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Okay Veeky Forums

All of your miniatures have come to life now. They have all of their powers and their weapons are fully functional....

....but they're still the size of a miniature and their firepower is scaled down. They all want to kill you. Can you win?

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Radiation burns, probably poisoning. Collecting Skitarii would hurt.

Of course, only the Transuranic Arquebus would have the range for it. Everything else I probably have covered by just throwing things at them.

I mean, you'd basically be an Emperor-class titan in relative scale, and anything you throw at this - y'know, like a literal pie plate - is basically a D-weapon. Unless they have something like a D-weapon themselves that would actually be as powerful as a real-life gun, you're probably fine.

Got a picture of them?

I don't own any miniatures. Too poor.

Not many on hand, I mostly play. Also, not many painted, and I only really share pictures of WIP stuff that's either painted or a neat conversion that's in progress.

Also, come to think of it, they also pack a lot of Taser weapons, but at that scale even a deadly shock might be nothing more than a small sting. Good thing I didn't give any of the Transonic weapons.

Easily. They have 6" movement and 24" range. Walk slowly backwards and throw shit at them until they're all dead.

Completely fucked. Assuming I'm some kind of titan-sized gargantuan creature with T 12 or something, I still have about 50 deathwatch veterans firing poison rounds at me, and like 200 orcs and goblins fucking up my feet while night lords dance around my head firing meltaguns at my face.

My biggest fear is when the daemon prince casts Treason of Tzeentch. I wouldn't take that fight.

>their firepower is scaled down

I'm pretty sure a 28mm missile launcher, heavy bolter, and reaper autocannon would be enough to blast open my throat and kill me outright.

It's 28mm on the miniature?

I knew I shouldn't have bought a dozen mantas.

Now I'm glad that Living Lightning is only 18" range and not unlimited.

Well, they're all stuck inside cardboard boxes. So It probably wouldn't be a probOH SHIT ALL THE XWINGS!

Actually now that I think about it, the bigger problem would be what would happen when the Battlefleet Gothic ships all crash at the same time. The scale of how big of an explosion they make when they go up is always been a bit vague.

>have a Knight Models Bane (from the movie) sat next to my laptop
>grab needle-nose pliers
>pull his mask off

How big is that model anyway?

Turned into Swiss cheese. Even at scaled down velocity a railgun projectile is moving at fuckoff velocity. And it can peg me from across the room.

>Have dozens of Zaku's variations and a HG Hi-nu.
>400 pts Haqq's, 1000 pts Capitol and 1600 pts worth of Skitarii

I'll die with a stream of funnel's beams to the heart, and then burned by radiation fire.

This sounds familiar.

fanfiction.net/s/5474237/1/40k-ToyHammer

I have dark eldar, they'd probably rape me in my sleep or poison me.

I'd probably feel even guiltier than I already do for throwing them all out a week ago.

He's a big guy

No language created by human beings is capable of articulating how utterly sick I am of that meme.

If we only count fully assembled and painted, then I'll be fine. If we expand that out to assembled and above, things are going g to go bad very quickly.

Cult Ambush would make life really annoying very quickly.

orkz, they don't stand a chance

Well considering a leman Russ looks like it fires a shell that would be equivalent to a 9mm bullet, no I would be dead. But my falling body would crush most of my guardsmen leaving them with severe losses.

The opportunity presented itself and I took it.

i hate you

I hate me too, user.

Don't, please.

I can't hate someone like that, even if they do have terrible taste in memes. No sport in it.

Don't worry man, its only 9mm.

>tfw have a crusader statue from Rome
>tfw he's defended me from kebab for years on my bookshelf
>tfw having to kill him

>Collecting Nurgle.
>Firepower Reduced

Can't really reduce the effects of unbelievable amounts of disease, so I imagine that no, winning is not in the cards.

PFFFT yeah because I run Deathwing so oh so terminators

Fuck, I guess thousand sons would still be mean business

Khorne daemnkin, Haemonculus covens, some Orks and 3 flesh eater courts start collecting, If the bats don't kill me I think I can run away from the ensuing clusterfuck.

>All FW Raven Guard
"Shit, where have they all gone!?"

>tfw I have 70+ necrons

One of them rolls a 6 and I'm fucking dead.

I play Mobile Frame Zero. I get to die happily while being murdered by cute little lego mecha.

What if somebody else hated him
for you

>Khorne Bloodbound/Slaves to Darkness
I'll be fine, some cuts to my feet maybe. Good thing my hellcannon isn't finished yet.

Ooh, you clever little bastard...

I'm not worried about my tau army, I'm more worried about my Airfix bombers and tamiya tanks. but then again I could pray the 7th armoured division and the WW2/Cold war RAF team up and the fight the tau.

You've been shot by a 9mm before?

/k/ meme

Thousand sons would fuck me totally with a psychic storm or some shit.

What if your mind is too big for them?

Their combined efforts, which burn out scores of thralls, manage to give you a slight headache.

>eaten by a horde of miniature scarabs
alternatively
>Cryptek sees you
>get captured and turned into a Necron superweapon

>thinking about collecting Orks
>paint myself green
>I IZ DA BIGGEST AND DA STRONGEST DERE IS!
>LETZ GET DIS WAAAAGH!!! STARTED! WAAAAAAAAAGH!!!

The two Vindicators lying right in front of me on my desk with their barrels facing me kill me before I can figure out what happened.

gg

Brutally kunning, da git.

My nigga. I'm actually more worried about the lasers on my dune crawlers that the vanguards cancer guns.

It would be more interesting to seem what happens if they just try to survive.
>1 squad of ww2 germans and brits for operations quad (~15 models each)
>~20 X-Wing ships
>~platoon of imperial guard +Leman Russ +Sentinel +10 halflings
>a handful of space police and wastland mutants
>10 nurgle orcs and 3 trolls
>skiatrii sc! box
>death mask harlequins + another box of them
>fellowship of the ring +theoden +box of rohirim cav
>15 desert orks
>about 5k points of AoS VC

They're not miniatures but um... now my Bionicles are destroying the universe.

Were also a hell of a lost faster and more mobile and agile, imagine putting on some football or hockey gear and making a running dive at your army as it marches around the corner.

You would crush any greater demon, grilyman or any other primarch miniature like it was nothing.

Crush titans and move too fast for them to bring their guns to bear, with speed and agility that none your size could ever hope to match that wouldnt seem possible from their perspective.

You would be the most fearsome battle terror they have ever seen, have fun with it.

If you have orks after a little bit of time try and convince them youre Gork / Mork cus of how killy you are.

Only the painted ones comes to life r... right?

Aw shit I got tons of those.

They wouldn't count for this....I think.

Seeing as i nasically have a dark angels legion probably no

Why do you ask?

Let's say in one situation only the finished ones do, in another they ALL come to life.

I keep my admech in my computer/gaming room. They'll be busy worshipping it long enough for me to get out.

I think both Magnus and my Warlord titan could solo me fairly easily.

the unpainted ones are extra fucking pissed you didn't finish them

Well, they're all in storage, so I should be ok, but the rats in the attic are fucked...

3500 points of Space Marines.
1000 points of Guard.
1300 points of Khorne.
2000 points of Thousand Sons.

Yea... i wouldn't last an hour.

It's dark Eldar. They'd do both.

...and then in two days we have full-sized Tyranids running rampant across the planet and humanity is extinct in a month.

Well this is making me rethink having my orks on the shelf next to the gun safe, that's for sure.

>Two necron overlords with tachyon arrows
I am oh so very dead.

Having to deal with a fist sized beholder flying around and blasting everything would be awesomely awful

Well I just got all if my kingdom death put together so

I'll die with an erection at least

Man the Boys was an awesome comic.

Brutal, mindnumbing. It was like Doom, but with superheroes.

>200+ 1/600 scale WWII and WWI aircraft
>1/72 scale modern helicopters stacked with hellfire missiles, rocket pods and gatling guns
>more than 100 1/72 tanks from WWII
>Endless infantry from WWI, WWII
>30+ 1/72 Field guns, including heavy artilery

I'm pretty fucked. The Japanese aircraft would kamikaze my eyes. Even if its just 5 ml of burning petrol, it would still hurt in my eyes.

The modern hellfire missiles would be what really scares me though... my skin will be no match. Likely the 1/600 scale aircraft will be more of a slow death like being stung to death by 200 bees - with tiny 20mm cannons

Slann would just melt my mind so I'm fucked

>half a dozen raiders fly straight towards me, stabbibg me to death with shock prows

Underrated post

I play goblins so I could take them until the spider riders come in. And the arachnorok.

>*muffled cries of models begging to be put together*

This right fucking here.

My artillery train would probably hurt like fuck

...

Bitch isn't this a Jojo stand?

I have a bunch a Dragons, some average forest monsters and a bloke with an over inflate ego who calls himself the "Forgotten King". I think they stand a chance.

Fly Swatter VS Blitza-bommer is a match-up I want to see.

Can you imagine if GW wrote a book about fighting their own miniatures?

I got an hige ammount of hero-clix miniatures, so I got no chance

Imperial Guard, half of the Leman Russes had at least a broken track due to transporting shenanigans, the valkyrie is in flames before taking off and half of the guardsmen are probably too scared to jump off the shelves without aerial support.

I think i got this.

>my orks (biggest army I have)
It probably wouldn't be too bad at first but once I kill them they multiply cause Orks (free minis?) and a feel like a powerklaw to the leg could knock you down regardless of the size. I may be screwed, I'll just hope that I am kunnin' enuf to defeat them.

>csm army
Really small like 1000 points so I could beat them. Daemon prince with wings might be a bit of a pest though.

>throws out minis
sell them you schmuck.

It's Tyranids, so my room is now full of bats that shoot machine guns that shoot tiny burrowing worms that eat your central nervous system.

This is a huge problem.

Actually, after reading others, maybe I should just go with painting myself green and becoming da biggest ork. Then we can take my Chaos together.

>immediately shot in the back of the head by 2 display cases full of Orks, Guardsmen, Napoleonic line infantry/cannons, and a company each of WWII Germans and Brits with armor support. Any that's BEFORE the majority of the Guard and more WWII Soviets and Krauts manage to open their travel boxes.

I'd say I'm fairly fucked even before the Vikings and Romans manage to get into range.

Why'd you do that?

kek

The poison of my huge Dark Eldar collection doesn't give two shits about how big or tough I am. Going to die a horrible, painful and slow death.

The plasma, melta, missiles and lascannons would hurt. I don't fancy being pelted by 7 Kheres cannons either. Everything else would probably feel like bee stings.

I have 3000pt of necrons.
I could throw shit at them, but again it's necrons.
They'll be back.
Tearing down the opposition at a molecular level. Monoliths, gates and god damn deepstriking Crypteks.
>I'll admit, it's a bit fucked.

>keep all my friends models at my house to make transport easier
It's only the miniatures I own that want to kill me r-right? The others want kill their owners and not me?

>The others want kill their owners and not me?

They'll force you to take them to their owners, and then kill you.

I got a Dark angels army and a Farsight army. The Dark angels got their hands on a baneblade and would chase me around with it while a stormsurge and three riptides shit on me. I would tell the Dark angels that the tau are harboring Fallen and quickly make my escape

Would he die?

I have been collecting, building and painting minis for all sorts of games and systems for 30 years.... I am in every sense of the word fucked.

My only hope would be to make a run for it and prey they are not able to track me down.

I own a warlord titan and two warhounds. I assume a volcano cannon, even tiny, is enough to vaporize large chunks of my body.