In an effort to find them employment, All caravans, adventuring parties, and entourages will receive an Oni "Cultural Guide" during their stay in The Land of the Rising Sun and Moon.
The Nippon travel agency is not responsible for the depletion of liquor stocks or personal injuries obtained as a part of your travels.
Other urls found in this thread:
>Adventuring parties, Caravans, and Entourages
Does that mean I'm free if I take a trip alone?
Available on request.
Is Oni delinquency on the rise or something?
Are king Enma's ranks outsourcing?
Even one man can be adventuring party when his destination is of great importance.
>In order to find employment, the Oni start to flood 'not' Europe by droves.
>Towns and settlements throughout the land are now terrorized by drunken hordes.
>Except for the dwarves, who think this is hilarious.
That's about hen the beer drought kicks in
> Mass layoffs from hell, a large number of people are how'd of work in there only skill-set is being large strong and brutish.
> the only real work available as mercenary Adventure or Bandit.
> the market become saturated. Which leads to unemployment depression and alcoholism
>that hentai
>straight
I remember the cowgirl's' introduction quite fondly, user.
An ancient evil has awoken.
On your sofa.
She moved in a few days ago.
>All caravans, adventuring parties, and entourages will receive an Oni "Cultural Guide
Only if the Oni wear qt meido uniforms.
Young oni just loitering bothering pedestrians jusk asking for booze and not earning. Its sad.
I fear for this generation n
Well, mostly straight, like, straighter than usual.
>some are deemed responsible enough for henchmen duty and are thus forced to smite their less well off troublesome counterparts
Oops forgot
AAAND this is how not-Japan entered a new age of isolation and irrelevance.
Mission accomplished
Meanwhile the Wood-Elves are using their druidic magics to build border walls to guard their woods while shipping all the Oni who make it to their border to the Dwarves in the North-West.
The Dwarven Chancelor was infuriated when her? plan to fuck over the Wood Elves failed like all the previous attemtps.
Now the Dwarves are threatening the Elves with economic sanctions.
Tough to implement when Wood Elves only need Potato-Druids to produce food and booze.
I see you are a man of fine taste sir.
You're handling thing wrong. The Oni are a vulgar and immature people. All you have to do is tell a particularly dirty joke or show them your junk and they'll laugh themselves into unconsciousness.
They laugh ironically at the jokes, but get too caught up in the irony.
Eh, whatever
>Potato-Druids
Gonna be my new slur for Russians desu.
You're just trying to sleep with me aren't you? "Oh, I'll just go put on my big gay cloak!"
Oni eat people, so expect them to get massacred en masse once they start their shenanigans.
Human cannibal tribals also eat people, doesn't mean you can't make them stop.
>Oh, so that's the little fucker who talked shit to ya when ya got here, huh? You want me'ta go knock his dick in?
>No it's fine
>Ya sure?
>Yes, I'm sure. It's not that b-
>'Cause I could do it, y'know? Smack him hard enough ta turn his outie in'ta an innie. I've done it before.
>You'd have to get though his Oni cultural guide first, I think
>Inama? Bitch is too drunk to keep her tits in. You just waita minute. I'll be riiight back.
>whatdidijustwitness.jpeg
>Told ya.
>So how long can you stay with the caravan?
>How much booze ya got?
Oni have rivalries between each other and boast who has the best escort.
The real strong ones like to boast how they have lords and ambassadors as their contract, but are often spoiled with their drinks so much that they don't do much protecting.
I imagine telling an oni how being paid money also works would go like that one simpson clip.
youtube.com
>So what, ya just go upta anyone and throw money at 'em and they throw booze at ya?
>If they have wine or liquor, yes. And if they want to sell to you, yes. Some people take...issue with certain races.
>I don't like the sounda that.
>Well, some people think Oni are too loud and break things, so they won't sell to them.
>Oh do they now? How about you?
>You're literally the only reason I haven't died yet. If you wanted to yell me deaf, I think I could manage.
>Sweeta ya ta say that. But this money stuff. It's like, what, an offering?
>In...a way, I suppose. More like trading. Except money is good for anything. The other guy doesn't have to want what you have, because if it's money, he can turn it into anything he wants.
>So how much money do I get?
>How much do you want?
>Well fuck me, I dunno. What, a hundred?
>Really? A hundred?
>What? Too much? Not enough?
>No, it's just not what I expected.
>Well fuck me! How'm I supposed ta know how much ta ask for?
>I don't know? I've never negotiated caravan guard pricing with an Oni before.
>Fuck it, I'ma just say gimme booze and call it a day.
This is awfully counter-productive and sounds like an evil plot by the government to destroy filthy gaijins
Ah yes, I see why quests had to die now.
This is essentially a world building thread, shush.
Either that or to distract the Oni which are unemployed and their skills are much suited to banditry
>Complains that quests are dead
>Instead of starting a quest thread
It's like you didn't even care that much in the first place
Got any sexy male Oni?
...
"God damn it, I knew I should've specified gender. Aw, fuck it, I'm too plastered to care; ya can start now as my guard/eye candy. Knock 'em dead, champ! Zzzzzzz......"
Every time someone makes this post, another potential QM decides not to run a quest because the board is dead.
Not that they'd need robots if their young people were actually willing to make eye contact with each other.
Is...is that good or bad? I can't keep track anymore.
>tfw spirit shaman
>implying I need an escort
I can turn my soul into a fucking wooly mammoth
So Oni immigrants are getting affirmative action?
>mfw Oni "sexual emergencies"
At the very least they're getting diversity hires
>Momotaro at the Island of Ogre/ss/.
Why not some cultural exchange program? Im sure some European devils would love an opportunity to experience Nippon lifestyle.
By definition as a spirit shaman aren't you always being escorted?
>rapefatty's bootleg polandball ft. 200% less funny jokes
Fuck off.
Eat shit questnigger. You aren't welcome here anymore.
Jokes on you
Those are the loli orges
Who is this nefarious black-haired imp?
I wish oni girls would stop thrusting their crotches in people's face. Especially when all they're wearing is an unwashed fundoshi.
The barely-constrained terror of the post-apocalyptic East Asia, loyal only to a mandarin of the Imperial Government.
How fearsome!
You kiddin'? We need as many of them as possible to offset the shitposters and /pol/ that are flooding in.
Bringing in worse people to offset shit people is a terrible idea
It's why funding terrorists to kill terrorists keeps backfiring, they're still fucking terrorists
>People who like roleplaying and stories
>Worse than shitposters and /pol/
At least the worst politics in quests was just >"Don't waifu first girl before we see the rest!"
>"Fuck it, you waifu'd first girl, guess we have to go for Harem now to keep everybody happy."
yes they are because i can ignore /pol/ and /pol/ threads numerically > quest threads and get banned.
Also
DAT TRIBAL FINKING.
i need more people to fight my war, who cares what happens next.
Good thinking my dude that never goes wrong i mean chamberlane had the same feeling about fascism fighting communists HA. and we all know nothing bad happened there and chamberlane is remembered well by everyone.
I like this characterization a lot. The Oni here don't seem evil or wicked, per-se, so much as they seem rude, crude, boisterous and a little dumb. They're prone to use violence as an answer to all their problems because when you're a ten foot tall wall of muscle, violence works more times than it doesn't. Even within social situations casual violence is the norm because they tend to assume that everyone else is more or less as indestructible as they are.
good taste
Oh please. It's a soft porn magical realm thread and you know it. I'm surprised Op didn't start out by mentioned his fetish musclegirls demand sex from every male they encounter.
Same. I like this framework a lot. Prudes be damned.
They say she can make men punch themselves with a single thought rather than face her directly, and that she can drink a whole tavern dry in an hour.
Man, quest guys are WAY better than /pol/ guys.
Don't tease me user
Well, the Halfling will be /this/ close to peeing himself the whole time we're there, but the Half-Giant will be happy to finally see doors big enough for him to walk through normally.
Requesting MOAR like these.
OH LAWDY, this lady is gonna be the cheapest guard to pay out of the lot.
Do you think she knows the difference between good beer and shit beer? Maybe she'll just drink both and not give a fuck.
>crushed pelvises
That's why you need to know a good cleric
>you will never be a shota cleric with an oni who forces you to use most of your healing spells on yourself just so you can walk in the morning