You are that guy

use the dead guardsman as a weapon

[panicked autistic screeching]

>wounded mortal guardsman makes a last stand with a knife against a traitor marine in the hopes he may buy time for his world
>traitor marines scared shitless at the thought of leaving the eye of terror without muh patron god

who really has Know No Fear?

Bravely run away

Only one?

"RIP AND TEAR!"
doomguy.jpg

If i kill myself does my soul get possesed?

>Wrong room, sorry. Have a nice day. Is that guy ok? Do I need to call somebody?

I dive toward the tail in the back. Hoping it will miss me and strike the monster behind me.

>You are not the most ugly thing I kill today"

>thank the emperor i have fate points left

You may have forsaken the Emperor traitor, but I will not.

>I hope I can get this knife into my neck before he takes me back to his mutant rape dungeon

>Fuugg :DDDDD

How long's left on that damn melta bombs fuse?

Lmao

This is my duty. This is what I signed up for. Long live the imperium. Long live the emperor. May the golden throne stand for a million years, and a million more after that, for as long as it stands, I will fear no man, nor demon, nor even a god. As long as the throne stands, so shall I. This is what we signed up for.

This is why you always reserve a grenade/bomb

>looking behind the chaos marine
>You're late, Commissar.
> Chaos marine look behind him
>Yell SNEAK ATTACK!!! and try to stab the motherfucker.

gg ez no re :^D

*rolls under u*
*unsheaths chainblade*

nothin personel kid

Fuck.

Whatever I'm thinking, it's in The Wonder Years voice

...

Last words the Guardsman hears is the Chaos Marine saying "Benis XD"

>YOU ARE HUGE!
>THAT MEANS YOU HAVE HUGE GUTS!
>...RIP AND TEAR YOUR GUTS!
>RIP AND TEAR!

> Well he just stepped on the pressure trigger. It was a good plan. Shame the escape route is blocked.

I teleport behind him

>Ok. I get one hit, that much is clear. One. And no single strike will kill this dude. Maybe not even phase him. So I gotta make it count. Even if it's not there, even if it doesn't get through all the armor, even if it makes my death all the more painful and slow-

>I'm gonna saw his goddamn mutant dick off.

At least he's not Slaaneshi.

> Oh sweet emperor, please be a Khonate and not a Slaaneshi.

>they only sent one?

>I wish I could've one of the mooks that were killed off by Vader in Rogue One, like Jerry. This is just insulting. The union really has gone to shit.

...

>Ain't no Emperor's Child

Considering that everything except protected Eldar and possibly Tau souls get devoured by chaos?

Good luck.

>rolls
>not tactical somersaults behind

2/10

>There's a good chance this guy will fuck his rolls

Way to fall to Khorne, idiot.

The Emperor Protects.

I roll to stick benis in anus XDDDDDD

>DOOM guy
>Falling to Khorne
Nah, he must kill the daemons

"Heh. Mum always said this would happen."

"P-Praise the dark gods! I have accomplished all that you asked, my Lord!"

yeah Doomguy is waaaay too goddamn angry for Khorne

youtube.com/watch?v=q657rEkgfKs

Doom style game where you're a lone Guardsman who's ship has been boarded by the forces of chaos when? I want to rip and tear some Chaos Marines no matter how impossible it would be realistically.

>Hastur, Hastur, Hastur.

*unsheathes chainknife*
Heh, this will be easy
*teleports behind the chaos marine*
Nuthin personnel, heretic
*slices him into a million pieces*

"I must not fear.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.

Do what any other red-blooded guardsman would do.
Charge while screaming "FOR THE EMPEROR"

>FOR THE EMPEROR!!!

>doomguy ever falling

Chaos would shit a collective brick if Doomguy ever entered the Warp.

>YOU'RE HUGE
>THAT MEANS YOU HAVE HUGE FEELINGS
>RIP AND TEAR YOUR EMOTIONS!

>Okay, all I have to do is hope he fails his To Hit roll of a 3+ or his To Wound roll of a 3+.

>prays he rapes my ass with his huge space marine cock before he brutally murders me.

>"maaan a heroic death and no one is even around to witness it."

If Doomguy makes it into the Warp, the universe is going to end, because he will murder the Warp and the resulting screams will wipe out existence in the desperation to escape his wrath.

The Praetorian Armor protects him from demonic taint and steals power from the Warp every time he kills a demon (therefore making the death permanent). In addition, the demonic taint his armor absorbs powers him up. In theory, if he kills enough demons and absorbs enough power, he could probably build up enough momentum to kill the Chaos Gods.

For Emperor and Imperium!
The Emperor Protects!

*Praetor Suit

So every Chaos God is just gonna be sitting in their dark throne, clicking their fingers, hearing weird popping noises outside as trillions of daemons fall to the exponential ripping and tearing, before he just bursts in like a living jet of righteous anger to 1-2 their face into porridge?

FUCK YOU AND FUCK YOUR USELESS EMPEROR. FUCK CHAOS. FUCK EVERY LAST ONE OF YOU COCKSUCKING ARROGANT TWITS. CAN'T EVEN BERSERK APART CHAOS RIGHT.

"Hello gorgeous, come here often?"

Picturing that happening just obliterated my sides

"What the fuck is Slaanesh Patrol?"

>So every Chaos God is just gonna be sitting in their dark throne, clicking their fingers, hearing weird popping noises outside as trillions of daemons fall to the exponential ripping and tearing, before he just bursts in like a living jet of righteous anger to 1-2 their face into porridge?
In a perfect world, yes.

Good luck fitting through that door!

Khorne all

>NO PLEASE LET ME BE YOUR WIIIIIIIIFEEEEEE

as his head gets pulled out through his dick back up his ass out through his own throat and then tied in a knot around his nuts

reminds me of that bit in Gaunt's Ghosts where a platoon has a heroic last stand that no-one sees.

Rolled 3 (1d20)

FOR THE EMPEROR!

rolling my last attack

>For the Emperor!

The only correct answer.

The Emperor sees your last stand, is that not all that is needed?

aye, but the passage still gets me every time.

>Nineteenth Platoon were about five hundred meters from Old Hive's north entrance when they saw the gates close.
>Skerral Stopped in his tracks, and pulled the men up. Half his unit was dead. He ejected a cell from his lasrifle and slammed in a new one.
>'Come on,' he said, turning back to face the slope at the waves of assault sweeping in. 'Lets see how many we can kill.'
>The remnants of nineteenth lasted seventeen minutes from the time the gates closed. They accounted for one hundred and eighty-nine enemy casualties. No one witnessed their heroism.

Well shit.
>goes to stab
>fails
>killed

>Khorne can't corrupt Doomguy.
>He gets the second best thing.

Kill yourself.

>Should have stayed in school

>You call that a knife, punk?
>Nah, THIS is a knoife
>And it's bigger than yours

"At least my armor doesn't make me look like a faggot."

>who really has Know No Fear?

loyalist marines

So good

Human souls don't get devoured by Chaos, no Chaos God can claim them unless they worship a Chaos God. It's why Eldar are so fucked without a soul stone, because their entire race is claimed by Slaanesh.

>This is fucking bullshit.

Rolled 4 (1d20)

WITNESS ME, TRAITOR!

AVE IMPERATOR

>Always knew they'd have to send one of you fuckers to try and put me down, might wanna call for backup.

Well, I suppose it shouldn't be too difficult to adapt Age of Sigmar's Hinterlands' Realm Master campaign to 40K.

I clearly state that I am Alpharius. He allows me to leave because suicide isn't acceptable in the imperium.

>"So can I get like, one solid stab in on you before you tear me in half?"

Rolled 2 (1d20)

I swing.

>It's probably winter back home

Yeah you'll probably kill me no problem but that tentacle back there? Yeah that's right, I killed your bitch you chaos fucking faggot.