/cyoag/ - Cheesy Yogurt on Asian Goats

Inaccurate Title Edition

Last Thread: Pastebin: pastebin.com/vrqYhnpu

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How is it every Mystery Box is shit. Does anyone ever pick these things thinking it'll work out well?

...I picked it and don't regret a thing.

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I picked it for pick a Goddess cyoa and she was best girl until he removed her because anons got into a hiss fit

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>Goddess cyoa
Oh hey, that hasn't been posted in a while!
Time to dump.
01/09

Mystery boxes fuck you over or are the best thing since sliced bread i think it is worth the gamble

Posting the real V.2, Because I forgot to change T1 Money to a lower value
Last modification, thanks for all the feedback.

02/09

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09/09

Alright. Taking a break from dumping now.
Your turn, everybody else!

Making a make-your-own-mechabeast CYOA. Would people prefer it written from the perspective of a computer who really wants your dick, or in a Grimderp "nothing you do has meaning, go out and leave what mark you can" kinda way?

Computer that wants my benis

The second option is more appealing to me.

What about one waifu(potential) cyoa instead of choosing a bunch of them

Computer

>everything is waifus and wants your dicks even inanimate objects

Why not just a normal logical no-nonsense computer, which is designed to set you up for success?

Well, that cleared everything up nicely.
Too boring to write desu
The only interesting build-a-vagina CYOA, 'cause no matter what you do you're dealing with the same actual character.

>Too boring to write
Fucking Hideauze scum.

Hey user, I heard you're making yet another generic waifu cyoa. That right?

Reposting Pervy-Super Person

Don't worry user. Your mechabeast will set you up for success!

Can I be a superhero but not be slutty/have sex? Because this looks like the most indepth superhero cyoa and I like that, but I'm not a fan of anything but monogamy.

This is a rape to what is mythology.

Feels good, huh?

rape is pretty integral part of mythology

Yeah, but not to the concept of mythology itself.
He doesn't even mention that my waifu Athena is a strong and independent woman that need no man.

Nothing's stopping you from just killing everything.

I don't feel that this brings anything new to the table whatsoever desu

Technically speaking, you could probably get a pretty decent build without taking any modifiers, but you'd need a lot of adversaries.

That's fine, it was my first CYOA I'll get better ideas once I understand and play with CYOAs more.

From the looks of it those are all various fetishes and they will all rape me or otherwise do awful things to me. I'm not keen on that.

Computer what desires the bepis.

>cheesy yogurt on asian goats

Very comfy. I actually have some good goat cheese I was saving for an occassion.

Mythology is some random asshole inventing an explanation for an idea or phenomenon that everyone likes, then having absolutely everyone else write fanfiction for that mythology until the culture goes extinct. Gods drift in what they represent or who they are over time. You can see this in the evolution of ancient El the war god of the Caananite pantheon, to the Yahweh of modern Christianity. An entity that is almost completely different from where he started to where he current is.

So in that sense, a CYOA that alters the mythology of the gods is entirely keeping in line with how mythologies change.

>goddesses of chastity lusting after human NEET penis
>this is a completely natural evolution of mythology

user, please.

Don't presume to know the gods.

Well yes, considering even your beloved Athena ended up having a bunch of myths of her being pseudo-raped just so some priest who amounted to a fanfiction author could claim someone was descended from her.

Frogposters should be shot.

Also, for another virgin goddess, Artemis was on the very edge of breaking her chastity for the sake of human penis until she was tricked into killing the guy she was crushing on, Orion.

>goddesses of chastity lusting after human NEET penis

They have good taste. Nothing wrong with that.

Imagine a demon king was cursed to live like a human outcast for a 1000 years. You guys think he would understand human pain and seek redemption afterwards or just go batshit insane with desire for revenge?

I dunno depends what kind of outcast.

How sure are you that the Minoan precursor to Athena was also specifically a goddess of chastity? And the transition of "Athens' collective waifu" to "someone's specific waifu" is much less of a transition than "violent bloodthirsty war/storm god" to "vaguely benevolent pseudo-deist unmoved mover" Yahweh underwent.

A NEET.

We both know rape isn't the same as consensual sex. It's also pretty established that Goddesses tend to fall in love with complete Chads.

Honestly, that's what bothers me most. I refuse to believe a literal goddess would want to match up with user of all people.

I'd certainly be addicted enough to human entertainment to want to preserve humanity at least.

Well if this is just another 'user sucks!' argument then you're way too boring for me to want to talk to, because you pull this every thread.

Either would work. He could also just no longer care about who he was before because he's been living a human life for a goddamn millennia, and that's a long time to both nurse a grudge and feel sorry for himself.

Premise of my cyoa. An angel descends from Heaven and goes: "teehee demon king, now that you've spend a 1000 years as a human you must understand human pain. Come with me to heaven and apologize for your crimes".

user has the option of accepting, effectively not playing the cyoa. Or punching the bitch in the nose, tearing out her divinity, and rekindle your demonhood or whatever.

There's just no point in making it if everyone is going to accept heavenly judgement.

Of all the cyoas, you choose to drop this argument on one where physical form is probably the least relevant attribute and where the whole premise is that waifus have gotten tired of gods who act like turbochads?

>user has the option of accepting
I'm picking that. Why wouldn't I? I have no memory of being a demon king and I get to go to Heaven, the only utopia that can ever exist.

>not teaching the angel the joys of NEETdom
>not relishing her initial joy at being freed from responsibility and later regret at feeling worthless
>not dragging all of heaven down with you into the comfiest hell on earth

Corrupting heaven with games, pizza and JoJo's Bizarre Adventure? Count me in!

>user has the option of accepting, effectively not playing the cyoa. Or punching the bitch in the nose, tearing out her divinity, and rekindle your demonhood or whatever.
You could make it about accepting the offer instead, making some comfyshit CYOA? And have an edgy mystery box where you say "fuck you beeetch"?

>geez, I'm so tired of fucking Chaddeus with his lousy divine beauty and monstercock
>just because he's the pinnacle of male beauty doesn't mean he can be a jerk
>screw him going rough on me and strangling me while giving me 64578 orgasms a second
>oh, I'll know!
>I'll get myself one of those hypersexual NEETs with mommy issues and a narcissistic personality disorder
>what's a NEET going to do lol... ABUSE ME FOR MAKING UNSALTED TATERS?! XD

I'd definitely go with . Why would I hold a grudge against a Heaven I no longer remembered, and why would I apologize to them for deeds committed so long ago all my mortal victims would be dust if I hadn't tormented them? I'd just flip her the bird and maybe use the vestiges of my demonic powers to spice up my life.

Don't worry, I still pick our one true lord and savior every time.

I'm going to agree with , since I have no memory of being Demon King, it's a bad hard to get angry about losing it.

Crazy computer that's in love with you

Don't offer user a choice, so you can make your CYOA anyway without the NEET posters invalidating it.

Fujo/fatty/frog.

God damnit. Fine, you're all getting a waifu. I'm judging all of you.

That was awful. I hope you're not a man.

I can handle your judgement.

Know that I at least love death robots a whole bunch too.

>Computer that's crazy in love with you.

ftfy

I'm not. That's why I find the whole concept ridiculous. First I'd do if I were a goddess is make a harem of George Clooney, Taylor Lautner, Channing Tatum, and whoever else strikes my fancy.

If you think I'd shack it up with a NEET then just lol.

>I'm not.
I don't believe you.

Don't make excuses for what you're doing with your own hands.

>waifufags bully another author into catering for them but god forbid someone even dares bring up husbandos

Believe it. Only a woman could be that cringey and unfunny.

I like you better when you fat post

Maybe try losing your virginity to a human girl before you go around thinking you'll be batting goddesses off of you.

/r9k/ really ruined this place. When did we go from adventure and challenge to waifus and NEETdom?

Maybe understand that some people can clearly separate reality from fantasy.

Waifus are wanted because real women are terrible and life sucks.

The funniest part to me is that he automatically assumes that all gods are impossible good at sex.

If he's ever read even Greek myth, he'd see that basically nobody is described like that, and plenty of gods sleep with mortal women without going insane or breaking like they would if they could do that, and that plenty of goddesses end up with mortal dudes.

Am I the only person here with a job and a loving gf?

Fuck off. There are better places for that shit.

Does a bear shit in the woods?

>it's another "virgin thinks he's a sex god if only he got a chance and fuck Chad he's a bad fuck anyway" episode

Polytheism
Tiamat
Hastur

Comfort City
Legendary Hero: Tomyris 2
Great Forge 4
Great Market 6
Diners 8
Increased Strength 9
Animal Motif 10
Increased Endurance 12
Mythical Beast: Behemoth 14
Shape shifting 15

Evil Prankster +3
Trials of a Hero +6

WE GILGAMESHING NOW BOI! (also hastur is cute )

No but Veeky Forums -> Veeky Forums -> /cyoag/ is like three layers of self-selecting for dweeps.

You say that like I haven't had fantasies about an insane yandere robot wanting my dick ever since I first played portal

You know what? To hell with all, I am going to make a build.
>Polytheistic(+6)
>Athena (+9)
I always liked the idea of a possessive girlfriend because I like to receive help and I am a chill dude. If she wants to go crazy if I don't want to do something she can, but normally I know how to defuse most situations.
She was my favorite goddess. It's a little sad that she never married or pursued, but at least she is not a slut like the others.
>Minerva (+9)
Is going to be fun with these two. She is basically the Athena of the romans.
>Confort Archaic
>Evil Prankster (+3)
> The Trials of a Hero (+6)
>Legendary Hero*3 (-6)
Hercules,Ulysses and Gilgamesh. Those guys are awesome.
>Mystical Beast (-2)
Echidna.
>Youthful Springs (-2)
>Entertainment Center (-2)
>Great forge (-2)
>Academics (-2)
>Diners (-2)
>General Market (-2)
>Confort Control (-3)
>Increased Strength (-1)
>Clones (-2)
Is cooler when every clone is you, not just another you.
>Increased Endurance (-2)
>Shapeshifting (-1)
Always wanted to fly like a bird, swim like a bird and fuck like a dog(just a joke, or maybe not :3).
>Domainship (-3)
I have to work somewhere, I go crazy if I don't have work.
>Animal Motif (-1)
For the las point.
>Romantic Dates
>Meeting the Family
>Grand Balla
>Activity Day
>Hobbies Hobbies
>Raising Demigods
There you have it, fucking perverts. I just want to live forever (if some one want to kill bad for me) a quiet and productive life, if they don't want to fuck so be it.