Could your party be trusted to raise a child, Veeky Forums?

Could your party be trusted to raise a child, Veeky Forums?

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>[wipes sweat externally]

Uncle Magnus shall teach him the ways of Dwarfdom.

Our games been going for so long that our characters have all got kids, so i think yes they could handle one more.

Define "raise"

There's always room for one more child soldier.

So far, so good.

The trick is getting her out of Southern Empire held territory before their patrols catch on to our trail.

And avoiding the dire beasts that populate the north, but so far they're just larger versions of the normal ones so we've been able to distract them with food.

Pfft, my party did raise a child. Hatched a hook horror from an egg and raised him to adulthood while fighting demons at the same time.


He would hire someone else to do the job.
So yeah, by proxy.

One of them was specifically built to raise children, but her programming is a little borked now so I'm going to say "no".

Is anybody feeding this poor child? Every clip I see of her gives the impression she's not eating well.

One party is comprised of murder hobos so I would rule them out completely. The other party I am in has a slightly decent shot at raising a kid.

No way, they'd lose the child half way through the session, and when reminded about it they'd claim that's how it was meant to be and how they can do nothing about it and then they'd fuck off to another city.

>Male elf wizard who dabbles in necromancy
Absolutely not. Doesn't help the guy used Wisdom as his dump stat.
>Female half-elf Cleric of Thor
Most likely no because she love smashing things and making them go boom (enemies and allies included).
>Female tabaxi rogue assassin
She is a contract killer who cares for no one but themselves, so chances are high on "no".
>Female half-elf blood hunter ghost slayer
This character actually has a daughter and it's so weird seeing them go from slaughtering vampire spawn, werewolves, witches and more to suddenly doting on and reading rhymes to her daughter. I'd say they're the most likely to raise them right but they are there to kill monsters so they have a high chance of dying.

One of the party members is like, 5. So let's hope so.

My party are children

Well, two of our party characters ended up pregnant not that long ago, so....

>Semi-Shota Musketeer, face and brains of the party, but nobody cares, giant faggot just like me
>Werewolf - Ranger, le "loner" type, when he isn't constantly pissed he is extremly ennoyed, hates children
>Firnelven Witch, absolutely nihilistic, hating all gods, absolute cleptomaniac, but apart from that, actually ok
>Dwarfen Smith, Tourette Syndrome, Greedy, Absolutely Barbaric, but hey, he is the tank and does this pretty well
I think not, that they would be the best role models...

No clue who she is, but if the memes are anything to go by, she seems to be a glutton with inhuman metabolism.

>Racist Roman Legionnaire expanding his influence in the war through gratuitous machismo and overconfidence.
>Man-eating crocodile person who's mostly in it for expanding his hand collection.
>Slavic ranger who's straight out of medieval S.T.A.L.K.E.R., just replace "nuclear power plant" and "radiation" with "ancient castle" and "fey bullshit".
>A half-dozen expendable grunts who regularly get replaced after occupational hazards get the better of them.
I imagine not.

Everyday, she eats handmade healthy meals made by her big sister dragon and occasional sweet treats from her adoptive mom who doesn't know how to cook.

Don't worry for the dragon loli she will grow up nice and healthy.


Define trust for me here user. If a child were left in the care of my team of Shadowrunners they would survive, be quite comfortable most of the time and even get a 'good' education. In that regard yes, I'd trust them to raise the child.

If you want the child to grow up to be something other than a career criminal and aspire to something other than Shadowrunner, then no.

Every single male character I have made has at least one child he raised, usually with the mother.

The cute girl from Op's picture is from a Maid Dragon anime.
>laterally a female computer programmer in a drunken stupor saves a dragons life
>In return the dragon becomes the woman's maid
>later all of the dragon's dragon friend stop by and learn chilling in our nonmagic human world is pretty cool.

The little girl is actually one of the dragons.
There is also a nordic dragon that roommates with a otaku and becomes N.E.E.T. and quetzalcoatl who uses her massive "assets" to torture a shota wizard side character.

laterally=literally stupid autocorrect


Here is quetzalcoatl

>Sort of reformed criminal
>Cannibal in rehab

...sure, why not?

she charges using electricity, she just eats because she wants to.

Anyone got the gifs of Kanna eating a switch cartridge?

Oh to be that wizard.

I promise not to rename them like a tumblr filename just to troll the easily triggered person who is right this second angrily typing >tumblr


Spoilered for excessive violence

Some of us once tried to clean out an orphanage, so we could probably do it again.

Probably not. We're basically a visual representation of the DSM, and fate (and our own actions) have a bad tendency to screw us and those we love over. Even if we didn't end up emparting one or several of our various "quirks" on them, theyd probably end up in enough dangerous situations that any reasonable moral guardian would take them away in a heartbeat, and we'd entirely agree.

Of course, that didnt stop us from adopting several children over the course of the story. Most of them have ended up at least a little screwed up, but its (mostly) not our fault. Especially since one of them was a PC's rape baby, but not in the way you would think.

she eats bugs constantly too

> Teenage Superhero Campaign
I mean, maybe? It'd be kids raising kids but there's no shortage of teen mothers out there. I imagine the rich girl in the wheelchair would take the de facto mother role, because she's dying to show something some affection, the brainiac mind-controlling dude would be the stern but fair stand-in father, the smoking speedster bad boy would be the cool uncle who's nothing but a bad influence but fiercely protective, and the dragon-totem hyperlesbian... probably closer to a big sister than an actual carer.

> D&D 4e Campaign
The party elf isn't allowed within 50 feet of children, that should tell you enough. He and the fighter passed out from hunger trying to cook a stone once because they didn't want to 'waste' their rations. They barely qualify as looking after themselves. The wizard would turn the child into a toad to add to his growing toad army. The Dwarf Cleric might actually make a decent carer, but not so long as he's tied up babysitting the rest of the party.

You fail to realize how durable that girl is. She is a young dragon, from a anime that treats dragon power levels like shadowrun.

Sure. In most games I've been in that go on long enough the PCs end up having kids. Where do you expect to get the next generation of characters from otherwise? Just hire some bum off the street? You want to be able to keep the property and influence your character has built up when it comes time to retire him, and you want to do it in a way that makes sense narratively.

A man's first responsibility is to his daughteru.

Upgrade her to a daughterfu

I'd fucking hope so, considering that they're married and planning to settle down once current matters are dealt with.

Define trust, raising, and child.

I know who Kanna is, the only reason the children we adopted can survive all the bullshit we see is because they have a powerlevel similar to hers. We are very aware that the PCs are far from the most power things in the universe, and we are their pawns.

Fug, hit send too early. I don't trust myself to raise a child, and I am a dad, and I have had great parents growing up. As a father, I don't trust noone to raise a child.

Truly Disturbing

I don't recall her really eating particularly much. She just has a weird tendency to swallow bugs and other small animals. She probably has an inhuman metabolism on the account of being a dragon, though (and her true form, while small for a dragon is still several times larger than a human).

Gluttonous lolis are the best kind, though.

Like I said, the only exposure to said animu is through the memes, and plenty of them have her eating things.

She's not really a child either, she's pretending because her own childhood was shit and wants a do-over and can in the nonmagic humanworld.

>Human wizard girl freshly expelled from college, somehow wound up with her own castle
Probably not, and god help the child if she can't find it. She once lost herself on a cliff ledge with a large rock between her and the rest of the party. Though, she also has an old man, his teenager niece, and a vampire lord bro living there with her already, so, who's to really say?
>Elf druid girl in charge of her 'clan'
Ehhhhh, could go either way. Probably would obsess over it the entire time and make it the focal point of the game, since she's the DM's gf.
>Half-ogre monk
No one allow this man near any child, he might confuse it for food. Character isn't even exceptionally low-INT, player RPs him as dumber than he really is.
>Tiefling paladin
He'd probably do the best job out of all of us, raising her in the church and shit, amusingly enough.

All of us together? We could probably manage - we kept aforementioned teenage niece safe just fine, for the most part.


>they're both your daughters

No, she's a child, she's just a long lived child because Dragons lol

No she's a child by the standard of her species

>elf assassin that was numbed to emotions thanks to years of torture by her handlers
Surprisingly, maybe, if it was supposed to be her job. We once hired her to catsit and she did it well.
>High end socialite adept
Hell no, as drugged up as she is the kid would never make it past the first few months
>karate cowboy
He's an idiot. but the team's moralfag and has dealt with kids before becoming a Runner, so sure
>loli street sam
She'd probably shake it at one point to see if it was damaged and kill it
>KE agent with an appreciation for running
Probably the wisest choice out of the whole team, has a lot of resources to help raise a kid

>Pyromancer mage who's slowly losing it after his father was recently assassinated
Lord no
>Half-orc Diviner/hunter who usuallyeans well but lets greed get in the way sometimes
Eh maybe
>Paladin/scorcerer of Kord
he's an uppity dick at times but means well, a tab oblivious at times.
Eh I could see him taking the job and raising a kid, abet not really giving too much emotional support though
>Paladin of freedom/Sun
while being a bit slow and not being able to read very well(7 int) he's probably the only other genuinely good person in the party aside from the other paladin and would jump at the chance to help an innocent and put them on the path to good and not really complain, and I could also see the party just dumping a kid on him anyway if it occurred.

Isn't she like fuckton old but like 7 in dragon years? I thought she was described as a child mentally.

>2000-year-old Warforged Warblade?
Doesn't know humans need to eat, sleep, or breathe, so no.
>Hitman for the Halfling Mafia?
Probably, but his vocation is a bit too dangerous for the kid.
>Traveling doctor of Fharlanghn?
>Aussie Muscle Wizard with testosterone posioning?
>Very very Russian Bard?
He's more the "cool uncle" than someone you would trust with a kid.
>Elderly amputee Warmage?
Had a kid of his own, so probably.
Probably not, but it won't stop them from trying.

She's not actually a child.

What did she want to do?

That one is from tumblr, though, isn't it?

>Elf party
Maybe the paladin could.
>Three stooges party
Maybe the monk could.
>Curse of Strahd party
Maybe the cleric could.

Play Twister, of course.

The Party so far is a Mermaid Sorceress and three young Sea Dragons that the Mermaid is practically an adoptive mother to.

If said child can survive underwater, then sure. What's one more child to raise for Magic Mermaid Mum.

If not, then they at least know of a quiet fishing village who could probably take her in.

>A doctor, two mercenaries, and a necrotic zombie.
I mean, probably. Kids probably gonna end up being just as murder hobo as all of us though
By her standards "eating well" means "eating as much as a soccer team on the verge of starvation".

my party would place the child in a convenient place to chain chainlightning from a save distance.

yes they did this to me one time, never play a gnome healer

How can Kanna eating things be so cute?

She wanted to $%#! with her.

FUCK no.

>I don't even know this kid

Friendly reminder that 50% of party members tasked to raise a child would be assumed to be child molesters by the general populace.

These kind of anime really don't help things.

there is no "with"

What generic fantasy adventuring setting has Japanese japaniméción influencing the general populace?

Define "right"

Because any way, the answer is no.

I accidentally burned a young girl alive by setting the cornfield she was hiding in on fire with alchemist's fire.

So, no.

Geez, user, relax she actually does know that kid.
She was explicitly asked by the kid's father to look after the kid.
She is also deputized police officer, complete with badge and everything.

In the manga it was mentioned that when a dragon uses magic to transform in a human form, they don't get to choose their appearance. Rather, their human appearance is effectively what that dragon would look like if it was a human. So Kanna being a child in her human form would indicate that she's a child by dragon standards.

I don't trust them to rp their way out of a wet paper bag let alone this.

Cool speculation but:

>current 4e party:
>a half-elf bard that tries to bed almost every woman he meets, and at one point accidentally flirted with his mom, and currently running a political campaign to become king against his father
>an elf monk who refuses to keep any money on her, and throws around any she gets haphazardly
>a fucking psycho demon in a small girl's body
>a rabbit girl cleric who is reluctantly orchestrating church-sanctioned ritual sacrifice to revive her goddess
>a rabbit girl sword mage from a small tribe who is also running a campaign against the bard and his father to become queen
>a possibly gay summoner angel that had his wings torn off by harpies, currently trying to raise a teenage dragon
>an amnesiac human warlord who's actually a 300 year old robot and former ruler of a technocratic kingdom

Out of all of these, I'd probably only trust the either the gay angel summoner or the rabbit girl sword mage to be a competent parent of a small child.

>implying children don't want to fuck things

The last party I played in had a Von Carstein as the party leader. So any kid they would have would likely either be drained and turned into an undead servant or a vampire within ten years.

The party in my normal games has effectively Gilgamesh, The daughter of Gilgamesh suffering from madness, A lawful knight plotting treason, And the knights sister who is hedonistic to the point of effective slaanesh worship. All in all while a kid raised by them would live it would also likely be fairly messed up in the head.

Well they are all lawful neutral. The Space Robot Judge might have some trouble. Possibly the heart warming kind.

>goblin hobo with a cobbled-together 'blast-staff'
>shapeshifting cat burglar/hedge wizard
>'Shellshocked' birdman who only vaguely speaks any languages outside of simple mimicry
>womanizing alcoholic detective with a death wish
>we're all traveling under assumed names half the time
>we're about to make enemies of the largest crime ring on the continent
Hell no, we could not.

They could be trusted to dump it at the nearest reputable orphanage.

Pffffffft no
>most child-friendly character is an older-than-she-looks fey

Don't fey steal children anyways? Why doesn't she have one in the first place?

Wasn't the series yuribait?

On a scale of zero to Sakura Trick it's a moderate Mouretsu Pirates or Teppu: one or two lesbians are involved but the meat of the show is elsewhere

Raise? Most certainly. Make them a functional adult? Might have a couple issues there.

Cease this slander, girls are beating the shit out of each other in strictly platonic way.

Sure, can't be that hard.

My party's had to raise twelve children. It went well for all of them, even those who were litteraly evil incarnate. I guess they are okay at parenting.

>MC is a closeted S&M lesbian who hasn't clued in yet even while creaming herself over the idea of getting pounded
>Karate girl is a bitter ex who bottles up her feelings and pretends she's just mad MC abandoned The True Path Of Martial Arts
>Karate girl's underling is confirmed homogay, boldly proclaiming her feelings in public
>Eyebrows Monkey is asexual but will marry MC anyway because she lacks all empathy and can only express herself through punches
>Butch pro-MMA chick hitting on other competitors ringside

You know what, I take it back. Teppu is way gayer than meidoragons and Mouretsu Pirates.

Come on, man, this is your chance to try again and make up for past sins.