Food Thread

Read Dungeon Meshi. Pic unrelated.

Fruit from vines carefully tended by druidic magic for millennia and the wine made from it.

Fruits and vegetables which are magically delicious. Thought other races frequently protest the use of Magically Modified Organisms as an unfair advantage in the competition.

>The beastmen and orcs bring in a massive cage with an angry boar.
>They set down the cage and several warriors take position as the judges look on in confusion
>The boar is unleashed and the warriors set upon the boar fighting it to the death with their bare-hands
>In the background a massive, rune covered meat block is set out and a sleek looking grill is set up
>After some time many of the warriors are wounded but the boar is killed finally having been strangled to death
>The shamen wearing an apron leads the ceremony to ritually cut the various parts of the pig butchering it with great skill
>Various meat dishes are made from the parts and the air is filled with the soul energy of the pig as various warrior spirits from the past bare witness of the sacrifice .

I do. And it frequently makes me thing of food in RPGs.

No one has the baker's dozen screen caps?

Those are some cheap tidepoolers.

For shame!

Tofu, kale and half-caf soy lattes.

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I slightly edited this to use as a flyer handout for my Eberron campaign; just to remove blatant modernisms.

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> Cat's not on the menu.
u wot m8

Gastromancers are an underappreciated magic school

>Broodwich
>This mysterious object from hell cannot be deconstructed or taken apart except for when it can.
>It is the most delicious sandwich in the world except for that it lacks bacon and has sun-dried tomatoes. Which might be a bonus to some but others might think it's kind of annoying.
>Anyone who consumes the broodwich is instantly taken to an alternate dimension where Jerry shows up.
>Jerry is always about 10 levels higher than the PC who eats it and he has an axe.
>If the PC's merely taken a bite of the broodwich he's only teleported there long enough for Jerry to threaten him.
>If he eats all of it then he's teleported there permanently.
>If the PC deconstructs the broodwich a mysterious voice will force him to either marry a skeleton or have brain surgery where he (in his lobotomized form) will obey all of the voices commands which will mostly be to finish off the Broodwich so Jerry can kill him.
>The Session ends before Jerry can do it.

every thread. like clockwork.

I just watched this today and noticed its food porn game was on point. Glad I have a thread to post it in.

catsuka.com/player/kung_fu_cooking_girls

>the MMO meme again
I don't care what the dwarf propaganda says, they're perfectly safe and as good as normal vegetables

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intensely boring, just renamed real-life dishes

bump

>Half' n' Half

>A snack beloved by both young and older ogres alike the Half' n' Half is perfect treat for a tribe on the go. The meals recipe is simple (much like the ogres themselves), preparing well in advance the ogre must first bisect an unfortunate halfling with any knife on hand. Then, after the excess blood has drained, the ogre must fill any available space with smushed goat cheese. After both halves have been filled, they are wrapped up in two separate crude cloth containers and hung upon the ogres belt. The Half' n' Half is usually eaten a day or two later, once it has reached peak ripeness.

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Is that a wrap?

These kind of threads make me hype for battle chef brigade

Bread is magical.

Always loved this art. Love the expression on the veteran's face looking at the fresh faced soldier, looking all nervous now he's actually in combat. All the while the vet is just chowing down on a nutri-wrap.

A E S T H E T I C

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>how to ruin 3 perfectly good steaks

>Mimic confused watermelon and bread.

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Is that popcorn?

If the cuts of meat have been made into something that somebody wants to and is going to eat then really they've done their job.

yep

>Holding out hope for Baker's Dozen

Some crazy roleplayer actually made themed ration meals for a bunch of races.
imgur.com/gallery/BWnHF

I thought drow were supposed to be poor and basal? Why are they eating caviar and escargot for field rations?

Drow aren't poor: their goddess Lloth is crazy obsessed wityh providing for them: the main reason they haven't gone extinct is because lloth makes them the fastest breeding elves, and, when she gets bored of the current crop, she just makes more drow out of whole cloth.

>Implying Snails and Fish eggs wouldn't be a staple of subterranean spider-worshippers diets.

Anybody got the link to that old thread about fantasy fish, plants, and other ingredients?

bump

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Most people here aren't old enough to get it.
I am. Kudos, user, some fond memories of this show watching it with my brother.
Until the last episode ;_;

>The hell is wrong with you?
>You gotta eat, boy, you can't fight on an empty stomach

Alf always freaked me the fuck out as a kid. It's this otherwise charming family show except for this fucking terrifying pet eating pig monster is a main character.

For Link though who have been subsisting on red potions and hearts it is a feast

"Hums the cooking theme"

Lambas?

It's lembas you pleb

Also, does anybody have any ideas for fantasy space food? Like the kind of stuff one would eat onboard the Spelljammer.

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Never played Spelljammer, so I wouldn't really know how you'd make it different from normal fantasy or sci-fi food except maybe to blend it? Weird colored vegetables? Food that's best eaten while still alive, like some kind of big grub that's weirdly delicious? Astronaut ice cream...?

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I always thought good space fantasy food would have lots of exotic sandwiches, and a good selection of imported foods from different planets/planes. Celestian springwater in bottles and rust monster dust-rubbed steak, with a side of Feywyld potatoes in the captains cabin though.

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I know these are mostly chefs and not food, but somebody's gotta cook it.

...Except this guy, I don't think he's a chef. Unless anybody who makes a sandwich is a chef.

(I wouldn't eat that sandwich.)

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Do you think wizards or druids could do anything to ensure fruits that wouldn't usually be in season are available, at least in metropolitan cities? Assuming the druids are willing, for whatever reason; maybe they get something in return, I dunno.

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This ain't a fucking chef art thread, post food or leave.

Why don't you go eat shit, asshole?

I could see an arrangement where druids help farms produce lots of surplus throughout the year in exchange for limits placed on hunting and civilized farmland expansion.

Something that's alive/growing for long voyages.

>that pic
Not sure if cute or disgusting

Good taste.

>goblinpunch.blogspot.com/2014/07/disgusting-peasant-foods.html

Funny article, give it a read

H. peckii isn't edible though

>says the increasingly mutating man again
Fuck off with your knife ear propaganda

All I could hear in my mind watching this were the cries and screams of the tortured during a xenocide.