How to kill an unkillable Vampire

Turn Undead + Sunlight.

>but the only important bit about that is that her spirit is still hanging around somewhere. Basically, she can't have been trapped or anything, she needs to have been destroyed
Can you elaborate on this?

Why can't she just be sealed away a la any other ancient evil.
Use the water in the bathhouse to trap her, however long later someone fucks with it and she gets out

Well, from a logical perspective, sure, she could have been trapped, it's just that for the sake of where the campaign is and where I'm going with it, I just don't want that to have been the case.

See #6 of this Cracked.com article.

cracked.com/article_19736_6-psychotic-punishments-doled-out-by-famous-superheroes.html

This.

I already had her second in command delt with that particular way, I want her's to be a bit different from staking.
Darkness physiology means she can essentially turn herself into shadows to avoid this.
Could you elaborate?
Now, I could work with these. Maybe he blesses the water in the baths and the dragon boils them so the room fills with what's essentially holy steam. At this point, that could severely impede her various tricks like turning into gas or into shadows etc.
As I said before, want to avoid stakes.
Way too anticlimactic.
That's nuts. Crazy awesome, but nuts. Still, not what I'm going for with this, as I want her to have her physical form at the very least to be destroyed. Then her spirit needs to be prevented from reaching her coffin, because otherwise she could reform there (after an amount of time her spirit would dissipate, however, there's some plot stuff going on which means it can be coalesced via an item later on).

a few jugs of unending water to create 4 streams surrounding her.

She can't cross it. She's stuck. That's when the drip drip drip of holy water begins........

Okay, so maybe the holy steam comes first, then, for dramatic effect, it's revealed that during the fight he's somehow managed to create a pathway for water to run through. He then uses some kind of artefact from his days fighting merfolk to create running water and trap her in a closed off space full of holy steam.

Yes... I like this, I can work with this... So, her regeneration's down, she can't turn into gas or shadows, where to go from there?

I would also like to take this moment to point out that she is currently at the height of her power, drunk off of the blood from the equivelant population of industrial era london.

>during the fight he's somehow managed to create a pathway for water to run through
Okay, I've decided that this bathhouse is for the rich, and high up somewhere. There's a bath a little higher than the others. The artefact is basically a portal to the ocean. He sets it up to pour into the higher bath, and has smashed things so that it runs into the baths on either side of this bath and forwards a little, and eventually running out of a hole smashed into the side of the bathhouse by the dragon. Basically creating a little diamond shaped area of running water.

>she will reform in her coffin

Evocation is basically "BURN IN HOLY FIRE" incarnate.

Space her

>Running Water - Cannot Cross
>roman bathhouse

Have the basins connected to each other, with valves they can turn up for makeshift running water. Gives the players something to maneuver with.

>Powerful Holy Fire/Water - Prevents healing
The bathhoue also has a little chapel of some water god/goddess of prostitution. Alternatively, there are waters with healing properties. Like the Kaiserthermen in Aachen. Make them holy to some faith.

Ancient vampires are notoriously melancholy; convince her to kill herself or allow herself to be killed.

Okay, so there's plenty of bathhouse stuff that could lead to her being in a compromising position, but what about actually finishing her off? I don't want to go with something predictable like a stake, sunlight or by excessive amounts of holy light or anything, what are some interesting ways she could be put down?

Beheading, followed by dismemberment and throwing her body parts into the furnaces that heat the baths.

Accurate for almost all the ancient vampires in the setting except for this one to be honest. She started this whole excursion as a vengeance quest. She's already killed all the people who wronged her a thousand years ago by now. Unfortunately, vampirism comes from a kind of blood god in this world, but as the first, she sort of fused with some of the deity itself. She can't stop her quest for blood because that thirsting passion to slaughter everybody is part of her entire existence at this point.
We could use the dragon for that bit.

>unkillable
So unkill her. Problem solved. We are talking about undead here, right? Don't bother with trying to kill her, just unkill her.

Then you've got a normal mortal human, easy enough to kill those.

Melting into glass worked on something that could turn into mist, so I assume it would work here too.

>How to kill an unkillable Vampire
Hey
Hey
OP
Hey
do you know
Fag listen up
Hey do you know
What the word
Okay
Fag, OP, etc.
Do you know what the word "unkillable" means?
Do you
OP hey
Do you know what the definition is?

It's almost as if the OP is using exaggerated terms in hopes people will give some examples of extreme methods of doing away with particularly persistent vampires.

Please stop being a fag at your earliest convenience.

You don't have to kill her, just put her in a situation where she can't escape. Like trap her in a block of cement or throw her into the ocean or something.

Oh also launch her into space. That's good too.

Banish her to another dimension. Like the Plane of Positive Energy, or the Elemental Plane of Fire.

Make it WANT to die.

Have him drop a hundred pound block of Rubidium into the water right onto her head.
Another thing you could do is to stop making your villains so OP.

>Turn into gas

Get a bunch of bottles. When she turns into gas, catch her in as many bottles as possible.

I'm taking a wild guess here, but by any chance was Patient Zero of vampirism of an entirely unknown species and did they arrive by impacting the planet like a meteorite, aside from being strapped to an engine and a note translating as "your problem now aliens"?

Have a player/character trap him/herself in between dimensions with the vampire

It's almost as if people didn't read the bit about OP not wanting her to wind up just being trapped...

...No, I can say that this is not the case. Vampirism came from the melding of an immortality cults practices and the god of the devils/blood being held prisoner within an item carried by 'patient zero'.

I hadn't thought about that, and I don't think I've seen vampires dealt with like this very often. It won't work on her unfortunately (just due to her nature and how she became a vampire), but I'll have it that he tried to deal with her in that way first, that having been his plan A.
Oh? What's this in reference to?
See I established in the OP post that for story reasons I don't want her to have been trapped in any way.
As much as I'm entertained by this, I don't think that's a feasible amount of Rubidium to have a dude own.

itt : op is a faggot

Babtized in holy water while all his limbs are cut off. Then the dragon torches him till he's ash. Keep the ash in several places in flasks of holy water so he can never regen.

Call Jeebus to smack a bitch.

OP, she is in a bathhouse right?
And he is a holy warrior?
And she is not just a vampire, but THE Vampire, a godlike incarnation of blood and death, literally mixed with a god?
....
This is going to sound bad, but I think he should give her the most persistent STD known in existence.
Life.
She's high on murdering and drinking up basically a city or whatever, chilling in a bathhouse, the strongest SHE HAS EVER BEEN, pretty much unkillable, no need to fear anything at this point... and the Number One Holy Mcdoushnoggins shows up?
He seduces her while she is literally High on Life, being blessed by the gods favor himself, his Seed and Love or whatever weakens the shit out of her, draining the evil gods abilities away. Cue dragonbro with crossing the steams of holy water and a quick chop to the head while pillowtalk is happening.
For extra points, have the paladin preserve the headless body until the pregnancy comes to term for extra gruesome legend status,
and that bloodline persists upon the earth,
as she waits to claim the body of one of her descendants
bear with me it is 3am here

If you can't kill it, you just need to make it want to die.
>Hey, do you have a minute to talk about the new Ghostbusters?

A classic.

Fused with a blood god, huh? Then, it's simple.

Remove bloodgod.

If the bathhouse has a fountain and tiered pools, break the walls between some of the pools so that they form running water, trapping her while you get theologists, cultists and priests to separate or starve the blood god away from her, and then either kill the vampire through conventional vampire-killing means or get creatively medieval.

Jack off before posting on Veeky Forums

I actually really like this. I cant really post much at the moment, but what are some ways you could take the blood god out?

Take out her blood. If she has any.

Okay, she currently has the blood of half a million people, but uses it to attack by solidifying it into spears and stuff, as well as fueling her more powerful abilities.

Punch her til she dies.

If she has the blood of half a million people in her, I imagine she's got a ton of iron in her system. You could get a mage to magnetize her to an iron table. Underneath the table, there is a pyre of holy flames, which will heat the table until it is red hot. A potential deathbed?

Or better yet, surround her in a room of iron, Then, get a mage to magnetize the metal in her body towards the walls, ceilings, and floors.

copius amounts of blood will slam into the interior of the room as the vampire is torn into pale ribbons.

>I don't want her to have been trapped in any way.

Is there any particular reason she absolutely has to be killed instead of simply trapped?

do the holy water steam trick, beat her ass, then open a portal to the sun and shove her through

What happens if she falls into water

Ordinarily, iron is paramagnetic. However, the blood in hemoglobin is in a diamagnetic state, meaning this won't work.

Cure her of vampirism. Then kill her

every paladin ever

How to deal with a vampire.
Step 1: stake the vampire (stake should be covered in holy water/fire for maximum effectiveness) note that the stake must go through the heart.
Step 2: cut off head with holy sword or something. The exact method doesn't matter just make sure it comes clean off.
Step 3: burn the body entirely with holy fire.
Vampire is dead 100% of the time ... at least until they come back through some obscure ritual.

>game is actually a novel
>my $x are different
>villian is a sue
>power list reads like Sonic fanfic
Something tells me SOP for killing any vampire ever is going to be ineffective.

it's diamagnetic(hemoglobin, at least) when the blood is warm and oxygenated. Our vampire is undead and does not need to breath.

The mage has to up his ante creating a magnetic field for the table, or somehow alter the properties of the vampire's blood.

Does she physically have three million litres of blood in her? Is she a giant bloated leech thing? Does she keep the blood in some blood dimension?

Multiple light sources from all sides so that she can't cast a shadow. And trying to transform into shadow should kill her in this case.

Next goes the combat part. Considering her abilities probably with causalities from heroes side but that depends on their abilities.

After she is beaten her corpse should be wrapped in sanctified cloth and dropped into sanctified oven. Burn the body and catch the smoke. Wait until smoke falls down and on the walls of the oven. Get all the ash and drown it in sanctified acid. The resulting liquid should be poured in silver sphere and hermetically sealed. Add second layer of gold sphere over silver. Then lead, steel and best and most enduring bronze you have. Give the container to sea captain and order it to be drown in the deepest part of the ocean you know.

Create a monastic order that each day prays for her to suffer the most horrible tortures in Hell.

First things first - if she has blood of half a million people in her she looks like a giant bloated spheroid mosquito that is at least the size of castle tower. And she moves mostly by rolling around.

wood chipper

>Running Water - Cannot Cross
>Powerful Holy Fire/Water - Prevents healing

The holy warrior managed to trap her in an underground cave complex by cunningly redirecting a nearby river. Next, the dragon used its fire breath to met rocks into lava. The lava was was blessed by a true believer priest and dumped on her.
She died incinerated by HOLY LAVA.

OP should tell us about the nature of his vampire's blood retention. I like to think that it's all compressed inside of her like a white dwarf star.

Some bullshit where the hero's blood is full of holy bullshit, she drinks it and dies. That, or the hero drinks supernatural poison before their fight in case he loses.

Holy lava could be fantastic.

>get another vampire
>capture the target
>make one eath the other
>remove the other one if needed

Or

>Get some swag-ass weapon
>kill through immortality

Or

Kars her into space

Or

Call a god and ask him to blow her up for good

Or

Don't write an immortal character, who is needed to die for the plot

Just say the hero held her head underwater while she thrashed about for hours, until she finally succumbed. In the future, don't be so specific about this type of shit.

1. Trap her with that runnin' water bollocks that people above me have been writing about.
2. The sword of the paladin is used to impale her heart.
3. Due to the fact that the sword is connected somehow to the paladin's god which has a hateboner for undead, the god himself sends a fuckton of holy fire through the sword and into the op-vampire.
4. The mary sue dies like a certain von carstein.
5. ???
6. Profit

This is an option. Outside of that, though...

Assuming a link-based fusion, where the bulk of the blood god is elsewhere, and it's just the part that's in her maintaining a link supplying the powers, shift to an astral/deific/insert-god-related-adjective-here plane and have your sword guy apply sword to link until the link is terminated.
If it's physical fusion, with most of the god vested in her, some form of meta-physical surgery, perhaps?
And of course, as a last resort if the god decides she can cross some running water (or forces her to) if the gods work on Pratchettian theology, simply starving the blood god of faith should work to either diminish or outright eliminate said blood god's influence.
Which can be achieved either through mass hypnosis, fire-and-brimstone not!Jehovah's Witnesses or holy war.

Of course if you want to go full saga, a trip into the culmination of her being to literally beat the blood god to a bloody pulp (heh) could suffice, you'd probably need at least a mystic, shaman or some manner of dimensional/warp mage, and a theologist/ex-worshipper of blood god to help with the actual beat down.

Dragon magic maybe?

Probably. If it works that way, anyways.

>Okay, so I'm writing a novel/running a game/working out backstory for my world.

>Could you elegan/tg/entlemen help me devise a way

Have you ever considered not writing atrocious, absurdly overpowered, uninteresting characters?
Or preferably, have you ever considered just not writing.

This. OPs responses prove this is an exercise in futility

At risk of replying to bait, i'll have this to say:

>The original vampire was defeated at some point by a holy warrior
>The original vampire

It's the origin story for the setting's modern vampires, i think not!Caine is allowed to be fuckin' OP game breaker tier.

_________ ____ _____no__ _____ _____ _______

jojo part 2

>a trip into the culmination of her being to literally beat the blood god to a bloody pulp (heh) could suffice
OP here, could go with this as a way for the link to be terminated. Probably using dragon magic.

That being said, I like a lot of the ideas that have come out of this thread whilst I was at work.
These are really creative, and I may utilise the ideas in some way.
It doesn't work with the events I have set up for the party to encounter near the end of this campaign. Also, I dislike that almost every time something of this power level shows up, most of the time that's the answer the protagonists have for it. I think it's more interesting if we can find another way for her to be destroyed. She certainly could be trapped, I'd just rather it be done differently.
I love the thought that's gone into this, but the main thing I like is the light sources preventing a shadow. I may well use that.
I may well use the holy lava, it's already established in the setting that some dragons have breath hot enough to turn rock into lava, so it is easily doable.
There's three different ways. She has a necklace that houses a gemstone that originally contained the blood god (and in fact, still houses most of it). Though seperating her and it doesn't do much, she does store the greatest portion of her blood within the demiplane inside the gem. She also pulls the compression trick, whilst having her own pocket dimension that she slowly fills with blood she can't store within herself. She also draws upon all of this blood for a lot of her powers.
I already have that as a thing. It doesn't kill her because she figures it out the moment the first few drops leave his body, but it fucks her up for a while.
I was, and still am, tempted by god sword shenanigans.

Go home kars.

Oh wait, you can't.

So, the logical solution is all of the above.

>light all the lanterns to prevent escape via shadows
>break pools to make running water, prevent escape as non-shadow.
>magnetize blood to keep her steady for the dragon magic portal to connect
>get into her culmination of being
>apply godsword to bloodgod
>get outta her culmination
>get dragon to melt rocks into lava
>sanctify lava until it stays lava under it's own power
>insert into culmination portal
>cash in your job well done, acquire blessingbux.

I'm sure these here fellows will be glad to help you out, OP.

You could also make the paladin's sword be a reward for some quest (maybe given by the god that BBQ'd the villain sue) involving vampire killing.

>It doesn't work with the events I have set up for the party to encounter near the end of this campaign.

This is not a good mind set to have for DMing.

You should never build plans based on assuming that the PCs are going to do something you want them to, because they'll usually do something you didn't count on.

Three words: illusion of choice. My players have almost always gone in the direction I planned for from the start, and I have never ever received a single complaint of railroading, even when I've asked if there's any issues with the game. It helps that I have a really good group of players who tend to build characters they really get invested in, and apparently my strongest point as a DM is knowing the PCs well. Plus, the party are already on the quest that leads to this in the end, and have been since session one. This whole thing is what the party was put together to do.

They just don't know it leads here yet.

Hmmm, this is doable I think. Light can be done with paladin holiness stuff, pools can be done easily. Magnetising may be done by the dragon (dragons in the setting munch on certain minerals to use their fire breath, then supplement it with magic, and dragons wind up knowing a hell of a lot about geology, and it would probably wind up being the dragon that thinks of the magnetism idea).
Just need to think of how to describe the whole culmination of being bloodgod thing. I know that her gemstone necklace with her tie to the rest of its being will be torn away and flung outside of the baths. Could have it that his sword becomes blessed by his god during the fight with the essence of the blood god.

> Paladin uses holy power to create holy light from the walls and pillars of the bathhouse they are fighting in. This makes the vampire's shadow forms impossible to use, and prevents escape via shadows
> The pools in the bathhouse are tiered at different levels. Dragon enters the bathhouse by breaking the walls at a lower level tier. He uses an artefact from his long was with the merfolk to open a portal to the ocean at the highest tier, after smashing up some of the flooring to create pathways to lower tier pools to make running water, prevent escape as non-shadow. Can't cross running water.
> The dragon uses its magic to magnetize the iron in vamp's blood to keep her still
> The dragon uses its magic to allow paladin to travel to vamp's personal demi-plane, where he has to fight the essence of the blood god within her.
> He fights, and truly gains the blessing of his god.
> Gets holy godsword gift
> Apply godsword to bloodgod
> Paladin uses both hands to stab vamp's heart with the godsword. Vamp does not die, but is rooted there, but only whilst paladin keeps her stabbed.
> He gets dragon to melt rocks into lava whilst he is there
> He uses his power to sanctify lava until it stays lava under it's own power
> He then gets dragon to drown the both of them in holy lava
> Paladin dies
> Vamp dies

Thoughts?

Launch her into space.

Inherently silly.
Does the OP have to kill off/retire the paladin?

Pretty good. Nice, concise, doable by a decently high-level party and worthy of song. Bonus points if...

Eins: the demiplane gateway is still open, so some lava gets in there, too. Could make for an interesting plot point, if her bloodgod-bits end up fighting with holy lava....things stuck in her demi-plane, playing merry hell with her powers until she deals with that problem.

Twei: The paladin dies standing up, as if standing guard before the vamp's remains. So that if the player's plot kicks off with our vampire getting unearthed and somehow resurrected, while the researchers either fail to notice or are prevented from unearthing the (now full-on saint of vampire hunters) paladin's remains to easily solve the problem.

If not in this fight, then later. He's shown up in the previous campaign as an intelligent item in the form of the Paladin's tower shield.

Silly humans want vampires which surprises them given they behave the same as supernatural entities.

stakes made out of fresh wood are sometimes required to kill or disable vampires effectively. Fresh wood doesn't burn as easily as old dried out wood.

Is this 3.X D&D, because if so, 5th level HUNTER OF THE DEAD.