A scout arrives with news

It travels down the line at the speed of light rules as written.

Then rules as written the last peasant makes an attack roll and throws the rod like 20 feet.

That's a peasant railgun.
We're talking about a pleasant railgun.

>I am the 44th heir to the throne of the kingdom of misery
>On the day of my ascension, two of my guards attempt to assassinate me
>Over the next 5 years, I have survived hundreds of attempts, each time gaining a new scar or disfigurement
>The days drag on and I am terribly miserable by this point
>Finally, war is declared against us
>I personally volunteer to lead the army, hoping I am killed in glorious battle somewhere other than the shithole I reign over
>Get killed by a drunkard moving at the speed of light before we even fully muster

Clarification:

Is it a railgun that fires the concept of pleasantness? If so, I commend my neighboring kingdom and send gifts.

Or is it an aesthetically pleasing railgun? If so, then I must have it for myself, and plan an attack to steal this master-crafted railgun!

>Scuse me ma'am
>If'n it ain't no bovver
>Could I leave a sonic boom as I pass by?

Send a congratulatory letter regarding their new high speed mail network, along with a copy of the Player's Handbook.

Complain on Veeky Forums about how OP conscripts are.
(*^_^)

What sort of ammunition does it fire? What would be appropriate for a pleasant railgun?

>Rolled up sunset landscape drawings
>Bundles of fresh laundry
>new pillows

I imagine it's those tiny mint chocolates hotels leave on your pillow

But what if you find those horrific? Are you immune to the Pleasant Railgun then?