The Adventurers Guild Veeky Forums: Ye olde, Grand reopening! Edition

Sometimes i understand why the Mistress drinks so much.
>sighs trough his nose

Well, there is not much that we can do.
Wish to go mountain climbing? I hear our neighbours are having issues with trolls.

>Stomps inside.
About damned time. I've been wading ,chest deep, through nothing but ankhegs and bandits for the last couple of months...

Well. It seems the grand re opening is not a total waste after all

>pushes his fist into his palm and bows slightly
Wellcome to the adventuer's guild.

>looks at the newcomer's race
And what class might you be?

Might as well pull up a seat and grab a tankard. What do we have to drink?

...

>Looks up to Marth.
...this is seriously all we've got now? -sighs- Should I just go find Sohai and Czarina? If I grab a prybar I am sure I can separate the two long enough to make an appearance.

>The pugilist manning the bar looks up

Perry, Schnapps, Beer and strawberry wine

Uhm...
>He searches through the keg room.

Tarbisian Ale. White apple Snerples... Grey Mead... Jocas finest wine... Green Spider Silk dip..... and a few other kegs of nameless Mead. Anything interest you?

I hope the angry mob outside didn't hinder you too much. Take a seat, and hope they don't break down the doors.

>Flies in and then over to the bar and stands on the stool

I'll have a cup of that wine, please!

>Takes out a gold coin from her pouch and puts it on the surface of the bar.

... honestly... How you ever got so ripped, I'll never know...

PAH! As though a few peasants and rabble ever stopped me before?

Here you go
>pours her a tankard and adds a straw

>pets his belt filled with chemicals and needles and grins

Wait.... do I know you from somewhere? Like a story of some kind? One thats been passed down through the last twenty or so, generations of Wyvern?
by the by, this adventurers guild is set about 300 years after the old one.

Cheers!

>picks up the cup carefully and starts to drink a few sips... then puts it back down with a big smile!

Ah, that hit the spot!

>not not let anger cloud is judgement

Marth, deal with this one, il wait for a different recruit with more potential

Hell with it, give me your strongest stuff and mix it all up.

I swear I'm gonna need a new troll slaying job soon because 'apparently' my troll slaying has been 'disrupting the peaceful population'!

That's... absolutely disgusting.... cleaver, but still disgusting...

Why?

>Gives him a tankard filled with pure schnapps

>feels the familiar buzz of withdrawal and gives himself another small dose to last a few more hours

>He slides the cup across the bar to him.
Doesn't it always! I mean, we're doing the world of Thelia Gran a massive service, but do we ever get any recognition for it? Noooooo.... we get slapped with law suits, and bills for damages caused!

it just seemed right after so long. Doesn't mean you can't play the same. Character from older threads, just say time displacement, or imprisoned within a demi-plane in which time passes slower then the material realm

Why though? Do you fight near settlements?

>takes a few more sips of her strawberry wine

So now that I've ignored you to a sufficient degree, I have no answer to your question. I am but a man who knows how to take care of business.

>Points at her.
That's a fairy. Who let in a fairy? Oh Gods, I wish we had a bard or a scribe here to record this.

Oh Gods, did I walk through ANOTHER spacial anomaly? I swear, if I had a copper piece for every time... Just joking, no. I don't die. Deaths afraid of me. In fact, I got a love letter recently from a secret admirer. Strange too, since it came from Sigil but has no return address. It makes a man wonder... -He grins and winks.- A fella can dream, right?

>decides to not remind him of the time when an orc cheiftan got decapitated over a "miscalculation" in the guild's funds

You there, dwarf.
How many trolls have you killed in your travels?

>finishes her cup of wine and puts it down

There's no need to record something only for little old me! I'm completely unarmed, you see?

>makes a little twirl, showing that she has no weapons whatsoever.

>Downing the entire tankard

Well, last job was the worst. Turned out there were a few trolls living underneath a wooden bridge near a town, demanding payment for safe passage for everyone passing over.

So I did what I did best, and it turns out that my fire-imbued hatchet doesn't actually need to strike anything to set it on fire.

Last I checked, around seventy.

Didn't you hear? The fairy populations of Thelia Gran hVe made a resounding come back as of late. Something to do with "less deforestation" or something like that.

And now that you mention it, I do remember the original Marth Wyvern saying there was some distortion or something around the old guild site.

Well, not me, but a lot of other adventurers I know do. Besides, adventurers and taverns ar the side of the road font always mix well together.

Do you wish to make it 71 today?

>The massive man stomps over, moving more like a giant than human. His armored fingers rubbing his beard.

Mind you, not that I am exactly worried about you pulling a toothpick out of nowhere and giving out nasty splinters, more of an amusing sight as I don't see many fairies out and about.

>He'd stiffleing a chuckle at hearing this.
Oh my, if I had a copper peice for everytime I've heard a similar story... I could probably have paid for another guild hall by now.

>Frowns with a furrowed brow.
Nar'sfeifth...

Anyroad, that means that... ...that means...

>Holds his chin, deep in thought. A sudden twinkle in his eye appears as he gives a wide, toothy grin.

That means that I have back pay coming my way!

heh
you'd be surprised how many lives are taken with no weapons involved
>grins, some of his teeth are metal

Not really at the moment. No need to spoil a good drink with bloodshed.

I see... that's unfortunate. Maybe you could've taunted them to lure them out or something. Oh well, what's done is done: you can also learn through mistakes.

>shakes her head
If I were them, I'd confront the monsters out in the wilderness to avoid collateral damage.

>laughs delightfully
Well, I suppose there's a first time for anything. And most of the fairies don't really mix with humans and other tall folk

No, not really. You'd like Sohai though. Or would've. Actually wait, no. You WOULD like him. Damned monks and their timeless blah, blah rabble...

Fair enough,
what is your name, mountain dweller?

...
>The young noblemen would be sweating a little bit, before pulling out the guild rulebook.
Uhhhhhhh....!
>He'd speed through the large book, trying to find some rule within its pages that would say he isn't owed back pay.
UHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
>He's sweating profusely at this point. Having reread the book atleast three times now.
>He'd smack the book closed before bashing his head against the bar out if frustration.
HOBGOBLIN TURDS!!!

That... is... REALLY a fair point. S'pose that I hadn't properly considered that angle. Oh well. Keep an eye out for jobs that need doing and we'll partner up sometime. I haven't gotten to party with a fairy before, sounds like that could be interesting.

>his smile drops
Bah, stinkin monks, with all their wisehead bullshitery, if they spent so much time getting stronger than they do meditating, they'd do something in their lives

Drakons reaction is basically pic related

I would love hunting some monsters again: makes my blood boil every time!

I'll be staying here for now, so you know where you can find me if you'd like to partner up sometime

Wipe that damn look off your face! Just because you've been missing for 300+ years, doesn't mean we have to pay you!
>"Or that we could..."

Oh, and I am Zinnia by the way: what's your name?

Yeah Sohai is more of an alcoholic than a monk. Though that doesn't mean that I haven't seen him manfight the Tarrasque. Well these days... or in those days? Look, my point is that he isn't about raw muscle, he is about skill and precision. You don't see a man on his lonesome pick a fight with avatars of the end times and win, single-handed, all that often.

>The man grins.
Yes my tiny companion! We shall be legends! Well that or at least you'll be dragged to that status. I've been there for ages, evidently...
>Looks at Marth.

Hah
>finishes cleaning his teeth

Allight, point me at an avatar of the end times and il win it for you, princess

I eat Beholders for breakfast. If you can't cough up the coin, then the guild has to find another way to make this work. As far as I am concerned, it's only been a couple months while I was out gathering ankheg shells and hides on a job. In fact...
>Unrolls a large portable hole and points inside.
I may just have made the bastards extinct with all the queens that I found.

Eh? Oh! Zinnia. Neat. I am Drakon Deritako Macar, born of Saer'rio. ...not that any of that means anything or makes any sense to people in these parts.

Nice to meet you Drakon! Well, I wouldn't really mind becoming a legend, although hunting for treasure is very appealing.

Delving into ancient temples and ruins to get the treasure there is the best thing ever... for me, at least!

If you got the stomach for the gore its a very fun job

More yes than no. After all, tallfolk can't really end up in a shower of blood and gooey fleshy bits after you dive into a monster's mouth to throw a highly-explosive device into their esophagus!

>Nods and points at

Although a lot of it can be summarized as fun. Fun being Fairly UnNatural...

>He pulls out what should have been a sizeable two-handed greatsword, looking more like a longsword in his grasp. Showing that his left hand was backed with slashing and piercing talons from his gauntlet, over his wrist and fingers, while the gauntlets finger tips ended in hooked talons.

After a long enough time, you learn your own crafts and trades from it all. It is quite a thrilling life!

...I am REALLY beginning to like this fairy.

You would be surprised how far blood and brain matter can squirt when a head is hit hard enough

You're right: there's so many monsters I haven't had the chance to hunt yet.

I -Love- the thrill of the hunt~

>she says with a faux-innocent smile

Well, the record I've seen would probably be about 32 feet more or less... but then again, that was because my companion was using a greatsword against a very big, hairy possessed chimp so...
>shrugs

>takes a big drink from a bottle

Only thing i learned is how to clean blood stains

I don't mean to interrupt you all, but I'm pretty sure forum games belong on /qst/.

if it makes you feel better, then next week we can look into doing it on qst

That was a really polite response. Shit now I feel bad and hope you guys get to stay.

>A small goblin, with a frog on his head, licks his crumbed fingers as he walks to a bar stool
>He jumps and climbs onto in, before ordering

"One groga, pwrease."

>they burst trough the door
Pedro: Scuza, we are late for the opening, but lets get started right away

>they set up their instruments

youtube.com/watch?v=NRUj6M0tpLo

...do we have the money to pay them when they are done?

>looks at the champion, crossing his arms

>pours him the tankard

Dear gods, I'm surprised you even managed to make it here!

Another goblin, another job gonento someone else.

I'd assume. After all, it's only a few silver to pay them for the night...
kek, captcha put up a storefront about salsa!

>Takes the tankard once it is full

"Fanks!"

>Gobbles it down greedily

>Stops drinking

"Hey! Whats doesh dat meanings!?"

well thank you kindly! We hope we're allowed to stay around as well! If we do, then feel free to join us one day!

It means exactly what I said. One more goblin adventurer joins the cause, and one more job goes to someone else.

Just don't poop on the floor, or set something on fire, and I won't have to pull out "The Wyverns Talon"...

Little man is my friend, you threaten him, you threaten me.

>his forehead vein pulses

>Insulted

"You finks wez cant takings on an adventwure!? Weez show youz!"

>Stands up on chair

"Wez wants a duel!"

>The Frog Croaks

>smells a bet
20 copper on the goblin

I raise it to 50

>He'd sigh before reopening up the guild rule book, and flipping through its pages.
>Eventually, he'd flip about three quarters of the eay through, before showing the page to the pugilist.
>The page would read; " For all members of the Esteemed Adventurers guild, there shall be no spewing of fecal matter, vomit, setting of equipment, people or inanimate objects on fire"

Just telling him one if the rules is all.

... by the way. Has anybody managed to enter the basement yet? There was supposedly something down there... but I'm not sure "what" it is...

>He lets out a sigh.

You people are ridiculous! I have nothing against the going here. I'm simply stating the rules, since the last goblin who entered this place decided to poop on one of the nice rugs up in the library!

Be more specific.

Dibs on the kill
>vaults over the bar and runs into the basement

"Wez aint jus 'Goblin'. Wez Grimblebit!"

>Grumbles
"Weez shall seeings to it."

>Hops off of chair

Runs after

>a man walks through the door, wearing a motley of different colors under a leather jerkin
>some may recognize his style of dress as typical of the free legionaries that operate in the east
>he carries a large zweihander over his shoulder

.....Not without backup!

>runs after Asnov

>He shrugs.

The stories never said. All I know is that ny ancestor, original Marth Wyvern, not to be confused with me. Said that there was something hidden within the basement. I figured you would know

He didn't say WHICH basement, which level, which subfloor or which section. Don't go getting yourself lost there.

...and watch out for that tunnel to the Underdark! There's brain-gobblers down there!

>He face palms as soon as the trio had left.

I'm surrounded by idiots...

This is literally the most generic and vague call to action that I have ever encountered. I can recall a lot of things and none of which point at a singular specific poin-

...It was the old guild masters secret stash of booze, wasn't it?

There is MORE than ONE basement!?! Gods above and below us! Nobody told us that!

>He shrugs at this.

No idea... Great ancestor Wyvern never wrote much about the old guild master. He just made him seem... weird?

>He flashes the Merc a smile.

I hope it wasn't to hard to get passed to rioting peasants and delegates out there. Who knew people could get so upset over mini sandwiches...

>He shrugs, clearly not knowing what Marth is talking about
I heard there was some sort of adventuring guild here?

Well you have the paladins barracks, the cleric shrines and temples, the armory, the forges, three treasuries that I am not supposed to know about, the arena, the sparring room, the training room, the weights hall, the wait hall, a few levels dedicated to storage for non-perishables that are held in stasis, courtesy of a certain Loose Cannon Sorceress. There was the meeting hall, the secret meeting hall, a feasting area, a second and third kitchen, the portable market, the sewers, the brewery and stills... Uhhh, oh yeah and then there was the entry to the initiates gauntlet.

That would be us, my good man! The fully reopened Adventurers Guild of Thelia Gran, at your service! Are you looking to sign up?

And that is not including the crawl spaces for the thieves bunks, all the miscellaneous personal quarters and a nice secluded spot that Sohai and Czarina would frequent. ...If they're down there, I ain't going. For all I know she couldn't contain herself and had another surge that froze them in time.

Ja. Is there any kind of trial I need to do?

Uhhhhhhh.....
>He'd flip through the field booklet on "how to run the Adventurers guild, when your Alcoholic guild master/mistress is not around: Edition 7 circa 1178 RG"
>"If a new adventurer shows up wanting to join, have him sign the contract entitled 'We are not responsible IF...', a copy of which is provided upon page 761. Afterward, have him do something stupid."
>"Well thatlast part seems easy enough around here..."
>He'd hand the man the contract. Indicating where to sign his name.

Please sign here, here, here, reinitial here, sign here, finger print here, and list next of kin, here...