slammed the fucking table knocking shit everywhere and screeched in anger like I've never heard saying we fucked him over again and tons of other shit and stormed out of the house. So any time we get to a situation that looks like it can spiral out of control with a player we crack that joke.

To be fair, looking back, the guy was probably mentally ill. I don't know that, but given all the shit he did over the years in our group and then that made me think the dude was probably fucked up somehow.

It's from image related, user.

>Paladin Time
The party, for whatever reason, decides that an instance of evil cannot stand, regardless of the price; the instigating moment was when I was running PF, and my party, which consisted of nothing but Paladins, went out of their way to crash an exploding plane into a Duke of Hell.
This led to another meme . . .
>You're smiting with an Airship, got it.

>Anime as fuck
Basically any moment where physics and common sense go out the window in favor of attempting rad shit; happened in a Mage game where a player literally kicked a Archdemon into outer space.

It can also mean an instance where the players are going to actually be challenged, and won't just curbstomp their way through the fight.

>Noted
I'm recording what a player is telling me, even if they don't think I am.

>I assume you're setting explosives?
Alchemist always tried to breach and clear; it got so repetitive that every time the player tries to do something now we usually ask the same question.

>Are you Adventurers or Heroes?
Any instance the players are participating in morally dubious circumstances.

The secondary, and initial meaning, while less used, typically heralds the PCs getting brief assistance from some sort of benevolent presence when important stuff is at stake.
Basically an initially CN merc type Fighter spent the entire campaign growing as a person and acting more and more like a hero, eventually died by interposing himself between a disintegrate and a downed party member. The rest of the party, fueled by anger and the Fighter's departing soul, got up and ended up pushing the final boss' shit in.

My group had a similar thing, there was a buyer of stolen goods, any time he's mentioned the exchange would be as follows

>Ah, a job for Nicky Picket
>Why's he called Nicky Picket?
>Because he's a fence

>Whenever the fighting starts, and someone must keep initiative, the last one to say 'Not!' is selected for keeping initiative. DMs are included no matter what.
>Whenever the party starts making convoluted plans over a mere suspicion, starts metagaming or keep joking beyond the first minute or so during fast-paced noir and CoC games, someone yells 'banana split' in order to break the pointless discussions and chitchat.
>there's a version of Nyarlatothep I usually play for my CoC players. He's called Tony Thelera. He looks like a cunning half-arab guy, like Delta Green's Stephen Alzis, but wearing an old suit and a fez, acting outright creepy, and talking with an improbable arab-japanese accent, something come out of an impression of Ken Watanabe. The result, mixed with the fact that he's tormenting the players for messing with him, and me playing a bit with candles and lights during the first campaign I introduced him in, have made him the absolute, primal fear of all my players. Everything in CoC for my players is acceptable, even Azatoth himself shitting on his throne, but not this guy. he's the devil to them.
>A player in a zombie apocalypse game decided to make a character with lots of points in use of shotgun, but his additional skill rolls only gave him perform (dancing) and a phd in history, so he tried min-maxing everything he could to get extra points to put into shotgun use. The game allows for missing limbs and other deformities as flaws to get more skillpoints, so he started amassing them until he had a wheel-chaired dancing professor with no body below the waist, affected by explosive diarrhea and leprosy. He poor guy realized only upon starting the game that all his flaws lowered his constitution stat to the negative, so he literally made his character die the second he appeared. Now, everytime someone minmaxes way out of the reasonable we say 'you don't want to end like Professor Indianarrhea Jones, do you?'

>MFW my shadowrun team has been calling our guns rooty-tooty-point-and-shooties for fucking years.
>MFW I have no face.

>We were playing Rappan Athuk (big ass 3rd party dungeon for Pathfinder) with an all-goblin group, and one of us, the summoner player, had a terrifying eidolon shaped like a misshapen human whose verse was Tim Allen's grunt. The obnoxious creature was literally named Pringles and its master was named Apperol Spritz. We tried to kill the damn thing countless times. Every time someone makes a bad, disturbing character, we make Tim Allen's grunt to remember Pringles.
>Dice can be of the good or evil kind. They respond to people depending on their alignment, so an evil person will get high rolls on an evil die and bad with a good one, and vice versa. We measure dice left around in the FLGL by mtg players based on how well the respond to the most evil player of the party.
>'Believe in the heart of dice! If you want high rolls, you must roll like you mean it!' is something usually say to my players when they are getting low rolls. The fact that I usually get good rolls after saying so makes them believe.
>it's always a mimic. except when it isn't. Then it's an animated object.'
>there's always a guy with an axe in a position of military power saying 'hurr durr i swing my axe i'm important durr' for no reason.

>Pugnacious

My players grew tired of each other's inability to describe actions without using the word aggressive, so to poke fun at them we began to correct the use of "aggressive" with "pugnaciously". I attack pugnaciously, I step into the mayors face pugnaciously and get in his business, I let the orcs know i'm serious and willing to get pugnacious in this cave. Seriously, makes the typical "hardcore" character seem alittle more lighthearted and silly.

>Cover your ears!
In one of our first sessions we were ambushed by gnolls and were taking a beating. After a few rounds our warlock yelled this line before casting an AoE Thunder spell in the middle of the party, under the assumption covering our ears would prevent the damage and only hurt the surrounding enemies. He managed to kill himself and another party member. He killed like 2 gnolls but the chieftain lived.

To this day "cover your ears!" Is code for doing something retarded

>Always say hello
The group came across a crypt where lived an only half-demeted undead. As they were making lots of noise outside, the undead came out and rudely told them to tone it down. The PCs answered that it could be worked out, but that it was't a reason not to be courteous and not saying hello.
But upon the vilain refusing to greet them and only demanding an apology, the barbarian (With two coursecutive very successful rolls) unhinged the door of the temple and slammed it on the undead, killing it.

Since then, the PCs have always politely greeted everyone they talked to and always asked to be greeted back, and bacame very violent with the NPCs who wouldn't oblige.

>The poop-in-pant meter
One guys played a coward halfling rogue with a QM who thought scaling was for chumps, which means we encountered very powerfull ennemies very often, and even fleeing was difficult.
The rogue would increment his poop-in-pant meter each time he was scared, and it often ended around 20 at the end of each session.

>Gnolls playing violins

Refers to mary sues/special snowflakes in general. In regards to one of our players who wanted to play a Gnoll for a AD&D2E game, which we wouldn't have minded so much but then he made this really edgy and dramatic backstory about Gnoll royalty or something and his guy could also play the violin. Apparently that last fact was the breaking point for the DM, who finally shut it the fuck down and the player got super butthurt and didn't play with us for several months. Good times.

>Praying to the Kraken
Barbarian saw a troll melting in a vat of acid, went nuts and tossed a body from a recent fight into it to appease his newfound god, the Kraken. Proceeded to roll like a glorious bastard rest of the session. Ever since we all pay tribute to the Kraken.
>Leeroy Hawkbeard
Halfling hero of great renown and multiple settings. Invented the most powerful alcoholic beverage in any setting and it's only legal uses are cleaning coins and removing barnacles from ships.
>Baxter the dumb horse
Take that dumb horse from Family Guy and make him the main mount of the party. In every game. Even in settings without horses.
>Kooky and Krazy Kirby
Whenever you are in need of a magical item, Kooky and Krazy Kirby is there!
>Daniel-ing
Holding your dice in your hand and shaking them for a long period of time before you actually roll, usually while constantly making "hmm" noises. Named after former player.
>"I turn into a spider"
My contribution, played a druid once and morphed into a spider while flying a griffon while escaping orcs on wyverns. Flew off, landed on a face of the lead orc and he freaked out so bad he fell off just as I transformed back and took his wyvern.
>FIREBALL
More recent one, we were playing Mines of Phandelver for 5e and the flameskull in the mine cast fireball on the party. Someone was playing music in the background and right at that moment the song Fireball started playing. Killed two characters with it too. Now when people cast fire spells we all yell FIREBALL
>In my defense, the children were acolytes of Asmodeus
Whenever we kill cultists, the DM usually references that there were children in the group. This refers to my Drow Rogue killing something like 10 children in a temple to Asmodeus and his defense to his party was "they were acolytes of Asmodeus"
>Retreat is just a reverse charge!
Whenever we have to flee and a player wants to stay and fight, this is mentioned. refers to a barbarian character

>Throw a knife at it

One of the player's characters is an expert at throwing blades, and in EVERY SINGLE COMBAT ENCOUNTER he will throws knives at enemies. Even when riding on the back of motorcycles. So every time combat is around the corner we all yell for him to THROW A KNIFE AT IT!

>How's that secret mission going?
Spawned from a MST3K reference (we quote MST3K way too much) from the movie Mitchell, where the bots mimic a civilian asking the titular character how his operation is going (because he's being super conspicuous), and another bot replied in Mitchell's voice: "err, move along". In regards to our group, in my space opera game one of the players was drunk off his ass in one of the sessions, and while they were on a classified mission he started blabbing on about top secret information while the cab driver is sitting right there. He then also proceeded to monologue his plan to break into a facility while a bystander stood near them. So we reference the MST3K joke by saying "Hey x, how's that secret mission going?"

You sound so... young

I'm 30 but if I shaved my beard and mustache off I'd look 18. Did it once about a year ago and went to work and customers asked why I had a management position at such a young age...