Pathfinder General /pfg/

And one that's all about being an old lady that rapes little boys, and one that's all about the scat, and one...

It just went ON and ON and ON....

People crossed the magical realm, but at its very ends, they were warned by things far worse than the whizzard;
>No, anonymous friends. Do not go past this point, for there lies only depravity
>What depravity could you possibly speak of, magical realm
>and there, beyond the cliffs of what the fuck, beneath the bowels of FATAL, lay this book.

>I mean, the Mother of Monsters' ritual also involves you getting sexed and jacks up the size of your sexual organs, but it doesn't turn you into a furry, so it's instantly far less objectionable.

Wait a second, Lamashtu's ritual can give my character a horse-dick?

That's like when folks such as Rick Santorum tell you they know just how disgusting gay sex is because they think about it more than anyone, and that's how they know they're straight!

From the sounds of it, literally.

>arcane kitsune
Ear and tail fur are always in delightfully clean, conditioned, soft, untangled, and freshly scented condition. Thank you, Prestidigitation!

>non-arcane kitsune
Ear and tail fur get unkempt, matted, smelly, sweat-drenched, sticky, tangled, and dirty with just a few hours of adventuring.

Why would you ever settle for a non-arcane kitsune?

Wasn't that one already in the original book?

Isn't this just a compilation?

Maybe it's a horse, maybe it's Baragon, maybe it's toadstool's mushroom.

The ritual for binding the one that turns you into a tittymonster furry doesn't involve sex.

Not the ritual itself, but once you've actually done the ritual, the like. Manifestation or whatever it's called.

JESUS FUCK you're right

Hold up, is this from official Paizo material or is this from that new book that's getting posted in the threads? Because I thought the only rituals available to Lamashtu involved butchering people or willingly fucking a monster with the express purpose of getting impregnated.

None of that involved getting a floppy donkey dick.

Is there anything wrong with this at all?

Hey /pfg/. I wanted to convert the unusual races from the 3.x books Mythic Races and Races of Evernor. Any advice?

This is a 3pp thing of pact magic that Augunas worked on.

It's not actually Lamashtu, just the spirit called 'The Mother of Monsters'

And while bound to her, your sex organs increase in size as the physical sign.

...

Ah, I misremembered her name. Ah well.

There's also Fey Baraddu, whose personality influence is basically turning you sex-crazed, forced to sexually pursue anyone you find even REMOTELY attractive.

Theoretically no, I can see cat-centaur polymorph thing being written by a non-furry, but the fact is it was.

This feat is pretty weak for a level 8 feat...

But it look fun as hell...

The fuck is with that third totem bonus?

>Your sexual organs are drastically enhanced in length, size and girth.
>You must create children at every opportunity

I need this, getting corrupted into a horny human with a monster dick is my thing.

It's just constant Unseen Servant. Doesn't seem amazing considering how little you can do with that spell

that's not even the worst thing in that book

I think it's for Divine caster who doesn't have Unseen Servant naturally.

Arcane Caster would probably just use Heighten Mount > Alter Summon Monster for a better 16 hour long servant.

>how little
Well, SURE, if you've got gullible partymembers.

But not all of us are that lucky, and this feat lets us invisibly hold dead horse heads next to the king's face when he wakes up, put high explosives into position and light the fuses, set up locked-room murder mysteries... all those things YOU get to just go "hey bill, wouldn't be awesome if you.."

Costs us a feat.

Sphinxtaurs are love though.

user, you can just make a mask to let you be one all the time. Assuming your GM allows custom items.

Because they're part of the Great Race of Yiff.

You know, it would probably be reasonable to model them after the sphinxes that already exist (gyno/androsphinx, etc.). It wouldn't be totally unreasonable for them to be large, though maybe medium with powerful build would be more appropriate for a PC race.

We're talking about a playable race, right? If not, can we talk about that instead?

I'm right there with you user.

Also it can lift 60lb of weight. Good for screwing around with Halfling/Gnome/Goblin.

Dude. That's a Lamia, not a Sphinx.

At the very least an Unseen Servant can be used as a tactican nuke by holding a bunch of pressure-plate bombs and then being ordered at a distance "let go".

Here's the furrymaker, by the by. Its manifestation involves you getting sexed whether you want it or not.

He's not a furry, honest.

He's just a degenerate who can't keep his dick out of his works.

At this point, the conflict between modern uses of lamia and what lamia actually are is plenty excuse to make them whatever the fuck you want.

Yay, freedom! Right?

...

>not bipedal sphinx
Shit.

Put it in the proper grading bin. The trashcan.

That's just your generic anime catperson then. Perhaps with an egyptian theme.

Not saying the egyptian theme doesn't improve it, but come the fuck on man. At least TRY.

>implying I care how many legs you put on your own homebrew race

Girl, you can have whatever you like.

I'm not of the opinion centaurs of any kind make good PCs. And sphinxes absolutely need to stay rare.

With wings!

But quadrupedal is better. Should they be big for you?

Did you mean "A Maftet"? Because That sounds like a Maftet.

Actual sphinxes or bust. Sphinxtaurs are a stupid meme.

I did a Sphinx PC race a while back.

docs.google.com/document/d/1y7eoXhQWU9TxBou4VNE0bhjoxHSbdiXobk3rv59p8Rw/edit?usp=sharing

Reply hazy, ask again later.

This thread has failed

Well of course. Any thread starting with
>Pathfinder General /pfg/
Is doomed to fail

Fuck you, OP.

This new book is abhorrent. The world is a worse place for it existing.

Think of any game in which turning into a big titted furry would work, like any game at all where this would be a thing that you could do on a regular basis without it negatively impacting the game.

If you can think of one, you are almost certainly the author of this book.

Now see, big tittied furry is at least able to be looked past.

I mean your character could have been a big tittied furry beforehand, and it's mostly a visual aspect in a largely nonvisual medium.

I feel like Fey Barbadu or whatever his name is' personality influence is worse. It just turns you sex-crazed. That's action, not visual. Far more disruptive, I'd say.

Ah, well the one that turns you into a voluptuous panther-girl also makes you want to fuck people. Just as long as they're men in power. You completely ignore women in power.

Failed at what? If we intended to get into tirades about muh women and talk overly fondly about furry races then we succeeded. The secret to success is to not attempt anything too difficult.

What class/archetype is the astronaut of the pathfinder world? You know, the cool kids of the arcane

'Men in Power' is a lot narrower of a scope than 'literally fucking anybody you find even the slightest bit attractive'

Wizard.

Well yeah, but it's still just as bad. You can find any small group and find a person in power among them. That shop over there? The person running it is in a position of authority over their employees.

Probably Arcanists. They get the best bits of both types of casting, AND swanky magic shit only they can do because they're SOOOO COOL.

>catboy conquered every tribe in a 100 mile radius before he was 12 years old

Would you waifu this badass catboy?

No, because he makes you into the waifu.

Hence the discussion.

No.

Especially since that implies such affections would be returned. Which is not the case.

>conquers every tribe
>badass fighter
>gets killed by angry moms

'K, sure.

i just started a pathfinder game and the gm only wants to use the core book so i wasnt allowed to use cavalier
i said fuck it and went with paladin because i was dead set on my Don Quixote build and ill be damned if rules get in the way of my fun

so i need help getting my character optimized
how usefful is a lance if not on horseback
(i have a horse but cant bring it into the crypt we have to explore)
dm says i use it at -4 to hit
is this true? can i do anything to make it viable off my horse?
also i could really use some recommended pally feats

Is there a download all option for this shit?

I agree with the latter, but the former I would counter with the fact that most centaur races aren't really built with the intent of being player races in the first place.

I have always enjoyed using them as NPC guides/recurring allies, though. It helps when there's a reasonable stat block to use, though would it be interesting to develop a centaur template?

Nnneat.

Just save the webpage and all the pictures'll be in a folder there.

I thought that wasn't too bad a request for a mother of monsters ritual, but then it has sex with you. So it wants to bone you with your children watching. Why such blatant fetish fuel?

Your DM hates you and is intentionally gimping you because a Paladin threatens his undead encounters.

A lance does not give a -4 off your horse, get a greatsword (or the first available skeleton sword) and go back in just to balk at the DM's next attempt at ruining you.

I just don't see centaurs adventuring with other PCs. A reclusive NPC race is all well and good.

PC sphinxes is retarded.

...

It's less "adventuring with" and more "tour guide for this quest".

>that ceremony
Literally, I can jack off and summon her and I'll still get a massage.

BRB spending way longer than needed summoning her.

Three children means you've made more life than you'll take out when you and a partner dies.

Having them watch is meant to desensitize them to freaky sex stuff so when they're old enough to make babies, fucking the wolf-man doesn't seem like that weird of a demand.

That's fine.

This all just gives me the heebie-jeebies

Odd, the thread's labeled /pfg/, but it's a F.A.T.A.L. thread....

If this guy is male, then why does he turn you into a catgirl and demand that you pursue all other males with romantic interest?

Does he approve of only het cat sex?

Don't forget that you're constantly groped for the duration of the pact!

>And one that's all about being an old lady that rapes little boys, and one that's all about the scat

Which ones are these? Post pics.

Does anybody have a copy of the Occult Adventures playtest with the original version of the Medium, with the Harrow deck-theme? I'm doing a rebuild of the Medium class as a thought exercise and I want to compare it to the original playtest version.

>Cavalier
>Paladin
Don Quixote is a swashbuckler.

Almost every one of these is sexual in nature.
Who writes this stuff? Is this what happens when you have no standard lore to draw from? Everything is based of fetishes?

It's like the entire book was written by going down a big ass list of porn tags and writing vestiges for each one.

...

Pretty much everything said.

The lance shouldn't give -4 unless you aren't proficient with it, and paladins are proficient with all martial weapons. Get a greatsword if the GM pushes the -4 thing unless you're a girl.

As far as feats go, Power Attack is the only one you'll really need, maybe some of the mounted charge feats if your GM is going to stop being an asshat about a paladin in an undead dungeon.

He said core-only so it still doesn't matter

I would point out a minor thing in his defense:
Pact Magic and the whole binding etc thing is based loosely on Goetia, and every 3/4 of the Goetic demons are specifically noted to do things like 'make the woman fall in love or lust with you' so if you're gonna blame anyone, blame old Solomon or 14th century Italian occultists.

If she constantly gropes and massages you, does that include your hands?

That is SO lewd!

Yeah, but Wizco managed to make a whole book of actually goetic spirits without falling headfirst into f-list bullshit.

>A lance does not give a -4 off your horse
i suspected as much, is there any rules that state that so i can argue for off horse lance work
though you may be right, he will probably just house rule it as he mentioned that lances are fragile and will need to make a saving throw or break when used
>get a greatsword (or the first available skeleton sword)
it's my first pathfinder game care to elaborate on why these 2 are op?
>Don Quixote is a swashbuckler
im roleplaying a jousting knight who has severe brain damage from a horse kick to the head

>your GM is going to stop being an asshat about a paladin in an undead dungeon.

i think if he cared that much he would have let me role a caviler instead of a paladin
the whole game isnt going to be about a crypt it's just the first mission we are undertaking

>tfw your DM makes you roll Diplo but still determines the outcome by RP

Why do people do this? Why are social skills the one skillset we have to ACTUALLY have before we're allowed to use them in the game?

I'm bringing a padlock next session, and telling the rogue he has to pick it for his next Disable Device check to count.

I can't find the old lady one but have some incest instead.

>it's my first pathfinder game care to elaborate on why these 2 are op?
Skeletons' swords are actually going to be terrible, but anything that doesn't give you a -4 to hit because of a bad DM is better than your situation.

Greatswords are great because they have the biggest damage die of any easily available martial weapon (2d6), plus a 19-20 crit range and their status as two-handed weapons, which are objectively better than any other type of weapon except a bow because you add 1.5x your Str modifier on damage rolls with them.

Why is it missing random pages? Don't mind the 'this is a R P G' section, but dammit feats are feats!

Look, you try writing a 100 spirits and not mentioning incest once, it's probably really hard.