Let's (try) to play The Realms of Atlantasia: Thread 2: Electric Suicide

Chainmail of Life. It's absurd.

Can he also wear the Robes of Protection, the Steel Bracers of Protection, and the Steel Helmet of Courage? If he can, I say we load the fuck up on that stuff and then grab two Cat-O-Ninetails and go to town on...the universe.

This is the man with the plan.

Last thread, if you want to read from the start:

I think everyone is in agreement. Two Cat-o-Nine Tails.

14+8=22
22 LP for Stumpy

With his Cats-o-Eighteen-Tails and Chainmail of Life, he might not kill himself in the first turn!

Don't you mean 72 LP?

To be fair he might kill the whole planet, in case he trips. This is a risk I'm willing to take.

I'm doing base stats still.

Stumpy, Chosen of Urist, Flagellater of Planets

As the guy who named Stumpy, I petition we add the title "Dwarf Fortress," both because he is an ironclad hit-point sack dwarf, and because tripping and accidentally obliterating the entire planet sounds like the apex of Dwarf Fortressry.

...

There, done.

So, are you in agreement to drop the Longsword of Speed for MAX CATS?

Yes.

Stumpy the Dwarf(en) Fortress sounds good.
Lets start with 1 sword and 1 cat and switch to the second cat when the first one breaks?

I for one say aye.
The cats are aggressive.

CAT-O-EIGHTEEN

Max Cats.

Make it happen.

THE PEOPLE HAVE SPOKEN
MAX CATS
NO RETURN
NO REGRET

I'll be back as soon as I'm done calculating all the durability.

ALL HAIL THE CATS!

Please tell me the first thread will be archived

Thread is now archived: suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/50512930/

I hope you're please with yourself, Veeky Forums. You created this monster.

I am very pleased, thank you.

You can't imagine how pleased I am with Stumpy the Dwarf Fortress, Chosen of Urist.

You can't possibly imagine.

Poor Lucy.

>suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/50512930/
You know we are pleased.

Now watch as he takes one step forwards and decapitates himself.

We're now scheduled for the last fight in the first round of our tournament.
In one corner we have Luck Leadfoot, a somewhat clumsy Dwarf Champion who nevertheless tries her best. and fights with humble arms.
In the other corner we have Stumpy the Dwarf Fortress, Chosen of Urist, Living Armoury, Catmaster Supreme, who is pretty much a force of nature in shape of a Dwarf. Most spectators have evacuated the premises by now, well remembering Typhoon Breakwater's Whip Explosion.

So tell me:
ARE YOU READY TO FUMBLE?

Stumpy goes first, so I'm going to need 9d100.

Rolled 70, 18, 14, 13, 42, 29, 47, 86, 41 = 360 (9d100)

Rolled 97, 97, 75, 8, 30, 72, 36, 87, 32 = 534 (9d100)

EXPLOSION(S)!

Rolled 38, 99, 69, 7, 29, 93, 26, 71, 20 = 452 (9d100)

you got it, boss

I made some OC to show my support for our dwarven catlord.

It's terrible because I am a god-awful artist, but I wanted to contribute to a truly epic thread.

That's four hits and five misses!
Miss, Hit, Hit, Hit, Miss, Hit, Miss, Miss, Miss.

I'll use this as hit locations:
>Head Shot
>Head Shot
>Lower Abdomen or Forearms
>Lower Legs
>Upper Legs
>Chest or Upper Arms
>Upper Legs
>Lower Abdomen or Forearms
>Upper Legs

Using this to take the misses first.
>Miss 1
The whip hits something hard and takes (1d6)*5 damage.
>Miss 2
Armour hit on lower legs, but she has no armour there so it doesn't matter.
>Miss 3
We hit something hard again, weapon takes another (1d6)*2 damage!
>Miss 4
STUMPY SLIPS AND HITS HIMSELF FOR 3x1d4+2 DAMAGE!
>Miss 5
STUMPY SLIPS AND HITS HIMSELF FOR 1d4+2 DAMAGE!

I'm going to need 2d6 for damage to the whip and 2d4 for damage to Stumpy.

Rolled 6, 6 = 12 (2d6)

Rolled 1, 2 = 3 (2d6)

oh god is stumpy gonna sudoku round 1

Rolled 6, 6 = 12 (2d6)

RIP Whip

Rolled 1, 3 = 4 (2d4)

We believe in you, stumpy!

Rolled 3, 2 = 5 (2d4)

Rolled 4, 2 = 6 (2d6)

>Rolled 6, 6 = 12 (2d6)
rip Cat-o-Eighteen

19 self damage.
But Stumpy SURVIVES.

oh god the whip tornado claims another cat

4 hits now?

6*5+6=36
The Cat o' Nine Tails in Stumpy's right hand has 4 points of health and has just taken 36 damage. That's 9 times the limit. It's fucking atomized.

(1+2)*3=9
3+2=5
Stumpy slips and whips himself for 14 LP!

I need one of you to roll 5d100 for hit severity and another roll of 5d100 for Lucy's blocking.

Rolled 1, 57, 77, 95, 48 = 278 (5d100)

Rolled 44, 20, 83, 44, 22 = 213 (5d100)

Rolled 77, 77, 33, 89, 3 = 279 (5d100)

This is going to take a miracle for Lucy to stay un-atomized.

roll 5d100

Posting updated OC as we wait with baited breath for Stumpy to turn Lucy into what this art looks like.

Now in color. His eyes are dead because he's in this system.

All praise the cat tails!

Rolled 1, 2 = 3 (2d2)

Severity:
Head Shot, 1/4 damage
Lower Abdomen or Forearms, 1x damage
Lower Legs, 5x damage
Chest or Upper Arms, 1x damage

Lucy's blocking:
Head Shot, 1x damage, 1d10 durability loss
Lower Abdomen or Forearms, 2x damage, 1d20 durability loss
Lower Legs, 1/2 damage, 1d6 durability loss
Chest or Upper Arms, 1x damage, 1d10 durability loss

I need 4d4 for damage!

Rolled 3, 4, 3, 1 = 11 (4d4)

Rolled 2, 1, 3, 1 = 7 (4d4)

Hoping I remember how to roll dice right!

Rolled 1, 2, 1, 4 = 8 (4d4)

>5x damage to legs
uh oh

RIP Lucy

Depending on rounding.. I think Lucy might be at 1 HP
This combat system befuddles me

Aren't we dual wielding?

Rolled 2, 1 = 3 (2d2)

So, to sum up, this is the situation:

Stumpy lashes out at Lucy, slips and fall causing him to whip him self, while other parts of the whip hit the ground so hard the whole thing disintegrates WHILE Lucy is simultaneously hit in the Head, Abdomen, Lower Legs, and Upper arms.

>Headshot
3+2/4=1.25=1
We've consistently rounded down, so this deals one LP of damage, dropping Lucy to 17 LP.

>Abdomen
6*2=12
She takes 12 LP loss directly to the Abdomen, reducing Lucy to 5 LP!

>Lower Legs
5*2.5=12.5=12
And another 12 LP loss in the legs, dropping her down to -7 LP.

>Upper Arms
3 LP loss, pushing Lucy down to -10 LP.

Or, it would, if there still was a Lucy to speak of. What we have here is nothing but a fine, red mist and one exploded whip.

This was just rolling for the first hand, there's different numbers for the other.

Stumpy is gonna win the tourney, calling it now

Can't trump the Stump!

Can Stumpy switch the Cat into his dominant hand and then use his Sword in his off-hand in the next fight?

So I guess Sumpy carries onwards with one Cat-o-nine and his enchanted sword (unless his cash reward will afford him another whip (plz))

Shit, I gotta go sleep. Hope I can find the archived version tomorrow.

And, just as everyone expected, the victor of the final battle in the first round was Stumpy, who in the now deserted arena proceeded to knock down both himself and the enemy, with the important distinction that Stumpy actually survived, while Lucy's remains were never completely recovered.

Sure.

I have something planned.

How much G.C. are we able to buy for with the remaining semifinalists?

Here are the standings after a completed first round.
Any comments, favourites?

We will soon go to the first Semifinal, between Typhoon Breakwater and General Butt Naked.
Who's the fan favourite?

In the random spirit of this game, I'm going to give each participant an unloaded roll on the GC table, which can yield everything from huge amounts to absolutely nothing.

Excellent.

OC Updated to reflect the match.

General Butt Naked has proven to be an exceptional axeman. I'm confidnt he'll reach the final (which he will lose to Stumpy "Eighteen-o-cat" the Dwarf Fortress)

Let's start by seeing if our semifinalists get any new cash.
Can I get 2d100?

Rolled 31, 55 = 86 (2d100)

Well Typhoon is easier to do shitty art of, I'll tell you that much.

But I gotta give it to General Butt Naked. He seems generally competent.

That art is great, user. I had no idea what Typhoon looked like.

Rolled 6 (1d6)

1d6*100 gold for Typhoon.
1d10*100 gold for General Butt Naked.

10/10

Rolled 6 (1d10)

That's 600 gold for Typhoon Wavebreaker, the Elusive Elf.

Rolled 9 (1d10)

And an identical sum for General Butt Naked, King of Glasscannons.

So, how do the to best spend 600 gold?

The money should prob'ly be spent on weapons since armor seems kinda useless..

Get him a Large Wooden shield and Steel Helm

>TOTALLY NOT A SUCCUBUS GUYS

General Butt Naked can get Studded Bracers & Gauntlets

Have General Butt Naked's shitty fanart.

I'll stop now until the Sir Suicide shows up, unless people want me to keep going.

I'm starting to peruse the rulebook user left in the previous thread. This is the most heinous thing I think I've ever read. Was this actually sold for actual money? I feel bad for all parties involved in that transaction.

Don't worry user, your art is great while we're waiting for the countless rolls this "system" requires.

I do think we're ready for our first semifinal.

Done.

That's the individual price, but I aim to please.

Hey now, at least it's not FATAL.

Updated for accuracy. I forgot his epaulets and hat. How will you know he's a general otherwise?

His hat is also a crown, because he is King of Glasscannons.

Okay, that's maybe a little unfair. But at least FATAL had attempts at art, coherent writing and a free CD inside.

Let the battle begin!

Alright, place your bets! I don't know the odds because there are too many numbers in the way, but I have a good feeling about General Butt Naked
>ring of silence
>ring of darkness
The audience members aren't going to be happy about this.

But this system has world-shattering whips, so I think they're even.

I'm actually finding preference for the whips. I mean, I'm aghast that it was sold in the state it's in, but I can't argue that I'm having a blast watching attempts at using it.

The air is filled to the brim with excitement (and the remains of Lucy Leadfoot), as we enter our very first semifinal here in the great Baba-Luna tourney, AKA AtlantasiaBowl.

In one corner, he's short, he's mean, he's General Butt Naked. A monstrously strong fighter despite literally everything else about him, surrounded by a constant orb of silence. He's looted a spear, gotten a bit of armour on, and he's ready to fumble.
In the other corner, we have what we presume to be a Sea Elf called Typhoon Wavebreaker, but since he's always surrounded by a huge sphere of complete black, details are few. What we do know is that he practically invented the exploding whip attack, but has since then run out of explosives, and now carries a earthquake-summoning lance instead.

The General has the highest Dex, so he goes first.
Give me a 1d100 to see if he hits.