Greentext stories

It's been far too long without a good read, Veeky Forums, so let's get some greentext stories going




No one else keen on story time?

I'm reading but don't have anything that isn't posted in every thread


Here's some fresh stuff from last week.

How long's it been since the last screencap thread? Two or three days tops? Let the field lie fallow for a bit.





And that's the batch, please resume your usual repost schedule.


This is just self indulgent crap. Link the threads and be done with it. You are as bad as the guy that posted all of Crab-user's crap the other day.


Alright I'll bite, what the fuck?


>greentext thread
>should not post greentext
No, fag, choke on dick to death pls.


No seriously what the fuck


Here's a real TLDR for you.

In the vein of this, does anyone have the one that was the warlock in a game with magical girls?


This goofy thing?

but why

>Playing Fallout homebrew
>Roll up sentient deathclaw that's extra stunty, focus heavily on stealth
>Slum it up underneath the Vault the party is calling home.
>Make a living scaring maintenance workers and stealing any food they leave behind.
>Eventually the party runs afoul of the Overseer, seeks refuge in the lower levels
>Party medic encounters me while taking a nap underneath a pile of rocks.
>Mixture of horror and curiosity is the first reaction. At least she didn't shoot me on first sight.
>Get in good with the party as a guide, hunting food for them, helping them avoid hazards, and brutally mauling any fauna that gets too close.
>It was at this point the DM noticed I had the Wild Wasteland trait
>Opened a whole new story line, involving star goddess and ancient demons, based off a native legend about the site of the Vault.
>I become a paladin, complete with holy smiting and lay on hands, which became stronger the higher my karma was.
>Quickly became the single nicest monster in the Wasteland. Still remained the whirling blender of stealthy death, but only after peace was tried
>Eventually we battled our way through the Vault, killing possessed guards, Lovecraftian horrors from beyond the veil, and a shoggoth pretending to be the Overseer.
>Final battle was ontop of the Vault's mountain, against avatars of the four horsemen.
>Beat the fuck out of all of them, although most of us nearly died in the process.
>Made a sweet suit of armor out of War.
>Thus ended the first arc, and an end to the super natural craziness. Mostly. We did about five more story arcs before the DM felt we had "won" at Fallout.

Yes thank you! I wish there'd been more from that user.

I know, it's not a real greentext, just something that was posted in an All Guard Party thread when someone asked for a summary of the story so far. I don't know why I saved it.

That sounds like deliciously silly fun.

It was. As the party freak, I enforced a very, very accepting policy for who we let into the Vault, and eventually the city we built up around it. Super mutants, ghouls, other sentient deathclaws, even some Enclave survivors were all let inside, so long as they played by the rules.

I always fluffed his lay on hands as a swift backhand, that left the person feeling like a cool, mint scented breeze washed over them.





So was that the same guy that did the Pirates one? Because that seemed pretty similar, in a good way though.

Not sure. Know it's Shoggy of AGP fame though.

This was quite recent, and is quite good.

Oh that fits

>Summer 2014
>In FTU because got fucked up in Basic Training
>See dudes in corner with pens paper and stop watches laughing and generally being happy
>walk over and find out they're playing a very barebones version of DnD
>using some algorithm on digital stopwatches for die rolls
>Never played before but it looks fun
>Get to join the next session, don't know shit about what I'm doing but eventually make a halfling rogue speaking like some Fuedal Era Japanese Shogun
>Still clueless about what I'm doing, stumble into a trap the DM had set up triggering an illusion and golems to attack us
>roll to resist the illusion
>roll 1 with a -2 modifier
>"Instead of being merely stunned by the illusion, you start trying to count the infinite amount of butterflies in your vision for 5 turns"

That's a pretty cool intro to tabletop to say the least. Mine involved a morbidly obese man explaining what a "fursona" was.

Good times.

Fuck off unwashed cunt

there could be so many more of these that just weren't cataloged.
Imagine what we're missing out on.

>Imagine what we're missing out on

Well, you can just sing me to sleep now, you bastard.

I was in that thread I Still don't get the point of that cap, or is that the point (being terrible)

Since when the fuck is that at all her character? Did the show change her entirely? This is horrifically disgusting.

I don't even know where she's from and I wondered what the hell was that.

and why did it give me a boner

get the fuck out of Veeky Forums and never come back you piece of shit.

There is an episode where it's apparant that she have a vore fetish
This motivated the other anons to gave here every other fetish in existence.

I was in this thread! It was a fucking glorious day of waiting on user to post more greentext.

the irony of this post is that I am now 5 minutes closer to death.

This happened not too long ago, but I'm just glad I was a part of it

I love the fact that that's still passed around. I'm in there, you know, and I'm proud of it. I'm the guy who asked if any drawfags wanted to do that.

I am actually kind of glad I'm up late to see this, thank you.

wtf is this crap

Well, dumping, I guess.


crap. our most sacred beliefs.



As a catholic, I find this mildly offensive. I can't help but feel whoever wrote did it for no other purpose than to provoke a response from us.


That's hilarious in a wtf way.

Would you go far to say that you were perchance [TRIGGERED]?

That's not "too long; didn't read", that's " too compressed; can't read"


yes, with utmost deliberance.


I don't know what your like on the inside, but on the outside your a pain in the ass.

Well, that's too bad, user! Some people might have opinions and beliefs that differ from ours! That's what makes our world so interesting to live in, don't you think?



Does anyone have the one with the drow exchanging letters between a surface drow and his traditional relatives?


And I'll pause for now.

What post jackson?

It's not a greentext but fuck you it's amazing.

haven't seen this one before
saved for future threads

You cannot just say that and not tell us the story

did we ever get the rest?

Of course you would be offended that one of your fellows was denied the opportunity to diddle another kid.

Not everything is about you and your stupid fucking cult, you arrogant little bitch baby. Maybe, just MAYBE, if you paid an ounce of attention to the actual content of the story, you'd see that it's a pretty obvious metaphor for the whole yin-yang thing. You know, the old-as-the-hills (and older than your cult) idea that there is some good in bad, and some bad in good.

Oh, wait, you're Catholic, so Taoism or any other belief is "EVIL".

The Force, then, like from Star Wars. Now get the fuck over yourself.


As an Aussie who comes from a bogan family....this hits way too close to home and I feel dirty

While I'd like to make up this amusing anecdote about That GM, it was really just a case of:
>Go to check out campus gaming group
>Nobody else is there but Manblob GM, who informs me that he freeform RPs on a furry forum and I'm welcome to join him if the rest of the group doesn't show up that evening.
>After about ten minutes of excruciatingly awkward explanation of the in and outs of this freeform's setting, I announce I have homework to do and leave
>I'm pretty sure he wasn't a student

I found the non-advertised gaming group a few months later, which was a much more agreeable experience (even if they were playing GURPS).


As an actual Christian, I invite you to ACTUALLY READ THE BIBLE where Jesus Himself says that He has half-siblings (lol "Mary remained a virgin"), that Mary sinned just like every other human being (lol "Mary was sinless and was assumed into heaven"), that you must call no man 'Father' (lol priests), that no man may absolve you of your sins (lol "confession"), to never engage in vain repetitions (lol "hail Mary"), and to not worship any other gods (lol praying to a human woman).

Cry harder, you filthy heretic.



recent and short, but still chuckle-worthy



shite crop, entertaining story

Haven't seen that one before. Pretty good.


fucking ATROCIOUS cap, but one of my favourites

and this'll do it for my dump. gotta get to an exam

glad to be of service

Short. Sweet. Silly.

Always label your notes, kids.

Quality story

Fucking taoists, always disregarding the importance of social order.

No, it was at Benning. I just got fucked up and had to join the rest of the brokedicks. Though fat camp was just downstairs.

As another Catholic, I'm going to have to call you out as a really dumb troll.
And, only Catholics get to call other people heretics, you fundamentalist who fails at understanding even very simple components of basic theology.