Greetings! After dealing with the invaders to our galaxy, and paying for repairs of the main station...

The IOM has killed trillions, and it must be stopped.

There are more than a handful of threads which deserve way more to be kept on trash.

nice attempt, but my commissar told me that tzaangors are crafty and devious

Oh. One of those photonic beings. Our research team made first contact with them, just before their ship vanished.

You are part of this... Imperium that you speak of, do you not. We will stop your despotic government in it's tracks. No more shall be purged. Expect us.

Your commisaar is a liar. We ahave heard you worship technology, and you treat AI is if it were your gods. You do not know what it is. You serve a corrupt regime, one dotted with the blood of innocents. You represent stagnation, and decay. We will save the Milky Way from you scum.

kek.

Yeah, but we'll never be rid of the 40Kids.

I like 40k. But sometimes the whole heresy thing gets overused. That is why I tend to play Tau.

cont. They have a massive war machine, but they can be defeated. They have their elite space marines, with the best being the Ultramarines, as so called. They are immensely powerful, and not even our marines can take them down.

bumpbumpbump.

...

how to ruin the 99% of the depictions of sci-fi warfare.

>any species able to send large amounts of stuff into space (few hundred thousand tons at a minimum) is also able to accelerate an object to a low % of lightspeed and assfuck hundreds of planets a year.

>any species able to build starships would be able to equip there ships with powerful telescopes larger and better then anything on earth that can be used spot other starships, shipyards, instalations, inhabbited planets and so on from across galaxy and beyond and detect radiation emmited from an opposing vessel again, from across the galaxy and beyond.

Real world space warfare has the hypothetical potential to blow anything in 40k out of the water.

Yeah. That is why I don't like doing hard sci-fi.

Eh?! Y-you actually managed t' fight off all those shitbags fr'm th' last council?

Th-tha's fucking great! C'mere and have a drink. We were jus' *hic!* just drinkin' t' th' demise of another alien race- Guess we can't do that anymore, so HERE'S to yer survival! Woo!

Errywun's such huge JERKS around here like, 99% of the time, i's just... So... So good to know they din' get you too.

Lemme just sober up here an we can start mebbe talkin' about some kinda cultural exchange or trade deal... Where'sat bucket of water?

What? Where the- Do you know any information regarding the Imperium Of Man?

50,000 death guard, 10,000 armor and artillery are just a challenge to deal with.

...

GTFO faggot.

What fuckin' DON'T I know?! "An Empire of a million worlds," and all that crap. You can't swing a dead fucking cat without hitting them an' gettin' crusaded fer yer truble! Hol' on...

>Violent splash

FUCK ME that's cold-! Gah! Sorry about that. After they all left to try and destroy you last time I kind of figured, "Welp there goes another potential buddy. Better hold a wake," and kind of got carried away.

But yeah, Imperium. Don't even bother. I mean this is a people who'll utterly annihilate their own planets rather than see them fall; or throw literally hundreds of millions of men into a single, strategically unimportant world, just because they CAN and refuse to give up the ground. An entire GALAXY with 10,000 years of logistical infrastructure, geared solely towards fighting a war on every possible front. And now they've got genetically engineered DEMIGODS waking up to take charge. Last time those assholes were around, they went from a single world to ruling the GALAXY in a single generation. If you want my advice, seal the wormhole and leave them in their own galaxy to deal with their own problems and stew in their own juice.

Now then, as ambassador, I'm kind of obligated to ask if we can interest you in some very fine alienium crystals?

SQUATS GO HOME.

Good. We are planning on liberating worlds in the eastern fringes of the Ultima Segmentum. They pose a threat to us. We are forming a coalition, to save the galaxy.

I am ambassador Oros. We shall allow for the purchase of alienium crystals. Do you wish for trade links and a defensive pact?

>Empire of A Million Worlds
What! What the fuck did you say! A million! Kelgast Bless that's a lot! I gotta inform Command about that shit!

Genetically engineered demigods! HOW THE FUCK IS THAT POSSIBLE! I just thought they were a bunch of rednecks who worship some old man on life support! A GALAXY IN A SINGLE GENERATION! HOLY SHIT! Tell me more. Ambassador Oros and command are trying to hatch some half-assed plan to take over most of the eastern sectors in Ultima Segmentum, as they call it. They do not know of our presence.

The Hive has looked into the "Imperium of Man", the other representative exaggerates in areas. Their "Genetically engineered demigods" are roughly on par with The Hive's "Gene-Warrior" program designed to enhance the Warrior Caste.

Moreover this "Imperium" spread across the stars over tens of thousands of years before their previous civilization as brought down as their method of FTL experienced.....disruptions, the "conquer the galaxy in a single generation" was them simple reuniting their lost worlds, and taking advantage of the fact no one else had done the same yet.

Yeah, you have fun with that. Don't get me started on the toys their crazy machine-worshippers can use but not even MAKE anymore. They've FORGOTTEN more about weapons of mass destruction than the most advanced species in my galaxy even knows! They can SET DARK MATTER ON FIRE for fuck's sake and did it just to see if it'd work!

If you want to trade and talk, we're fine with that, but I'd have to be mad to commit my people to a war we're sure to not only lose but be exterminated by.

Yeah, you're telling me. And that's not even counting the worlds lost and forgotten about by ROUNDING ERRORS in their bureaucracy! The only thing saving the universe from them sometimes is their own inefficiency...

I'll have to call back to Hanaris Prime for word on a defensive pact, but trading I am fully prepared to negotiate for. What have you got on offer?

Beats the hell out of me! That old man's the one that made the buggers, ten thousand years ago and they're all still in their prime! And yeah, most of them are just jobbers with some pretty good laser weapons, but you're not accounting for their elite troops. Just one of them reacts fast enough to dodge gauss weaponry, wears armour that'd make a medium tank blush and carries fucking TERROR WEAPONS like a fully-automatic RPG that only detonates AFTER it penetrates a live target, or a fucking CHAINSAW SWORD. How that even WORKS is beyond me, but they're obviously weapons designed to terrify and over-awe the enemy by sheer violence!

The IoM is MENTALLY UNHINGED I tell ya! Ten thousand years of constant war has given the whole goddamn species a list of mental disorders not limited to EXTREME SOCIOPATHY as long as my arm!

Death guard are cybernetically augmented, emperors centurions are cloned or from elite warriors. We have actual marines who are genetically modified.

Yes, but I beiebe that my assistent can be exxagerating a little bit. We have weapons, the capability, armor, and of course we can seal the wormhole if necessary.

We are willing to give you a stream of neutronium and Nano-Duranium armor in exchange for this.

Fuck, the las ttime someone burned dark matter is when tje emitre Taros system blew up. Gods, well. We encountered the Imperium once. The survey ship IPN Uriinor was destroyed by a Dauntless light cruiser. It responded with 'FOUL XENO SCUM! YOU WILL BE PURGED WITH THE HELLFIRES OF PROMETHIUM! BY THE EMPERORS LIGHT!".

The only survivors wer being hunted down by members of the "Emperors sycthes". We took them down easily.

Oweeeeee Human? Man? n-never heard of it by the omniscient I haven't!!! I don't even know what that is, I don't look like nothin of what your describing yes sir-ee!!

I have to.. go, i'll be back though, catch ya later.. ,lemme know how that "human" thing turns out!

Your an idiot. You are human! Just that you are beneath all these implants. Also
>Guards come forward, cock their shotguns
You need to come with us.

...

Again, fuck off you /b/tard.

nope! nonsense! look at all the squishy bits i don't have, i don't look anything LIKE this crudely drawn illustration of the masterly human design.

Really, also, doctor, please take off the special glasses. You are in our test chamber. You will give us information about the IOM. We also need new biology textbooks thanks to your form.

You still have a heart, and an appendix.

>fags who can't close a tab and browse another thread

Come on now birdface, I know not of which you speak, for all inquisitives about terrestrials of that nature though, my dear servit- ahem servant friend "Plasma-Cannon John 34-b" will gladly tell you all he knows.

Nope,
>searches all compartments
Just as I thought! You bastard! It's a beacon! The Imperiums on it's way!.

The Imperium, motherfucker. Tell me all about the goddamn thing!

VOX ARE POX REMOVE BIRD

We have met Terrans before. In our own galaxy, survivors from generation ships from this galaxy.
Remove yourselves from our premises. Also, the inquisition is probably gonna geld you soon, so yea.

>static
Help, can anybody hear me?
We located the frequency of this conversation, however we're not sure if our transmitters are powerful enough to transmit this message.

We have encountered the empire you know as the Imperium of Man. However it has come at a great cost, they've wiped out a majority of our empire and race. Only a few fringe colonies remain.

We believe they were drawn to us when we uncovered an ancient artifact of human origin on our homeworld. However there's something strange about it. It appears to be older than what you've dated the Imperium itself to be.

We have more information but first we require assistance in evacuating our remaining population to a safer location. We believe they are still hunting us.

We can transport your population to the andromeda galaxy, or better yet canis major.

We are sending in refugee ships to your worlds immediatly, with orders to depart immediatly towards wormhole one. You will be allowed refuge in our empire.

Be careful. The Astartes are ruthless, sadistic killers.

They should be here now. We are readying a fleet to take you out of the region. Follow our lead, we need your forces to help with our escape.

Thank the gods someone heard!

We are very greatful for this, but be careful for we've located Imperial patrols within the nebula we're taking refuge in.

As for the information we found, we believe there might be two distinct forces within the Imperium, and that they don't get along well. We also still have the artifact and will try to decode the information within it.

Yes.
>SIR! TWELVE DAUNTLESS CRUISERS APPROACHING!
Take them down. Fire.

Here, hold this ancient artifact for me.

We call it a 'Teleport Homer'.

Be careful, we've located a particularly powerful ship in the vicinity. We classified it as an "Ark Mechanicus" class ship based on intercepted transmissions pertaining to it.

...

They could also go ahead and construct this bad boy and make tzeentch into their bitch.
youtube.com/watch?v=Ef-mxjYkllw&t=1258s

Again, there is all sorts of hardcore bullshit you can make in hard sci-fi.

Yes, and here on earth we are never gonna have boots on the ground OORAH in a serious war.