Elf General Thread - /egt/

>thinks it's a quest fag
Nice try.

>in Wow
there's your answer

Bosmer from TES are kinda this
Because there are no elves in my setting

Because of the uncanny semi-horseface they harbor.

Because they've fucked up too much to be allowed to be.

Because I base my elves on the works of Tolkien and Warhammer Fantasy, not anime elves, which are the worst elves.

Can you prove Tolkien's elves weren't cute?

FFXIV has some interesting elves in Ishgard ( being basically isolationist hardcore Catholics crusading against dragons ).
Although that is more due to region/nation rather than species, but still, a nice depiction.

>Are there any popular portrayals of elves that avoid the stereotypes of super awesome magical samurai enlightened philosophers?

Vulcans

Because elves aren't cute.

The orcs are elves named for the tribe that dominates the biggest of their home islands, the Orcu, they're largely famed as sailors and pirates and often clash against one of the big seafaring human peoples, although they much prefer to just raid the coasts of their old homeland. Their current main leaders are a femelf who basically took over with a vengeance when her husband was murdered during peace negotiations of all things, and a melf who reputedly took two bites out of a nearby kingdom's leading admiral's heart, the first one before it was cut out.

The alheder rebellion is essentially what's left of the kingdoms that are now landlocked between a bunch of human invaders. Most of their nobility is, at this point, either dead or gone, with a few gone traitor, so they're essentially led by democratic kings who get elected every two years. The current leader managed to get reelected for 24 years by now, and she and her four predecessors are essentially bogeymen in their neighbors' fairy tales. They still use the ruins of one of their old kingdoms' capitol as the seat of the yearly assemblies.

The more stable elven princes in their islands aren't quite sure how to handle either group but maintain secret talks with the two and tend to provide one of their few venues of support besides two other non-human groups.

It's all been kinda done but that's most of the elves in my setting. The last group is somewhat less fleshed out due to not going there (they're steppe elves)

No, but I like to put more emphasis on them also being badass and warriors, founders of civilization and, contrary to anime elves, even having noteworthy male elves.

Again and again I hear about that those elves are pretty interesting, but this won't make me play a MMO. Is there more than just some wiki article to read about them?

Here's some lorestuff an anonymous dumped a year or so ago that I thought was interesting and grabbed:

>Elves are from Norse mythology, and in Norse mythology, one of the only places that will survive Ragnarok is going to be a place in the land of the elves. Only two humans will survive, but presumably many more elves will, since it’s their home and logically they'd take shelter in that one area that was untouched. As such, instead of being the doomed elder race of the past, you could view them as being the race of the future, who will inherit the Earth after humanity falls.

>Okay, so, that's real mythology. For an actual fantasy setting, simply say that the elves once did a great service for the Gods (or at least this is what their own religion/history states) and in return they were promised to get the Earth after humanity dies out.

>So, for all these centuries, they've been waiting for their turn. But now humanity is expanding, exploring, thriving, and the elves are starting to wonder if they'll EVER die out. Some are even starting to think maybe they should "hasten" the process. Others are trying to mingle with human society, to make the best of things while they wait for their promised dominion of the Earth. Some are even trying to explore AHEAD of the humans, claiming the lands the humans haven't already taken.

>For a civilized culture, compare them to some of the later Chinese dynasties; utterly convinced of their own superiority to other cultures, they shut their borders to outsider, only decades later those "inferior" cultures show back up, and while the xenophobic society hasn't advanced or change, the outsiders HAVE.

>You could have the Human-Elf equivalent of the Opium Wars, and the Boxer Rebellion.

I hope they reuse the nightborne even if they're mostly palette swapped belfs.

FFXIV has surprisingly interesting nations in general, with Ishgard and Gridania being the most unique and Ul'dah and PirateLand being somewhat more meh.

finalfantasy.wikia.com/wiki/Ishgard

It should also be noted that playable elves are still backwoods forest-dwellers and not from Ishgard.

Elves aren't just a problem, they're an infestation waiting to happen. They live absurdly long lives and reach physical maturity quickly.

“I think a single elf female, assuming maturity at twelve, no physical defects or disease, and one child every two years, hmmm... about fifty to sixty-four children before old age brings a halt to her productivity.” She glanced over at Celeste. “Don’t forget that twelve years after having her first child, her first child is potentially ready to have children of their own.” Elves are an impassioned and family-oriented face. Blood is everything. They don't have families, they birth entire clans. To that end I portray them with the same sort of perspective one might look at italian or japanese mafia families... or like the hatfields and mccoys. The key to dealing with elves is this: don't. Or, if you have to, kill as many of them as you can and hope that you wipe them all out, because they'll eventually be back.

wew

what flavor of elf is the best? dark, white, or brown?

Hail Traveller! O Wanderer -- where turn your steps this night?
For mist has licked the jade green vales and washed the hills of light.
The wise ones keep far from these Deeps,
for in the shadows dwell and creep
all manner dark and sere and fair
of twilight's kith - these woods their lair.

Dear Traveller! O Wanderer -- trace back your steps this eve,
for whispers glide on zephyr's wing, and eyes watch from the leaves.
They toy with those who venture near
from twig and branch and hollow peer;
with piercing touch, and laughter cold
and kiss to steal away the soul.

O Traveller! O Wanderer -- if must you tread on so
then heed this song and follow 'long the path the sun will go.
And nevermind sweet serenades
to lure your feet on promenades.
And nevermind the golden scents
that taunt with yester's remniscents.
And nevermind temptation's tune
that glitters like a star-strewn noon.
And never ever dare forget
that those who passed -- the fey ones let.

>my elves hate dwarves!
>my elves hate humans!

What's all that even from?
Typically though, elves are much less fertile than humans, less interested in fleshy fun or their females work kinda like dogs and have periods of heat every few years.

It's headcanon, as much as your post.

>as much as your post
Uhuh, that comes from settings I've read that had elves, though. Where the author exactly tried to explain how come a race of near immortal hasn't spread all over the world yet.

My elves are the refugee's and survivors of Alfheim and ...that name for the Dokkalfar home (fuck you it's long) who were displaced by Ragnarok. Their original home plane actually had a high concentration of flora which, in human terms, flooded the air with highly pleasurable chemicals that, among other things, created a dreamy sense of euphoria as well as time dialation - hence why elves can (or did) live for hundreds of years without going insane, they could lose awareness and compress time for long periods in their native environment.

Unfortunately, since their displacement, this has effectively left their entire race as a bunch of addicts bereft of their fix. Warhammer 40k-esque results have followed - they either live very dour, controlled lives, or have great difficulty controlling addictions and their increasingly erratic emotional behavior. 'Unseelie' are essentially elves who have gone batshit, and are basically Dark Eldar crossed with the beings from Hellrazer.

True, which is why I sorta specified Ishgard instead of Elezen in general.

Personally I liked La Noscea for the dialect. Ul'Dah is very interesting, I don't know about Gridania - never really liked the Shroud in general.

>Where the author exactly tried to explain how come a race of near immortal hasn't spread all over the world yet.
Which is stupid when you think about it, they should be able to spread easily even with the low birth rate.

Can you cite some of them? Of course the things you said can be true in some settings, but aren't a universal truths. To me it seems that the reason why elves aren't outnumbering all other races is just never really addressed, the long life-span is just something all take from Tolkien without really considering how he balanced it out and Veeky Forums just tries to justify it afterwards.

Because they're not a mortal race separate from the faeries.

I need your advice, /elf/. Should I stop wearing sundresses in my childhood friend's house even though I'm a christmas cake but still a tomboy?

Is this the birth of a new epic meme?

The Shroud is interesting because the people essentially live in mortal terror of the elementals that protect them, which if provoked could slaughter everyone in the woods.

>Should I stop wearing sundresses
Only if the other option is to get naked in your childhood friends house.

I know that reference.

dude, I don't think this will help in getting rid of >elf wat do tier threads.

>elves
absolutely disgusting

This is what questfags want.

what?

>killing cute elves

/a/ please go, this is a manly elves board.

Are you gay? Why do you want to fuck manly elves?

user, it would be a honor to take a long, ancient and majestic high elf dick in my ass.

That's pretty gay man, besides elves shouldn't be fucked with.

Where is this from? It's quite lovely

Why would an elf always birth one child every two years? That's insane and doesn't account for things like economic ability, child mortality rates, parent mortality rates, etc.

Probably something to help with the dwindling population or something, you know, trying to bring it back up.

>muh manly elves
>muh cute elves

Whatever, it's all fine, the tone of a game dictates how you play these sorts of things. All elves are fine, even Sioux gun-monk elves.

>All elves are fine
But cute elves are finer.

Bosmer in TES probably count, at least the ones living in Vlanewood. For some reason, 80% of the ones we see in the games tend to be comic relief, but thier homeland is supposed to be a huge rainforest that wouldn't look out of place on Catachan, and the Bosmer themselves are expert hunters and archers, who practice cannibalism due to a cultural taboo about not wasting meat (they also have a taboo against harming the plants of their native forest, so they either import wood or make everything out of skin and bone). Wood elves in general are fairly often somewhat savage, but still usually have some amount of the "enlightened and better than you"-ness present.

DnD also has, among the bazillion different elf subraces, wild elves, who are basically wood elves ++. They're tribal savage elves who, rather than having the standard elf stat bonuses of low con high dex, get +str and dex and -int, making them as strong (and dumb) as average half orc.

butthurt questfag detected
go back to your containment board, your kind is no longer welcome here.

>Typically though, elves are much less fertile than humans, less interested in fleshy fun or their females work kinda like dogs and have periods of heat every few years.
Even then, elves as commonly descipted would have a very high population growth rate once they reach a certain population size. Elves generally live longer than humans (usually at least a few hundred years, sometimes thousands of years), remain in their prime for most of that time, and often have access to magic or natural abilities that would make them less likely to die from diseases (which was the biggest cause of infant mortality). Even if the average elf has less children per year than average human, a larger precentarge of their children will survive to sexual maturity, and the older elves stick around and are able to keep breeding considerably longer than humans.

They'd have harder time recovering from disasters that wipe out most of the population than humans would due to slower "ramp up time", but given enough time their rate of population growth would keep increasing at a higher rate than that of human population.

I'm not a population dynamicist, though, so I can't give any real numbers. Migth be interesting to see what would happen if somebody would use some population growth model to compute the growth of a theoretical elf population.

I really don't mean to open a can of worms here and go off topic too much by why is this thread allegidly made by a "mad quest fag"? I understand what is happening around the new board but how is this thread connected?

Please stay on-topic and keep your posts related to elf and elven subjects.

"hurr durr you guys want quests off so you can have more elf slave wat do threads hurr durr".

Questfags are mad at generals

Got it thanks, let's return to elves.
Long ass lives or a more regular lifespan, what do you preffer?

spees elves

Long ass lifespan is one of the fundamental things about elves, which they share of course with other fantasy races. I see no reason to take that from them, but in my opinion you can have immortal elves as well as "only" 500 years old elves. Tough I would only take immortal elves as non-playable race, this life-span is already difficult enough to balance for playable characters.

>normal eyes
I bet the isn't even taller than humans. Get out with this "fan"-art.

Longer than human, but not ridiculously long. Like a few hundred years.

The problem with elves that live for thousands of years is that writers rarely make them feel so old. Like, take Warcraft's night elves, who due to being granted immortality are pretty much all over 10 000 years old. That'd mean that one would've been old enough to have already been ancient when the Roman Empire was still a thing. Yet their leader gets outsmarted by orcs and has to be told by a human king that charging all of your archers at a fortified enemy position might be tactically unwise. Also, the who thing in the lore about the night elves sacrificing their immortality to stop the demon invasion in Warcraft 3 kind of looses some of its impact when the natural lifespan of elves in the setting is still like 3000 to 4000 years. They were only immortal for slightly longer then two lifetimes, and even after losing it they still live ridonculously long.

>Please keep all elf related conversations to the elf general thread.
>dude, I don't think this will help in getting rid of >elf wat do tier threads.

>implying that shitposters care deeply about arbitrary rules

I would prefer regular lifespan with only a few Elves having long lifespan. I am tired of the usual reasoning behind the long lifespan being "it's magic" and is given to every member of their species. If magic is the cause of the extended lifespan then the Wood Elves should have been much lower than their High Elven counterparts since they do not partake in magic as them and would rather live off the land.

Elves having regular lifespan with only few "Archmage" having long as lives feels much better than being the usual mary sue race they are mostly portrayed as. This way we can have unique culture and societies for Elves than the usual "better humans" crap they are thrown as.

What exactly is the purpose of elves?

The symbol of a once golden age slowly fading away.

Alright give me some sun elf wizard portraits right nau. Male or female. This is going to be superior master race character from evermeet.

>nD also has, among the bazillion different elf subraces, wild elves, who are basically wood elves ++. They're tribal savage elves who, rather than having the standard elf stat bonuses of low con high dex, get +str and dex and -int, making them as strong (and dumb) as average half orc.
>tfw no strong but bit dim amazon elf waifu.

>wanting a dim amazon elf waifu
>wanting an idiot for a waifu

see

>medium length ears
>straight eyebrows

She looks like a high elf with purple skin, which might just be the lighting

Rate my elves, elf thread

And to warn those wise enough to remember of follies by their example.

>Annatar & Celebrimbor Smithery and Sorcery to preserve the Noldor stock of Middle Earth and make Lorien great again

>These mythals are pretty awesome all things considered...

>Hello my name is Cu'jara Cinmoi and I recommend Nin & Inch Pharma for all your contraceptive needs

>Wouldn't you think a warp god born of orgies being pure evil illogical? Three is not a scientific sample size.

Oh yeah

>There's no way A FUCKING LEAF has anything to do with the White Walkers

...

I bet the isn't even taller than humans. Get out with this "fan"-art :)) Does this rustle your jimmies?

brb calling the ordo xenos RIGHT NOW

Do you even care not even slightly canon this is from all perspectives?

No one but autists care about 40k canon.

> you will never catch a young white-haired female elf alone in the forest and strike her with a dispel magic spell and win initiative getting the drop on her with a greatsword sneak attack and slicing a great wound in her belly, following up with a throat punch that leaves her unable to cast her spells, before tying her to a tree and slitting her vocal cords so that she cannot cast spells. Next you smear her wounds with honey so that it attracts ants which begin to feed on the interior of her wounds. Over time she will start to go septic, and will get necrotic fasculitis which will slowly dissolve her beautiful smooth white flesh into a sickening, bubbling gray mush. She will suffer for days, possibly weeks, near-death from exposure. Returning while wearing an invisibility ring to leave water for her, though you may have to force it down her throat to keep her alive. She will beg you for release but you will not oblige. By now half of her body is dead and the infection is spreading. She will die as her liver and kidneys cease functioning as the ants begin to consume her body, and massive infections spread through her heart and lungs. Once she is dead, you can cut her free, leaving her body strewn and pouring water onto her torn clothes and skin to accelerate the decomposition process. The insects and blowflies will swarm her corpse, bloating her beautiful hips and belly, popping out her eyes, pooling dark blood in her legs, turning them thick and shiny purple. Eventually she will rot into bones, returning her flesh to nature where it belongs.

user no

Get out Virt.

...

I wish you'd stayed dead, Virt.

who in the devils is Virt exactly?

He's a shitposter who constantly spounts tryhard edgy shit like that greentext up above, usually about women violently and gruesomely dying. None of it is genuine, but I've heard other anons describe his dedication to this act as on the level of Christian Bale in "The Prestige".

He first did this shit under the tripcode name "Virtualoptim" before getting publicly banned. Now he's back as an user, and he posts all these shitposts to his tumblr to brag about it.

I like Elves, but it really bothers me how they've become overly sexualized, to the point that you can't play an elf character in games without getting comments, jokes or outright harassment for it.

I think that Elves would be very valued as slaves due to their craftmanship and capabilities to store lifetimes of experience in them regarding professions or knwoledge in general. I think it'd make sense for them to be quite valuable and kept by the same human or dwarven family or noble house over many generations. I think they'd eventually earn their freedom through their exemplar service, and the right to own elves of their own, perhaps.

Can't kill a fucking legend

I hate elves to but

jesus

Question: Do drow have pink nipples/tongues/labia/cockhead?

Or is it all solid black?

Golden red.

Basically, think of the sexiest native american you can. Then combine their features with the sexiest elf you can think of. But keep the hair and skin color of the native american.