Tell me about your anti-climatic fights

Probably one of the many points where we killed a boss that our GM made while they were sleeping. As the game went on the bosses got progressively stronger defenses where they were sleeping yet we still always managed to sneak in and kill them through a combination of ridiculous over-planning and luck.

>We've finally hunted down the mage that killed the family of one of our party members
>It's showdown
>The mage calls us fools and starts weaving a ball of fire
>Fumbles
>Sets himself on fire
>Dies from his burns

Post the cap, I'm lazy and want to save that shit.

Dude, do you even need to ask?

>Have a story
>Veeky Forums fucking loves stories
> should I tell the story?

Playing Savage worlds, Weird War 2 setting Pcs have befriended npc french girl named joan. Set up epic fight with a machine man tank. PC's hear it coming and hide. Joan gets noticed, she fires Mp40 at it full auto, deals 45 damage kills it before Pc's go. (Note one player was making combat roles for her under dm's supervision)

>Throwing a grenade at someone
It's just going to bounce off his weapon and back at skimask douche. Best case scenario, it roles down the rest of the stairs and does nothing. Worst case scenario, the explosion injures him.
What a fucking idiot.

...

>Pretty good but I wanna know how y'all dealt with the effects of fucking up time.

Didn't. It was the last session. Literally the last thing that happened for the game.

GM hadn't expected it so he didn't really have a response at hand for what happens. That was nearly five years ago, and unfortunately he's passed on since then so we'll never know what he thought should happen.

My personal headcanon revolves around a injoke the group had, about Father Time just being the greatest time mage around and him just having a shitfit and trying to fix up the mess other shittier time mages leave behind.

Much appreciated, broseph.

>Vampire campaign
>Due to some fucking Tremere shenanigans, my Brujah character is set to fight someone she absolutely cannot win against in a few days
>Campaign is coming to a close
>I've always been kind of pissed off with my fellow Tremere PCs anyway
>FUCKIT.jpg
>Start passing the ST notes
>ST starts rolling, passing me back notes as well
>Note passing continues for about ten minutes
>I'm sweating bullets
>Fellow PCs are sweating bullets
>Malk PC is busting a gut: He knows exactly what I'm doing
>Note passing is done
>MFW I diablerized the entire Tremere power structure (including two fellow PCs) the day before my duel and I curbstomped the enemy my tasty, tasty meals made me fight

The Malk figured out what I was going to do before I did and couldn't stop laughing. Couldn't tell if it was IC or OOC.

But blowing your brains out at that age would make you never grow old enough to become the BBEG, causing you to never need to stop yourself from your reign as the BBEG, meaning you never went on the adventure and never blew your brains out.
This of course means that you can grow old enough to become the BBEG, and therefore do, meaning you have to go on a quest to kill yourself (as the BBEG), leading to you blowing your brains out.
See event 1, ad infinitum.

If I ever have a situation where I want my players to play 100% serious, I will inform them that the next enemy, or cult, or group or whatever that they fight WILL actually be me versus them. I tell them I will actively try to kill them, that keeps them on their toes. If they succeed, I go back to normal GM.

Father Time stepped in and scrubbed the whole mess.

Yes please!

Doing this from the GM side of things, so do excuse me if I come of as an idiot.

>Not quite first time GM, but still newish to GMing. Naive and fairly stupid
>Decide to run a one shot for the 4e group I'm a player in
>Invite some other friends too because why not
>Make the mistake of letting one player use a homebrew race and caster class
>I am assured that it's all balanced, I trusted this guy's judgement at the time, my mistake
>Skimmed his sheet, seemed okay, if a bit on the powerful side, but that's okay because my one-shot's full of really tough guys who can take out a squishy mage like this without an issue
>Cut to the game
>Adventurers are hired to shut down a prison break, hell is literally breaking loose
>Solid frontline of a minotaur fighter and warforged warden
>Orc Ranger and Half-Elf Cleric make up the backline
>Homebrew guy literally does nothing during combat, roleplays when social things come up
>After much violence and carving up of enemies players eventually make it to the boss chamber
>Boss and flunkies don't bother with speeches or intimidation
>Homebrew wizard thing gets first initiative
>Expect him to continue to do fuck all
>Nope
>Rolls a daily spell
>Instantkills the boss and everyone else in the room
>The damage was far above what a character of his level should be putting out
>I apparently didn't read his racial bonuses well enough, I'm an idiot, I know
>Apparently this homebrew race gets to slap their arcana scores onto every spell they make and this guy's arcana score is well over 20 at level fucking 8
>MFW I re-read his sheet and see all of this shit
>MFW the dungeon I spent a solid week preparing goes to shit because this guy designed his character just to fuck it over

This is what I get for trusting my players and assuming that any homebrew is going to be balanced, I know.

i also probably deserve this for even considering allowing homebrew into a 4e game of all things

That's kind of the point

>D&D 3.5 Campaing Forge of Fury
>Roll half orc barbarian, maximized to the max.
>Climatic fight against duergar. Rogue hides in shadows prepared to sneak attack, wizards buffs up, clerics prays to the gods.
>I shout: "we came for your gold". Rage, charge, crit boss for 46, cleave crit underling for 50 something. Fight ends.

>Playing in a 3.5/Pathfinder campaign with all materials allowed from each, including third party materials
>It's also a gestalt campaign
>Our DM was and still probably is a fucking idiot, although I haven't played in one of his games in three years
>He said that we had to munchkinize in order to survive his campaign
>I never felt challenged before in one of his campaigns and expected this one to be worse in that regard
>Yes, I did speak to him prior to this about upping the difficulty and cutting out the third party materials and so forth
>Several times
>Munchkinize with the hope of teaching him via demonstration that the way he runs his games is terrible
>Campaign ended with my character having 11 levels in artificer, as one half of the gestalt, plus 1 level in wizard, 3 levels in psion, and 7 levels in psychic theurge for the other half
>Was able to create items for 2.5% of market price due to stacking feats and class features
>Effective caster level for item creation was above 20
>DM let me make custom equipment and construct creatures
>Churn equipment out for the party at an absurd rate and the equipment increases our power by about two orders of magnitude
>Every battle is brief and comically easy
>Final get to the BBEG for the first campaign arc
>Loser named "Mirror", 20 levels in antipaladin and 20 levels in something else, I can't remember what it was
>Had some ability that reflected all magic and psionics, even gods couldn't touch him
>DM was stupid enough to give us this intel ahead of fighting him and we didn't even have to work for it
Continued

>go to face the boss of the dungeon, a vampire
>we're winning but it's tough
>suddenly time stops
>a bigger bad guy (a recurring villain, but not the big bad) shows up
>he kills the vampire in one shot
>he takes the loot we were after
>wizard calls bullshit
>he cuts off the wizard's hands
>he leaves
>time unstops and we can do stuff again
>we just kind of look at each other and go "what the fuck" and scratch our asses

>Antipaladin so charisma bonus is added to all saves, high AC, invulnerable to magic and psionics
>Final battle, everyone else is tense and expects this fight to actually be hard due to aforementioned invulenerability
>Lol, implement the Final Solution
>One of the five types of golem I had designed was the bulwark golem, which had the ability to generate a 10' X 10' wall of force for ten rounds a day
>Have my minions box Mirror in and teleport many, many doses of gaseous poison inside the cube
>Can't remember which poison it was and I don't have the Pathfinder core book anymore, but it dealt constitution damage and both gaseous and ingested poisons have a rule that states that each dose beyond the first increases the save DC by 2
>Mirror had no chance at saving, I was rolling in gold and had so much of EVERYTHING to spare
>Chokes to death in four rounds
>At the end of those four rounds the DM has a half-blank, confused expression that indicates he's holding back some aggravation
>Campaign died, don't know if the DM actually learned the lesson or not because he graduated at the end of that semester and I haven't seen him since

Here's one that, as a GM, was a bit anti-climatic at the time.

>star wars game
>group is having a celebration with planet locals after freeing them from the empire
>one player is the group's jedi
>he senses a "disturbance in the force"
>goes off to investigate alone
>sith happens
>it's jedi player's first sith
>they clash lightsabers for a bit, trading blows and dialogue
>we're both having a good time of it
>sith vanishes midfight
>jedi is wandering through the forest looking for him
>i'm describing the stuff and then cut myself off when the sith lunges out at him
>"i swing my lightsaber at him"
>he rolls for it, hits, rolls damage
>he does a mediocre amount of damage
>but it just dawns on me: the sith was near dead from before, and certainly dead now after that last attack
>"with a whoosh you cleave him in half with your lightsaber and his body falls, in two parts, to the ground"
>jedi player loved it, thought it was intense
>i'm like yeah that was fun but in my head i'm like damn i should have cheated and had him stay alive a bit longer because there was more i wanted to do

Read up on Mage's rules, that way you can realize how retarded what you posted was

Forgot one thing, the reason why I went with the gas is because we'd also been explicitly told that Mirror had armor with bullshit damage reduction

I love how dumb Savage Worlds' combat is. The Rippers campaign I ran was full of the players killing super monsters by just screaming and shooting or stabbing it until someone got lucky enough gib the monster. The Action Deck also helped a ton, especially the "that was the baby" card.

>Couldn't tell if it was in character or out

Then you were playing a fun Malk by the sound of it. My favorite clan, and I'm shit at playing them.

>Vampire: Dark Ages
>Party has been chasing around an insane asylum escapee
>He is some kind of botched half Lycanthrophe
>We corner him in a city manor in Budapest
>After we immobilized him using a fishing net coated with beeswax and silverdust, get flanked by a La Sombra Vampire using shadow tricks to blink around
>Brujah crits perception roll to guess where he will pops up next, activated celerity and hits him with 5 spear thrusts
>Chapter boss dies after the first one

>epic campaign
>final encounter was supposed to be Tiamat
>OP characters, so setup five consorts to fight first
>buddy's minmaxed character one-shot each of the epic dragons
>couldn't touch the other minmaxed player through his AC and DR (both triple digits)
>fought to Tiamat and one-shot her

To be fair, the DM later admitted he had started the campaign to show off what an overpowered character he could build.

>investigate why Elven treetop city is no longer communicating
>bad guys have taken over and taken away all the Elves
>gruelling, bitter tree-to-tree fighting to discover more
>almost die at one point
>finally get to end boss
>he comes out
>is intimidating
>makes a speech
>combat starts
>charge in
>Catfolk gimmick build with loads of natural attacks
>basically one big, angry furball on Full Round Attacks
>hit with all attacks
>do huge damage
>kill the fucker in turn one
>DM visibly pissed off

Most of them I have a bunch of muchkins in my group that powergame severely.

> L5R HoR3 Campaign
Traveled to the City of Void as bodyguards for the Mistress of the Void (The best/highest ranking of the Void practitioners in the Empire).
> Cruise through the city
> Take the opportunity to do some crazy Void bullshit that's tied into our characters backstories
> Having a good time retroactively messing with our personal histories
> Reach the centre of the place
> It's a fountain of liquid void guarded by sentient armour
> The armour tells us "You can't come in..."
> Mistress of the Void uses some woo to bitchslap it to pieces
> Wellthat'sfuckingsuspicious.jpeg
> Mistress of the Void has a clear path to the fountain with the party behind them
> "Yes! I've achieved unlimited power!"
> Yeah that's actually not the Mistress of the Void that's an imposter and also a dude
> Time to kill this impersonator

> What was supposed to happen:
> Fake Void Dude slaps the party around with woo
> Has an auto resurrection
> Drinks the water after first death
> Goes mad due to being an unbalanced dickbutt
> Chases party through this MC Escher painting of a city til worn down

> What actually happened:
> Our rocket speed party all beat the faker's initiative roll
> Scorpion Duelist makes a called shot and hits him in the neck for a good 50 damage
> Head flies up into the air, then the auto resurrection pulls it back onto the body
> New round, back to the start of the initiative order
> Scorp: Well I do that again.
> Head stays chopped of this time.

> Neither myself nor the Kakita Duelist had to lift a finger for the whole fight
> Scorp buddy got a cool ass magic war mask from the reassembled guardian too

> Villain Campaign, BESM
> Setting is a campy, Johnny Quest style metropolis with superheroes.
> My character is a scientist who fancies herself a wizard, rocket boots to fly, magnets that let her do telekinesis, that kinda stuff.
> Final showdown with my heroic rival.
> Whole arc has been me dealing with a massive inferiority complex and trying to get the hero to recognize me as her number one rival.
> Finally on the cusp of victory.
> Give big dramatic villain speech.
> We start combat.
> Hero attacks!
> Critfail my defense roll.
> Engage specialized system reroll, "If this reroll fails, something really bad happens."
> Critfail.

The hero not only sliced straight through my character's heart, but accidentally lost the grip on her sword, sending it flying into the reactor core for our camp science villain's base, which made it go critical and start up an explosion countdown.
I dropped to the floor in one round.
> "I guess I never really stood a chance after all."

The hero freaked out, grabbed my character, and teleported to an off-continent hospital while the rest of the party, in another part of the fortress, suddenly had to deal with the imminently exploding reactor that had been made from the heart of a dying star.

> My character wakes up.
> Gets the lowdown from the hero.
> Me: "You're too good for me. I think we should see other rivals."
> Hero: "No, you were awesome! It was me who screwed up!"
> Epilogue is like the weirdest breakup ever.

So, what, it has self-correcting time paradoxes? Is it Futurama?

Thanks user

Have a fun pic as payment

Way to try to sound smart, faggot. The real issue here is that at that range, ski-mask will be caught in the shrapnel even if it went off next to the ninja.

>Dark Heresy
>Fucking pissed off a smurf
>about to gun down my Guardsman Veteran for "HERESY!!!!"
>Decide fuck it and charge him with all my grenades on my sling activated
>Get a critical fail at charge and get pimp slapped back
>Sling fell off and stuck to his arm
>He went boom
>I ded
>Win Win cause I fucking hated the GM with his bullshit

Shit realised this is a How the fuck story sorry I'll go back to my story folder.

It wasn't exactly a fight, more like an assassination that went particularly well.
>Hunter The Vigil with God machine stuff
>Party is a pair of college students, a doomed booknerd and a literal chad thundercock, an Liberian immigrant and two former military shootbang guys, at least one of whom was a professional sniper
>They're currently trying to undoom the booknerd and get her disentangled from some bullshit plot that necessitates her to be sacrificed near the end of the year
>end up causing a sufficient ruckus to attract their very own personal angel dedicated to wiping most of them off the face of the planet, said angel has(through some admitted minmaxing sillyness) the ability to go faster than sound and frequently booms around the city searching for them
>After one too many close calls they do some research, manage to figure out how to kill it and throw together a plan to assassinate it
>They get together the things bane, they end up bribing a hotel manager to get a room cleared in an area overlooking a park and do some other unsavoury stuff to get prepped
>day comes, I'm expecting that even with the bane they'll get one, maybe two shots off before it does the thing and zips over to them and initiates a real combat
>Dice are rolled, 8 successes on 12 dice and with one hell of an elephant gun no less, the poor angel was instantly discorporated
I've gotta hand it to them, it was a REALLY good roll and they did a fair bit of prep work to get things so heavily in their favour.

Don't talk about Snake-Eyes like that ever again, millenial cuck

PCs were going to fight a Strigoi vampire kitted out to be a bitch to kill - dodging missiles, soaking up criticals, flight, regen, summoning zambinos - Bretonnian knight got two furies in a row and rolled high on their third attack too. Did so much damage the critical was off the charts.

So, DM built up that first major antagonist, a force sensitive gang leader. We came up with the plan - the jedi burst through the door, the soldier blows up the wall, I sneak in amidst the chaos.
Well, there was a miscommunication, and I've went in first. Since my character was a small and nimble twi'lek, she used the food elevator to get to the gangsters.
So, the elevator arrives, and the gang leader happens to be the closest to it. He looks inside, sees a twi'lek with a sniper rifle. I shit my pants, use destiny point and kill him with one shot.

>entering the third act of the campaign
>7th levek
>about to know who the bbeg really is and what's his plan
>his lieutenants ambush us
>one imposes a DC 12 paralysis to the guy with Fort 14
>nat1
>they use him as hostage to gather the rest of the party in one place
>AoE on the rest of PCs
>all fail rolls
>max damage
And that was it, one below average roll for every PC and the game died there
GM even got MAD at us

>stunned silence for the most overdone outcome in this kind of situations

You're the GM, it's not even a contest

Overdone? Guy said it was the last session of the game. Seems a good wrap up. Bit of an anti-climactic fight if that was what the GM was expecting, but a good end.

Ok found a actual Dissapointing fight story in my archives
>D&D Muderhobo extravaganza
>Be Kilrayun SPHESS MEHREEN *Cough* I meant Paladin Of The Emperor (Time Travel)
>Companions are a Human Sellsword travelling with this giant fuck because fuck it extra muscle a Elf rogue who was hiding her ears cause you know Eldar and a Dwarf I just pretended was a Squat
>Anyway BBEG is some Greedy Ass Dragon and a Lich
>We confront them in a hall of gold deep in a giant ass mountain dungeon we lost the Elf to (She got gangraped by Mimics)
>Dragon give's off huge speech and shit about why he's awesome and deserves all this treasure and shit while Lich prepares spell in the back
>Dragon gets ripped in half by Spell
>Lich absorbs dragon and becomes Dragon Lich God thing who gives a fuck
>Prepares to fuck us up while ranting about true power
>I shoot Him/Her/It with my Bolter while screaming "UNDEAD CHAOTIC HERETICAL DISGRACE!" and Roll a natural 20 plus a ton of other shit
>Lich goes down like a bitch from that one shot
>GM punched me in the face cause he was already sick of me destroying everything in the name of the emperor
>Forces teammates ingame to kill me
>I die like a bitch
>The End
Man Im shit at telling stories.

This is grand

I knew where this was going since the 5th line.

>First time DM (me)
>Party consists of a tiefling bard, elven sorcerer, human warlock, dwarven paladin, half-orc fighter, and human ranger
>Hired to clear out a cave of goblins that have been attacking a town
>Surprise! There are orcs, elven mages, and a human noble here too. Better find out what's going on
>Nah, we head back to town and rest.
>Decide I can't let their intrusion into the caves go unpunished
>Orc Warlord, a bodyguard Orc, and a dozen or so goblins attack the town
>Party cleans up the goblins, as expected
>Sees orc warlord for the first time
>This fight was supposed to see where they're at, if I need to tone things down for the rest of the campaign, or ramp them up
>bard gets top of initiative order somehow
>immediately charms warlord.
>In turn, immidiately nat20's his own bodyguard
>Fight was supposed to be the highlight of the night, lasts about 3 rounds

They also defeated the human boss by just heating up his armor. I was not prepared for this level of bullshit.

I knew where that was going from the second word.

>playing a Space Marine in D&D when no one wanted you too
You were the problem.

I knew where that was going from the first letter.

>Man Im shit at telling stories.

No shit, the literally zero punctuation made it a chore to read in the first place. It also sounds like your DM let your party get away with waaaay too much during character creation, holy fuck.

Why on earth would anyone let someone play a fucking space marine in a D&D setting? What was he expecting? What were ANY OF YOU expecting?

I knew where this was going from OP's post.

I knew where this was going from OP's post number.

That fight wouldn't have happened if the Reiklander didn't shoot it.

I knew where this was going when I woke up this morning covered in cold sweat and my own tears.

I knew where this was going when I fell asleep last night covered in semen and shame.

There's times I wonder if anons who complain about "muh cliches in TRPGs" even play TRPGs. Almost all of the shit they claim to be overdone I never see.

Foolish user, nobody on Veeky Forums has ever played a TTRPG.

My friend and I were just learning 3.5 / PF
>very low level, maybe level 1 or 2
>CE catfolk barbarian prowling around a hideout looking for a stolen necklace, with a very weak NPC (lvl 1 mite) assisting him for various reasons
>enters a room with torches on the walls, huge wooden table in center
>sleeping goblin in a chair at the other side of the room
>first thing he does is light the table on fire using a torch from the wall
>goblin wakes up, and realizes he's surrounded, a mite coming in from his left and a catfolk from his right. In front of him is a big burning table, wall behind him
We were very new, so this is probably an impossibility, but it was so funny to us in the moment it really didn't matter
>goblin realizes he needs to tell his boss what's going on (hobgoblin higher level than PC and NPC)
>attempts to escape with a risky plan
>"the goblin walks up to the burning table, and attempts to use all of his strength to launch himself over the table towards the door"
We didn't know the appropriate DC for this, so we divided it into a strength check and an acrobatics check, one to see if he launches, the other to see if he lands. We also made an arbitrary roll to see if he'd light ablaze in the process
>20, 2, 1
>"with a battlecry, the goblin places both hands on the burning table, lifts himself halfway up, and springboards into the air through the flames. You hear a scream and a wet crumple as the body hits the floor"
>no struggling, dead on impact
>laughed for a long time

>kitten is angry, kitten is offended.

The Paladin hitsquad had caught up to the party, ready to deal out justice for their wrong doings and seize the evil artifact they had been using recklessly. It was going to be a tough fight, the Paladin leader planning to share his smite powers with his entire party, casters hiding behind a phalanx of heavily armored fighters.

The new player in the group, who had not been present until then, was a pure Sorcerer. He made a pit under the Paladin and one of the guards, exposing the casters to the rogues ranged sneak attacks. He made more pits on following rounds.

The battle was mostly just the players dropping rocks on the people in the many pits.

No, fuck off if you're going to be like that.

>sent in to deal with a cultist leader
>one for every race
>already killed 3
>this one's an Elf woman
>party's debating how to open the wide double doors
>I've been stuck in a trapped room, gave myself up so the others could progress, finally freed myself
>I stomp up and fling the doors open, they were never locked
>Elf gets offended and threatens me
>walk up, visibly exhausted (mostly mentally), and diplomacy the fuck out of her
>she turns informant and leaves the cult, only acting like she's in for now as a cover, but directs us to the others

Not everything in D&D has to be a fight, friends. Also, before you worry yourself stupid about trying to lockpick/magic a door open, make sure it's not already unlocked. My first action was to simply test the door, something my party hadn't done.

Oh, and the reason this was an anticlimactic fight was because she was statted as a high-level wizard, ready with a ton of tricks, and I skipped the fight altogether. I got to see her sheet later, and... Well. It wouldn't have been easy, for sure.

>Veeky Forums rejecting storytiem

Man, this place has gone to shit.

We're not rejecting storytime, we're rejecting people who ask us if we want storytime. Just fucking storytime already.

>Boss comes in through a door
>The door has been rigged with so many different traps that if God himself walked through it he would die
>The boss dies before even half the traps go off
>End of encounter, move on to next room, avoiding our traps
>Surprise boss tries to come through the door after us
>He dies too
>End of encounter, mission complete

>playing deathwatch
>Everyone playing some sort of specialist
>Captain's, apothacarys, chaplains, a chapter master
>Dude playing the chapter master is a weeb
>Cm of the Rising Sons Veeky Forums chapter
>Couple other rando chapters
>Then there's the chaplain
>He's from his own snowflake chapter that's all stealth and espionage based
>They are nearly extinct and only a few are capable of wearing power armor
>To boot, they end up going full tinfoil hat after a while due to geneseed defects
>Cork boards with strong connecting pictures and newspaper clippings, codes in the alphabet soup, that sort of thing
>Eventually they will bolt and make a little den with security feeds coming in from everywhere until they NEET to death
>Chaplain has to balance this out by being 100% chill
>Down to earth
>Bro, there aren't spy satellites communicating with your service studs
>Chaplain is borderline heretical
>DM runs with this and keeps setting up conflict b/w weeb cm and hippie chaplain
>Comes to a head at a temple to emps they're supposed to clear of orks
>Weeb marine is sitting there praying, being honorabu and shit
>Chaplain walks in munching on a sandwich, chilling,orks are dead
>Weeb cm spergs because muh respect 4emprah
>Challenges chaplain to death match
>Both are excessively powerful melee builds
>Chaplain throws his scalding hot grilled cheese, rolls well, hits weeb square in the face, temporarily stunning him
>Weeb critical fails pulling burning cheese sandwich from his eyes
>Chaplain throws cruzius arcanum
>Critical success
>Dms sides have entered orbit
>DM says that the power mace smacked the weeb dead in the cheesy face, roll for stun
>Chaplain succeeds
>Walks over
>Picks up weapon
>Picks up sandwich
>Continues eating and asks if weeb wants help up
>Weeb commits sudoku

> Me: "You're too good for me. I think we should see other rivals."
kek. Definitely worth a (you)

You favor the odds of talking your way out of shit with a vampire? They're a bit...twitchy. Especially Strigoi.

>GM punched me in the face

This definitely happened.

>DH
>Party investigating cult in a typical PC manner, kicking down the doors proceeding to 'rob' the place, start making their way up stairs, and make it to the 5th floor
>Party member 1 uses prey sense goggles to look up dark stairwell
>Brood Lord
>Crit fail fear, Crit fail again, has a fucking heart attack, burns fate to slip into coma rather than straight up dying
>Remaining 3 players are (only mildly) confused why their sniper just died
>Party member 2 puts on goggles, looks up
>Fear failed, proceed immediately to 'run the fuck away' do not pass go, do not collect $200
>Remaining 2 players are now thoroughly confused, and now goggleless, totally unaware as death incarnate is slowly slinking down from above
>Finally just a mere 30 meters away from the party, it comes into light
>Party member 3 (surprise surprise) fails his fucking fear test, cannot move towards it, cannot fight it
>Proceeds to grab comatosed party member 1, leap out of the 5th story window and fire his grapnel
>Naturally it jammed and they both crashed into a fountain below
>Player 4, does NOT fail fear test decides to throw a krak, rolls well but still doesn't pierce its DR
>Follows suit and leaps from 5th story window into the other two below, knocking player 3 unconscious
>Suped up on drugs, grabs both of the incapacitated players under his arms and straight up sprints for half an hour to the safe house, passing player 2 on the way there.

All this took around 15 seconds of narrative time and one game round.

Wouldn't you?

>Dark Heresy
>Be god-emperor fearing psyker
>Enemy psyker appears among a bunch of cultists
>Get told "Handle it."
>Oh.
>Okay.
>Proceed to ace every single one of my rolls, bullying the unarmed pyromancer to the floor with telekinesis, keeping her from getting close enough to use her powers effectively
>Her cronies dead, she begs for mercy
>Proceed to walk over and laspistol a hole right through her head
>"There, I handled it."
It was so hilariously, implausibly one-sided that I think my GM decided to throw a pair of Bloodthirsters at us out of spite.

>assuming everyone is as stupid as your party
>assuming every encounter can be solved with diplomacy

I honestly don't get that latter one, really. Diplomacy isn't an attack roll. There's not some magical number you have to hit that makes everyone listen to you.

>In an Ars Magica game, we were the frontline vanguard of an expansionist army conquering new territory, and being unpleasantly surprised to discover the local warlords are dragons. Not normal Ars Magica dragons, but Dungeons and Dragons dragons - giant fuck-off flying murder lizards who are also absurdly powerful wizards.
>One gets the drop on us in the wilderness, separated from our army.
>Ungood.
>It wins initiative.
>Doubleplusungood.
>It flies into the air, out of range of most of our attacks, and starts to cast a spell to summon a tornado of fire to roast our shit.
>Horribly flubs it's casting roll. ''Create-Fire-Long Range'' becomes ''Destroy-Air-Self Range''.
>All the air in a cylinder around it suddenly vanishes.
>Wings can no longer hold it aloft.
>Plummets to the ground, crit fails it's soak roll against the falling damage.
>Breaks it's neck on impact.
>And there was much rejoicing.jpeg

That's an issue too. But of course, the only way that would even happen is if he was cooking the grenade (which it doesn't look like he's doing in the image, but I digress), which is a very good way of blowing your hand off. What he should be doing is not using a fucking grenade in this situation. This is what guns are for.

I'll talk about Ski-Mask in whatever fashion I like, thanks.

>DM uses app on phone for random crit effects
Now I'm curious, which app?

>Dark Heresy, I'm GM
>Party runs into nobleman's room, he's a heretic
>he draws his power sword and his guards kill themselves on a rune in the back, which will make a warp portal open in five turns
>party loses all their melee weapons due to parrying a power sword
>assassin fires into a crowded melee and puts their AdMech doctor into dangerous crit level
>Nobleman is only buying time, and is not attempting to kill or disarm the party
>portal eventually opens and the cleric unloads a flamer
>in a crowded private office
>made of real, terran wood
>Nobleman escapes while everyone runs out on fire
>half the party is killed

I just wanted to give them a nemesis to track down.

Should have read "not attempting to kill, only disarm the party"

He had both iCrit and iFumble. It wasn't as interesting as we would have hoped with the exception of that time and when we seemingly vaporized a sphinx with a critical acid splash but really, we sent it like 30 seconds forward in time, catching us all off guard and killing half the party while we had our stuff put away and were healing ourselves.

>>Eventually they will bolt and make a little den with security feeds coming in from everywhere until they NEET to death
>>Chaplain has to balance this out by being 100% chill
>>Down to earth
>>Bro, there aren't spy satellites communicating with your service studs
>>Chaplain is borderline heretical
I fucking like this idea a lot more than I probably should.

> Me: "You're too good for me. I think we should see other rivals."
> Hero: "No, you were awesome! It was me who screwed up!"
> Epilogue is like the weirdest breakup ever.

Okay, so this was in a 3.5 campaign I ran. Party level was in the upper teens. They needed to get a McGuffin that had been installed in the brain of the Tarrasque. Because that's the kind of thing old kobold wizards do. Also, the kobold wizard had sealed his pet Tarrasque in a lair deep in the bowels of the prison plane of Carceri. The party had previously gone to the kobold's lair and recovered the manual that explained how to operate the kobold's portal to get to the lair. In fact, they found three manuals with conflicting instructions. But we'll get back to that in a minute.

So this Tarrasque was no ordinary Tarrasque. In addition to having substantially improved stats, it also had a host of other features: fire breath, eye lazers, the works. Hell, just being in the same room as him was hot enough to start taking fire damage. Anywhere near melee range and his heat aura would melt your face. This was a Gestalt Tarrasque with as many class levels as it had racial hit dice, of which it had many, not to mention a few of the more obnoxiously OP templates out there.

So about those manuals. First one:
>To activate the portal, first point your left hand at it. Then return your hand to your side. Point your left hand again at the portal, then perform the diagrammed somatic gestures. Gyrate your abdomen, and finally rotate in place 360 degrees.

The other two versions of the manual gave the same instructions, but referenced the right hand and left foot, respective. So the party tried each approach, and found that the portal turned different colors, depending on which set of instructions they followed.

The wizard stepped through the portal, and it turns out they guessed correctly. He was at the entrance of the Super Tarrasque's lair. He immediately felt the scorching heat aura, saw the creature, and bugged out.

Out of curiosity, they checked where the other manuals would lead them. So they redid the portal instructions, and one of them stepped through.

1/2

Continued.

So he steps through the portal and is transported right into the belly of the Super Tarrasque. He doesn't come back out, so the rest of the party goes in after him.

Inside the belly of the beast, the party quickly realized they have the spells necessary to effectively neutralize the damage being dealt by the Tarrasque's (admittedly quite impressive) digestive system while slowly whittling his health down with their daggers. There was plenty of room in there for the whole party, so they just had a nice stab fest while the Super Tarrasque's array of impressive abilities were rendered useless.

They didn't climb out of his stomach until he was well and truly dead. Or at least as close to dead as a Tarrasque, Super or otherwise, gets. They carved out their McGuffin, and promptly got the hell out of Dodge.

Meanwhile, I sat there sighing, well and truly stumped. The players got one over on me. They laid low my glorious uber monster without so much as a scratch. This is why I felt no remorse whatsoever for subjecting them to Tucker's Kobolds.

Continue

>Playing homebrewed sci-fi game set in a universe from a series of books that I hadn't read but everyone else in my group had and wanted to do, so was just along for the ride.
>FTL travel is monopolized by this enigmatic spider species.
>They don't seem to do much beyond run things and make bank doing it, almost never seem to talk to people, super-autistic.
>Anyway, we're a number of investigators/thugs working for an interstellar business empire.
>Our firm starts running into trouble in this cluster of worlds whose systems are divided between two different species, and there's a lot of cultural cross-pollinization between the two as well as some actual tension, as the Spider dudes generally only let what they consider legitimate governments carry military weapons through the stars, and now you have two competing empires both with warships in the same system.
>And this weird cult has sprung up along the border, and they start causing trouble.
>We initially just start out trying to protect our business interests, but eventually infiltrate the cult in its entirety on behalf of both alien governments who have interests in the area.
>Lure the leaders of this cabal to [planet] where we have an ambush set up, bring in some soldier buddies to help us out.
>Soldiers have super-sonic rifles, and are apparently genetically enhanced. We have a "fight" with the cultists and a few bodyguards, but every round we get a roll, and 4 more of them drop because our buddies apparently never miss even when sniping from 2 miles away.

It was a dumb as shit ending to a good campaign.

Just about any fight i ever had on too low TL or too high TL, GURPS.

>TL3, aka early middle age
>human soldier A cladded from head to toe in fine mail and a two handed warhammer
>human soldier B in layered cloth hauberk with pieces of mail of the body with axe and shield
>fight starts
>A stand still and chooses a defensive grip
>B advances and gives a swing
>A falls back a step while trying to dodge it
>A is sucessfull
>A gives a defensive swing with his superior reach
>A misses
>B does a step and a swing at the face
>B misses
>A does a steab backwards and ready his heavy weapon
>B does a step and a defensive swing
>A falls back a step while trying to dodge it
>A is sucessfull
>A does a push kick at B and hits
>B tries to dodge but fail
>B fail other things and fall down
>B is stunned for a second
>A swings at B skull
>A hits and does 2d6+2 IMP damage for a 10 total
>A get through B skullcap but not through the padding
>B takes 3 crushing damage to the head
>B pass some tests and doesn't pass out
>A tries to pull his weapon but it is stuck on the skullcap
>B under shock because damage swing at A foot and hit
>A try to dodge at -4 because he doesn't want to let go of his weapon
>A get hit
>B gives 2d6-1[1d6+3] cutting damage to its feet for a total of 11
>B get through A footwear and fucks up his feet
>A fail some more shit and get knocked out of his feet
>A gets a hard fall of about one yard while wearing 63.3lbs of armor
>A falls over his right arm for [because hard surface]2*(HP+1/4 total armor[based on wheight] HP)*Velocity[5]. aka 2d6
>A rolls for damage for 12
>A right arm breaks
>A fail HT and pass out
>A get killed by being repeatedly hit in the face with an axe

k