Stat me Veeky Forums

Stat me Veeky Forums

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All points in Crazy. Specialized in Like a Fox.

Is this the best potion on the market

Wait, I thought this guy was actually crazy. Is it all an act to get people to buy his supplements? That's crazy.

His show is 100% just marketing shit for profit. He pushes chemtrails so you'll need to buy special air filters.

Large Magical Beast
Hit Dice: 5d10+25 (52 hp)
Initiative: +1
Speed: 30 ft. (6 squares)
Armor Class: 15 (-1 size, +1 Dex, +5 natural), touch 10, flat-footed 14
Base Attack/Grapple: +5/+14
Attack: Claw +9 melee (1d6+5)
Full Attack: 2 claws +9 melee (1d6+5) and bite +4 melee (1d8+2)
Space/Reach: 10 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks: Improved grab
Special Qualities: Scent
Saves: Fort +9, Ref +5, Will +2
Abilities: Str 21, Dex 12, Con 21, Int 2, Wis 12, Cha 10
Skills: Listen +8, Spot +8
Feats: Alertness, Track
Environment: Temperate forests
Organization: Solitary, pair, or pack (3-8)
Challenge Rating: 4
Treasure: None
Alignment: Always neutral
Advancement: 6-8 HD (Large); 9-15 HD (Huge)

That's depressing, but to be expected.

STR 11
DEX 8
CON 12
INT 7
WIS 6
CHA 18

He's not that strong, he can't even open a pickle jar.

No one can, those things are sealed by eldritch powers.

Where do all the pickes come from then?

Thats humanity!

Warlocks

I like how you disagreed with the slightly more than average strength, but the nigh-superhuman charisma stat raised no questions

Level 1 Humble Water Filter Merchant

I dont know why people mock him. Average person sounds more insane than him. They just don't have a show to broadcast it.

weather he wants to be or not he's entertaining as all hell.

youtube.com/watch?v=sUIcCyPOA30

Are you sure?

>I dont know why people mock him. Average person sounds more insane than him. They just don't have a show to broadcast it.
>Average person sounds more insane than him.

Ever considered to change your social circle? Maybe join a club? Or some kind of sports team?

Not him, but the average person thinks and does some pretty retarded shit.

>I dont know why people mock him.
I tried watching his show a while back, to see what the fuzz is about. In the time I gave him my ear, I listened to him interviewing an author who claimed that the world was run from Hollywood by a secretive cabal of druids, I heard out some guy who insinuated that Joe Biden was sexually attracted to infants, I heard it said that sexual education in schools is a pedophiliac agenda, I sat through an "emergency transmission" in which Alex Jones claimed that the American state apparatus would plant and detonate a low-yield tactical nuke in Washington, D.C., to assassinate Donald Trump on his inauguration day, and so on.

If you can't see why the average person would mock him for this, then I really don't know what to tell you.

>STR 11
>DEX 8
>CON 12

>STR 11
>DEX 8
>CON MAN
>INT 7
>WIS 6
>CHA 18
FTFY

>stat me
The stats for a Troll should work perfectly.

I considered creating a setting based on a literal interpretation of Alex Jones' crazy rantings.

With psychic vampire pedophiles and an intellectual illuminati that are in contact with extradimensional aliens.

As someone working on an x-files inspired mini-campaign, i feel like he's a goldmine

If you ever listen to him talk outside the context of particularly crazy rants he's clearly not unintelligent, his memory for facts is fucking outstanding actually and most of his crazy ranting is actually quite factual and has sources to back it up and only sounds bizarre because he uses really strange metaphors all the time.

He does seem to have a really bad habit of believing things that people claiming to have insider knowledge have personally told him and then links up their bullshit with his unusually good memory and throws out a bunch of absurd conclusions about weather control machines.

Species: Human

Are you sure about that? Alex always says that when someone is really insistent that something is true, assume that you're being lied to.

>Average person sounds more insane than him.
I.....i dont know what to say, where do you live?