LGS Horror Stories

>"Pray tell, what faction do you play?"
>the next two people you see are openly screaming about girls ruining gaming
>one of them inviting a rando with a girl next to him to a tabletop game after eye contact alone

bait is subtle, idiot, revise this shit.

I don't, I learned my lesson well from the 'totally not ERP, it's just mature' pathfinder game which introduced me to TTRPGs.
Yeah that and cheaper goods seems to be the motivator I felt from the staff most the time as well.

You went out and just got stuck on a guy's gums in an LGS? Was that the only thing wrong with him?

That seems like a really specific thing to just call out a stranger over.

Had it happened subtly, I would have described it as such.

Presumably the fact that if he doesn't brush it also would smell vile.

no, the guy actually has many, many things wrong with him. He was deeply unsanitary and kind of offensively dim witted. He was a roommate of an acquaintance of mine, and was actually the second worst person in that house. (the worst was a chainsmoking primadonna dickhead who I'm told by the friend was a brutal powergamer at the local Camarilla shit, but I've never done vampire larp)

the most unnerving thing about the unsanitary guy was that he was an assistant manager at a local Papa Johns, and knowing how filthy he was and that he made their fucking pizzas was deeply unsettling.

>Sound like real alpha males if you ask me; you seem more like a blue pilled cuck.
Keep /pol/ on /pol/ faggot.

>Stories happen organically, you can't go out in search of one.

I beg to differ. Pic related. Who says RPG's don't teach valuable life lessons...

I'm not buying it, man. If it was a breath issue, it would start as one. The guy wouldn't defend himself with "kool aid stains" if his mouth smelled like sin, because looks wouldn't be what he's being attacked for. He'd think of something else or start getting mints.

user went straight after this guy's gums.

Oh, okay, that puts it in better perspective.

Oh gee, guess you got me there. Must be true after all.
Thanks for turning your fake story around like that. Did the rest of the LGS clap when you turned down that guy who literally skipped over to you just to talk in Old English?

I'm just disappointed this thread isn't about really good horror game sessions.

That's less /pol/ leaking as it is a casual troll.

>5 hour combat session of a soft touch DM who doesn't realize you're trying to sacrifice your character to save the party

Once the party was safe why didn't you just book it like the rest of the party?

it involved caving in a wall or something. I remember I specifically had to actually fight until I died, and the GM wouldn't stop pulling his punches because he was afraid of being a "killer DM" snce he'd had one of those and hated it

So is r/thathappened over on Reddit slow today, or...?

>Legacy Tournie at LGS for FNM
>New guy comes in, mighty hambeast
>Plays B/W Cleric tribal deck
>Regulars include two smaller landwhales, all play 40K (Chaos and Dark Eldar but both have a huge Tau force and they love to cheese)
>1 gangly stoner who smells awful at all times and hasn't cut his hair in four years
>two chain smokers, one is a decent guy, the other is a walking anger factory
>1 unsupervised game store kid that never grew up, lives at home and sucks mom and dad dry (Who has also been caught trying to steal, openly belligerent and threatens everyone with mommy and daddys money; Buys his way into everything, even throws gifts at people just to make them like him)
>Hambeast goes 6/1, holds out in long game, grinds people down with kill spells and huge life gain
>Hambeast actually decent guy, cracks jokes, knows a lot of oldhammer (Fantasy and 40K), trying to get back into current everything since the recession hit
>Lesser landwhales upset because their mono green and red decks get stomped
>Stoner watching from a distance heckling the new guy "Testing the waters. Fatty needs a thick skin if he wants to hang in my store."
>Keeps calling him noob, scrub, fatass, openly pushes and punches him while he isn't looking to get his attention, picks up hambeasts army case and pretends to try walking out of the store.
>Hambeast turns to stoner with a firm "Stop it now."
>Parent Leech tries to play bro card with stoner. "Hey look lard ass you didn't have to come here. If you can't handle it get out."
>Hambeast looks to him, asks them to stop.
>Lesser landwhales suddenly step up too.
>"YOU'RE STACKING YOUR DECK!" "ONE TRICK PONY!" Stoner tries to push past him and goes for his deck.
>Hambeast turns out to have been legit sumo at one point.
>Arm thrusts Stoner off his feet and onto the table behind him.
>Owner finally had enough, bans hambeast for fighting.

I think that I've had enough with this store too, sadly it's the only one in my city...

Report the owner and store to Wizards. Get their sanction pulled.

If you're not going to play there you might as well take them down with you.

Good idea. I still feel bad for that new guy though. This shit has been going on for too long at this store. These dicks keep chasing out new blood or starting fights. The chain smokers went out and hung with the dude for a few minutes. Seems like they've got his back if anything else happens. I just sat there and watched all of this. Fucking clerics from Onslaught took out my tooth and nail deck like it was a joke, the guy has my respect. Never seen his play style before and he could've helped bring in a lot of change for the better that we needed...

>Only War "is the least canon 40k RPG" because of female guardsmen
They know shit about 40k then. At least on Cadia every single person was required to join the Guard. Similarly on Catachan, no civvie would survive growing up there. Hell, for the longest time the only grenade launcher Catachan model was the woman.

>Leftenant

>Leftenant
Even though the Brits pronounce it that way it's still spelled "lieutenant".

Cadians recruiting both men and women doesn't mean that Mordians are meant to be a mixed sex regiment.

>first time at LGS
>interested in 40k
>never painted a miniature before so the employee hands me an unpainted space marine and a brush
>sit down at the painting table with other people
>they observe my first try and judge silently
>start commenting
>"never held a brush before?", "woah man blue layer? never seen that before on a marine", "THIN YOUR PAINTS!!! XDDD"
>employee tells them to shut up
>one obese guy suddenly flips over his table, effectively throwing his neighbors' minis to the ground
>"FUCK YOU GEORGE WHY DO WE HAVE TO BE NICE TO IDIOT PAINTERS"
>angrily stomps around as others try to calm him down
>decide its not worth it
>thank the employee, grab a box of space marines and some paint
>as i walk out of the store he is still raging and his neighbor started crying over his destroyed imperial knight

>shit that didn't happen

go back to kotaku

With Imperial Guard I am willing to rule "male and female regiments from the same planet" until proven otherwise. I know there are some female-only regiments.

I would probably agree about Vostroyans though. I think it was specified in old fluff that it would be "firstborn son" that was given.

While the firstborn Vostroya will always be recruited I believe it has happend that other daughters and sons would join up.

My texperience with different LGS were always great even though I used to be an wakward teen and then a shy adult.

>Went to pick up some metamorphs and paints
>girl who works there trying to get to the till but keeps being pulled over by people in the shop gaming and painting
>she collects tyanids so we get talking about the allies of convenience rules and broodmind system
>all the while she's getting constant abuse and heckling
>finish the conservation up quickly and go
>she looks really embarassed and apologetic.

Anyone else feel bad for girls working at GW/model shops? I woudn't want to be the subject of attention for every autist walking in.

>I woudn't want to be the subject of attention for every autist walking in.
Then the idea would be to not work there.
It's the same as chicks working at videogame stores, if getting bothered by greasy, socially inept nerdos is that unpleasant, get another job.

It really should be common sense, so no, I don't feel bad for them.

Leave and never come back. You don't belong on Veeky Forums, go back to your hugbox circlejerk with a scoring system.

it's not their fault that people are inconsiderate though, plenty of 'nerdos' at least have social graces. As for those with mental disorders it's clearly unfair to leave them in the care of shop workers when they should have at least a friend or guardian with them. Also if they enjoy the hobby and need a job it shouldn't be prohibitive.

>Implying Reddit and Veeky Forums don't have the same userbase

reddits userbase is worst thing I've seen in many years, if you call yourself a redditor you should probably stay there

Yeah. Far too many entitled guys who don't get that the girl isn't allowed to turn them down and walk off because its her job to smile and nod. At the end of the day she's another retail worker, and they end up (sometimes unknowingly) taking advantage of that

>inb4 NO SHE REALLY LIKES ME from said dudes.

>it's not their fault that people are inconsiderate though
No, but it's common knowledge that that's who they'll be dealing with.
You can't complain about a situation you actively put yourself into.

>As for those with mental disorders it's clearly unfair to leave them in the care of shop workers when they should have at least a friend or guardian with them
That's unfortunate and shows a lack of care from said carer/guardian/friend, but it's still something that comes as part of the job.

It's going to happen, I know, they should know it, there's no stopping it.
There's no reason to feel bad for people who put themselves in situations they don't enjoy.

>Also if they enjoy the hobby and need a job it shouldn't be prohibitive.
Well, what are they going to do?
Ban most of their customers to protect some cashier's feelings?
There are plenty of other retail jobs that don't involve putting yourself in that situation, probably with better pay.

As far as I'm aware the real horror stories tend to be about GW hobby stores and the autists who work there. Outside of those and occasional nightmare shit, it's mostly general annoyance at LGS.

I generally had some really annoying workers at an LGS bother me while I browsed their books. Very obviously coming over while I looked through mags on a low shelf to make sure I wasn't pocketing their shitty mouse guard minis under the guise of reading historical wargaming magazines. Like coming up behind me to ask me what I'm reading about and going on and on about how you should only be playing Carthage because they were the best of any game and getting hostile when I explained how Hannibal's infatuation with elephants made him distinctly incompetent. Same guy ended up watching me and my friend with contempt the next day when we played card games and bought food all afternoon.

At one point in the store some dudes were talking to the one woman who worked there telling her about 'The Brick' greentext as if they had done it and didn't read about it on the interbutt, which is doubtful because they were 16 year olds.

>t. Someone who never went on Reddit and believe people on Veeky Forums

Stop trying to defend your shit site, just go back there and stay there.

if it's so great why you won't stay there?

I don't even go on Reddit

Then why are you defending trash so much?

Because I already have Veeky Forums
Going on both sites would be repetitive
(Also Reddit interface is shit)

why not go on both?

Pointlessly restricting yourself is a really weird thing to do, especially when Veeky Forums and Reddit have basically nothing in common anyway

Why do all of these stories sound like lies?

It baffles me that there is a cold war between the sites when we could fight the actual enemy: SJWs that shit up both sites

>why not go on both?
Because one of them has people praised/chided for what is said/presented while the other has people praised/chided for what has previously been said/presented regardless of quality, only valued by the average idiots opinion.

Or we could just stay here and talk about traditional games and not bring up other idiots.

>Or we could just stay here and talk about traditional games and not bring up other idiots
Good point
We're all shit people talking about games, whatever site we're using

>Because one of them has people praised/chided for what is said/presented while the other has people praised/chided for what has previously been said/presented regardless of quality, only valued by the average idiots opinion.

I'm not even sure which is which here, personally i use Reddit for porn, news about certain comnunities and looking at cool pictures

I use Veeky Forums for getting into arguments with random permavirgins and for weirder porn

I don't see why anyone would view either sites as anything more than fun little timewasters

>We're all shit people talking about games, whatever site we're using
Equally good point.

What isn't a good point is advocating to subject yourself to a worse variety of shit just because.

I never really understood the whole aversion to going to a LGS purely to play a system with strangers. I guess it's because I only play Wargames like Bolt Action and Drop Zone that I've never dealt with the real dregs. I've seen plenty huddled around tables playing 40k, magic or some other weeb card game but never interacted directly I mean I work a blue collar job and don't have any friends to play with so it's like my only option.

Now DnD is a whole other thing. I can't imagine doing a PUG for that.

Try and get in touch with the new guy if he was decent, start something yourselves.

>She can return to my forward base, ahuehuehue

There's a woman who works at my local GW in Shrewsbury sometimes and people treat her fine for the most part.

Only time I've ever seen someone come close to insulting her is when some girls came into the store to get out of the rain and one of them said "I thought only boys liked this?"
Even then it really wasn't that bad and she didn't lose her cool at all. I went down there just recently for the Triumvirate release and we just chatted for a while about the new Celestine model.

how do you people put up with 40k players?

can a guards lieutenant fall in love with the emperor's finest?

they're an unfortunate necessity since they form the majority of the store's income

I don't believe obvious fabrications online

This.
I've seen shit players and people, but they exist, and it isn't the internet.

Whilst you may have money to afford a same hour courier delivery for when you are after something quickly, most others live in reality.

unfortunately the gaming corner of my LGS always smells like sweaty armpits and doritos on friday night.

Not LGS, but:
>friend of a friend has gaming den
>offers to teach me to paint minis there
>OK
>painting shittily when his friends arrive to play 40k
>two guys look and act normal, third is a suspicious neckbeard
>beard starts losing and complaining right away
>yelling about the rules, even argues about Ork cohesion even though all players have mureens on the field
>starts yelling loudly about women and SJWs when I try to make polite conversation with the other regulars

Thank fuck my friends are fairly normal at least.

why is there always that one rude, complaining guy and why do the groups always invite him over again

it's a common thing for nerds to be bad at saying no to people in social groups, comes from a past of being shunned socially

if this is the place where superior nerds come to post about horrible neckbeards, where do the actual bleeding gum catpissmen post?

>where do the actual bleeding gum catpissmen post?
Right here, they just choose to exclude how they're the same.
It's about trying to feel better about yourself.

>We are not LGS crowd

>Implying Veeky Forums doesn't fawn over a tripcode that claims to be/is female in awkward ways
>implying Veeky Forums doesn't talk shit about female guardsmen, woman as warriors etc
>Implying Veeky Forums doesn't take every chance they can to comment of women in pictures being 'thicc', having child bearing hips, and other stuff like that
>implying Veeky Forums doesn't take every chance to enter their magical realm, make sex jokes (or not even jokes) and proclaim loudly everything's their fetish

Face it, average Veeky Forums is worse than LGS crowd.

You're speaking like you're not involved in any of this.

>Myself and six friends buy packs to play some Booster draft in the back room
>Halfway through the game we're told to leave to make room for the cashiers loitering friends to eat some chicken they brought in f from popeyes
>Nah
>Booted

And that's why we now subsidize our local comic shop with bulk MTG purchases and our FLGS had to move into one of those external school classrooms converted into a store.

I know its great. I as a britbong personally , am glad to see it written down.

What horrible city? I don't want to ever go there.

Reddit

OK, seriously, are American LGS really this shit?

> Reddit
REEEEEEE NORMIES GET OUT

>Implying that's not a loud minority
>Implying that most people don't shun those retards
>Implying that it's not just /r9k/ shitposting
>Implying that they warrant any attention other than being told to fuck off

No. Though it depends on the state and what the store specializes in. Stores that are almost solely card games are pretty awful while specialty stores (excluding GW but there are some exceptions) are generally pretty good.

Shout out to GW Banbury, UK. Best GW I've ever been to.

Wooooh yay! I love that store.

This. CCG players are fucking subhuman.

I sure do miss when the store was packed and we were all doing a huge End Times battle before they axed fantasy.

Made being stationed in the UK worth it.

Honestly, just hearing 'Friday Night Magic' is enough to give me a stroke. Rest of the week all the CCG players keep to themselves and don't cause any trouble beyond occasionally pestering other customers, but once Friday hits and enough people are in the store, all fucking hell breaks loose.

It's kind of like when you pass by a hen night, there's always one or more lasses shouting 'I'M SOOOO DRUNK' and making as huge a scene as possible for the sake of making a scene. Once the number of players is enough that you've got to raise your voice to be heard, there's always a bunch of sweaty pricks who begin deliberately shitting things up for no reason other than they can. Nothing quite ends the working week like Monster and Pringles thoroughly worked into every square-inch of carpet.

At least a couple of players seemed sincerely apologetic about what their mates did, mind you. They even came the next morning and offered to help clean up.

>tfw FLGS is connected to the old model train store so there are lots of Dad types to subconsciously shame the manchildren into behaving

Feels good.

>start playing magic in college
>Have my super sweet all cascade deck
>It's just cascade spells, ramp and some fatties
>Elderscale wurm, some vanilla stuff and a Karn I got back when he was 10$
>Go home, friends tell me there's an LGS 15 minutes away now
>We go, owners are cool
>MTG, Warhammer, usual LGS stuff plus a retro games section
>Shitty ps2 games mostly
>Friends ask me if I want to do a multiplayer game with the locals
>Owner tells me to just roll with Sid the sloth, he's a little slow
>Sit down, me two friends and a guy.
>Seems all there
>Then so.e hamplanet, is this him?
>Nope, he's Charles, cool guy that shares snacks, gave me a mountain dew
>3rd guy sits, eyes going in two directions with crooked as fuck teeth
>Looks like Sid the sloth from ice age
>Tells me his cleric deck has some custom cards because Reid Duke told him they were bad so it's okay
>Notice there's six of us
>Someone breaks out the planeschase deck
>SweetJesushearmyprayers.jpg
>Sid reveals Xantanos, God of lightness and dark
>1/3 cleric god for WB7, affinity for clerics, tap to prevent 3 damage, reveal from your opening hand for a mother of runes token that's also a clearic
>SweetJesusdoesntcare.jpg
>Game starts, nobody has removal beyond my 2 bounce spells and a 4 damage spell
>Planeschase deck fucks over everyone except me and Sid.
>Has a ton of custom cards
>cleric token makers
>4/4 protection from Non clerics for 4
>The actual cleric combo where all damage is redirected to an indestructible cleric
>It gets down to me and him
>Plane where instants and sorceries hit all possible targets
>Deny reality, cascade 3, bounce all permanents
>Get up to Karn with 4 ramp spells off cascaded jank while he plays lands one by one
>Exile stuff, 3-4 things under Karn
>Reset the game with his God thing, an elderscale wurm and a piece of his combo
>Gets up looking angry, shoving loose cards into his bag
>"I don't play with people who use Karn in their deck"

>over a decade ago
>be like 12
>2nd match of 40k ever
>pair up with some 15 year old autist that literally dipped his blood angels in red paint and called it a day
>not very good because only second match ever
>guy is berating me at every turn for making errors
>eventually wipe his death company and captain
>lmfao dude you suck
>he picks up his dudes and leaves
Im still astounded people like him exist

Huh, that's a friend of mine. Small world.

Here's a story about the time that I was That Guy, at least from their perspective

>Work for the county as a fire ordinance inspector (aka fire marshal's lackey with the clipboard)
>Pudgy teenager with those pants with the chains lights up inside the store
>Put that out, you can't smoke in here
>The owner says I can smoke in here
>He can't tell you that
>Owner says it's fine for him to smoke
>YOU can't tell him that
>Literally inside a store full of inflammable paints, books and poison fume expelling plastic, adjacent a used bookstore
>You're being a dick please leave
>Mark them for an inspection
>violations and fines out the ass

Needless to say I'm not welcome at that particular store anymore.

>Even though the Brits pronounce it that way
The Brits, Aussies, Kiwis and pretty sure the Canadians...
I think it's just the USA that doesn't.

>While the firstborn Vostroya will always be recruited I believe it has happend that other daughters and sons would join up.
Would they have different regiments though? Since the well known Vostroyan regiments are called the Firstborn and all.

>Don't work where people might be arseholes.
Suck your head in. People are fuckwits everywhere.

>Implying that Veeky Forums is one person.
There's some of the dregs and some decent types on here. At least two posters of each.

You're the good kind of dick
Like, you were a dick but you did the right thing

Thank you for caring about people safety, asshole

You did nothing wrong, the place was a clear fire hazard

>>Compresses his body to place himself between us, pulling his arms in like he's trying to catch a closing elevator
>>Smells like peppermint and ass
>>"Excuse me madam, I overheard you talking about Warhammer! Pray tell, what faction do you play?"
Smooth operator

You have the most super-chill friend. Were you in there on Fall of Cadia release day chatting with Brian? I may have seen you...

Somehow there's an even deeper pit to live in than Veeky Forums.

>>Hambeast turns out to have been legit sumo at one point
For some reason I found that part hilarious.

>"heavily homebrewed eleven-player Dark Souls-inspired Pathfinder campaign with minor romance elements"

>minor romance elements
Why does anyone do this? Even here on Veeky Forums with "lewd" games? A romance subplot is almost always terrible in every type of media, why hamfist that shit into roleplaying?