/swg/ Space Problems

Yeah, I was inspired by that to replace my usual Corran Horn with the Leebo build from that list.

I kept Miranda with her normal load out of Nets and Ion Bombs though. Personal preference..

woops, forgot to namefag.
Thy're mostly the same standard flat gray with the livery done in green instead of red. A few of them probably have custom art on the nose or one of the s-foils.

>Thorn Squadron has custom art on their X-Wings

Considering warplane nose art is usually straight-up softcore porn, what the hell would these hoes put on it?

>what the hell would these hoes put on it?
Alien dongs?

Waifus, obviously.

wouldn't it be trapfus?

Beefcake?

I don't know, but I have seen ladies with their 'maintenance and treatment' of military vehicles and frankly, the latter terrifies the fucking shit out of me.

>Driven through a wire fence, the wire is wrapped around the hub of the rear wheel to the point its seized. Looks difficult, oh well I'll just drive it another 10km anyway
>Speed holes in the floor pan from someone discharging a firearm, in the cabin
>If I park the truck really close to the motor pool wall, captain won't see the HUGE, whale sized dent in the back of it and kill us all
>woops, reversed into CO's truck with armoured vehicle... maybe if we smile he won't murder us in our sleep. No, no that's not working because he was in it

>women and military hardware
>mfw remembering the blood mushrooms greentext from /k/

Post it, faggot.

...

When I was a janitor part-time at my high-school, the womens' bathrooms were just the most appalling shit. Men went in, they shat, they got the fuck out. Women? They went in, they shot the shit, they emptied their pockets onto the floor, they wrote the most appalling goddamn graffiti, they hid tampons behind the toilets. When there was a tampon can in every stall. Girls are fucking savages.

"Excuse me, Admiral."
>Yes, Lieutenant?
"I have a question about Thorn Squadron, sir. Now, I know unauthorized X-Wing decorations are officially forbidden, and--"
>--and the unofficial opinion is that the increases in morale outweigh the lack of discipline. Get to the damn point.
"Well, sir, some of these seem a tad...flagrant."
>"Flagrant"? Strong words indeed. Let me take a look.
...
>Doesn't seem unusual to me.
"Sir, with all due respect, she has her lekku stuffed up his ass!"
>Lieutenant! Thorn Squadron is the most decorated fighter wing in this sector! I'd say that's earned them a bit of flagrance. Now get off my bridge.
>Oh, and Lieutenant? If you'll look closely, that Twi'lek isn't a "she".

Namefagging on this post because why not.
I worked as a laborer at a local plumbing company for a while, did some HVAC too, but whatever. Nearly every single goddamn time a house's sewers back up it's fucking tampons. probably 8 times out of every 10, maybe more often than that.
Rule of thumb was that if you pulled up to a house and you could tell a woman lived there, you could tell her or whoever answered the door that it was tampons before you even start snaking the sewer. I heard from coworkers that they've actually snaked out fucking fetuses and shit. It's even worse when that shit happened at one of the local high schools. Similar shit NEVER happens to men who live without women or in the men's rooms of the schools, it's night and day.

I'll take Things I didn't sign up for, for 100 Alex. Damn, that's horrible

>Girls are fucking savages
Yeah but people start getting cranky when you throw rocks at them to make them go away

>fetuses
Jesus fucking Christ.

The best part is that the most common response to "yeah, it was clogged with tampons" is "oh, well, I don't use tampons, nobody here does. In fact, I don't know what a tampon is!", like you don't have that shit sitting in a fucking bucket in the back of the truck.

Anyone good with Saga Edition willing to give me some advice?
I'm joining a game, we're going to be unaligned spacers during the Rebellion Era, no Jedi Class but Force Sensitives are allowed.

I'm planning on building a Force Sensitive Scoundrel, the GM already approved ties to the Blazing Chain so I'm planning on starting with Force Sensitivity, Force Training and Force Directed Shot. I'm probably going to stick to more misdirection and manipulation with my force powers. Mostly mind tricks and hazes, maybe one or two grip.
Beyond that I'm considering picking up Force Pilot and Rapid Shot.

Otherwise I have no idea where else to build toward, I'm not a fan of most of the Scoundrel talents otherwise. Anyone have any advice or suggestions?

>actually snaked out fucking fetuses and shit

>What happened at work today Bob?
>Nothing
>Nothing happened today, nothing happened yesterday and tomorrow nothing will happen either

I'm using this for my game tomorrow. Somehow.

>Party spelunks a Hapan sewer
>Encounter these things
>Not all of the blood on them is from punching their victims

>tampons down the toilet

What the fuck this it literally 'How to not dispose of your tampons 101' what the fuck

>How was work today?
>I've seen some shit...

Boy, am I feeling glad I decided to get into electrical over plumbing
Dead mice are about as bad as it gets, which isn't much
(Well, aside from wasps, but those are thankfully very rare)

Sup /swg/, I need advice.

I am debating taking out 2 ships from my First Order Crackswarm to put in an ace, but I'm not sure what to add in.

I have a couple of options, would you be able to help me figure out what ace fits my needs best in the current (or before euro results, I have no idea what was up with that leebo+miranda build)

So I've got 3 Omega Squadron Pilot with Weapons Guidance and Crack Shot- that's 60 points, leaving 40 for an ace. What do you think about these options?

- Rexler Brath with TIE/x7, Mk2 engines, and Expertise

- Colonel Vessery with TIE/D, Expertise, and a Tractor Beam

- Whisper with ACD, FCS, VI, and Intel Agent

- Vader with Prockets, Engine Upgrade, ATC, and Lone Wolf/Predator/Juke.

- Some sort of Fat Quickdraw, likely Predator+Advanced Sensors+LWF+Sensor Cluster

So what do you guys think?

Also, man do I wish Pulsed Ray Shielding wasn't Rebel/scum only- That shit would be great for Empire.

I'm in IT.

School IT.

Shoestring budgets everywhere. But at least I don't have to deal with blood mushrooms. Just computers with god-knows-what in them.

Or like the other day, when I had to pick up a "mixed ability" (read, retarded) student's iPad for wipe and restore. Thing was covered in gross stuff that i had to run to maintenance to get industrial strength cleaner for, and it still smelled awful after I cleaned it (because the teacher didn't, even though she was told to).

Force shooters aren't great in general but see if you can't stack the dr 10 talent with equilibrium. Then , see if you can't take surge. Because with all of these things, you can get to really hard to reach places and shoot at your enemies.

Fellator class hhng

Plumbing's got some perks, like I've never known a poor plumber. They get the cash and earn every cent of it too.

I had a school holiday job to make some cash working for a friend of the family, really early computer networking for this doctor that wanted a LAN in his office
(talking real star wars tech- hubs the size of a bar fridge and Co-Axial cable...)
Being the useless teenage cunt I was, got the job of running the cables underneath the house- which is also fucking ancient. So wriggling through 100 years of dust, probably asbestos and mummified cats that had crawled under there, there's also spiders. Big fucking huntsmans the size of a man's hand running around like face huggers out of Aliens, armed only with a drill, torch and bad language.

Not the worst job I've ever had, but it wasn't real good

>Fellator class
>Fellator

Being low man on the totem pole of any physical job gets you a lot of interesting stories. You see a lot of things.

My dad ran an intalling business for floors and cabinets for a few years while I was a teen - made some cash in those years doing it but it was always the most basic shit nobody else wanted to do. You see some scary shit doing tear-out.

>So wriggling through 100 years of dust, probably asbestos and mummified cats that had crawled under there, there's also spiders. Big fucking huntsmans the size of a man's hand running around like face huggers out of Aliens, armed only with a drill, torch and bad language.
That sounds like some Vietnam tunnel rats shit right there.

I prefer the ASSertor.

I'd go with Quickdraw, maybe Rexler if you want something different

You also get to find some great stuff once in a while, helping out a neighbour putting in some wool shed floors we came across some decent sized cedar logs from the 1800's that someone had stuffed under there.
Literally worth 1000's. So that paid for the floors and a few beers, fuck they where heavy though.

During the early days of the Afghan war, we where running around down in Kandahar and had kicked the Tally's out of the area, there was this huge fortress the Soviets had built on a hillock. Underneath though it was successive eras of English forts, local warlords forts and probably all the way back to when Alexander was last there. That was full of tiny little 5ft high tunnels stashed with guns, explosives and all manner of shit- sort of like archaeology for people with guns.

The locals wouldn't go near it because they reckoned it was haunted because the Soviets used to drag people into it and torture them to death by the dozens.
We dragged some damn tonnage out of there and had us a good old C4 fireworks show

>The locals wouldn't go near it because they reckoned it was haunted because the Soviets used to drag people into it and torture them to death by the dozens.
Haunted? Because of a little thing like that? Pshaw. If that's all it took to haunt somewhere, 95% of Russia and Eastern Europe by land area should be haunted wasteland driving everyone who dwells there into utter insanity or complete sociopathy. ....Which would explain a lot, actually.

Ah its an ancient place (literally and figuratively) with a lot of bloodshed and superstitions there. Up the north of the country you could literally run around on the mountains through the middle of the day because most people where terrified of going up there because of the "Jinn's" (forgot the local word) that where like female banshee/vampires who'd throw them off the side of a cliff or get them lost.

Altitude sickness for sure. But hey, any advantage you can get!

>95% of Russia and Eastern Europe by land area should be haunted wasteland
Such is life in the Zone.

And you can bet your ass that sometime in this century, some asshole will decide that hill is a good place for a fort and build another one.

>eventually the hill is twice the size it originally was
>travel down from plasteel corridors into concrete, wood and ancient carved stone tunnels
>find a pile of old rusted out equipment
>pull out a gun with a used tampon in it

>Did somebody scratch "look on my works ye mighty and despair" in the wall?

>Fellator

>endless cycle of forts and demolition
>Eventually, after thousands of years, the site starts looking like pic related
>Remains of a gorillion different forts all smashed together like a Space Hulk made of bricks, old guns, sand, and the occasional used tampon

Poor long-suffering Irish bastard here that lives with a house full of women. All stories about female latrine are 100% true and accurate.

Had a networking job where I had to crawl around in a 130-year-old church and run cat5. Some things never change.

>Which would explain a lot, actually.

Nail on head. Don't ask about the horrible things that made Finland.

More than likely they've already done it. I know the yanks set up shop there for a while and maybe the brits as well after we left.
It was a real graveyard of old soviet shit like T34-85s, ZSU's and BM-21's- all literally stripped down to just a rusty chassis, anything useful like wheels, tyres, copper or engines was looted out of them and carried off long ago. But a real treat to look at as they where mostly things we'd only really read about in books.

In the continuing story of the "Accidentally Kidnapped Luke Skywalker" group:

Last session, the party stole a Star Destroyer with the aid of an ancient droid army. The bounty hunter revealed he was a blood relative of the Emperor and therefore had a claim to the throne. He more-or-less got some of the crew behind him, and sent many messages inciting rebellion to other Imperial ships.

The party discovered fragments of plans for "Project Bastion" (Death Star II) in the S.D's archives and, being good rebels, transmitted them to /everyone/.

Needless to say, Vader and co were pissed, and not the least because the party had programmed all of their surplus battle droids left behind at the fuel depot to sing "Happy Birthday to Darth Vader" in cheap tinny voices. The Empire tracked down the stolen S.D in less than a day.

But the party, while frantically removing tracking devices, wisely parked the ship way too close to a star. The Empire's fleet dropped out of hyperspace... and into a mess of a fight. Outnumbered 8 to 1, the PCs tried to flee, but their ship was hit by an ion cannon shot and partially disabled. Then, the boarding started. With the newly converted Imperial troops turning on them, and Vader personally leading the charge, they knew they were fucked.

The battle was long and bloody. Evil Leia (turned by Darth Vader after Hoth) got into a lightsaber duel with the twi'lek pilot. It went surprisingly well for them both, thanks to their willingness to tap into the Dark Side. The twi'lek isn't exactly... morally upright. Oh, she likes people, but she also gets really angry.

Anyway, the duel more or less ended in a force explosion stalemate, giving them both a chance to escape. Meanwhile, Luke was fighting (and losing) to Vader, but defiantly refusing to give in and join the evil ex-Jedi. The bounty hunter tried to help by locking doors, throwing grenades, and shooting a lot, but Vader was strong in the Force and in the plot armor, and kept marching on.

Anyway, the party managed to escape with most of their Rebel cell + a few Imperial officers + 2 battle droids (of the thousands they left behind), on their incredibly shitty ship, the Wanda.

But before they escaped, in the last few moments, Darth Vader cut Luke in half with a thrown lightsaber. Defiant, but so fucking dumb, to the last, the farmboy adventurer died on the Wanda's rusty ramp. Thus ends the Jedi...

Unless the force ghost of Obi-Wan can convince a very, very reluctant twi'lek to take up the cause.

Good luck, old man.

RIP. Was that intentional by you, or just how the dice shook out?

Also, Darth Maul survived worse

If Vader has Leia, isn't the best move at this point to wait for the inevitable Rule of Two power struggle and go for a decapitation hit during the chaos, given that the Jedi 'Chosen One' prophesy has shat the bed again?

Speaking of Maul, how did he go to the bathroom after being put back together?

>RIP. Was that intentional by you, or just how the dice shook out?

Intentional, more or less. The PCs more or less left Luke to his own devices even after realizing he was a kind of dim farmboy with a laser sword and not some all-conquering jedi general.

Besides, Vader has his second-in-command and successor now. She's politically savvy. She's well educated. She can be trained without endless whining.

Now all Vader needs to do is kill or convert the pretender to the Imperial throne and his path to seize power himself is clear.

He has a shunt in his abdomen that dumps his piss and shit into a plastic bag that has to be regularly changed. Except somewhat higher tech.

Also, Darth Maul kept himself by hate and power. Luke was just... confused. He might come back as an apologetic force ghost.

His species converts its waste into horn growth. True fact.

My game's not exactly strictly canon, so I'm not sure the "Rule of Two" is even a thing. Pic related.

But yeah, Vader is going to get backstabbed by Evil Leia, who is going to form a New Dark Republic if she can get away with it. A senate... with an Empress.

He should offer the "new emperor" Leia's hand in marriage to join their houses in what is most definitely not a trap AND give your party the perfect opportunity to stage a reverse Trioculus.

repmed vitapaste pouch funneling delicious gruel directly into his esophagus at all times

>He should offer the "new emperor" Leia's hand in marriage to join their houses in what is most definitely not a trap AND give your party the perfect opportunity to stage a reverse Trioculus.

Oh my god. That's brilliant. That might actually work.

The bounty hunter's ex (Boba Fett) is going to be /so mad/.

They can probably go even further. If Trioculus and his buddies exist in your campaign, they'd probably be very interested in the news that Vader and his Jedi princess plan on usurping Papa Sheev (assuming the party knows about the usurpation plan). If the party plays its cards right, maybe it could even spiral into an early Imperial Civil War.

Oh, it's already Civil War time. Vader has all but declared the Grand Imperial Armada he built (to track down and kill Skywalker, you see) is beyond the Emperor's control. Right now there's no overt conflict, but the Death Star II is online ahead of schedule. Sheev's just waiting for Vader to make a stupid move... like marrying his daughter to a pretender to the throne. Right now, neither side is in position to crush the other, but it will happen soon enough.

I don't think Trioculus exists though. Despite the memery, it'd be a little... silly.

>Despite the memery, it'd be a little... silly.
frankly, all things considered, introducing Trioculus would be the least silly thing you've done

>it'd be a little... silly.
God forbid anything silly happen in your super serious and angsty game about accidentally derailing the Star Wars canon right off a cliff.

You're probably not wrong, but I've been trying to stick to "only the OT is canon, and we'll make the rest up as we go along." This means no Mandalore, no magic lightsaber crystals, and no need to deal with every other author's ideas for stuff.

don't forget the part where he jacks off to his wife's character trying to fuck luke
I am actually starting to suspect this whole campaign is a really elaborate magical realm and he's posting about it here to satisfy his exhibitionist tendencies

>don't forget the part where he jacks off to his wife's character trying to fuck luke

Wait, you thought I was serious about that?

And I'm not sure how I can prove that the game's real. I can try to scan in the character sheets if you'd like? I mean... it's not like it's that ludicrous of a game.

I think you're both misreading the statement, which is totally my bad. I didn't mean "my game is /serious business/ and a three-eyed weirdo would be terrible. I meant "It'd be strange to include Trioculus because the game doesn't rely on much other outside-of-film canon, and I can't think of a good narrative reason to include him at this point, aside from Veeky Forums jollies."

My actual point, my towering sarcasm aside, was similar to in that your game is already so silly, he'd fit right in.

as I said before, you've already got so much crazy nonsense going, would your players REALLY have any idea that this crazy three-eyed motherfucker is from the dankest depths of Legends rather than your own imagination?

Seeing as the Empire already appears to be politically divided, the PCs could feasibly get involved in the cloak-and-dagger world of Imperial military/intelligence politicking. Both Palps and Vader are going to need allies, and Trioculus' connections to the Grand Moffs do have the potential to make him a powerful contender in the impending ICW. Plus, everyone has to stop by Kessel at some point, right?

You two make a fair point. But I think that the whole "Marry the pretender to the Empire to Evil Leia, at a ceremony presided over by Darth Vader, and then lead a combined Rebel, Pirate, and Imperial fleet to take on the Death Star II" is sufficiently complicated that adding in a new element might be silly.

Who knows? Leia and the Bounty Hunter might even succeed in bringing Vader back to the light-ish side via a ludicrous sit-com style event. You know, make him remember what it was like to be loved, and to be happy, and to feel any emotions other than rage and sorrow.

Or he'll just choke them all to death and take over the Empire himself.

>feasibly get involved in the cloak-and-dagger world of Imperial military/intelligence politicking.

They could, but their specialties appear to be havoc, murder, and misinformation, not clandestine deals and backstabbing. They might try and convince some Grand Moffs that their rebellion will be more rewarding than life under an increasingly brutal and unstable Emperor, but that's about it. Maybe they'll try and convince some Imperial leaders that they could be "kingmakers", and feed their dreams of glory.

>>everyone has to stop by Kessel at some point, right?
>"Remind me again why we're doing the Kessel run at maximum speed? It's ludicrously dangerous even if we manage to dodge both ICE and slavers."
>"Some corp bigwig promised us 300,000 credits and a brand-new ship if we could deliver, quote 'A barrel of bomb-ass motherfucking genuine uncut Kessel spice, the good shit. A literal barrel. Like, a hundred liter barrel filled to the fucking brim with spice.' And he wants it delivered to the drop point in under a week and a half, or no deal."
>"Okay...where is the drop point?"
>"Says here, 000001 Main Street, 200th floor penthouse, Santhe/Sienar City, Lianna"
>"...Mother FUCKER."

obligatory
>In a CAVE with a box of SCRAPS!

youtube.com/watch?v=uHZJej98_T0

>Raithe and the Band-
>youtube.com/watch?v=uHZJej98_T0

GODDAMMIT!

'Things is didn't sign up for,'

Underrated post; had a giggle

>Tion bound and down, loaded up and truckin'
>We gonna do what they say can't be done
>We've got a long way to go, and a short time to get there
>I'm Tion bound just watch me on Kessel Run

New Top Gear chapter posted. This time, the team takes a trip to Manaan to see if they can race speeders for less than the price of golf.

>name hasn't been changed to X-Wing:Grand Tour

We don't talk about X-Wing Ball: GT

Anyone have a link to the Imperial assault campaign guides? I want to run it online for some friends on tabletop simulator, but I cant find the guide books.

Great Space Truckin' Songs of the Rebellion!
A-Side
youtube.com/watch?v=Mynzbmrtp9I
youtube.com/watch?v=xvaEJzoaYZk
youtube.com/watch?v=LG9krB7_xAg

Does anyone else feel like the way ion and tractor effects work in X-wing is a little retarded? The whole point of them is seemingly so you can control the movement of ships and keep them where you can get to them and attack them, which you really only need for high mobility ships that arc dodge or just move around a ton like protectorate fighters, strikers defenders, maybe A-wings or K-wings, but most of those ships are the same kinds that are highly likely to be able to easily evade ion or tractor cannon 3-die shots through high natural agility, evade actions and upgrades like autothrusters. You can hit all of them easier with bombs I guess, but with bombs comes the issue of having to have the mobility to get to where you need to drop them first which is why you don't see people running bomb loadout Y-wings. There's also the ion torpedos which are 4-die but since modifying torpedos sucks for everyone but jumpmasters they don't seem significantly better against the ships you most want to get the effects on.
The ships that ion and tractor effects generally end up actually hitting are low agility small ships like B-wings and Y-wings which really don't need more shit fucking with their already ass mobility, and low agility large ships like the decimator, shuttle, ghost and falcon who hardly get affected by them anyway because of large ships handling the tokens differently. It seems like instead of controlling the movements of the ships you'd really want to control the movement of, tractors and ions just fuck more with ships that already have enough issues getting where they want to be.

Once afain asking: disciples of harmony pdf - when?

Theoretically, later today. An user said their copy was arriving on Monday, and they'd scan it then.

That said, most of the new non-fluff stuff has already shown up. Highlights from last thread are here:
Full thread of new stuff is here:
community.fantasyflightgames.com/topic/251120-i-have-disciples-of-harmony-you-have-questions/

puts an interesting SPIN on it

...

Not to go all SJW in a thread about nerds and spaceships, but this shit happens because sex ed is so fucked.

50% of the US population does, has, or will menstruate; and yet girls are embarrassed about it and boys are disgusted by unused, dry tampons.

All sorts of weird sexist conservative gender role shit stops anyone from ever sitting all the teenagers down and explaining menstruation and tampons, and so they're just sort of left to their own devices and whatever devices their friends and family members pass down to them. Imagine if that's how toilet paper was treated culturally - if people were grossed out just by holding sealed packages of it, and however your dad disposed of toilet paper after he wiped his ass is what he passed down to you, and half the people never even learned to wash their hands after.

Hell, when I was in school, our teacher had to explain condoms off the record because we had a retarded abstinence only curriculum. And that was in Ohio, not Alabama.

intelsweep.wordpress.com/2017/06/05/keeping-score-worlds-and-euros-top-8/

Write-up of the lists at Armada Worlds and at EU championship (not by me, just sharing).

Copypasta summary:
1. Based off the information we have (15/16 lists) no one made Top 8 at either event with less than 5 activations, in fact the average was greater than 5 at 5.53333333.

2. Unsurprisingly given point one, flotillas were almost omnipresent in most fleets. 48! 48 flotillas were taken in the 15 lists we have data for, and only a single list did not take at least one of them. Again, just like activations the average was very high at 3.2.

3. Squadrons were also present in heavy numbers in both sets of Top 8. The average across the 15 lists we have is 102.666667 points spent on squadrons. A sub-point to this is that middling amounts of squadrons are nowhere to be seen.

They're harder to hit with them, but ion and tractor are incredibly punishing for interceptors and their kin.

How do we solve the mandalorian fanboy problem?

So would you bring that same Quickdraw? with 40 points free, I can put pretty much any build I want.

I'm just not sure what's the best call for the current meta- or If i should take an Ace at all, and just stick to 5 FO's instead.