That Guy Thread

That picture was me playing a cleric every damn time lol

Immediately we hit our first problem, we had 3 assault marines but no devastators or tactical marines. Gm tried to get one of them to change to something with a bit more firepower but all three refused. Pale and myself were fine as we filled specialty roles but it was clear GM wasn't happy about this. Still he relented and let us try with our rather melee oriented team. To try and soothe Gm both Pale and myself grabbed bolters for some ranged weapons.

We get a brief history on our target planet. Ork WAAAARGH met its end here but the cleanse and burn programs were never completed so savage orks have popped up in the forests. They were just a nuisance until an ork Rok crashed onto the planet and the warboss has begun gathering the savage orks to him to start a new Klan. Unfortunately for us the warboss is smart and we cannot pinpoint his location from orbit so we will have to go down to the planet and try and get local intel to try and pinpoint the location of the war boss and kill him. We are also told by our inquisitor handler assisting the populace is a secondary objective, the whole planet can burn as far as he cares, just get that damn Ork Boss.

We touch down in a military bse that has been weathering the worst of the ork assaults and we quickly get exposition from the commander there that the government here is retarded and greedy, that the cleanse and burn programs were discontinued by the current planetary governor and there is a civil war brewing over the incompetence of the local governor and his administration. Before we can really get into specifics (or a Commissar can appear for some 'morale support') an alarm sounds as another Ork wave is coming in so we defend the base.

The base's east wal lwas breached a few days ago so most of the attacks have been focused there. Needless to say we head straight for the breach. Pale finds some turrets offline and sets off to try and get them up and running for fire support, Dude bro, Council and Pussy go down to take the fight to the Orks while I stay with Pale to give him covering fire.

Dude and Council are playing the SW and DA rivalry as a competition to see who can kill the most Orks, Pussy whipped is doing nearnly nothing as his girlfriiend called so is on autopilot for combat. Pale manages to get a turret up which mows down the Orks and I generally just pick my shots and occasionally yell some mantra to help boost the morale of the human troops nearby. We push the assualt back and discover the orks attacking were all savage, bone and rock weapons with no ranged weapons in sight. We also find one savage Ork alive and wounded and decide lets see if he knows anything. At this point however Pussy whipped is off his phone and, annoyed he didn't get to rp much during the fight, loudly declares "Suffer not the alien to live!" and kills the ork before we can question it. Cue a sigh from GM who just had his important plot point giving NPC murdered by an overzealous idiot. We aren't overly happy about Pussy going full Black Templar and head back to the base commander who the Gm uses as our plot giver, saying the first place to get hit was a communications relay out in the forest. The guy in charge there was apparently pretty big on recording everything so we may find some logs that will help us (hint hint, nudge nudge fucking go there for the plot).

We call in our transport, gear up and head out to where the relay is, believing the orks lack any decent anti-air to pose a threat to our transport.

We touch down at the relay and find what you would expect. Socrch marks, bullet holes, dead bodies and other indicators something big happened here. We quickly agree we need to keep Pale alive and well as knowing orks they probably trashed the place and we will need some repairs done. We slowly make our way into the facility, taking note of the signs of battle and damage to the facility.

As we get deeper our xeno-sense starts tingling and we located a dead ork Kommando and realize what we just walked into. Que ork ambush in tightly packed corridors. Unfortunately for them we had Dude and Council in the front and Pussy in the back who proceeded to show why you don't bring a gun to a melee fight.

We fight our way to the main control room and find our first miniboss, and Ork Kommando leader who is setting demo charges to take the relay down. Dude charges to melee...and promptly triggers a trip wire at the door knocking him on his ass and causing a bit of damage. Council quickly decides to try and have them come to us and sets up against the wall, trying to goad the orks into coming to him. Pussy has a better idea; lob a few grenades into the room....the room filled with delicate systems we need to access the logs, and where demo charges are set up where Dude now lays wounded and in need of aid.

Gm is clearly exasperated as he explains the grenade has damaged the enemies but also the computers we needed to access. Thankfully the demo charges don't go off and Pale and I use our turns to pop in and unload our bolters into the surviving Ork boss, Pale landing the killing blow which pissed Pussy off because he wanted to kill the boss by himself. We tell him to shut up, especially Dude who had to burn a fate point to stay hanging by a thread so I can patch his ass up.

Pale managed to retrieve some severely damaged logs from the grenade fragmented data banks and discovered the relay actually recorded an SOS signal from a jungle patrol unit near one of the major rivers through the jungle, mentioning a very large ork was with them. Pale also discovers some logs haven't been damaged but instead deleted on the same day the relay was attacked, meaning someone here had something to hide. We also discover that according to the staff records we are short about 10 dead staff, including the guy who was all about keeping logs. Suspecting this may have something to do with the civil unrest that has occurred we relay it to the Inquisitor and head back to base.

We use local maps to pinpoint the location the patrol had spotted the 'big ork' and discover it is also likely the location the assualts on the base are coming from. We all sit down and discuss what to do. Pussy wants to charge in, Dude and Council want to have some air strikes to soften the target up, Pale and I want to wait until the next assault and attack the camp from the back. Eventually Council and Dude come around to our way of thinking but Pussy is adamant Space Marines would just charge in. However Due cannot come with us, his character is pretty badly injured and GM decides to end the session there telling Dude to make a temporary character as a replacement for the next game.

When next game rolls around Dude shows up with his new character, an Ultramarine scout. Our plan is simple, wait for the orks to launch an attack on the base and use that as our chance to enter the enemy camp. Pale, Pussy, Council and I will cause a lot of noise to draw out the war boss, Dude will stay back and assassinate the boss the moment he stick his head into Dude's sniper scope. What could possibly go wrong?...EVERYTHING!

This plan was under an ill omen from the fucking start with the first role of the game being a nat 100 with Council trying to give a speech to the base personal to improve there morale at the impending ork assault. What was supposed to be a rousing speech about fighting the aliens and dying in glory for the Emperor became 'you are all going to die, please try not to die too fast because we have shit we need to do'.

So leaving the base with crumbling morale to the Commissar we board our transport and plan to drop in near the enemy base to draw their attention while the transport drops Dude off at a separate location for a more stealthy entry. Our ship draws some light enemy fire, which is good, we want them after us...but Pussy decides he aint sitting in no ship anymore and jumps out with his jetpack on, leaving us just staring at him as we realize Pussy has gone full retard. Our ship has to turn back so we can go reinforce him but by that point Pussy has taken a few hits and getting overrun. We quickly set down and the others cover me while i rush out to drag his stupid ass back onto the ship. All the while Pussy is complaining that we didn't jump out with him (none of us had jump packs) that we should have covered him (he didn't tell us what he was doing before hand) and now the plan was ruined as he was injured (he ruined the plan by jumping out of the transport). Whats more our little turn around and hover has given the orks time to gather their rocket launchers and fire. Our transport takes a ht and despite Pale doing his best our ship goes down hard, wounding all of us and nearly killing Pussy (saved by a fate point).

We may be alive, but we are all injured, alone in Ork territory and with no reinforcements on the way with the Ork horde closing in. Oh and dude is nearly dead again from the crash, thanks Pussy.

So our situation is as follows;
Pussy nearly dead, Dude severely injured from the crash, all of us having minor injuries, no back up and a pissed of ork horde on its ways. Our one saving grace is we crashed near the Ork camp, so we can possibly finish our mission.

Pale decides he is gonan take one for the team and stay with the transport. He plans to rig up the ships guns to work as automated turrets and draw the horde towards him. When he gets over run he will overload the engines and detonate a demo charge to take as much of the horde with hi mas he can as he will not let the ship fall into Xeno's hands. We suggest Pussy should stay back as well as he is already nearly dead and having an assault may buy some more time but Pussy refuses to stay, believing his half dead carcass will actually 'help' us by going to the camp.

GM actually had Pale play out his last stand and that bastard managed to rack up quite the body count, running out of bolter ammo, then turret ammo and finally bolt pistol rounds before he got overrun taking out a sizeable portion of the horde when he an heroed in a glorious explosion of jet fuel. GM ruled the explosion was so large the base under ork assault saw it and decided it was use causing trouble for the Orks, motivating them to fight harder.

Our surviving team moved towards the camp wide, trying to flank and adopting a pure non-engagement policy so we could reach the camp or at least get as close as possible. Despite the utter ballsing up Pussy had done the plan was the same, we make as much noise in the camp as we can to draw out the boss, Dude takes the shot.

We reach the camp and Due sets up in a tree for a good vantage point as Pussy, COuncil and I metal gear solid our way into the camp. We decide the best way to cause trouble is to take out the ork vehicles and ammo dump so Council and I take the vehicles while pussy goes for the dump.

>expecting leveled loot in a peasant house

every time

That pic is so good.

This girl in our group decides to play a warlock, who is a psychopathic killer, in a very poorly done open world d and d game by a first-time gm. Granted most of our characters where evil in some way, hers was just way too over the top.
The first session that our group met she was subtle about who her character was and what she was doing. She was being like a normal evil character and trying to hide her terrible actions. Towards the end of that session though, when we were in the middle of the woods, she started to perform blood sacrifices of fallen bandits we just fought, to try and summon death. We should have seen this and been like no stop it, but at the time we thought whatever were evil anyway who cares about.
After that, she starts to murder random npcs anywhere anytime and for no reason other than to summon death. She slays hookers, leads children out into the forest, all kinds of just stupid shit over and over. And the gm allows all of this to happen without any real difficulty (no npcs fighting back, npcs using logic or common sense, or guards even investigating the murders). She gets out of every situation by persuasion checks, thanks warlocks for having high charisma! In fact, the gm rewards her by making her sacrifices cause bonuses to her abilities and magic damage.
So, the sacrifices continue and her powers get stronger and she becomes bolder in slaughtering people in the streets and in public. She summons demons from a mine town and killers all the miners. She kills random travelers on the road which turns the sky red for the night and gave her ridiculous power boost.

Our monk lost his leg in combat so we had to try and save his life by taking him to the nearest hospital. We got there just in time and he was in a coma for a bit. While in town she has the brilliant idea to sacrifice out monk to get a mega power boost. Long story short a huge fight ensues in the monk’s hospital room causing the whole hospital to collapse and killing our sorcerer in the process. The monk survived. She was knocked out in the process and tried to say she shouldn’t be because the sorcerer died, luckily the gm didn’t do that. Our paladin decided to take her unconscious body in to the local authorities after knocking her out. As he’s taking her in, vigilantes come in and request he gives her to them. Our paladin is like no justice is justice and goes straight to the guards of the town. The guards then assume that the paladin knocked her out and was making up this story for some reason, idk the gm was fucking stupid with explain why all the witnesses and our statements were misunderstood by the guards to thinking she was innocent and that the paladin committed a crime. So, the paladin gets sentenced to death, for some reason, and become a broken oath paladin by losing faith in the legal system after we help him escape.

So, we go to the “final area” and start trying to take out the bbeg by amassing a cobalt army to go to an awesome battle. We start entering the castle at full health, and she is at the back leading her group of men and decides that she is going to suddenly help the bbeg and kill all of us. Obviously, this is a big mistake. She cast a fireball and eliminates all our troops and deals a shit ton of damage to us unexpectedly. Fortunately, the group is level ten, I’m a wizard, the sorcerer became a bard, the paladin is op, and the monk is the monk. So, we went fuck this shit and wanted to slay her ass. She then says to the gm she rolls to persuade us it was an accident, and the group over rides the gm and says no persuasion check for this one it fails. She start the combat and tries to kill us with another fireball, fuck you bitch, couterspell (insert giant middle finger). She goes down in two turns and our paladin grants the final blow, killing her character for good. She starts crying and the session ends early.

After she left with her boyfriend, I talked to the gm and he was like she should have stayed I was going to reincarnate her and have her be super powerful with the bbeg. I was just blown away by how much he was enabling her fucking stupidity, and he wasn’t even going after the pussy with her, he was just that fucking stupid to think that what she was doing was okay.

>spice rub
>and then barbecue sauce over it
It's one or the other, genius. You're wasting the flavor of both otherwise.

It was actually fun stealthing around the facility, Dude relaying enemy patrols and positions to use over the vox (and inspired a stealth based all scout squad at a later date). Council and i decided we would set our grenades to detonate in the fuel dump tanks with Pussy to do the same at the dump, the idea being to spread the orks out a bit so we had a better chance...it was a good plan which is why Pussy hated it. At the point we were supposed to detonate the nades simultaneously Pussy got a call from his girlfriend. Pussy decided instead of detonating his nades in game we should 'play out until he got off the phone'. We were fucked over by 4th wall pussy.

So now Council and I stood, asses in the wind as Ork's rushed our position. Dude is in his tree wanting to help but we tell him to not do anything as the ork think it is only us so he can still take the shot if the warboss comes out.

Council and I manage to do a good job of defending ourselves, Dude acting as a spotter for us. The whole time this is happening we keep calling out to Pussy it is his turn only for him to say "I pass" instead of detonating his fucking grenades!

Finally the GM takes pity on us and has the ork warboss come to look at what is causing all this ruckus. Dude takes the shot...and misses. He quickly burns his last fate point to fix that and manages to land a hit but not kill the boss. Dude quickly gets the fuck out of his tree as Council rushes in to engage the ork warboss in close combat as I do my best to cover Dude as he tries to re-position. Meanwhile Pussy is still passing...this has taken roughly 50 minutes, 50 minutes of Pussy on the phone 'passing' every time his turn comes up. I remember imagining a blood angel kneeling in the shadows going 'yes dear, of course dear, I'll be home before 5 dear'.

So COuncil is locked i ncombat with the Ork warboss and despite some good rolls he eventually falls, fate point burned to try and stay alive as he slips into unconciousness. It's gone tits up. Pale is dead, Dude is running, Council is nearly dead and Pussy is talkign to his girlfriend. Wel lfuck it if I'm gonna die I'm gonna follow Pales example and do it heroically.

I toss my weapon aside and pull out my combat blade and yell to the Orks that the 'Emperor is with me and I shall see you foul xenos vanquished in his name. Lord Sanguinius be with me, guide my blade so I may strike down this unholy wretch in your name. For the Emperor!'

Right as I finish my speech Dude has positioned and fires again, drilling the bolt between the ork warbosses eyes and dealing the last bit of damage needed to kill him. The orks, thinking the Emprah actually came down to help me piss bolt it out of there. We all laugh about what great timing that was out of game and I quickly have my character run over to Council to try and stabilize him. And at that glorious moment of victory Pussy comes back, and he is not happy to hear we just won while he was away.

Pussy is fucking mad that we just finished the climax of the mission while he was away. He first tries to say we should have paused until Gm points out he himself said multiple times he 'passed' his turn so if he wanted to blame someone for not puasing he should blame himself. He then said he wanted to do it over from his turn but Gm ruled no, team won fair and square and deserve the victory. Pussy then is furious to learn that squatting in an ammo dump doing nothing doesn't count as an xp worthy action and thus gets the bare minimum xp from the mission completion. It further infuriated him that as Pale played out his last stand so well his new character will get an xp boost for his previous characters bad assery.

It is the final straw for Pussy who adopts the 'dating mans defence, which is 'at least I have a girlfriend unlike you guys!'. Council is married with a kid, Dude bro has scored more chicks then he can count, even Pale has had a girlfriend. GM, politely but firmly tells Pussy to get out and not to come back until he has grown up.

Pussy never returned, we had had it with his shit and not being able to simply tell his girlfriend 'i'm busy, talk to you later'. We saw him around a bit as he lived locally and there was only one FLGS nearby. He pointedly ignored us and his girlfriend glared at use everytime she saw us (to the point she actually forfeited a magic game when I was her opponent as she refused to play against me).

Gm continued our group, Dude continued to play his sniper as he liked it more then his SW characters, Council lived and continued to fight as a DA, Pale built a Storm Warden devastator and my Apothecary lived on for two more missions before dying to a new that guy's shenanigans.

With ribs maybe, but pulled pork needs both. Assuming you're not a total pleb and make your own the rub is used as a base for the sauce.

You had a paladin the whole time and *that* was the moment he chose to step in? Christ, if your GM wasn't as godawful as you're saying, he should've stripped that guy's oath as soon as he let the first innocent murder slide.

>Granted most of our characters where evil in some way, hers was just way too over the top.
You all deserved worse than you got.

I like stories with happy endings. It sounds like you guys were having fun all the while too.

Fuuuuuck too many stories because my pathfinder group is anywhere from five to nine people. Just gonna list them by the characters they play cause most of them build and rp the same character every campaign
>father alyster-neckbeard/weeb only ever plays paladin and declares himself the defacto leader of the party, builds his current and ex girlfriends character sheets
>Worthless half elf ranger, father alysters current gf, nice girl but useless in a fight always stays at the center of the party to avoid being a target.
>Ashimar cunt, the father's ex gf always a fucking summoner always argues with gm because he has her laptop out either on Twitter or metagaming always acts annoyed over existence of other players.
>chaotic dumbass-my best friend unfortunately, only plays witch or fighter always chaotic neutral and does a decent job of rping but is prone to dumb shit that screws the party over ( pissing off royalty, burning down bars,reviving a dragon that almost party wiped which led to party wipe because "I felt bad for it")
>Dr do little- plays multiple classes but always insists on having some form of pet, mount, familiar,etc which the party goes out of their way to kill for amusement, always fails hard during quests and has highest pc mortality rate of entire group
>Captain clusterfuck-banned from playing summoner,paladin,bloodrager,alchemist,evil or chaotic in any form and not allowed to be any race capable of flight, due to several incidents the most notable of which was summoning a whale while airborne only to have it land on and kill a dragon and two party members.
That's just the basic outline of some of the dumbasses I play with, I'd have to find my thumb drive with my campaign logs to really get into details about the "that guy" moments they've had

>DM is a retard, the thread

Like seriously. How bad is he

Its a fucking rogue.

Anyone have the pic with the cumdump cleric?

>LG Party dwarf gets healed and saved by our true neutral druid tiefling many times over many sessions
>Tiefling never has any Ill will towards the party nor the dwarf
>Party is headed for the mountainhome
>"Why is the tiefling with us anyway"
>"I don't trust her, devilish hellspawn"
>"She's stalking us to sacrifice us!"
>Player and I confront him about toning down his tiefling hate
>"Lol I'm just following the lore, everyone hates tieflings according to the book"
This should have been a red flag for me, this guy caused so many problems down the road.

>summoning a whale while airborne only to have it land on and kill a dragon and two party members
that's cool as heck

Thank me later

Not even started yet, but here goes...
>GM organizes a group online
>advertises it as friendly to newcomers
>people join up, some have never played RPGs before
>organize session 0 for character creation
>it's all good, there's one or two veterans in the group who say they'll help with the new players
>and then there's that guy
>insists on the group chat that everybody should have a character rolled up and ready to go at the first session
>criticizes the GM for providing background info on the setting instead of describing it as they go
>does
>it
>all
>in
>short
>messages
>to
>spam
>the
>chat
>boasts about how his previous GM let him shoot someone in the head for taking too long to introduce their character
>has genuinely started to put some people off coming
Goddammit I just wanted a nice fun game

...

Once again, I'm peeved by how the player can hear his GM giggling over the internet.

goddamn nobles

> (and yes, I'm aware that if you think everyone's That Guy, you're probably That Guy)
That only really counts if every That Guy in the group is being That Guy is a similar way.

It's entirely possible to have a group of faggots who are all nauseating in their own way. I.E
>railroad GM
>lolrandumb Fuckwit
>edgemaster Mckiddiefiddler
>rampant furfag
Etc

once i was that guy and i regret it
i was always late, always tried to derail the story for the sake of my story and ruin other peoples characters

i am sorry

>That Group
archive.4plebs.org/tg/thread/47852646

It's ok, as long as you learn from it. And you clearly have.

>thinking "yeah this is pretty bad"
>get to the part with the 12 dwarves
>mfw

I am the "that guy" of my group.

My friends always convince me to play DnD, then turn around and always complain that I can't roleplay to save my life.

>DM calls his players murderhobos because they don't want to be railroaded into a shitty dungeon and set up an assassin's guild in a brothel instead

Jesus what an awful DM.

Fucking try a little harder.
Hate that about one of my players.
Says he wants to get better at the actual roleplay part of the game. so I feed him some situations where he'd need to do some talking in-character, for example, give an alibi to the town guard.
>"oh, um... I don't know. user, you are better at this, what should I say?"
FUCKING TRY! Just TRY dammit!

somehow i did
i am still a horrible player, but thats because i lack creativity and not because of i am that guy

I do try, its just my hardest is dry as fuck.

I too am a noobie. I'm trying to use roll20 to get my first experience for roleplaying, but there's just too many rules I don't understand. Do I have to look up guides on youtube or something? Or just try to sneak my way into a group and ask questions as they come?

If you have no friends, find your FLGS and go to a few sessions there. Get to know the people. They're usually very helpful and patient. After that, you should have a better idea of what you want to do.

I think you just need to find a character you really like. I used to pretty much just play my characters as "me but a cleric" or some shit because I couldn't really get into the character I rolled, but I actually tried branching out into something different and ended up being my best roleplaying yet.

And if there is no FLGS?

Honestly? OkCupid, set your profile so that you're looking for anyone as friends only, and state that you are looking to start a gaming session. Don't be a creep, and look decent in your photos, and that should be about it.

This is more That GM.

>a campaign starts over the summer
>starts with a haunted house
>turns out it was actually solid holograms
>okay.jpeg

>the rest of the campaign turns out to be a completely unrelated list of threats to this one town and inconsequential NPC's
>find out he's making it up as he goes along, to the point he can't even keep his soundtrack straight

The joke is it's me.

I've tried, but the only thing I've played is Pathfinder and honestly it doesn't interest me at all, but Its the only thing people want to play.

It didn't become That Group until the whining, though in-universe, robbing a random tavernkeeper and then hitting him in the head even though he complied, possibly causing permanent brain damage, is beyond even most sword-and-sorcery "morality is gray as long as you're having a good time" levels of douchebaggery.

>That guy who tries to use him leaving the game as some sort of blackmail.

I'd suggest looking up a group for people from your country. There usually is one for every country large enough to get 20+ people into the group.

My suggestion is to start by reading the rules for whatever game you are playing. Probably DnD, so the players handbook.

like a pirates code, its more of a guideline, but its a good place to start and can give some interesting idea's with some of its more off topic text.

>13th Age
>Wizard argues with Pally over where to go next on adventure
>Wizard is being completely unreasonable
>Pally punches wizard
>Wizard shocking grasps Pally
>All on a tiny rowboat with 6 people on it
>TFW the Mary Sue and the Edge lord literally rocked the boat

This is something i do in video games with a large degree of customization and RPG's alike, but find a character or concept you really like. That isn't superman or some other OP bullshit. things you like based on them being interesting, not powerful.

From there, try to emulate that. build the character as close as you can get, but don't be rigid. You will need to make some fluff changes. After that, when you are roleplaying, just channel that concept or character.

For example, if you've ever played an MMO as a healer, its an utterly aggravating experience with rando's. Channel that into an asshole cleric thats constantly criticizing the party's poor choices, but at the end of the day still does his job.

I've posted this once months ago, but might as well post it again:

>Never played IRL and thought I might give it a try
>See a notice for a new player into a Runequest 6 game
>Know none of them, but I give them the benefit of the doubt
>Turns out that they are pretty chill
>Me being me am prone to making random off-shoot jokes that break the pace both in and out of the game, but I try to keep them to a minimum so that it doesn't become annoying
>The DM was the least chill guy, but as long as I didn't ruin the game and roleplayed he let it go
>After some sessions we get to a part in the campaign that he becomes almost erect from describing
>He had been preparing a long, intricate and admittedly epic scenario where we need to infiltrate a village where the resident devil worshipers live and are trying to do their voodoos
>Traps, bottlenecks, patrols, all the good stuff
>We manage to sneak through most of it and get only into some silent scuffles with mook guards
>Finally have a direct look at the village hall
>In the front is a scrawny old man trying to become the vessel of the devil and he is nearly done with it
>My archer decides to try and stop it by letting an arrow go at a massive distance
>I crit
>Kill the guy in one hit
>DM sits there mouth agape while the players congratulate me for the lucky roll
>We high tail from the village while chased by the denizens
>DM ends the session there, clearly agitated
>We decide to take two weeks before we return to the game
>Eventually get back and game starts again
>Now, however, everything is stacked against me
>Weather conditions are always against archers, enemies always have somebody ready to ambush me specifically mid fight or gap closer abilities
>Fine then, I guess he thinks that archers are OP so I can see it
>Except when we RP every character is hostile, racist and otherwise against me
>Even though we had another player whose character was from the same place as mine and nobody was racist towards me

>Later on one of the players, during a bathroom break, tells me that the DM still fucking hates me apparently
>The DM blames me for ruining his great encounter and for that tries to focus me down
>When I get back I try to confront the DM about the whole ordeal
>He has none of it and stands up
>While yelling, he moves around the table, calling me a game breaking min maxer cunt and so forth
>He then starts poking me chest while still telling me that I am literally worse than Hitler
>Me not having any of it stand up
>He reels back and covers his face with his arms as if I was going to punch him
>Say "fuck this shit" and get out
>On the way I hear some muttering from the DM
>One of the players yells "Oh shut the fuck up"
>Keep in touch with the other players because they are chill

>Called you a min-maxing cunt for rolling a crit
>Fails to conceptualize the idea of Randomness
>DM's being this butthurt

At least you got something out of it.

One time, i had a level 10 Sorc as a boss against a bunch of level 6's.

None of them did anything but the fucking ranger riding a boar, who shot him once, did a good chunk of damage, and happened to loop around the way the guy dimension doored too, loosing a second arrow and nailing the guy dead. Also, fuck favored enemy, and i shoulda realized he had that. but i was a new DM and i was retarded.

As a DM, you gotta realize that the players may inadvertently deal with your shit quite well, and other times have issues with shit you thought would be way beneath them.

Man, that DM is shit. The things those players got up to is an average session in cyberpunk ffs.

Not best GM-ing.
Players are dumb. Gotta lead with the "hey, you realize this is a pretty poor tavern, right?" Before they can hype themselves into it.

It's a tavern, what were they expecting to find?

Kick that guy out. I would. He doesn't know how to play and I doubt he really even enjoys the experience that much.

Is it being That Guy if the GM basically told you to be "That Guy" for the sake of getting rid of another That Guy.

>That Guy builds a ranger/fighter
>specializes as hunter
>constantly bitches at GM to give him a pet wolf
>steals a cub from a wolf spirit's pack
>group becomes separated, wolf caught by blackmarket people
>keeps trying to convince us and everyone we meet in the town to help get his wolf back
>wants us to free a wolf in the middle of a starting rebellion with the group split between factions

Also
>constantly drags out decisions of the party, often resulting in us almost being killed
>always belittles every single mistake our characters make by failing a role due to a 1
>literally broke his legs falling off a tree as a wood elf, managed to shoot a full arrow barrage into a giant tree he was hiding behind and also managed to fall down a 600 meter cliff after failing a 50 cm jump, only surviving because DM allowed him 5 chances
>immediately becomes violent if a party member makes fun of how regularly his shit causes trouble or fails

He's the typical kind of edgelord nerd IRL and in-game and is only ever good for fighting mobs.

His attacks against other players aren't even the chummy "fist to shoulder" kind of stuff or light slap over the head either, which sre the reason our DM even allows player attacks against each other, but instead him properly rolling shit if he's annoyed.

As in, rolling all his feats available if push comes to shove. Slapped my Gnome Wizard, that was just minutes earlier rolled over by a boulder and survived with 1 HP, using 4 potions to get back to 26, with everything he had, counting his crit fully and even tryibg to use giant slayer on his Gnome party member and primary diplomat of the group for joking about his plummet after he made fun of me failing a 10 Arcana check with a +8 bonus.
Dealt 15 damage to me and knocked me fown to 11 HP.

/blog
Sorry for venting this shit but holy fuck, I am so close to poisoning this asshole with the 20 Con DC poison with insta-death on failure I picked up a while ago.

so instead of robbing the till they went into the basement? They didn't look for the bouncers or go to the guys home and find his wife/family who probably had his money?

I would of given them rats. A room full of rats with a skeleton holing a sign asking for them to collect 15 rat tales for 3 silver.

If you are being "That guy", you are being "That guy". There's no ifs ands or buts about that.

But its a necessary evil sometimes.

>That Guy builds a ranger/fighter
>specializes as hunter
>constantly bitches at GM to give him a pet wolf
>steals a cub from a wolf spirit's pack
>group becomes separated, wolf caught by blackmarket people
>keeps trying to convince us and everyone we meet in the town to help get his wolf back
>wants us to free a wolf in the middle of a starting rebellion with the group split between factions

Unless he never actually got the 4 or so levels in ranger required for it, he was owed an animal companion. The DM being a dick about it is on the DM, not the dude.

The rest of that, though, is blatant "That guy"

>As a DM, you gotta realize that the players may inadvertently deal with your shit quite well, and other times have issues with shit you thought would be way beneath them.

This has very much been the moral of the campaign I'm in right now. Sometimes you take down the giant dinosaur golem in one round, and sometimes fucking sewer demons fuck up the entire party. You just gotta go with it.

I GM for a 5 player Dark Heresy group.

It's pretty good, and they all seem to really enjoy it, the only problem is that I have two That Guys.

One of them happens to be the party leader. I guess this was my mistake, as I allowed the players to choose the leader themselves to try and help build party dynamic. He volunteered and no one seemed opposed to him leading them. But he is entirely incompetent, and extremely... Submissive. His character is always indecisive, often leading our Tech-Priest Support to "assist" him in making decisions. His major contributions to the game has just been swearing like a sailor, because swearing makes him manly, right guys? He is rarely IC and it's infuriating, because we're running a more story based game, with focus on investigation and exploring.

Our other That Guy is worse. His character is a special snowflake Psyker who refuses to wear armor or wield a gun. He only wears his cloak and uses exclusively psychics in combat. He has never once been or talked IC. Seriously, he's other not talking at all, making shitty jokes, or trying to seduce NPCs. He's also playing a girl, so that's shitty too.

Another problem is that he can never make it to games on time, or even at all. He's been 30 minutes late to sessions, left halfway through a session, and even completely blown us off. I'd kick him out, but he's not the most emotionally stable either. I want to be sympathetic to someone who's pretty nice and going through a tough time, but they're honestly such a hindrance.

I just want to take my three good players and leave.

why don't you?

>I just want to take my three good players and leave.

God I want to do this so badly. I have a Explorator in our RT game that is
a) Commits all sorts of tech heresy
b) Roleplaying consists of detached quips to the other party members
c) Has a obession for perfecting EVERY. FUCKING. THING.
d) Is nearly impossible to kill

The only reason I haven't kicked him out of my permanently is he's the only thing holding the goddamn starship together.

It only pisses me off even more that he claims he knows about 40k.

Do it man, kill that asshole.

> OWod, It's crossover
> Be a damn ST
> player fcks up three times(she is the admin)
She's playing the street urchin on the run from the big bad Tech. and more than a little nuts
> Runs into MIB on the first day, turns self in.
> Run minor adventure for admin and murderhobo in a broken Tech chantry. let the players run out.
Literal MurderHobo, Homeless Stabbing Evil for sack of being evil. her Magic is drugs and Stabbings, herself and others.
> Second adventure, run her backstory, she's an escaped experiment.
> Enter Brokendown laboratory.
> Finds out she is a clone. MurderHobo takes over adventure and wants to unplug the Original Mage on life support
> Have to stop the adventure so admin can make her own damn choice in her own damn story.
> FastForward She's in the hospital. Don't know WHY I was on vacation that month.
> Gets prescribed Meds, agrees to take them, Other ST says they'll handle it. they don't. LazyFurr
> Meds make her a sleepwalker, but cures her insanity.
> MurderHoBo flushes meds down the drain
> Admin overdoses in desperate attempt towards sanity
> ??? Fuck this bitch
> Admin is the Sister of a high ranking NPC turned PC. Wants to fix her head.
> They're lazy fucks and never get around to it
> Runs around town, gets fucked by vampires. Bleeding out gets taken to hospital.
> Hospital says FCK IT and dejects her ass to a pyshic Ward. Run Living by Techies
> Enter "Rescue Mission" MurderHoBo, FurrFastist, Bronie(Nice guy, wrong crowd), and Bob. Bob Is cool
> Enter Normal hospital, magical hampering field. Not even a no magic field
> Enter Pam the Receptionist Huge Mind Shield
> MurderHobo casts knock off charm spell. Works kindof
> Pam explains the hospital procedures. Offers a Tour and A meeting with the Head Adminstration.
> Explains they'll need to give some ID
> Explains that they'll be searched for Sharp objects and Drugs. Reasonable, don't want sharp things around mentally damaged folks
(cont.)

> MurderHobo flips his shit.
> Pam doesn't back down, All good will lost in this tantrum
> FurFast, Bronie and Bob agree and hand over ID
Why these fucking bitchs didn't use Fakes IDs. Fuck these dumb bitchs expecting me to hand them the Technocrats for a third time
> FF Bronie and Bob walk inside
> MurderHobo walks outside and around the back
> I try to introduce a simple character to explain the situation. Calls him a fag, welp that NPC is not going to help anymore
> Ground FireDoor only opens from Inside, Handle is on the Inside, cause yeah fuck this exact situation.
> Fire Escape swings down from second story
> MurderHoBo procedes to fail muliptle Climbs checks
> -murderhobo why don't you use magic-? Bitch has forces bitch has life. literally a dozen ways for her to do this. Dumb bitch never learned the game in over six months of play time. FFFFFFF
> Not helping her this time, cause fuck this bitch claiming to beat the techies twice before hand, with those preivous milk run shit.
> After about a hot minute of roll fail. Flaming jackass wouldn't use willpower. Declare he can simply forgo roll by taking an hour to do so.
> MurderHoBo is barely contianing his shit. I'm a smug ass, but I'm trying not to show it.
> Finally he'll calm down, and learn not to rush nope
>Realize He's been trying to rush blitz the scene the whole damn time
> I've sat down and ran a ten man PVP, I'm NOT getting rushed down
> At this point inside team has actually made progress.
> Bob distracted Nurse while FurFast and Bronie got away
> Nurse Explains the hospital staff, goals and operations

> Nurse Explains the hospital staff, goals and operations

> MurderHoBo Calls inside. Says "Pull the Fire Alarm"
> Realize this is a desperation move
> I pause the session to talk with Side ST about what this means
>Reads Hospital procedure.
> Two Alarms. Aid has to go check before a general alarm is called. Makes sence flashing lights loud Noices around the unstable is a bad idea. Determines that makes perfect sences for techies control and procedure orienated paradigm.
> Standard technology is awesome. Cameras are awesome. Eletrical trips are awesome.
> They Pull the alarm
> no lights no loud noices ... beat ...
> Oldman runs around the corner out of breath with a fire extinguisher. Asks Fire?
> Bronie asks to call for the night. I like bronie I agree and let him and FurFast Fair escape away. Basically thinking escorted out
> Give rest of the players options to fair escape. They take it.
> Give Admin a chance to escape. fucks it up
> Escapes general population. Good Start. Runs into hallways without a clue, bad start. Not giving Players anymore chances. lead her to doctor. so we can move the plot
> Meets the Doctor. Doctor Asks what happened, being all dipolmantic. Please explain. Meeting you halfway.
> Roundhouse Sit. Luls No I have labcoat Armor.
> Runs away again
> I'm too nice
> Led her run to roof.
> has a temp guardian spirt, never claimed it. FFFFUUU
> Lets her climb onto the roof fencing. Tells her jumps = maybe escape, most probably death. Perfect opertunity to End the Madness Now, like she'd been wanting to and saying to for a while.
> Chickens out like a coward.
> Goes back
> Doc offers One more chance to explain. Attacks again.
> Doc is done with this and tazes the bitch. Should have just shot her.
> I'M SO DONE
> They complain. Fck these bitchs
> Handoffs the adventure to another ST. Rehash material. Don't care it's over.

(Cont)

> two weeks later, Gets IDed for looking at the park with a telescoping magical item. ... From three miles away. LazyFucking Bitch gives the character's Secrete ID For free, To the Entire Venue. FUCK THAT CHEATING HORSE SHIT. Not the first time FurrFag has pulled that NPC metagaming horse crap. but just the right time for me to say fuck that sht.

>Two Weeks after THAT ADmin Murderfucks an old folks Home.
>Finally Two Weeks After that Roit for everyone not the ADmin's Cabal

Obviously She was giving the GM handies under the table

user, if you're still around, I'd like to hear more about Captain Clusterfuck and why he is banned from those classes

>my DM asked me to make a level 10 wizard to kill a group of level sevens because he's gotten tired of them basically

Well now I'm scared. I mean, I'm allowed to use pathfinder and 3.5 resources so I have snapdragon fireworks that dazes and chains and is persistent so they have to make 2 dc 23 saves to take avoid getting fucked and lose their actions for the round, but still. If something goes wrong, it's over.

this also worries me. I started by statting a wizard who used cursed items to soften them up and a bunch of assorted interesting spells, DM seemed disappointing with my showing, so now I've made the most bullshit minmaxed shit I can think of without just going straight ray blaster caster.

When I used to participate in freeform RPs, there would always be one guy who would do random shit like pic related.

...which one is that guy?

If you have to ask, it's both.

The guy whose username and avatar is covered in white. There was no indication beforehand that he was planning on killing everybody, and this wasn't the first time he caused issues.

The guy in red was pretty cool, though he did enable this behavior occasionally by not directly calling out that guy.

>I've made the most bullshit minmaxed shit I can think of without just going straight ray blaster caster.
Wait are you trying to say ray blaster caster is good?
There are far better options, if you want to murder pcs really well use spells like.
Blindness/Deafness, with a perminant duration it will fuck up pcs a lot.
Summon Spells, just summon aether elementals, permanently invisible flying, and have ranged touch attacks out to like 400 feet.
Greater Invisibility.
Fly.
Hold Monster/Person/other save or suck spells.
And to make this all even better you have access to permanency which means all the protective spells can be up 100% of the time.

>"I've always been a trap"

Lol, never heard of healslut before. Probably suits me a bit, cause my favorite class to play in a few games has been the Kingdoms of Kalamar priest of the Lord of Silver Linings.
TLDR: drop your HD from d8 to d6, no medium armor and can't use weapons that are piercing or edged. (Cause maces are more merciful?)
Trade off: Conjuration (healing) Spells can be cast 1 spell level lower for you.
>cure light wounds is a cantrip
Mercy Domain: Conju(heal) are cast at +2 CL, and thighs like Lesser Restoration are a level 1 spell.
Unique feat: 5 ranks in Heal required, add Charisma Modifier to the CL of any "Cure" spell you cast.
KoK books have loads of fluff/mechanical information, like spending XP to rise in the rankings of a church, which eventually ends at your cleric becoming the not-pope. All sorts of universal and unique benefits of rising in church rankings.
LoSL: Add Wisdom modifier to damage healed from Cure spells (not damage to undead)

Feats like divine metamagic Range and extra turning have made me into Jesus Christ's Multilaser.

Granted, it's kinda pigeonholed as a healbot, but I don't give a fuck, I think it's funny.

A tale worthy to be sung until the light fades from the universe, brother.

>I remember imagining a blood angel kneeling in the shadows going 'yes dear, of course dear, I'll be home before 5 dear'.

Good guy DM?

>15 rat tales
>tales
Who the fuck do you think we are, the Grimm Brothers?

The "no peircing or edged weapons" thing is a reference to the medieval clergy, who were forbidden from spilling blood. Note that they were not forbidden from being badass, as long as they didn't spill blood, so they decided "well shit, we're going to have to go all blunt trauma on people's asses".