How do I play games for fun?

>list what you enjoy in other things
>apply that to your games
>profits

This post has made me realized I may be slightly autistic for real.

As somebody with Asperger syndrome I can tell you that there is nothing stopping an autistic person from enjoying RPGs. However, I do suspect that I am a bit annoying to play *with*. I can't say for sure, because nobody has ever explicitly said so (except for that one GM who actually told me to stop querying her about inconsistencies in the rule system in between gaming sessions, but I highly suspect that she was never engaged enough in the game to be a good GM anyway).

Then

I gamed with a legit autistic guy. And I've got a story. I already posted it on Veeky Forums a couple months ago.

He was really something. Nightmare fuel. When he entered the room, he just filled it to the brim - everyone would look in that direction only to immediately begin to pretend that the massive figure is not there. Which was hard due to loud (and I mean LOUD) mouth-breathing, almost like he was panting like a dog all the time, and constant mumbling to himslef - to quiet to make something of it, but loud enough to be heard across the room. And the stench of sweat and shit, god, that was horrible.

He would come to the store we played in and make scenes when he wouldn't be accepted to a game. Sometimes it were full-blown fits, but mostly just passive-agressive attempts at insults which were laughable at best. So, he came to annoy everyone three or four times a week. The owner, (who we were close friends with and who allowed us to take a separate room and game there, with beer, and who would sometimes join us), couldn't do anything because he didn't steal or break anything. Even when The Guy was quiet, it wasn't enough.

So, we were short on players in our fantasy-not!Call-of-Cthulhu game. And The Guy came. We were desperate, so the GM offered us to bite the bullet and give him a shot. We were REALLY desperate and a bit drunk, so we agreed.

Cont.

The Guy insisted that he would play a magical girl. Full-blown. With transformation scenes.

The GM argued with him for a good hour, then gave up and gave us a disturbed look. The "what have I done, forgive me" look. We exchanged looks and decided to execute Operation Excision.

Now, an interlude. Nearly half a year ago we were joined by another obnoxious piece of scum, and we, being assholes we are, didn't put up with his shit and just kicked him out of the game. He didn't take it well and threatened to tell the store owner that we steal shit from the store. Unfortunately for him, he got the boot himself.

So, The Guy made his magical girl, who proved to be as obnoxious as one would expect, and we embarked on an adventure. The Guy's luck was less then average - of all the rolls he made, nearly two thirds were failures or critical failures. We mocked him every time, and not only his character, but himself too, using epithets such as "loser", "faggot", "virgin" and such, in a typical laughing-dismissive fashion, which so many here are familar with due to being on the receiving end. Exact translations are unavailable because our native is not English.

A couple of hours full of investigation, mind-losing, inflicting violence on innocent man-eating ghouls, and mocking the Magical Girl, we had to escape the ghoul warren. We ran, and ran, and ran, but the ghoul horde was gaining on us.

There was only one solution. My character, being the Strong Guy, tripped the Magical Girl and stabbed it in the neck and back three times. Then we ran away. The horde stopped to eat the body, giving us time to run away and collapse the warren.

Cont.

The reaction of The Guy was a sight to behold. His face reddened, he began sweting profusely, and his lips began shaking. Our Smart Guy then told the newcomer that he was retarded, his stink was disgusting, his behaviour was annoying to everyone, that we and everyone else in the store is sick of him, that he should leave and be thankful that we allowed such human waste to game with us. Direct quote. The Guy looked at The GM, who said that if the group doesn't want to play with him then he can't do anything.

At this point, the veins on The Guy's forehead were so bulged that they looked almost like wires beneath his acne-ridden skin. His hands were trembling, his eyes darting from side to side. Finally, a pair of tears began running on his cheeks, and he started gasping and hiccuping (yeah). Then he just rushed out of the room and out of the store.

He even forgot his dice (really cool set though, metal, blackened, with engraved golden numbers, I kept them and use them to this day). Henever returned to the store. I regret nothing.

tl;dr - we bullied a sperg who annoyed the whole store and brought him to tears, no regrets

>we bullied and stole from someone who has a mental handicap
>are we cool yet?

Precisely. And yes, I'm bragging on Veeky Forums about it.

Awesome, judging by how much effort you put into those posts it's one of the greatest achievements of your life.

the hobby is invaded by normies, man. it ceased to be a refuge for autists and nerd long ago. normies like are scum. it will only get worse in the future.

>I'm bragging about being too much of a pussy to confront a retarded person directly
wew lad

>A bunch of people who can barely speak english bully and steal from a mentally handicapped dude then brag about it on Veeky Forums
Lol you're a faggot dude