Red flag thread

Actually though,
>Brings up Veeky Forums threads IRL.

>insists on only playing Patfhinder
>has a binder full of houserules
>including a houserule that states that players of female characters must track their menstruation cycle, and during their period, they get a -2 to all ability checks, skill checks, saving throws, and other d20 rolls

Lol a bit harsh.

>visits tg unironically

>Wants the GM to make an exception to banned splats only for him
>Says he'll play X and shows up with Y without telling anyone
>Unpronounceable made up Japanese character name
>Unpronounceable Japanese character name
>Unpronounceable name
>"I got into RPGs because I saw [ebin internet rpg show] and found it funny!"

>Player is a massive history/politics fag
>Player is the kind who will bitch about "boob plate" or other nitpicks in armor design or character art.
>Player is a HEMA fag who insists the weapon stats in the book are wrong or who keeps trying to make up techniques mid-game with no regard for the actual rules
>Player is a Martial Arts fag and keeps making arguments how they can totally punch through platemail without magic.

Realism fags are the worst. Especially when they have no idea what they're talking about.
I've had to kick way too many of them out of games back when I ran more-or-less public games at my college.

>"I want to play Goku"
>"Well, the game has a monkey-people race and rules for martial arts and ki powers, so you can make a character LIKE Goku"
>"I want to play Goku"
>"You can play a character that dresses like him and has similar powers"
>"I want to play Goku"
>"No, you have to make an original ch--"
>"FUCK THIS I'M OUT"

I have witnessed this on several occasions, but only one of them was with Goku. The rest included
>Kurama, from Yu Yu Hakusho
>Dante from Devil May Cry (specifically 4)
>Alucard from Hellsing
>Alucard from Castlevania
>Ichigo from Bleach
>Zoro from One Piece
>Naruto twice and Sasuke five times

It's worth noting I've only ever run into this online, never with in-person games.

I once had a guy try to play out his 8 int barbarian inventing gunpowder by mashing the ingredients together.

>Types Like This
>says shit like 'very well' or 'good day' unironically
>uses /me
>overuse of in-client emoticons

>quotes TV Tropes
>ever

Only including ones I've seen in actual games:

>Character portrait includes a giant erection
>Character description includes penis size.
>Arena fight billing "Mary McSugartits vs a giant octopus"
>Suggesting that giving the country gnolls the "prettyboy bard" for an afternoon as the best way to get information from them.
>Any character named "Dildo", or dildo forming any part of their name.

>Player is a Martial Arts fag and keeps making arguments how they can totally punch through platemail without magic.
I've quite literally tried this; I have a buddy in the same martial arts studio who also does Ren fairs, and one time we tried a spar, both unarmed, him in his plate. I didn't even think I could, but he jabbed, I blocked it, and I punched at his stomach by pure reflex, and damn, that hurt.

Would other races even have menstrual cycles? Or at least, would they have them as often as humans do?

I mean, elves are always described as long-lived and slow-breeding; as are dwarves, to an extent. Seems like they'd do what other apes do and menstruate once every few years, if even that often.

Let's say a human woman has 35 childbearing years (roughly half a human lifetime) and for the sake of simplicity we'll ignore cycles where the ovaries release two or more eggs and we'll assume the woman in question has a perfectly regular cycle (even though that's as much fantasy as elves and dwarves). That gives us 420 eggs over 70 years.

Now I don't play Pathfinder but if I remember correctly the standard life expectancy for elves is around 700+ years. Since they're around the same size as humans we'll say their reproductive organs are roughly the same size. That means they're producing those 420 ova over the span of centuries. They might remain fertile for a longer portion of their lives relative to humans but even if they've got 350 fertile years they're still having just over one ovulation per year. And since, again, their insides are roughly human-sized, I can think of no reason the cycle wouldn't last roughly as long as a human's, other than the in-between phase.

I realize this is very much missing the forest for the trees, but still.

Where do you find lusty zoggers like that?

As realmy as it is, there's some unexplored setting nectar here.

>elves' cycles naturally synch up, every 10 years each village has a fertility festival

Except chakats

>It's worth noting I've only ever run into this online, never with in-person games.
It's harder when they have to look you in the eye.

>joke
We'll see how you feel when it's the table you paid for yourself. When you go through the trouble of hosting the players and providing cold drinks and they don't even have the common courtesy to take a tenth of a second to slip something under it, perhaps even the thing specifically designed to be put under a cold drink! The kind of self-centered myopic ingrate who doesn't use a coaster is the kind of person I don't need in my life, let alone in my game.

>Has fond memories of any d20 based system
>"Kind of like *fucking pleb anime*"
>Detectable body odour
>Uses the word 'evil' in any non-ham context
>Visible confusion over how skill checks in the system work even after the first session
>Has strong opinions about DC or Marvel
>Uses threats of physical violence OOC or IC

You may not appreciate my methods but these are fucking guarantees of a shitty player in my experience.

>brags about being a "Troper"
He was the worst GM ever

>every 10 years
It takes, what, a hundred and change years for an elf to reach adulthood? So I don't think it'd be that often.

I do kinda like the angle that puts on human-elf relationships.
>Twice? In one decade? You are voracious, woman!

At gamestores.

>male playing female character
Often but not always bad on its own. But then once you add
>with rape in backstory;
>her character description starts with her appearance, clothing, or both;
>with an insatiable sexual appetite;
>with a player without many female friends; or
>"bisexual but prefers other girls" with straight player
that's when the warning alarms start to go off.

...

>non-ham context
?
>>says shit like 'very well' or 'good day' unironically
?????

>Types Like This
I never noticed that one before but now that I think about it, that would have saved me a lot of grief.

>his game is set in Japan
>his game is set in a "custom setting" that is generic fantasy, functionally indistinguishable from the Forgotten Realms, but with dozens of new names you have to remember
>he puts real-world pantheons in his game with elves
>his "custom setting" has elves in any capacity
>he unironically explains his character's actions by saying "I'm [x alignment]"
>all the members of a species in his setting speak the same language (Elvish, Dwarvish, Gnomish) except Humans, who either speak "Common" or speak dozens of different languages
All signs of D&D induced creative atrophy.

>Player is a HEMA fag who insists the weapon stats in the book are wrong or who keeps trying to make up techniques mid-game with no regard for the actual rules

You shouldn't have to take a seperate class/archetype just to be able to disarm someone. The gear stats are wrong and often limiting in how someone can play a game.
There's no problem with a player wanting a spear that's capable of dealing 1d6 piercing or slashing. There's nothing wrong with giving most weapons a 1d4 bludgeoning pommel strike or haft striking capability.

>Player is a Martial Arts fag and keeps making arguments how they can totally punch through platemail without magic

What did you mean by this? So its autistic to use weapons differently but a monk can't punh an orc in platemail?

>his game is set in Japan

What if you're doing a Kurosawa-based game?
Kurosawa isn't weeby ...right?

Dude, just play the fucking game. Don't be That Guy.

You are obviously looking for a game that's not D&D

Any context other than either making fun of people who unironically use the term evil, or if they are very deliberately being overdramatic.

TL;DR referring to evil as though it as an actual tangible thing and expecting to be taken seriously basically makes it clear you aren't cut out for my table, noone outside the Forgotten Realms or whatever other functionally identical wankery exists wakes up in the morning and decides how they are going to be evil that day.

I am constantly stunned how some players don't fucking get that any character that has a meaningful level of personhood isn't there to be stabbed in the face for being evil, or to tell you about an evil person who needs to get stabbed, the origin of any conflict is literally just two or more people with reasonably valid personal perspectives who disagree with each other, and hell, most of the time people are just trying to live their lives.

If you see some dude throwing babies into a cauldron, you shouldn't be throwing him into the cauldron after them until you can ascertain why the fuck this became a valid way to put bread on the table, or indeed why someone would do this despite the obvious moral compunctions.

It's too much of a hassle to single-handedly educate people who genuinely believe that morality is about as complicated as the objectives list in an average Call of Duty Modern Warfare level. In the meanwhile, they break my fucking immersion by wandering around with the morality of a five year old ("Anyone who does something that inconveniences me is evil, and therefore doing other evil things that I can stop by killing them.") when their characters don't have any reason to be that retarded in-universe.

If an experienced player wants to have a go at being some kind of overdramatic hammy hero then sure, but at least then I know and any NPCs that can detect derangements or aberrant behaviour through supernatural powers or social cues respond appropriately.

Sounds more like That DM desu fampai.
Without any flexibility you may as well just play a videogame. Though I suppose that if you don't want any creativity in your games I could understand.

Monks are explicitly stated to be magical in DnD.

And I'm talking about shit like
>I should be able to stab straight through a shield with a rapier because rapiers can pierce armor so you should totlly not count any AC the enemy gains from armor. I knpow, I've actually done in it in practice fights!"
kind of shit.

I forgot a few:
>magic items of immense power can be bought and sold in stores that can be found in any city
>he plays video game music out loud during a session and thinks it's emotional
>he has a race/species in which 90%+ of the people are irredeemably evil but the rest are good

Tbh if someone is setting their game in Japan then it's overwhelmingly likely that either
>the game is explicitly weeby, i.e. it has ninja, samurai, magical girls, whatever
in which case it will be trash, or
>the game doesn't appear to have any distinctly Japanese elements
in which case the game might as well be set in fucking Kansas and the GM just picked Japan because he's a closet weeb, and it will definitely come out during play.
There are certainly ways to play a game with distinctly Japanese elements that aren't weeb. The Japanese film industry (real films, not cartoons) can definitely be a source for this (Kurosawa is great but you posted his most weeb-friendly film; something like High and Low or Throne of Blood would be a less cringy template for an RPG. And someone like Ozu or any of the directors of the Japanese New Wave would be better examples of Japanese filmmakers who don't inspire weeb gameplay). However, 99% of RPGs run by Americans set in Japan will be absolutely abominable for the above reasons.

Dude it's not a joke. Do you just not care about your things?

>implying the average Japanfag has even heard of Kurosawa

You're lucky if they have even heard of the Seven Samurai or Yojimbo.

Well I mean, I kinda get what you're saying. I would generally agree IRL that no one just wakes up one day and decides to be a dick.

Honestly though, that's just a nice principle, and when it comes down to it, does it really matter that say, the bandits who have been raping and pillaging the countryside are doing it because of a famine or whatever?
They're still harming others, and they'll probably continue to do so until they're stopped or driven off.
I guess that in this example the absolute most moral way of dealing with it would be to alleviate the root cause and then work to rehabilitate the bandits, but A. that's a lot of work and may lie outside your control and B. the bandits might just be too far gone

I do agree with you on the cauldron example that you should probably ask them why they're doing it if only because it's not obvious what the benefit is. I mean, it could be a dark ritual or some shit

As with running any real world inspired settings, it's probably best to read a book or two about your intended subject

...

Anyone who speaks like they're in an 1800s period drama is on a high-tier of autism. It's not a sure thing, but it's a pretty good red flag.

Ayou, I understood you.

Black mage is not all right. It would take some truly iron mental constitution and great many straightjackets to bring him back to the Light

Okay, so lets deal with the bandit example then, since it's WAY common.

I generally have bandits pursue non-lethal means of stripping people of wealth, for example. They leave people with enough to make it to the next town, certainly.

To subsequently deal with this problem by just killing all the bandits, IE escalating the level of conflict greatly above what was actually in place, doesn't seem like a great way to achieve a moral high ground when you think about it.

But to someone who has never fucking thought for themselves in their lives:
- They are bandits
- Banditry is evil
- Evil must be destroyed
- Ergo, kill all bandits

Particularly for relatively disorganised bandits, what I prefer to see is chains of thought like
- They are bandits
- Banditry is a profession that leverages martial skill and inclination to violence to return usable wealth, but degrades social standing and respect rapidly
- We as adventurers leverage martial skill and inclination to violence to return usable wealth, but also elevated social status and respect
- Extra manpower could be useful, and address the unemployment issues facing these able bodied men

What you run into more often is "Well this is true, but they have to be braver to fight monsters than to turn on their fellow men" at which point murder is still an awful conclusion because you're literally executing them for cowardice. By this logic you should be slaying the fucking townsfolk for giving into the bandits and thus prolonging the bandits reign of terror (I would accept the PCs decision if they reach that conclusion).

>'very well' or 'good day' is 1800s drama speech

>he plays rpg's online instead of having friends in the real world.

How many of the people in Veeky Forums only play online? Never in my darkest days would I have done such a loathsome thing.

...

Yes it is extremely weeby I'm sorry to tell you this.

I do.
Don't think reality doesn't suffer from mostly same shit (miscommunication, That Guys, people who like different things)

Th...that's why you play with your friends, user. People you already know are compatible with you. Do...you think people play dnd in the real world with complete strangers?

>Do...you think people play dnd in the real world with complete strangers?
Yes.

Actually, thinking about this further, if a GM were running a game in Japan and asked me to play I'd ask them to name 3 Japanese pieces of art (films, albums, novels, wood carvings, whatever). If any of them were cartoons or video games, I would not play (I might accept a single well-respected anime if the other two answers were quite good).

Pic related, if someone gave this as an answer I'd want to play in their game.

eggs
>>awwww yis

Tl;dr

>mfw I do both in healthy balance

Are you proud of this post, user?

...

Man, people who get so upset at threads that they have to make "scathing parody" threads are pathetic.

Why you think nobody bothers and keeps posting non-ironically?

I'm fine with people borrowing things from anime myself.

I do mind if someone is literally incapable of describing their character in any way besides "He's basically (character) from (anime)" and either can't or won't elaborate on what their PC is like beyond that.

>Sword of the Stranger
>Ghost in the Shell
>Angel's Egg
>Jin-Roh

If you think anime/videogames are automatically garbage you are without a doubt autistic. Any medium can be used to create art.
That being said if they were to say "Bleach, Naruto, One Piece etc." you should drop them.

Technically you're not allowed on Veeky Forums until you're 18.

No regrets user, ill get the hang of it some day.

Til then

420

Awwwww yis

>brings up greentext memes IRL

Sir Bearington and Old Man Henderson are already put in the list of things I'm ready to strangle someone over if they interrupt the game over for the 3rd fucking time that day.

That and any character submission that references either one goes straight in the trash. I've tossed out a depressing number of PCs over this shit.

Here's some advice: Shitposting is not allowed outside of /b/

Well played. Here's a (You).

That panda is doin' a fucking good job pretending to be a black man

> except 4th

I'm gonna be honest, for as much of a fucking "lets try to replicate MMO-combat" wreck as 4th edition was, I can see why people liked it. Per-encounter ability design is so, so, sooo much better than the Long Rest/Short Rest shit 5e uses, or the Per-Day systems of previous editions.

>"lets try to replicate MMO-combat" wreck as 4th edition was,
I don't agree with this statement, it's not why I didn't like 4e
However
>Per-encounter ability design is so, so, sooo much better than (lots of stuff) ...
Very very much agreed

I liked 4e because Wizards didn't shit on the game after level 6 and magic in general was alot more subdued and reasonable.

In 5e you don't even have to pick fucking opposition schools anymore.

That's why I said
>I might accept a single well-respected anime if the other two answers were quite good
If all they can give me is anime, even if it's quite good, it indicates that they're a weeb, just a weeb with taste.
Oh, and video games aren't art.

t. the physical avatar of the god Pretentius in our lifetime

I do but I'm a truck driver so trying to get a home game going is next to impossible. I miss my group

Butthurt animu fan or butthurt vidya fan?

I've had some good groups online, but in those cases they were composed of people I already knew (e.g. through Discord).

Naught but a mere mortal, my Pretentiousness.

This is the guy that doesn't use the coaster. Hence, why he does not get it.

>Currently not the center of attention in a situation
>Out comes the phone

>Currently not the center of attention in a situation
>Leaves

>the game is explicitly weeby, i.e. it has ninja, samurai, magical girls, whatever
>samurai
>including samurai in a Japan game is badwrongfun
Goddamn you a dumb nigga. That's like complaining that a European fantasy game has knights in it.

But One Piece is (or at least was) good?

as a story its fine, but the anime has horrendous issue's.

Its really just generic shounen shlock, but without some of the issue's that come with that.

I will never understand the appeal of one piece. It's got an ugly fucking art style and some of the most formulaic, stiff, unchanging character dynamics of any anime.

Well yeah, but TTRPGs tend to rely on generic, often shonen-style adventures. They don't have to, but I don't think One Piece is a red flag, either, so long as it's balanced...

I do. I actually had some decent to good groups before. Just gotta dig a bit.

the appeal is that its aimed at kids that don't know any better who eventually grew out of that phase but stayed acclimated to it.

One thing i will give it is creative use of weird powers, but otherwise i agree, it ain't great.

>Tokyo Gore Police
>G.I Samurai
>Kuchisake-onna
Would you join my hypothetical game?

>video games aren't art
Wrong.

>currently not the center of attention
>keeps deciding he suddenly appears whenever one of the PCs is doing something, regardless of whether he knew the thing was happening or not, if he knew anyone was there, or with how far away he was

Had one guy keep doing this, badly enough one session where he was flipflopping where he was and essentially hopping interchangeably between two exchanges that were happening 5 miles apart from each other. We've since implemented the "No Quantum Clerics"(the guy played nothing but Clerics for the longest time) rule that once you decide you're at x location, you stay there until circumstances change.

in and of themselves, the category of media called "video games" is not in and of itself art. Much like how not every plate is fine china.

are there certain games that deserve the label? probably. but not every game ever

No one said that. Not even every painting, sculpture or piece of music is art. however every medium has the capacity to be art.
>video games aren't art
Is an absolute statement about the medium and is objectively wrong.

>watching a podcast

Critical Role has videos.

>he plays video game music out loud during a session and thinks it's emotional
What if I'm running a halo mythic game and playing halo soundtrack since it fits in and sounds pretty good?