So let's dump some of the most bullshit high-level wizard / full-caster shenanegans you've come across. I'm thinking of D&D (any edition) / pathfinder in particular but hell I won't turn down good stories from any system.
I don't have a whole lot off the tip of my head myself, but I did just recently read about how a wizard could use a magically-reduced cone for a hat - in case of an antimagic field, the hat would de-shrink, form a barrier around the wizard, and break the line of sight to the wizard (and apparently therefore the antimagic field by RAW? idk), letting him make good his escape or do whatever he wanted, really.
And then there was something about stopping times and brewing bombs? i'm sure some fa/tg/uy has better info on that, it's been forever since I've seen it
This one time, this guy I knew played a level 17 wizard. Fucking cheesing gamebreaking munchkin, man.
Benjamin Perry
any stories in particular?
Jacob Barnes
1D4 chan has a couple of good articles about bullshit that wizards can do- here is a good example of a wizard doing what they do best for not entirely complete asshole reasons.
I can understand one, even two scratches, but eventually as a DM I would have rolled with it. Player ingenuity is a beautiful thing (and then maybe worked with the player to ride off the wizard gloriously into the sunset while still letting his legacy impact the game bc I don't know how to challenge a PC like that)
all hail Elsimore
Jordan Gray
Probably never happened.
Brody Thomas
>cast time stop >all motion seize >cant breathe, freeze to perfect zero, instant death
Aiden Watson
I don't think that's how the spell works.
Maybe if a wizard was trying to develop Time Stop and they rolled a 1 somewhere and the GM was arbitrarily a dick about it....
Gabriel Myers
I'd like to see this as well. I am about to make a wizard in Pathfinder and anything Paizo-built is fair game so I want to run something as broken as possible. I am not a complete newb to wizards but I really want to turn it up to 11 here, from 1st level onward if possible.
You're an idiot. That's not how the spell works at all. Read the description.
Michael Rivera
>Mage the Awakening I modified my hat with expanded capacity, a timeless interior, and a forces ability to drastically decrease its weight.
Then I filled it literally to the brim with rabbits.
Ryder Anderson
This is the most beautiful use of sorcery really. To use cosmic powers in order to achieve something completely arbitrary just for the sake of it.
Elijah Gray
Wouldn't the rabbits die of hunger soon enough? Or does timeless interior cover it?
Brody Fisher
>casts Hold Person >target is paralyzed, shits pants, dies because heart can't pump blood.
Austin Foster
Heh, been a while since I read this.
Jayden Hernandez
Timeless interior covers it. They don't starve, thirst, suffocate, or age.
Liam Perry
None of these stories happen. It's not it happening that matters. Just like the games you play, moron. What matters, is it a good story?
Charles Sullivan
Using 3.5, the Dream of Metal is the most awesome thing I've seen done with crazy magical bullshit. Won't link it here, but it's the first hit on Google for "the dream of metal". Fucking insane.
Logan Gomez
I think this fits
Blake Howard
>Be illusionist Wizard >Grab Uncanny Forethought >Can turn 3+ Int mod spell slots to cast any illusion spell with spell mastery >Shadowcraft Mage >Heighten Spell and Earth Spell >Easy Metamagic >metamagic school focus >Heighten silent image to 7th level and get +7cl due to earth spell >Can mimic any evocation and conjuration spell 2 levels above the spell slot i use 3 times a day. So 5th level slots = 7th level slots >Been using this mostly to summon rainbow unicorns and perform in my Circus >MFW GM gives me a belt that gives +4 int and +2 TO ILLUSION DCS
Jaxon Howard
The folks at GitP were able to fix/terraform the Dark Sun campaign setting with nothing but a 17th level Druid. Does that count?
I played a 4e Star Pact warlock and eventually became a literal Elder god if that counts.
Zachary Anderson
It does. Please elaborate.
Owen Long
So a system I've found to be good for bullshit is wild talents. If you can afford it, there's technically no power you can't build. What this means is you can use your budget to build a character that's arbitrarily strong at one thing, or shit at everything.
Where this reall gets interesting is when you theory craft a full party
Ex: these were talents built on a 125 budget (for reference, that's 5 points more than the books example of an FBI agent)
Talent one converted all organic matter into stone within an 40 yard radius of his target
Talent two converts inorganic matter into a hyperflammable gas
Talent three has a very simple fire ability. Doesn't really deal damage, but very reliable, and very high range. Also ignores armor
Talent 4 has on contact invisibility/intangibility
Even if you resisted the conversion powers, most didn't survive the resulting explosion, or suffocated.
At 250 points you can turn off the sun. But that's also /all/ you can do
Christian Peterson
Story time?
Joshua Baker
8/10 Pretty nifty read while I should have been studying for my midterms.
Why do you enable me user?
Colton Evans
Not a whole lot to say, the Star Pact had an epic destiny called Radiant One that culminated in your character ascending to the sky and becoming a star. Though, my character was actually an aasimar whose ancestor might not have been an angel, so the star he became was made of raw positive energy and generally did good stuff.
Blake Lee
>after the first couple guys to try invent that spell ended up like that, the other wizards developed ranged and trap versions as nosave insta-kills. What next?
William Cooper
It apparently takes five days for a rabbit to starve to death. More concerning would be the weight/heat of all those rabbits.
Adrian Thomas
>it's the "ridicule people because of their appearance" episode Stopped reading after the first paragraph. Those stories never happen.
Nathan Jenkins
Well, if you cast contingency with a timestop as the contingency and a timstop as the spell, you can timestop when enemies timestop and kick their face in.
But yeah, my wizard character is kind of problematic because why not teleport in, throw a Maximized Empowered Twin Ray Enervate up his ass and be done with him?
After this arc is done, I'm planning on talking to the GM and asking if I can change out to a warblade or warlock or something without losing my levels.
Liam Lewis
>It was I who stopped time! Are there any ways to summon big, bulky objects that can be used for transport other than a bag of holding filled with chariots or something?
Owen Walker
A dominated colossal creature of some kind, and then just cast Smoky Confinement on it when you don't need it. Then you just crack open your flask'o'monster, have it drag shit around, and then when you don't need it anymore, order it to fail its fort save and cast Smoky Confinement. It's like a genie!
Angel Myers
Discounting Omniscifier-esque theoretical op BS? Shapechange. Everything to do with that single fucking spell. It's more powerful than 99% of spells in the game in the hands of someone who knows what you can do with it - and it doesn't matter which sources are allowed because it's still busted in a core only game. But for example:
Immunity to all weapons but bludgeoning and you turn off magical enhancements? Yup, there's a form for that, Zodar, and it comes with massive stats and a free Wish that's not an SLA so Shapechange lets you use it. Automatically surprise enemies no matter what, which turns ambushes into you ambushing enemies regardless of what they do? Dire Tortoise form. Combine with Polymorph afterwards for extra cheese as you keep the effect while being in a form that can cast normally. 2 rounds of actions per turn? Cloakers and Chronotyryns, the former gets you 2 standards and the latter gets you 2 full rounds. Turn into a dragon and get solid all-round stats, flight, and breath weapons with varying effects.
Parker Murphy
>raw positive energy and generally did good stuff. I think you need to look into Positive energy corruption, Ashradorn, and Ragnorra user.So sorry.
Asher Nelson
A way to spam Time-Stop? You'll need to capture/kill an Aerodragon somehow, and those are fucking rare and hard to kill.
Hunter Scott
Constructed portals, rings of gate, and shit like that.
Fuck carrying it with it, just build a warehouse that connects to your portal.
Leo Butler
I feel your pain, m8. I really do.
Now go and study.
Grayson Kelly
I checked out The Dream of Metal.
If I ever get the chance to play instead of DM again I think I'm going to play a Traveler that somehow escaped.
Jack Lee
You cannot cast extra spells with haste, what the FUCK!? Good story otherwise.
Kevin Fisher
Can't you cast extra Quickened spells with it?
Brody Butler
Maybe.... I honestly can't remember. I think it only grants extra attacks within a full attack action. I dunno. Haste is fucky, I could be wrong. I just remember that came up recently in my 3.5 game.
Zachary Anderson
You could in 3.0.
Parker Bell
In fact I've known DMs who were like 'okay, we're converting 3.0 Haste to 3.5 instead of using 3.5 Haste'.
Because giving casters 2x the firepower per round is a good idea.
