How to kill space marines

Using a captive bolt gun, apply the muzzle of the device to the Space Marine's forehead and pull the trigger. This kills the Space Marine

Other urls found in this thread:

warhammer40k.wikia.com/wiki/Emperor's_Peace
twitter.com/SFWRedditGifs

>implying the marine wouldn't be able to tear your arm off and beat you to death with it before you pulled the trigger

It'd trash the bolter and your hand as well probably, since bolts are explosive rounds.

Space marines can be killed by captive bolt guns, the same modern technology that they use in slaughterhouses to kill cows.

>its not a bolter

How do I get rid of the body?

Okay, cool, that might work. But how do you plan on getting close enough to a Space Marine to use it, and how do you keep the Space Marine still long enough to do so?

That's a more complex question and will depend on numerous factors. One option that you could pursue (if time permits and you have a freezer on hand) is to eat it.

Okay how do you do that when the Space Marine isn't kneeling perfectly still, wearing a helmet, and even with a helmet off, can spit at you and melt through your face with acid saliva?

Space marines often don't wear helmets

Depending on the Astartes in question, this is not a recommended course of action. Mutation and/or Chaos corruption would probably do a number on you. That aside... would the genetic enhancements of a space marine poison you, or give you extra nutrients? How would you carve the flesh around the black carapace? Once the marine is dead, would their acidic saliva begin to break them down or make their flesh unsafe, similar to some animal toxins? I wonder if those extra organs would be worth eating, or if they'd be dangerous to eat (like polar bear livers). What would gene-seed taste like? Considering all the differences, how would a space marine taste compared to a human? Hmm....

I swear I'm not a canabalistic serial killer yet.

shit thread

...

Okay, who let the /pol/tards out of their containment board again?

I did kek though.

...

...

someone with a sense of humour

I voted for Trump, /pol/tard joke was too good though.

...

...

cease these jests before my sides burst asunder

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

Nobodies asked the most important question yet, so I guess I'll ask it: How hard do I have to hit a space marine with my car to kill him?

...

Depends... is he, or is he not, wearing power armor?
If he's wearing power armor, you split your car in half.
If he's not wearing power armor, you totaled whatever you were driving if it was smaller than a truck.
If he's not wearing power armor and you're driving a good-sized vehicle - pretty damn hard, I'd say.

but if you do away with representative voting and just making it a straight popular vote without paying any attention to what county or state each vote comes from then that shit doesn't matter

Not that user,
But that's not how the system works (and I wish it did).

Most of them were bad, now I'm out.

Ah, what I wouldn't give to be a 14 year old /b/tard again so I could laff like an idiot at all this blatant shitposting.

Yes, because central California comunists should have as much voting power as the rest of the US combined. That's how cultural and political norms work.

> If he's not wearing power armor and you're driving a good-sized vehicle - pretty damn hard, I'd say.
New question - how do I sneak up on a space marine while going like 80 KPH in a truck?

But that's exactly what people mean when they say "get rid of the electoral college"

We don't vote by fucking square footage

relax u fucking neckbeard

California literally already has more voting power than any other state in the nation and it's always blue. Always. No matter how shitty the Democratic candidate is they've got one fifth of the votes they need in the bag, every fucking time.

If it was a straight popular vote then the conservatives in California would actually have a vote that counts.

>I lost my sense of humor
>shitposts no longer fulfill me
>I must insult everyone who still enjoys it because I'm old and salty
>and assert how mature I am by calling them idiotic 14-year old /b/tards

Either find a Noise Marine who's already been deafened by the WUB-WUB or hope he's distracted.

Don't think anyone here's opposed to get rid of it, user.

Are the Russians using Mig21s in Syria?

I know they wanted to spend all their old bombs, but damn.

While completely marginalizing everyone else. The reason a purely popular vote does not work for the United States is because we have the land mass, population, and diversity of several countries all under one government. The president doesn't represent just the "average" American, he has to represent both sides of an incredibly polarized nation with radically different ideals. If you had a straight popular vote then of course the areas in the US with the highest populations would matter even more than they already do. Why would you need to appeal to ten thousand people in Wyoming when you have millions in California? Even though those two groups have vastly different priorities, ideals, and policies a popular vote would average them down until nothing remained of the minority.

>tfw you realize that California is only ~51% Democrat
Even in the places where no one lives, there's still a shitload of people there. A straight popular election would give the Democrats more power overall, but if you were then to remove California, it wouldn't change anything. Meanwhile, if you were to remove California's electoral votes, it would be damn near impossible for the Republicans to lose an election.

Actually that wouldn't work because of space marines super bones which tank small arms fire.

But in reality, you'd ignore the fuck out of both Wyoming and California because neither one of them are swing states and it would be a waste of your fucking time to do anything but fundraise there.

And I fail to see how "popular vote would favor high-population areas" is an argument when that's what the electoral college already does. Again, California has 55 electoral votes. That's 11 more than the combined votes of the 12 least populous states. 13 if you count DC. It's already heavily in favor of the big states, but the minority political party in each state just gets a big fat "fuck you" in place of a vote that counts. How's that better?

I doubt it, they get nails in the head for fun.

The EC favors smaller states rather than larger states.
Compare population vs number of electors and you'll find that the vote of a person in a highly populated state (such as California) is worth far less than that of someone in a sparsely populated state (like Wyoming).

But keep whining how a state with over 12% of the population of the US has 10% of the electors.

>He doesn't know what service studs are.
Play nicely Veeky Forums.

shoot em with enuff dakka, or krump em with somefin choppy enuff

warhammer40k.wikia.com/wiki/Emperor's_Peace
"There are multiple ways for the Apothecary to do this; the two most often applyied are either a violent removal of the affected Space Marine's progenoid gland, which destroys both his hearts and lungs in the process;

or the use of a euthanasia tool known as a Reductor. This wrist-mounted device that is part of an Apothecary's Narthecium incorporates a powerful spring-loaded piston, which is applied to the wounded Astartes' temple and depressed, caving his head in and causing massive damage to his brain.


In both cases, death is almost instantaneous and causes no further suffering to the dying Space Marine. "

WHO LET THE /POL/TARDS OUT
WHO WHO WHO WHO
WHO LET THE /POL/TARDS OUT
WHO WHO WHO WHO.

WTH OMG BBQ

>all these posts
>nobody mentions it
For fuck's sake.

Captive bolt guns are for stunning prior to slaughter, not killing an animal outright. Kill yourself for making such an elementary mistake.

There are two different types of captive bolt guns, penetrating and non-penetrating. Non-penetrating captive bolt guns are the stunners you are talking about, penetrating bolt guns kill.

Wait, that song says "who"? I thought those were supposed to be barking noises

Jesus H. Christ, man. Penetrating captive bolt guns leave the brain stem intact so that the heart continues to pump while it's being bled.

Really either type may or may not actually be lethal (penetrating types would generally cause lethal injuries) but the purpose is essentially to cause the animal to be both unconscious but also for its heart to still be beating when you cut its throat a few seconds later.

The bolt gun is entirely likely to kill the animal, but the goal is for the cause of death to be exsanguination from having its throat cut before the brain injury would actually "kill it".

Is it accurate to say that an animal is alive, because its heart is still beating when its brain has been effectively destroyed?

Yes.

No they said who.

>he took the time to quote all those posts.
You might actually be retarded. But at least you're dedicated to your retardation. Godspeed, user.

The OIE defines death as the irreversible loss of brain activity demonstrable by the loss of brain stem reflexes.