Post Some Relavant NPC One-Liners

Need a bit of inspiration, Veeky Forums.

So I'm just starting out on making a megadungeon campaign as a bit of a pet project and I'm building up the run-of-the-mill humanoid enemies, I want to add a little flavor instead of just making them bags of hitpoints that just silently attack the players.

I want to make a list of quotes that they'd use while in combat, but I've been writing stat blocks and making maps for the past couple hours and I'm drawing some blanks on creative quotes. Could you post a few of your own ideas and maybe jump-start my own imagination?

Context
>biglargehuge dungeon
>cursed so that nothing within it can truly die, everything comes back to life a day or two after death
>intelligent humanoids come back completely insane from their experience, kind of like pic related, only less silly.
>most of the humanoid enemies are former adventurers that met this fate

Other urls found in this thread:

borderlands.wikia.com/wiki/Goliath
youtu.be/HuPOfWWdzcs
twitter.com/NSFWRedditVideo

"There must have been a door here when we came in"

Our party's powerful Sorcerer was trying to intimidate a hobgoblin lieutenant.

>Sorcerer: "you simpleton; you cannot begin to comprehend the power I wield!"
>Hobgoblin: "then why are you trying to gloat about it to me?"

The look on the player's face was priceless. He tried to think of a snappy comeback for 30 seconds before he just decided to kill the Hobgoblin. It was great.

>I'm not here for your loot
>better run, it's more fun that way
>I'm gonna split you open again and again and again
>kill me! Make it the last time I die!
>split the plate, flay the leather, shred the skin, slice the flesh, crush the bones!
>long pork walking!

idle talk:
"Maybe if I look hard enough, I'll find a door."
"What was her name again... what was I thinking about?"
"I wonder how Greg's doing. I hope he still doesn't hate me after I killed him. He did kill me first."
players sighted:
"Wait, I don't think these ones have died yet, let's change that, shall we?"
"Oh look, some meat bags, still resh from the surface"
combat chatter:
"Oh come on, why the struggle? It's not like you'll STAY dead."
"Oh, just give up already. It's just like ripping off a band-aid, just get it over with."
"Aren't at least a little bit curious what your insides look like? I know I am."
death:
"Seeya later"
"We'll finish this later."
"Aw, not again."
"Please let me die"
"Please let it stick this time."

Alternatively
>fighting PC
"I've been there, done that. It wasn't that bad."
"Don't bother digging a grave for [Player Character], he won't need one!"
"Oh goody! More to join the ranks!"
>noncombat chatter
"I fall down, I get back up. I fall down, I get back up. I fall down, I get back up. I fall down..."
"I can still remember what the sun looks like. Warmer than the flesh of the fallen."

I think it would be neat if they were also forced to kill each other by the same magic. In that case:
"Not again! Please! I don't want to!"
"This isn't what I want! I'm sorry!"
"Run! Before it's too late!"

It would make for really disturbing combat, especially if the player characters were good aligned.

Do you have a more specific theme for them? That might help a bit. Either way, have some generic bad guy shit:

>Idle
"Where'd I leave it...? Two rocks...? Or was it the puddle?" (This or similar can lead to hidden stashes)
"Hungry... need a smoke... need a woman... need a lotta things."
"When's the next guy comin'? My shift ended twenty minutes ago."

>Combat
"You! You're the one I'm looking for!"
"What's wrong? We're friendly guys!"
"Ah, you look new. I'm top dog here!"

As a general rule I'd say the trick is to weave a bit of useful information in there now and then along with the characterization. I remember Manhunt had some pretty good one-liners from the bad guys.

"You don't seem to fully appreciate the level of crazy I operate at."
"I have not slept or eaten in days, and I'm feeling AWESOME!"
"Just doing my job, just doing what I'm paid for."

>Just loafin' around:
"I live, I die, I live, I die, I live..." (do it while picking caps off of a mushroom or something, like an insane version of "he loves me, he loves me not."
"Happy funeral, Jerry! How many has it been, thirty?" (Preferably part of a dialogue.)
"Becoming a vegetarian is the worst part of this dungeon." (If everything slain comes back to life, no meat for you.)

>Actively tryin' to shank a cheeky fuck:
"The first one's the worst, I promise!"
"Come now, no need to be scared."
"Let's be friends, shall we?"

>After being actively shanked by a cheeky fuck:
"See ya... later.. pal."
"You haven't done shit."
"Watch your back, sunskin."

"Craaaayyyy-zee. Over the rain-bow I am craaaayyyy-zee. Truly gone fishing."

borderlands.wikia.com/wiki/Goliath

For some of the compleatly insane enemies you can resure quotes from the goliath enemy type in borderlands such as:
"Gonna... FLOSS WITH YOUR SPINE!"
"Try breathing through crushed lungs!"
"Get on your goddamn knees!"
"Fear your master, bitches!"
"You won't wanna be conscious for this next fight!"

Hell, use lines from Krieg and the generic psychos too. And don't forget about Super Mutants.

youtu.be/HuPOfWWdzcs
It maybe far from one liners, but I find this fun nonetheless.

Some of the guards in Thief have some pretty good dialogue, though they aren't quite crazy. The pagans from the same series are also pretty good and a bit more crazy, though they've kind of got a storybook vibe.

>Fences charred, blazie sheet!
>Blackened tar, manflesh meat!

Just Loafing
> Four walls... Ceiling... Four walls... Ceiling...
> Why did he hurt me? I didn't deserve that. I DIDN'T-... Mean... To...
> Daaaaaisy Daaaaaisy, give me your answer do! I'm haaaaalf cra- N-nO! I'm not Crazy!
> Dan was here, Now he's Gone, Now I'm here, Then I was Gone.

Combat:
> Tell me the way out!
> Give me my shit back! That's MINE!
> You smell Great! I want a Bite!
> I FEEL SO ALLLLIVE!

Death:
> You're... Not... So big.
> I'll be *cough* seeing you later.
> My name is Dan. Remember-
> I remember now! There's no way out-
> We'll finish... This later.
> I... I like you.

HEY THERE FRIENDS DOMT WORRY ILL GET YA OUTVE HERE IN A JIFFY

Just load up Dark Souls and read the bloodstain messages.

Idle:
>Oh, [player character name], where are thou?
>End this pain, please.
>Where I left my corpse this time?
>Damn, last checkpoint was so far away...
>Is this a real life? Or it's just fantasy?
>No escape from reality...
When spotting players:
>Mommy?!
>Dont stop me now!
>Open your eyes!
>Look up for sky and see!
>I'm just a poor boy, I need no sympathy!
When diying:
>Easy come, easy go,
>Little high, little low,
>Any way the wind blows doesn't really matter to me, to me.
>I have a such good time...
>I want to break free...

>If everything slain comes back to life, no meat for you
Actually when you come back in the dungeon, you regenerate to how you were, even if you were horribly disfigured, beheaded, burnt to crisp, ect. The only way to really kill someoe for good is disintegration or a very thorough cremation. This has lead to cannibalism.