Elf-Human alliances

You're looking for DnD 5th Edition, where Half Elf is literally the best race in the game unless Variant Humans are allowed.

Most races that aren't elves are inferior to elves in most "standard" DnD settings, at least lore-wise. That's why a large number of people here on Veeky Forums hate elves so much. They live forever, they're the best at magic, have the most advanced/peaceful society, have the best warriors, have their own super special elf weapons, are the finest artisans and craftsmen, ect. ect. They're the Mary Sue race, unless you add some homebrew twist to them that brings them more down to earth. 99% of GMs fuck this up though in their attempts to be "original" and make the race even more broken, or make them the useless downtrodden forest-savages/slave race who nobody wants to play ever.

That depends on the kind of magic.

Elves could be better because of

1. Having senses able to detect magic better. easier to manipulate what you can actually sense

2. Biology. If magic is energy they might just have a Biology well suited towards it.

3. Mysticism. Their advanced age allows them to grow in mystic understanding. a path that requires experience and their long lifetime allows them much time to gather experience and contemplate on it.

Furthermore there is nothing about magic which means you require advanced institutions. Magical rites, conversations with demons or even just your great grandmothers grimoire might be just what you need.

Also to look at this from another viewpoint, there are plenty of purported sorcerers in real life and many more in myth and legend. Very few of these people required any kind of institution advanced, expensive or otherwise.

Oh look, another story that isn't even a fucking story, but a long infodump about places and people I have no emotional investment in, doing shit that I have no reason to care about. For fuck's sake, it reads like a Let's Play of the most unbalanced 4X game ever. Learn to write, you fucking hacks.

Come on Veeky Forums give 'em to me!

Best Elf here.

If you're not reading Dungeon Meshi already, now's a perfect time to start.

...

Not sure if Dark Elfs count

I thought I had a bunch more, but this seems to be the last one I've got on this laptop.

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

No the elves naturally longer lifespan would eventually push them into all positions of power due to their greater experience, this plus their natural affinity with magic would easily lead to a two tiered society where humans occupy all the shitty roles elves don't want whilst elves sit at the top of their emerald tower.

For this reason the vile elf must be suppressed and rooted out from every corner.

Our "cooperation" would lead to our inevitable downfall.

>WHY IN THE GODS' NAMES DID YOU USED THAT DRAWTHREAD MEME OF MODERN MILITARY SOLDIERS WITH ELVES???

Why not? it's a cool concept.

>he does not want to work as a civilian contractor protecting elves from orcs and black people as they travel through the forest.

>serving my thrid tour in the elf lands to help bolster friendly units
>they send us in with our fucking MRAPs, LAPVs, and even IFVs
>other dudes roll out in freaking main battle tanks, but mostly its the one going to the badlands to crush out those fucking orcs
>finally get to our AO and its an elven town with some strategic importance in terms of supply lines and logistics
>all the joes are excited to see elf women, even the female soldiers are eager to meet some elf guys. but im married and could care less about flirting with an elf
>pop out my IFV turret and start cracking into a MRE because for some reason I thought skipping breakfast was a good idea
>suddenly some little elf kid clambers on top of my vehicle
>drag the little bastard off of the vents before her robes get clogged into the grate
>starts gibbering at me in her language and messing with my shit
>give her my pack of sugar munchies to keep her away from me
>Sits on top of the driver hatch
>driver mad because that elf kid's feet are blocking the vehicle optics
>popa hatch and swings it away
>elf child has own floating seat while it eats the sugar munchies i gave her
>look over at dismounted soldiers
>men already fucking about with the women while some girl soldiers also fucking around with some elf guys
>hear chittering behind me
>gaggle of elf children peeking over rear laughing at me
>i honestly hope we're not gonna stay here for too long

>be me, tank operator rolling out in my MBT while also assigned in a convoy protecting some high elf noble people
>Convoy is also being accompanied by these wood elves
>tree dewllin' archer babes just started tying sticks and bushes to our MRAPs, LAPVs and one of the tanks, including mine
>alot of the vehicles now look like giant bushes with guns sticking out
>The wood elves sit on the barrels or turrets while riding atop the vehicles
>others will hop around vehicle to vehicle, because elves, they just work like that
>Those wood elf archers keep raiding our MREs for the BBQ sauce according one of the guys riding with them
>We ran across an Orc patrol
>Wood elves just stay behind for now while we hammer the green skinned savages with heavy weapons fire and they watch the show
>me and the other tank operators are told to stand by and wait for authorization to shoot at 'em with 120mm shells
>company leaders tells tank operators to use only heavy machine gun fire, for now
>finally I get some action as i smoke those orc savages with the coaxial MG
>i hear one of the high elf nobles in the comms asking whats going till one of the company leaders just told 'em to calm their tits and everything's fine
>Cease fire echos on comms
>wood elves run out to kill orcs that're out of range for the vehicles
>watching them via my tank optics
>well i have to say, these wood elves are good archers, better than when I was doing archery at academy
>one of the elf nobles we're escorting pipes up in the comms, said elf guy who's now piping up in comms is a wizard an senses some scary shit
>turns out this orc patrol's some sort of ambush as he says he dectects some magic siege weaponry from the distance
>company leaders tell us lookout the area till one of the guys in an IFV Mobile Gun System sees two magic siege weapons from a distance trying to aim at us

>we ain't having none of that shit as company leaders tell us tank operators we're finally authorized to use our 120mm main guns
>the guys operating a mobile gun system take aim and shoot at the first siege weapon as they hit their mark and first siege weapon blows up
>i decide take my turn, aim at the second siege engine i see, i load up tank shell and shoot
>and bam! second siege engine destroyed
>all the surviving ocs who were operating those siege weapons and not blown up by the main guns gather up and decide to charge us all in a last ditch effort
>wood elf archers line up and aim their bows and arrows and loose up their arrows as they rain down on the charging orcs
>we decide to also help clear out as i and the other tank guys blow those green skinned fucks to little itty-bitty bits with the main tank gun
>cease fire echos through comms again all those orc fucks are dead
>convoy now proceeds to destination for these elf nobles, the next allied city
>those wood elf archers climb back at the vehicles, one wood elf babe i so happen to have a slight crush in climbs up the tank im in
>asks my tank commander if she could ride along with us, and my tank commander says yes but she has to deal with squeezing in with us
>we proceed as while im driving she moves next to me and tells me
>"Nice shooting back there, handsome."
>wow, okay... freakin' elves
>decide to focus in current mission as we all drive by the orc retards we just gunned down and i drive over the still struggling orcs on the ground and squish 'em with the tank treads
>and thus is the life of working with this elf alliance

please do not write anything ever again.

Oi mate, found a 40K version of that pic if it helps.

In most cases elves are just magical beings inherently and the things humans have to learn come mostly naturally to them. They simply have an innate knack for it.

That said, a civilization can be extremely advanced without looking like ours. If we had access to druids, magical healers, etc, you can bet human society and technology would look very different. We'd have different needs and wants - we probably wouldn't have discovered penicillin, for example, because we'd have no use for it. Healing magic does everything it does 100x better.

Finally, most elves are not really wood elves. Typical elves are pic related - the elder race of warrior kings and ancient sages that mastered the things everyone else is struggling with centuries ago, and isn't in charge solely because their WIS score is so collectively high that they see the futility of things like empire.

>tfw no warhammer high elf waifu.

is this from a vidya cinematic, or just some gross sfm thing?

can i just say i love how pro elf the polemic of Veeky Forums is becoming. Allahu Elfbar

What are some good twists on elves to bring them down to the other race's level? Honestly curious about this.

My elf-like have a weakness to smoke, which is relevant since the setting is in the process of industrialization. They're behind on tech because they don't use coal at all so they have no machinery.

...

I pride myself in being an obnoxious shitposter for years for making this possible and turning more and more people towards the elf side of life.

>implying they'd be Jihad-shits

Nah way user, elves would likely be westernized/westernified or are post-westphalian type of people, state, and civilization that'd all be Democracy and Western Values Fuck Yeah.

And would shit on things that're "archaic" and not on par with the civilized Western world.

Right, because long lifespans, arrogance and a reliance on magic are all conducive to a highly progressive civilization.

Don't get me wrong, user, I love elves, but they'd be archaic and old-fashioned as hell. They probably wouldn't be into martyrdom at all either, though. Long lifespans don't really lead ton people wanting to sacrifice themselves for anything.

You really asking for Spees Elf pics user? I can dump some pics for you later if so.

Not by this same-face artist.

I gots a feeling that elves, mostly and especially High Elves, would be Western Allies for any Westphalia-type or fictional American-expy type of nation and government.

Mostly that type of government and nation would try sucking up or befriending High Elf-land to get some sweet insight and knowledge and easy access to all that sweet magic knowledge.

The befrieding and sucking up would compose of giving High Elf-land's government and its people technologies, all that sweet-ass modern day amenities and treats like maybe chocolate and electric grids. And ofcourse for the elven militaries; they'd be given guns, equipment, hardware and vehicles too. All of which the fictional-America type nation would teach the elves how to use against the enemies of the elves.

Magic is more like philosophy than science.

Got into d&d with 5e at my summer camp we were all metamancing faggots so we all went half elf. Fucking hell it sucked. Luckily we all chose good classes so it was different. Our dm was kinda pissed we went all meta shit

...

That's from the old (2007?) cinematic. If it were Source Film Maker, the quality would've been higher, clearer and better.

Its High Noon Time!

I don't thing that works well at all, and in fact it could end up being terrible. Kinda destroys any alien and otherworldly vibe the elves could have. it would work better for races that are more mundane like halflings or dwarves would work better, while for elves a trickier situation would be better. If elves just think like humans, make them humans.

>elves and humans aren't allies in his setting
You're a buffoon and a jackanapes.

>that image
GATE much?

The setting I used for my last several books has no formal alliances, since the planet was so fucked up after the Collapse that people just cohabited until a formal treaty would have been completely pointless. It helps that the Pantheon actively step in and slap around people who start causing racial animus.

I think that is dreamy thinking. Paternalism and tradition would reign in a society with the elders possessing centuries of experience.

Feel free to write them as per your post in your setting, but I see even the hippy, ruled by council, type of elf societies as being quite reactionary and less demotic than a liberal (lowercase l) human republic of good guys and friendship.

In my current game, the DM has written them as ruled by a magocracy of druids controls govt functions (imagine chinese empire bureaucracy run by druids and preserving the nation replacing loyalty to an emperor as an organizing ideal), but in times of great war they can empower the highest military commander to become absolute dictator.

the first time i played dnd four years ago, my char was an elf wizard. We are still playing that game. I am an elfaboo for sure.

Well like I said, I'd dump some spees elf pics if its ok.

I actually am thinking about blending Adventurer Sorcerer King domain system with some things from Birthright to make custom setting with collapsing human empire and fractured elves that kill each other but also have a hope for revival after years upon years of bloody civil wars and ethnic genocides.

Elves could be easily portrayed as conflicted in sort of classical DnD dillemmas: are they siding with "chaos" or "civillization"?

Also when you have a setting with beastmen and monsters that are all/most a byproduct of the experiments and horrible transformation magic of humans with other stuff (like orcs being a fusion of a hog/pig with human) elves can easily see humans as some sort of biological catalyst for all the evil, genetic time-bombs just waiting to suddenly go 1986 "Fly".

I'm toying with those idea, especially if I want to get "weird science" background to elves or like in those old french comics or "Thorgal", maybe as some originally extraterrestial beings made out of elements but evolving not like humans from primates, but say, from roe deers. (maybe conflict between elf ethnicities can be on such level: some split in evolution, maybe due magic/choice of habitat, some evolved more lynx like, some kept to mainstream roe deer, nigger elves from badgers, also location of initial elf bases after landing on a planet and different goals: high elves would be descendants of communication engineer teams and pilots, wood/main bulk of elves biology, physics and hydrophonics teams, dark elves as archeology teams that went rouge after poisoning supplies with hidden military agents)

This story, and this pic just simply implies humans and elves working together as buddy-buddies would just result in them being nazis and or facists who'd also love flaunting around their half-elven offspring who'd always be better than any other people who're not like them or like elves and the human civilization who originally allied with said elves.

But same face man atleast produces waifus user!

...

...

Because it makes a good contrast showing both humans and elves at the height of their capabilities.

nah, elves see humans as otherworldly abominations to the world and prefer to keep them sequestered away on the other side of the continent

Elves are old and busted. Fairies are the latest nature...thing to ally with!

cinematic.

If only Veeky Forums didn't always have to make them uncompromisingly grimdark at every turn so they can feel smug about being accurate to the source material.

Dude, fairies are fucking brutal. It's not about being smug, though I wouldn't mind seeing a "cheerlight" fairy thread, too.

On the contrary. They're more advanced usually.
In settings where there are less advanced tribal version presented, that version is usually also associating with pretty narrow fields of magic, like shamanism or nature-related intuitive magic.

>be me, high elf justice representative
>me and other justiciars visit a state and or county of our human allies
>after a boat ride and arriving in a port of theirs we're taken to a 'car' of theirs, its some horseless carriage that runs on 'petroleum', whatever that's suppose to be
>we all fit into this big 'car' of theirs and head off to the capitol city we're going to have a meeting with some human governors
>we arrive in the town we'll be having the meeting in, damn the buildings these humans build are big
>we have big building ourselves in out elven cities, but these human buildings are mostly tall concrete towers with lots of glass, so many glass windows
>we see more of these 'cars' of theirs also it's pretty noisy in their cities, i know cities are noisy but WOW these humans make so much noise
>finally arrive in the city hall where we meet human politicians for our meeting
>suddenly many human civilians look at us with awe, like we're the biggest thing they saw in their entire silly human lives
>figures they'd gawk at the great presence of an elf, the silly not-so-hairy apes
>we meet with 'Senator' Linda Thompson
>she shakes my hand and says its an honor to have such illustrious and great people in their lands and be such great friends with
>you're damn right we're great and illustrious
>as I make formalities with the other human politicians being a ranking one myself, more humans
>this time the 'media' start hounding us everywhere, Senator Thompson tells me to just wave and smile at the cameras
>these humans hound us with their devices, don't they have anything else better to do?
>we finally enter the building i tell the armed justiciars to stay outside the building and are permitted to roam around this town and win the hearts and minds of these people

>advanced humans and retarded fanatsy races
That was not worth the bump.

>cont
>as soon as i say the armed soldiers can roam around i already i see some of my fellow elven men and women fraternizing around those humans
>see one elven male soldier fancy around some stout and plump looking human woman as the chubby human female fawns over him
>nothing against being with a human, but whats so 'special' and exotic about those round and stout ones, i will never know
>as i enter the building this human boy comes up to me and says
>Wow you're so pretty miss. One day when I get older, I'll date you and I'll marry you!"
>wtf!?
>this kid's like 5 years old and wants to marry me!?
>sure iam a good looking elf woman with many years worth of knowledge and experience but what the hell child?
>Senator Thompson says thats her son, no one was able to look after her boy so she 'took her child to work day.'
>she tells me her son would make a charming and handsome man as we head to the conference hall
>little human boy still eyes me and tells me im so pretty
>psh! fucking humans

>it's the "elves are retarded" episode

are you weren't you told to not write anything ever again

You sentence would roughly mean Allah is Elf. You should instead write elfhu albar, you simple infidel.

You fucking heretics...

Christ, I was cringing all the way through, but that ending of "and then I fingered my elf waifu who sought ME out and I drove over the nigge- I mean orcs in my big awesome tank!" just made me puke.

Nooooo, this is not the user you are expecting nor talking about.

Yes I wrote but as an alternative pro-elf version for the 'fucking elves' maymay which is now 'fucking humans.'

As for the whole advanced humans thing, I just figured that's the setting OP's trying to talk about judging from his not! GATE image.

Something's off with those ears. Is she supposed to be a Half Elf? Because those ears don't look elven-pointy standards enough.

Also here's another pic for you user

Couldn't tell if this is 40K related, way too anime.

>but as an alternative pro-elf
If this was your intent then you did a pretty bad job at it.

I like it.

>Haha! Look at all these prissy humans 'n elves! Thinkn' they're oh-so-superior with der tech 'n magick' Those 'oomans thinkin' their fancy-schamncy tech and guns make them so powerful! Ohh and don't get me started on them elves. Thinkin' they're great fighters and soo strong with der magicks! We dwarves may not have dat same fancy-schmancy gizmos those humans have nor the same magicks as them elves. But we sure know how to be tougher than those Milk Drinkin' panzies. Screw them elves and those humans in particular!

...

>Having to do something as degrading as associating ourselves with humans

this picture caused the one greatest moment in my quest

>or make them the useless downtrodden forest-savages/slave race who nobody wants to play ever.

What if that's exactly what i'm aiming for?

How to get a high elf waifu?
>tfw no life as a sorceress of hoeth's guide when the two of you go diving into tomb kings ruins.

>posts elrond

By letting this thread die. Unfortunately, you failed.

so do I get a wood elf waifu?
>so spellslinger waifu to paint fingernails with.

Why do all fantasy races have to be on the same level?

I mean, seriously? What's the problem with having a bunch of magical dudes that with mythical capabilities?

Why not give Drow/Dark Elves a chance for waifu or husbando instead?

...

you're thinking wood elves
and even then they're druids

Aztek elves for life

...

yes, thats what i meant. God is Elfy. :)

do you know which one good user? or anyone?

Anyone know where

is from?

Thanks I love you in advance.

Pretty sure you can just google up "Warhammer Fantasy: Cinematic"

These guys = pretty much said it already.

Also the Warhammer Fantasy Dark Elf babe is such great potential waifu material.

>mentions Aztecs
>ISIS parody image
What are you implying you pseudo-heretic?

huh, pretty fitting thread to blog about my dream last night
>Be goblin in lich-king's new battlewagon formations. Gunner or TC equivalent or someshit, dream drifted a bit.
>early steam tech so like Leonardo's fighting vehicle looking things with a smokestack and a couple of steam cannons.
>We are allied with the last few remaining human kingdoms via the powers of extortion on the dark lord's part and desperate concessions on humans part.
>We're fighting the high elvish jihad/crusade/riech that has steamrolled human realms via enchanted armor/weapons and sorcery and magic beasts.
>weird ass battles where the rest of my goblin crew are trying to stay alive as we shell a fucking mage and try to out maneuver land dragons. In a claustrophobic wood and metal box. With steam vapors and coal smoke hazing the fuck out of the interior. Praying that this contraption build by the hands of hobgoblins and designed by a mad dwarf doesn't have its boiler let go.
>The locals are terrified of us and only tolerate us at best because we are better than the alternative of being used as feed for elvish dragons.
>We can't loot or plunder because the dark lord doesn't want us fucking with the treaties. We've already had to mow down some orcish mutineers who tried.
>We've lost a lot of wagons and a lot of familiar faces as we roll back the knife ear tides to the old borders of the human lands. The new guys are dying a lot faster then the veterans. The veterans are surly as fuck and would probably have been liquidated for insubordination if it weren't for the fact that we could run the wagons and that we got the job done. Some of the new guys who are surviving are starting to get good at reading semaphore and the basic plumbing and carpentry we have to do on the wagons.
>The humans that are still alive closer to the border are a lot less suspicious of us, just glad that someone is driving back the high elves.
>The river is not too far ahead of us. Beyond that is Elvish land.

I'll play in that game in a heartbeat. Pity we have different sleep schedules.