Roasties and crypto

>roastie in my class asks if I have a job.
>I always wear flip flops everyday and the same shorts/t shirt.
>n-no
>"how do you afford things user lol"
>tell her I don't buy anything.
>asks me why I never wear nice clothes.
>"I don't want to waste money on clothes"
>2 months later get my first car as present for birthday from mom.
>2015 BMW 2 series, white exterior, red interior.
>roastie in class asks I how afforded that.
>don't want to say mommy bought it for me.
>tell her I trade in "digital assets"
>"huh? Like stocks?"
>heh yeah I'm a stock broker but not for stocks.
>realise I'm making no sense, start to sweat and panic.
>huh what do you mean user?
>tell her I own crypto.
>try to explain it to her.
>"lol that sounds shady and like a scam"
>asks me how much I made.
>tell her around 200k since January.
>wow user I didn't know you were rich.
>now she always talks to me and acts nicer around me.
>gave me her number out of the blue on Friday.

What should I do biz? Anyone have similar stories?

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pump and dump her

This

Ask her rate.

post an actual pic related

You should fuck off to

>i actually read the bottle

Fuck you, was going to post this.

Nice LARP, kid.

>I have a crypto related name on okcupid
>I match with a girl and send her a message
>she asks about the meaning of my name and I explain to her that I have some money on BTC
>Oh really? Wow user, that's great. I heard in the news recently, it's worth $15k now!
>We chit chat a little longer
>A few days later she says "wow, it's worth 17k now! by the way, do you have (instant messaging app)?
>Give her my app ID
>Okay user, I'll add you tonight!
>BTC dips to 13k because of the futures release, she doesn't add me
>Today, 3 days later, it goes back to 17k
>"oh sorry user, I've been a little busy recently"

Don't worry, OP. I believe you

Heres an actual photo of her. She sent me this.

Pump and dump the gold-digging bitch

I already go on r9k.

pump and dump

do NOT get stuck bag holding

dont kiss her on the mouth either

enjoy raising tyrones kids

that's the face of a whore

a 2 series?

Jesus fucking christ, just give her that piece of shit car, or trade in for a KIA, you may have to pay the difference at the KIA shop

PUMP
DUMP
WAIT FOR DIP
PUMP AGAIN BROTHER

suck on them titties and then bail on her end of semester.

Fuck just make sure you don't give her a dime. Max it should cost to smash is a semi nice dinner.

>cross on her neck
Good thing too, this hoe really needs Jesus

oh my god look at those milkers, and that face. If you do not try to have sex with her you are confirmed hohmasekcsual

She is probably just curious and want to learn about it.

shes gonna figure out you're poor soon enough.

kek

>be an unkempt asocial poorfaggot
>get a nice present from parents
>larp as an eccentric millionaire
>people take my larp seriously
>WTF ROASTIES
Exciting story, OP, keep us updated.

jesus, women are cancer.

Holy fucking shit she looks so soulless. Dude this is an automaton of a human, just use her for her body.

Milk her udders dry, don't cream in the pussy.

Post pictures of her asshole on Veeky Forums.

let me get this straight.
she talks to you, within the minutes of both conversations she's asking you about money.
then when you tell her you're crypto-rich, SHE gives you her phone number.

Unless you're a CHAD, which i don't think you are, girls don't give out their phone number.

If you're at a decent school - upper mid-tier to ivy, she's probably getting a "husband degree".

Fuck her, but make sure you buy the condom.
Make sure you rise out the condom when done (flush it if it's at her house).

if she's expecting a ride in the BMW tell her no animals allowed in your vehicle and that she can pretend you gave her a ride if she asks permission, meet at spot get sexual with kissing, grabbing, walk her to mens room lock it and get bj refuse to talk to her again and laugh at her when she gets upset

>implying she will do any of this

she's not gonna give it up till OP buys her shit

DONT HODL

> mfw /pol9k/ was right all along
> mfw real happiness is being a financially independent bachelor who shitpost
We hodl our bags, but there is no one to hodl us

Kek, I love you Veeky Forums

wrong, you just be assumptive meet at a place be physical, hold her arm walk her to men's room etc. if at any point she doesn't want it just laugh at her and if she's mad she'll leave who cares

just do never spend $ or give her a bmw ride (she'll definitely scratch/ruin interior/exterior or some other fucked up shit to show how much of a mistake it was to associate with her)

>We hodl our bags, but there is no one to hodl us
deep bro deep
>sheds tear

I believe that there are good women. But American girls are strange. That girl I matched with is American for some reason. I have my distance set to places nearby me only so she liked me first otherwise she wouldn't show up on the match thingy because I'm not in the US.

she is a lost soul

she needs structure and the firm hand of discipline

>telling anyone what you made
You fucked up. My friends have known I'm into crypto since 2012, when they asked me recently I just laughed it off, said I made some bad trades and was only a few thousand dollars up.

You're assuming OP is not a complete fucking beta.

He's not going to do any of that shit and she isn't going to fuck/suck/handydandy him, especially if he won't let her ride in his car.

Kek'ed realy hard at this

what is this image.

ok lady, you're still not allowed in my BMW-maybe if you weren't so annoying or weird

hey I'll see you at the mall tonight there's an opening run of some stupid Supreme wear and I need you to help me, it's a per person limit, then after I'll think about letting u ride

mall -> mens room -> ignore her after, laugh hysterically when she gets mad in class

Still assuming incorrectly OP is not a complete fucking beta.

Just how underage are you?

>Not knowing t.A.T.u

No wonder everyone's a virgin here.

>dubs confirm
>kek approves

what else did you expect, user

>tfw gf is just as interested in crypto
>tfw making comfy gains together

youtube.com/watch?v=8mGBaXPlri8

This
/thread

>tfw gf gave me $100 in March to buy ETH with

first person who believe in me

is that hitler in the background?

FPBP

hahahaha holy shit it is

>don't want to say mommy bought it for me.
>tell her I trade in "digital assets"
Wait
just to clear some thing sup
You don't actually own any crypto or make any money off of it?

Impressive observation skills

I do own crypto. I've never sold it or bought anything with it though. She knew I didn't have a job so I lied and said I bought it with money I made from selling crypto.

and DRUIDS guy to the left

Shes using a towel as a shower curtain user, i wouldnt even pump n dump

also we have autism

I never understood why girls blow random dudes in bathrooms how alpha do you have to be

wow lewd she want you'r seed

who is the girl in the right? fucking love her

>Fuck her, but make sure you buy the condom.
Make sure you rise out the condom when done (flush it if it's at her house).
Some tinder whores will actively seek out a beta bux after they miss a period so they can try guilting you into thinking you’re the daddy. not saying shes preggo but damn her tits are firm

if its 200k like you say
impregnate her
every
year
for the next 10 years.

She is looking for resources for her offspring
Probably doesn't even know it on a conscious level
Probably thinking about new shoes
and getting fucked by the guy who is going to buy those shoes.
None the less on cellular level what she really is doing is selecting a mate to produce and raise her children with.

If your image is accurate she seems nice enough
Make white babies user.

I can literally see her tooth filling from too much cum

Wow she sounds like a cunt! Stay away from crypto diggers!

Did you notice the cross?
Look i get it
The world is filled with roasties
and there are no tradmaidens
Well be a man
Accept reality
You got lemons lads
Make lemonade
Roasties arn't feminists nor are they sterile
And this roastie is at least a Christian
You got something to patrol her with
Make white babies

Shes a gold digger tho lol, user would have no further interaction if he hadn’t mentioned his value

gold digging is a biological imperative to ensure the survival of her eggs

>Anyone have similar stories?

>go to bank
>teller is 10 lbs too heavy to be a qt
>says we were in the same college class
>she sees my balance (about 150k)
>go back to bank next week
>up 20k on stock market so balance is 170k
>same teller
>she's real flirty
>talks in a real high pitch and giggles a lot

funny thing was I was withdrawing cash from the bank to buy crypto

>wearing a cross means she's christian

yeah sure and I go to church every sunday

...

>increase in stock porfolio reflect on your bank balance
Is this a larp or some amazing bank company that does that?

women don't feel love
they're predators who predate on resources, that's as close to "love" as they will get

tell her to fuck off.

fucking gold digging cunt.

he's larping

I use td bank

the account summary shows the values of my cash, credit and brokerage accounts

And here's the good version youtube.com/watch?v=-F-JfWqMG6g

Sounds like she only wants you for your money and not your passion. Abandon ship.

My bf doesn't like me trading crypto because it makes him nervous even though i make tons of money, but he likes my passion for it and enjoys Veeky Forums memes with me.

This is both hilarious and exactly what you should do

>never post on fb
>go to trade meeting
>wear suit like everybody else
>new guy uploads selfie with me accidentally in it
>captions with big gains
>15 minutes later
>"Oh hey user we haven't talked for so long let's go out"

>my bf
Show tits with timestamp or gtfo whore

have a very similar strategy user

>be me
>19
>college freshman
>own my own website design/social media management business, among others
>recently bought picrel, a 2008 Porsche 987 S
>the last owner replaced the "cayman s" badge with the "PORSCHE" badge, so normies all think its a zillion dollar 911
>added 911 turbo spoiler
>larp in a 16.5k car

now for the fun part

>my dad's the in-house announcer for my local NHL team
>gets free club tickets to each game
>throw a set of those on your snap story, and you've got a date in 10 mins
>pull up in aforementioned 987 s
>"whoa user how did you convince your parents to buy you a 'porsh'?"
>I didn't; I bought it
>wow I didn't know you're rich
>yeah, [then go with]: "ever heard of bitcoin?" or "I trade crypto" or something along those lines
>get vip treatment at game
>invite girl to upscale apartment after the game, which I rent for ridiculously cheap but is kept REALLY nice

this is guaranteed pussy

>Acquiring resources for her offspring
>Gold digger
There is zero difference here between the two.

Also you are not an old faggot
Gold diggers date and marry old faggots not lads in school.
She is just a woman doing what women do.
Think of it this way.
You innatly like the boobs like the skin like the ass of a tight lass right?
Well women are the same way
Just instead of tight lass they innately like lad who can provide.
If you hate women for being women then you got some shit to work out i can't help you with.
But what I think don't. You just got memed by cultural marxim about women and thier nature.
stop that shit
and fullfill your duty as a man to your race and make white babies.

I live in the bay area, and there is one sentence that gets them wet instantly: "I own bitcoin since 2015"

Do you live in Minnesota?

Tampa. In college in Tallahassee, though.

we all did user we all did

Wow Op here. I live in Tampa and go to school here. And I'm 20 and a sophmore.

>>my dad's the in-house announcer for my local NHL team

can you post something in /hoc/?

Pump and dump

Did you go to high school down here?
academy girls fall for this every time js

the fuck is that? And what would you want me to post?

LOL check the bottle label

We are indeed oldfags. Sweet summer boys will never experience watching these two broads in their prime

on /sp/ it's the nhl general

you must have some lightning shit that's not available to the general public