Galatic Federation

Hello again deligates, ambassadors, speakers and everything that follows. I am happy to announce another session of the Galactic Federation.

Other urls found in this thread:

docs.google.com/document/d/1m-RHzdWkfXWoGUFmOer_tSV7cy1ur1TTsu65Rm6doRY/edit?usp=sharing
docs.google.com/document/d/1iVOLMmIWOOGAAEbb4oQrrDRNUnSdmmiWYxUms8-yLZs/edit?usp=sharing
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Our apologies for missing the last session, or planet is in the midst of a struggle over a new tool known as "fidget spinners"

how did the meeting with the humans go?

What is on today's agenda, Honourable Speaker?

Well the other session the Ascended of the Ogrum-Jett Empire is turing 99 cycles old, and the Guildmaster of the Ogrum-Jett asked us all to bring our finest cusiune to their Ascended as a gift, one wich we at least happily gave

Then it can only be hoped that the Ascended of the Ogrum-Jett enjoyed our gifts.
Has there been any news on the activities of the nearby fallen empire, the Sier-og Regulators?

By the way, for all newcommers. This a lighthearted roleplaying session, where we have fun coming up with new races, encounters and other things in the Federation. It is also highly encouraged to fluff out your species and give them their own history, culture, society, etc.

As an example, I have expanded upon my own speices here in this Google docs:
docs.google.com/document/d/1m-RHzdWkfXWoGUFmOer_tSV7cy1ur1TTsu65Rm6doRY/edit?usp=sharing

I'm using a similar format, hope you don't mind
docs.google.com/document/d/1iVOLMmIWOOGAAEbb4oQrrDRNUnSdmmiWYxUms8-yLZs/edit?usp=sharing

Alright, that's quite enough.
Every world we've rightfully conquered has been getting far too uppity.
It's time to deploy the ADVANCED slavery.

On an unrelated note, we've found ourselves with a surplus of food stores, and invite our carnivorous allies to partake in the feasts.

Shouldn't you do this in the "quest" board to do roleplay sessions ?

Just let it be, it's not hurting anyone

Its more of a worldbuilding here

Screeeech fizzzzzzzz screech brrrrrrrrr uuuuuuuuuuuu fiz fiz fiz fiz come screeeeech die

Oh nooo! Mesa late.Yousa dont be mad, okeeday?

I've had an interesting problem with my grand and Autocratic dominion. Nobody seemed to mind when our Cast System enslaved farmers and industrial workers, other then those farmers and miners but frankly we all agreed to ignore their opinions.

Yet my alien loving population, a small but amusing minority of xenophiles, got upset when our empire was joined by charismatic new space friends that were integrated into the existing cast system!

Given the complexity needed to exempt them and the way the sad xenophiles were being annoying I came up with I think a perfect solution..

No space-foxes get to be farmers or miners. Putting them into research campuses and tour guides at the Unity Monument . Xenophiles are happy because we no longer have any alien slaves.

An ingenious solution!

I must ask though, are your slaves treated well? And did you think about reeducating the xenophiles?

>are your slaves treated well?
I don't understand the question

Are you ensuring that they live and work in safe conditions?

>Are you ensuring that they live and work in safe conditions?

They're... slaves?

But are they treated well?
The Carnifelin Confederacy may have to get involved if they are mistreated and abused.
Wether they are slaves or not is irrelevant, what matters if they are fed and housed.

There must be something wrong with our translators, you keep talking but none of what your say makes any sense

How would you even 'mistreat' a slave

I ensure our translators are walking perfectly, but I shall word my questions differently regardless.
I ask if your slaves have suitable living standards? If they are fed? If they have a roof and four walls to sleep under?

Possibly, why is that relevant?

If you would like to make a google docs for your people that would be appreciated

We at the Carnifelin Confederacy concern ourselves with the quality of life of all of the galaxies species, and would like to be assured that your slaves are at least well fed and have shelter and basic services.

Ah, you have nothing to worry about then. As slaves do not qualify as a species, there is no concern

So they are robotic are they?

No, slaves just aren't people

I'm not sure i agree with that. We may have to approach this issue another time.

Perhaps we should talk about possible AI improvements, which I might say, could replace your slaves?

I greet you all from the 17th dimension dark planet 9, We do not have any ftl transports but have succeeded in creating portals via a form of energy manipulation, would any of you be adverse to trading us some of your dead for research purposes? We can pay in precious metals and gifts of knowledge.

Why do you require our dead? If it is for biological study we would be happy to provide the data.

Biological study and research to determine if our energy manipulation arts are compatable with the biology of your cadavers. We have encountered peoples in the past that were incompatable but still gained greater knowledge through the study, usually fungal or armorphous species. We would be happy to commit resources for a joint study however the manipulation of our energy manipulation has shown to have negative effects on most other races living bodies.

Of precisely what nature is your energy manipulation?

This isn't the first time we have dealt with extra dimensional invaders i'll have you know.

You had better not be trying anything shifty.

The Dicklords refuse to cooperate with your racist "deceny laws" any longer! My people are proud and we shall wear full body coverings NO LONGER!

As long as in public you keep your genitalia, sorry, I meant yourself, covered we will have no problem what you do in private.

Remember the majority is what matters, and the majority wishes you to comply.

When on our planets you must comply with federation laws and rulings.

We've explained before, the requirement for full-body coverings is predominantly a hygeine issue. Your species has an unfortunate habit of secreting fluids that act as transmission vectors for a number of diseases we currently have few treatment methods for.

Within your own habitats you are of course free to spurt and ooze whatever manner of fluids you wish, wherever you wish, but within shared public concourses, we ask you respect other species' right to be healthy and non-splattered.

The Dukedom welcome all our Avian brethren

And We welcome the Dukedom in turn.

We feel no ill towards those of non-avian disposition, we merely hope they can find betterment outside our borders.

While it is sad that non-avians are not welcomed, it makes us in the Federation happy that you welcome at least some species.

Would it be possible for you to reconsider your thoughts on the inclusion of non-avians into your borders?

All Avian races are borne of the Solar Phoenix's feathers that fell in his flight, other races come from their own deities. It's to avoid a conflict ion of ideals.

It is a shame that we cannot persuade you to accept the wingless peoples of the galaxy, We at the Federation understand that the spiritual beliefs of a society are important and will respect your choice.

Would you be willing to entertain the idea of providing support for the non-avian people of the galaxy when it is there time of need?

Keep trying, you'll get there eventually friend

The United Tribes of Taxka have reviewed the proposals by the Vultaum Star Assembly, and are happy to--

Wait a second, you people aren't Valtaum. Fuck, what year is it?

Invent FTL, they said. You'll conquer the galaxy, they said. But what no one fucking told us is that we'd be the slowest motherfuckers in the galaxy.

I post like once every five months and consistently fuck it up every time..

Duke Claws of Burgundy, like his predecessors, has stood by his allies and friends in times of danger, Avian or not

Please tell me you didn't develop FTL for the reason of galactic conquest? As i'm sure you can understand We would not take kindly to any military forays into the combined territories of the Federation.

I also mainly lurk, so I understand your plight my goodman

A respectable sentiment! We would be proud to extend an invitation into the Federation, if you would be happy to accept of course?

Our desire is that the Rock Dukedom and her people enter a status of association with your proud Federation, if possible.

Originally, yes, we intended to burn planets, enslave lesser beings, and ensure the primacy of the God Turtle's will within the galaxy.

That was thousands of years ago, however, and we've realized we just don't move fast enough to conquer anything but each other.

You all are so fast. Have you considered taking time to stop and enjoy the space scenery?

We demand that the Federation forces leave our worlds, or we will take them back by force.

We would be proud to call the great Rock Dukedom an associate of the Federation

It is greatly pleasing to the Carnifelin Confederacy and the Federation at large that you have seen the wisdom of a peaceful approach to life.
While we all wish to slow down and enjoy the niceties sometimes, it is not always possible to do so in this busy world we find ourselves in.

What Federation forces? I assure you we are a peaceful people. I'm sure there will be no need for violence.

The Duke is glad to hear and hopes to develop a fruitful relationship wit your Federation and its amalgamation of races.

We are happy to hear this. I am confident this relationship will develop into a productive and pleasing arrangement for all parties involved.

We would also like if you would extend our message of Avian confederation with those avain nations near or within your Federation

Where's the human ambassador? He said something about alari fluff.

The Technocracy would like to remind everyone that technology is sacred and you are all too filthy to touch it.

SQUALIA~
SEDAYA~
SALA!~

[YOUR HOUR OF RECKONING IS AT HAND, FILTHY XENOS WORMS]
[THE GALAXY SHALL BE CLEANSED AND REDUCED TO DUST]
[NONE CAN WITHSTAND OUR MIGHT]

Ambassadors! The spiritualist fallen empire and the Materialist Fallen empire are almost ready to go to war over what should be on Friday's dinner menu, pizza or tacos?

We will relay your message and invitation to all the avians in our fold.

We have not been in communication with the humans, though this representative of the technocracy, , appears to be similar. Maybe he would suffice?

Are you sure that is a good idea? The current galactic political situation is rather precarious. It would be best if you decided not to pursue such as actions.

What foolishness! Those Empires have been around for more than long enough to know the answer is BOTH!

Da Vorgel bringy da good stuffs! I is presenti to you allz; Spicy Hungo witha munchi Witeo sauce! Is delicacy of da Vorgel! Must try! Lotta for everyone!

What do you mean we are too filthy to touch our own technology? We made it!

Once the scientists have verified it is safe for consumption I'm sure we will all enjoy your delicacies.

Ahh, lovely. Another Federation session is always looked forward to by the Selarians. For the sake of my Macularius Division's lorekeepers, would any of you
newly encoutered species kindly introduce yourselves?

Does the federation prevent wars or intervene in them?

We would like to petition the Federation to intervene on behalf of our people, who have rightfully colonized the planet known as LV-426, to place sanctions on the Human company Weyland-Yutani for their acts of agression against our people.

For years we've been subject to kidnapping attempts and recently, outright attempted genocide by not only Weyland-Yutani, but also humans in general.

We would like to remind the Federation that we not only submitted a formal request to colonize LV-426, but were granted the rights to the planet.

We prefer to prevent them. Peaceful solutions are always prefered.

B-butti! We Iz likey worky with technology! Iffy we no good with the makey and buildy of things, than we Iz useless to greatah galaxy! Youz rules is stupids, and da Vorgel specie's refusy to do this! If you no likey datty, and try to stop us, wez is declare our first evah war on youz!

>Are you sure that is a good idea? The current galactic political situation is rather precarious. It would be best if you decided not to pursue such as actions.

SQUILA~
SENIA~
SALI~

[WE CARE NOT FOR YOUR PETTY POLITICS]
[ALL IS UNCLEAN]
[PRAY TO YOUR ALIEN GODS IN YOUR ALIEN TEMPLES, YOUR DOOM IS NIGH]

We are the Rok Dukedom, a nation composed of Avian races from across the stars

Oh, is daft for da consumpy! So long as youz is ok with da sweet taste, and not allergic to da sweet sweets!

SQUA~
SALIANA~
SENA~

[WE ARE THE ORASH, INHERITORS OF CREATION]
[YOU ARE NAUGHT BUT UNCLEAN FILTH]
[NOT EVEN THE GALAXY UNITED WILL BREAK OUR FURY]

SENIL~

[THIS ONE FORGOT TO ACTIVATE THIS ABOMINABLE ALIEN VIDEO DEVICE]

I'm here, but I wont participate in sessions so often in these days. I have a bit overwhelming agenda on terra

As for the alari fluff, I wrote it in previous thread, but it didn't get much attention 53307060
+Alari creator didn't appear in these days, so...

Oh, Iz onnah d'ose specie's...

>The three and a half foot tall, reptilian ambassador would let out a loud sigh.

Whens we gonna have someone fixi-fixs da spammy filters around heres? Deez messages getting old by da quickie...

Sorry, forgot to properly link the previous thread

I'm sure the Weyland-Yutani corporation do not represent the entirety of humanity, but you shall have you planet as promised.

Would a few gifts persuade otherwise? It would be best if war could be avoided.

I'm sure we will all enjoy them.

SKIRI~
SENKI~
SADYELI~

Ahh, so interesting to see new royalty willing to contribute , we ourselves are a society of myriad reptilian species that were present during the last two Federation conferences.
The Federation has seen its fair share of conflict sir, and if you wish to continue this tone of conversation, there is a certain Representative Jaxara who I'm sure you can talk to.

The first shipment of carbon from allied worlds arrived last month. Extremely cheap carbon nanotube weaves and construction materials will be made available to all members of the federation. We only request that it is used for armor only, and not projectiles. This should greatly supplement our collective defensive capabilities.

SEJAI~
SENAILE!~

[INSOLENT CREATURE, HOW DARE YOU]
[YOUR WORLDS HAVE JUST BEEN MOVED TO THE 2212 POSITION ON OUR CURRENTLY 22212121 LONG LIST OF WORLDS TO ERADICATE!]

We have entered association status with the Fedration. We wish to know if you would be willing to take a race of reptilians from a planet in our space?

SEJAYA~

[GIFTS ARE MEANINGLESS, NOR WOULD WE WANT SUCH TRITE THINGS TOUCHED BY FILTHY XENOS MANIPULATORS]

SEDEYLA!~
SERESHA?~
[GREETINGS, KIN!]
[WHY ARE YOU ON A FILTHY XENOS NETWORK?]

SENALIORA!~
SENE~

[THE 'CONFLICT' YOU SPEAK OF IS NAUGHT BUT PETTY TERRITORIAL AND RESOURCE DISPUTES!]
[WE COME TO BURN.]

We would like to also remind the federation that the Humans killed our matriarch, wiped out one of our colonies, and detonated a nuclear device on a planet that was granted to us.

We would like to ask the Federation to collect reparations from the Human governments in the form of at least 1,000 human hosts to replace our numbers, and a further 10,000 human hosts be awarded to us for emotional distress for the loss of our dearly beloved matriarch.

SAKIDE~
[just passing nearby]
SALIE~
[What is happening here?]

Suitable hosts can be manufactured, if that is required. The humans are unlikely to permit 11,000 of their number to be utilized for reproduction in your manner. Upon review of the genetic dossiers provided to us, yours was not a species that was classified as sentient until recently. Perhaps that is the cause of the human crime?

>The tiny reptilian sentient would seem rather preoccupied by the two pieces of metal he would be welding infront of him.
>After a few moments, the ambassador would pull off the welding mask, and turn of the plasma torch in his hand, before looking up as his view screen.

Iz sorry, were you of da saying somet'ings?

Mmm... an interesting offer. well, we first would have to send a rather large group of missionaries led by a chief of the Pogona Division. In order to determine their willingness to convert to our faith of course.

They exist within a early industrial level of technology, nothing your surely able clerics can't handle. May we inquire to what your faith is about?

Foinally, a speesees I can relate too. You Vorgel types have bin 'ere since da beginning of the Federation haven't ya? Speakin' of which, your mek-an-i-kal prowess is well-reknowned, despite all the trash blockin the comms on my homeplanet of Kronch. We shud keep in touch, us humble Downtown Kronch types could make good use of u Vorgel, what with the tenshuns roising between us and doze Uptown Kronch types.

SERETI~
SINOSE~

[AH, STAY SAFE, BROTHER; MANY XENOS AROUND HERE]
[THE HOMEWORLD HAS OFFICIALLY DECLARED ITS GALACTIC CRUSADE AGAINST ALL XENOS LIFE.]

SEREINEDESHALENI~
[INSOLENT THING HOW DARE YOU ACT SO PUERILE TO YOUR IMPENDING DOOM I WILL PERSONALLY OVERSEE THE SCOURING OF YOUR HOMEWORLD I WILL FEAST ON YOUR YOUNG AND DEFACE WHAT LITTLE REMAINS OF YOUR MONUMENTS I WILL DESTROY YOU]

If you will not accept gifts we will have no choice but to defend ourselves. Consider this a cessation of negotions.

The Carnifelin Confederacy would be more than happen to accept all species.

SAXLANI?~
[really? Never heard it on our national tv program...]
SADILE!~
[then war it is...]

Hazar we have gone over this many times if you wish war it will end the same as the last.

This goes the same for you the Federation does not take acts of aggression lightly.

You might be interested in meeting one of our founding races the Ploraxians they are avians as well.

SINUTILA~

[THESE WERE NEVER NEGOTIATIONS, THEY WERE PROMISES]

SURASHI~
[YEAH, IT WAS ONLY ON CHANNEL 201 FOR SOME REASON]

It would all depend on which nation would be better for them

As we all know, 90% of the spacefaring small mammalian species were mysteriously hunted to extinction 2 cycles ago. I propose a new measure recognizing the protected status of small mammals and an adjunct bill guaranteeing the hunting rights of our species on small mammals, for cultural and religious reasons.

SEROLI!~
[BLASTED VIDCOMS!!!]

SERILOTA!~
[WE HAVE LITERALLY JUST DECLARED GENOCIDAL WAR AGAINST ALL OTHER LIFE, WE KNOW!]

They were negotiations to prevent war! There is no need for violence!

All to true, though I'm sure habitats can be made to accommodate all people of the galaxy.

Sadly though we at the Carnifelin Confederacy appear to be having issues connecting to the rest of the Federation. As soon as the problem is resolved we shall rejoin the meeting.
Great thread guys. If it is still up in the morning I will rejoin.

We would really like for them to consider an invitation to our Duchy

Then we shall do what needs to be done, we can handle the Hazar and we can most definitely handle you.

Ah, it is good that the humans have at last decided to join us.

For what reason is your declaration?