Times a character or game revealed uncomfortable things about yourself

Sounds like you have a good DM or a good party member. I envy you.

Yeah, I know consciously my feelings about myself when depressed aren't the reality, but thanks. Noticing that my character was a reflection of them was still an unexpected jolt - an unpleasant thing I thought was gone revealed itself alive and well, in a place where I'm usually having a good time.

It was actually in Neverwinter Nights
I've only ever played in persistent world servers
My real world D&D experience has never gone past 1 session

>Make female character
>Be massive cockslut
>Realize I want to suck dick in real life too

>always play tanks or fighters instead of the party face, I'm not bad at charisma I just think it's more fun to hit your way out of a situation than talk
>gets boring after a while, decide I want to play a bard for our next game, give diplomacy a shot
>"you should really stick to what you're good at, user"

>Times a character or game revealed uncomfortable things about yourself

The long-running 3.5 campaign I DM is reaching PC levels 18, 19, and up. Designing the fluff of these encounters is ok, but the crunch is sooooo terrible...
Then I realized, I just hate doing math.
And I graduated from one of the top 5 engineering colleges in the US

I avoid every situation even related to that because of my fetish.

In fact, that behaviour in itself is broadly-applicable to not just fetishes but psychological issues and desires, to the degree where it is probably similarly unhealthy. I am a little too frightened of being "that guy" or being unaware of or out of control of myself, and it takes me out of the game because it is a form of metagaming too. I'm not playing my characters when I do that, I'm just hiding, or something.

After my sixth character or so it was pointed out that almost all my characters had some horrible scarring/deformity, and/or wore a mask of some kind. They were good characters, but jokes were made that I had a mask fetish. I think I'm the only one who realized it had a more personal implication about my self-image.

That's gotta be painful

don't worry about it, it's just a game of pretend.

>handing out $20 to homeless people just because I can,
Don't do that. They just buy drugs.

Keep a box full of carabiners and CLIFF bars, etc. in your car to dole out.

I've never had an 'aha' kind of moment playing any sort of character, but... this thread kind of got me thinking, I always make the 'funny guy' character, or some variation of it; be it a funny asshole, an absurdist insane guy, or the comically-in-over-his-head person, i always make characters to try and get other people to laugh. I don't think I've ever made a "serious" character before. Well, I did once, but I hated that character.

Does that mean anything? I know I'm a funny person - I've been told as much by a lot of different people - but the fact that I only enjoy playing funny characters seems strange.

You just like to make people laugh, user, and that's a good thing to like. That's all you need to worry about.

Every character I make turns out to be a dork

This is exactly what I thought I was in for when I first had the character idea. Somewhere down the road I made him too much about his weaknesses; flaws are good to emphasize, but what probably happened after the starting point of "big lost idiot" was that my mind filled in a bunch of too-familiar associations with it.

I probably just shouldn't be playing that kind of character, considering. I chose to do so because I was trying new things, not because it was fun, and it turned out not to be a new thing anyway.

I don't feel like I suffer enough or help others as much as I should, so I usually make PCs who have some deep melancholy that pushes them to help others at their own expense. I also drift toward depressing video games that induce the feelings I think I deserve.

As I've grown up, I also try to play the nicest do-gooders I can manage. I think it's because I've had my fill of gritty edgelords, and I started loving the concept of pure unadulterated heroism. You know, guys like superman or rouroni kenshin, who always strive for the greatest goodness and never let anyone die because they're the goddamn heroes and that's what they do. My more recent characters rush to the rescue of people they don't know and try to spare lives whenever possible.

I'm a pretty smart guy IRL but I like playing guys with lower education but more practical knowledge. I think it's because I see my father (a dyslexic yet very smart handyman who grew up poor and couldn't afford college) as someone to be emulated. Also I make a bunch of mistakes during roleplaying, and having an imperfect character is a great way to cover for that.

Doesn't necessarily mean anything. I do the same and I think it's because I'm always trying to avoid seriously dealing with my (or any) problems, but that doesn't mean that's true for you.

Are you the sort of person who basically can't stop making jokes? It's a weird distinction, I know, but if that's the case it's a coping mechanism. Developed for any number of reasons.

Not anymore.

I usually play masked heroes of some sort and I'm not sure if it's because I never had a role model to aspire to as a child or if it's because I don't believe the heroes I play could ever actually exist, and in either case the heroes are masked and faceless because they aren't a person, but what I think an ideal hero should be. That is, uncompromising and deeply or copiously flawed in ways they refuse to accept is a flaw or justify because of their uncompromising nature.

Either that, or the small exotic race party mascot, which I usually enjoy playing the most.

Back when I was playing an unnamed MMO, I had a relatively new guildmate remark on the fact that my character had an extremely mean look about his face. I zoomed in to see what he meant, as I don't think I'd looked at that since I'd made the character (which was done when I had a much worse computer and thus could barely see what texture I chose during chargen), and another long time officer said over ventrilo "yeah, user, your guy looks like almost as much of an asshole as you are."

This made me realize how much of a jerk I could be during raids, so I stayed off the mic a lot after that. Only really got back to speaking frequently when I discovered that you can be much more helpful by nudging people along and giving them hints, celebrating success, and being generous or gracious as the situation warrants.

I do tend to be joking a lot more than I tend to be serious. I can get serious, but jokes tend to be a lot easier.

I do suffer depression - got it diagnosed by a doctor, not a tumblr self-diagnosis - so I might do it just to get that positive feeling you get when people laugh at what you say, even if it's only for a brief few moments.

>Make character intended to be "cautious"
>Play character as having major trust issues after a betrayal that are verified in game when half of all NPCs are demons, hags, monsters, or just plain old humans that are dicks
>Play different character
>Haha user you aren't playing X, you don't need to be so paranoid
>It's not the character that can never trust others, it's me
le schizoid face

>want to play a dumb bruiser in an ETU game
>he is a delusional conspiracy theorist
>have more fun with him than almost any other character ive ever played, he has tons of personality and sway with npc's even without a single social skill

Kinda the same. I always try to avoid sexy villainesses since I got a thing for em.

Problem is I usually play the party face since I'm good at talking and improv.

And then we had a hot vampire stalking the party that was interested in my high charisma ass.

That shit got awkward real fast. I wonder if I got magical realmed.

>Always get stuck being party leader because no one else is a good enough strategist or no one else has the balls to get shit moving for the sake of the game
>Try to make stoic, reserved characters, who let other, more knowledgeable people make the decisions
>Try to make brutish, irreverent characters, who don't care about what decisions are made, and so let other people make those decisions
>Try to play completely aloof, ridiculous, preoccupied, scatter-brained characters who should not be trusted with holding a map, let alone concocting overarching plans

>Everyone continues to look at me dumbfounded until eventually my brute has to break character to explain who the real murderer obviously must be
>My stoic foreigner still has to break theme to try to prevent people from taking horrific, life-threatening risks because they simply don't believe the odds are that stacked against them
>My ridiculous, underaged, xenophobic, squeaky-voiced geek is forced to venture blindly into enemy territory because if I don't go, no one else will make a fucking decision

Maybe it says more about my friend group than it does about me?
Maybe I should just always stick the 'mastermind' archetype or the 'surprisingly wise foreigner' shit because that's what always happens to me anyway?

>Make short spunky tomboy swashbuckler girl with a short temper and even shorter hair
>Realize I just made a character who more or less represents my ideal girlfriend mid-session
>Play her till she gets killed anyway because she was built really well and fun to roleplay
I'm still not sure if anyone noticed or not, she was actually a fairly popular character with the rest of the group too just because of the hilarity of situations she would get into.

>Running campaign
>Majority of NPCs that contribute are female
>Usually strong, assertive and domineering. No nonsense shopkeeper, whip wielding bandit queen, sorceress who has subjugatiled all local orcs, goblins and gangs for her own altruistic ends
>Most male characters are comic relief, useless, or wounded

If I was alive in the 30s I'd have probably beaten Marston to creating Wonder Woman.

>"Your characters are all paranoid wrecks, you might have trust issues user."
>What? No, no, I trust. I don't even question it.
>"What do you trust, though?"
>That people will hurt me.

>oh.

>always have been playing female PCs
>one time I don't and have zero interest in the game
>find myself spending a lot of time coming up with how she looks, how shes dressed, and picking out all the right clothes to look perfect, even if its all just in the mind
>go into all these insane details every time that don't matter but flesh out my PC's life
>I'm a guy

I think I might actually want to be a woman. Or maybe I should have just gone into fashion. HELP

All of my characters are really weird. Exotic or custom races or sometimes even monsters, weird or custom classes, all of that. I figured out that it represents how I never feel like I fit in, and how I don't think I'll ever be accepted by anyone.

Well, if you want to go into fashion a career change isn't impossible. A sex change, however, especially as an adult, is hard as fuck.

I don't even know where I would start. I'm not going back to school, fuck that bullshit.

I wouldn't do a sex change unless it was 100% perfect, but that will never happen in my life time.

When I say exotic races, I mean shit like an awakened gelatinous cube sorcerer with a clockwork toucan familiar. Weird shit.

I don't know either, I'd ask Veeky Forums.

It wasn't one character, it was a series of characters. Over the course of years and several games it eventually became really obvious that the one thing all my characters had in common was that they all had SEVERE issues with authority. Its one of the things that made me realize how deep set my own issues with any sort of authority were and how much my instinctive 'FUCK YOU' to anyone giving me something I perceived as an order was the major source of both my troubles with work, family, and school. It actually helped me realize just how hard I self sabotaged my own education because all the authority figured in my life were pushing me to excel due to my absurdly high childhood I.Q. (Inb4 someone calls me out for 'bragging'. Took another test a few years ago and I've dropped off significantly, still above average, but not amazingly.)

Pretty much every character iv ever made has been extremely reserved and a "man of few but important words", normaly tactical and hesitant to enter combat no matter the class. my characters normally dont get along to well with party member, at most tolerating them. And my morals are either at one extreme of " the ends justify the means" or the extreme other end at "the means are unthinkable, no matter the ends"

I dont know if this says something about me or if im just shit at roleplaying. It dosnt help that 3 of the 5 other people i play with are usualy all competing to be comic relief characters .

>recently develop struggle with playing a character that kills other sentient creatures
>used to play characters that used knives and guns, now I lean towards fists and blunt weapons, often at the expense of combat potential
Its difficult for me to play a character that can't at least explore qualms about killing people. Self-defense I get, but killing for gain is hard for me to justify now. I want to like the characters I play as.

>have friend in a gaming group
>only one who plays female characters
>sews, super into fashion and fabric, does theatre and loves old musicals
>he's super religious
I'm really scared that he's gay and deep in the closet because his family would kick him out. I can't imagine bottling shit up like that for so long.

Ask if he's gay

[s] and love him anyway [/s]

Offer to make him your gf.

>tfw pacifist irl
>tfw want to play Paladin who always strives to find a non-violent solution and protects his allies in combat
>tfw want to play a real hero, defender of truth, justice, beauty and shit
>tfw party is almost always murderhobos who disintegrate people with blunt force trauma or magic to solve literally every problem

I always play flashy, witty sorcerers or bards who are always the first to point out their own capabilities relevant to the situation. They also tend to sleep with anything that moves. The only times I didn't play that was when I made a cute necromancer elf wizard girl who would feed peoples' loved ones to her ghouls right in front of them because she didn't "get" morality. She was pretty fun.

Then I had a fighter who I absolutely hated. He was just kind of... there? There was little more to him than "I attack." or rarely, "I push him off a cliff."

>tfw you are an attention-craving manwhore who enjoys watching people suffer.

>Always play characters who take on too much responsibility and leadership
>And assume the rest of the party and cast will keep up
>Always end up getting disappointed or annoyed by their failures, so I end up piling more work on my shoulders

I realized it after like, the 4th game in a row where I was doing it, this can't be healthy.

>play Int 20 Wizard with high Cha
>solve every conundrum the party encounters with my near infinite wits
>realize I'm a charismatic genius and the apex of human creation

[Insert smug anime girl]

I've found the central arcs of most of my characters unintentionally mirror some issue I'm struggling with in my own life.

Exiled prince to a deadbeat King who's cruel japery and pride terrorize the very countryman he is supposed to be guiding.

Naive follower of an Aboleth that wishes to depose the indifferent, capricious, and often tyrannical false island gods and institute a unified, ordered, and pristine utopia across the archipelago that worships him and his "benevolent" rule, mostly because it's hard to cause suffering to your fellow man when you're all mindless drones.

A gifted young cybersnoop who nevertheless can't seem to escape the shadow and legacy of those around him more talented.

A dropout geomancer who wishes to prove his grand visions for the craft are not unfounded; that it has much more potential than just building city infrastructure. Especially so he can rub it in the face of those who looked down their nose and told him that it, that he, couldn't.

A psychic so fraught with anxiety and fear that he rent all traces of the emotion out of his body, where it now serves him as a ghoulish spirit, but leaving him soulless and without inhibitions.

>I don't know what Veeky Forums is
>Thinking it stands for /faggots/
>Check in the board list, now I feel like I should apologize

Works fine until you run into something that requires the other 4 stats.

There's a reason Stark has 5 other members on his team.

You know, you don't have to be gay to not be "Grr, lift weights, hit on women, drink beer, sportsball"

If women get to be tomboys without automatically being lesbians, then guys should be allowed the same treatment, it's only fair.

>needing the other 4 stats
>when spells are a thing

I've had a player build and play sentient Mountain Dew.

Wizards don't get healing spells, so I hope you at least put some points into Con.

If anything I would have said Charisma is one of the odd men out because that's what suggestion, charm, and confuse are for.

That's dumb. You're dumb.

Not sure if it is dm or me but all my male characters die, all my female characters are powerful female tops. Half orc with reverse rape parents, cloberella want snu snu barbarian, dominatrix of calestria. I'm a guy but I fall into the female role of seduction and cruel sadism really easy

I feel you user. Also diagnosed with depression. In most social gatherings I tend to act like a fool because I feel like a burden to other with my depressing self. The problem is that lately I start to do it unconsciously and I actually hate playing the fool and feel like I'm losing control when I do. There's also the problem if I'm actually annoying while being a fool.

Feel this hard, and it's usually exacerbated because both of my DMs and/or parties seem to take a load of utterly ridiculous shit on the chin. As a result, I usually also do most of the talking. I'm working at it, since one of the DMs is much newer. Unlike the other, he's making more strides to see those hiccups coming and improve, instead of having an I-know-best attitude.
Because of that, as an exercise, my next character will be a talker, but also endlessly patient and serves without complaint.

but it does stand for Veeky Forumsggots

>All of my characters are either my fetish or esentially me
>despite all being randomly gened or rolled down to details like height
HELP

>Took another test a few years ago and I've dropped off significantly, still above average, but not amazingly.
Same.

It's a lot easier to score super high as a kid because it's compared to other people your age. 90th percentile of 7-yr-olds isn't nearly as objectively far ahead as 90th percentile of all 30-yr-olds. There may technically be just as many people lower than you, but the overall distance is far less. Bell curves can be tricky like that.

I'm gonna say strong Law orientation. Other than that not much.

Fuck off
The narrative that homeless people only buy drugs with their donations, and/or are homeless because of them is absolute horseshit. It's rarely some middle class office worker who dabbled in meth and got hooked. It's people who have been economically vulnerable all their lives and have been fucked over because profit is prioritized over human life. And even if they were gonna buy drugs , who the fuck cares? It's a coping mechanism. Honestly it sounds like you just want to feel good about yourself rather than helping people. They are infinitely more knowledgeable about what they need than you do so if you're gonna give them anything give them money.

wtf are you me?

you either need fewer fetishes, or to stop being a changeling.

Being attracted to everything but/including yourself must be a pain.

Personally, I just ask them what they need then go buy it for them, or point them to somewhere where people will give it to them.
Solves the problem directly, and you can't buy drugs with a meal/gas/etc.

I don't really understand how you think granola and key clips are gonna help anything, though.

I know this feeling.

I became a DM.

I feel like those characters but in real life.

>Play a Barbarian once who was not very well built, but distinguished himself near the end of the game by basically sacrificing himself so the party can escape.
>Play a Bard who performs much better and midway through the game ends up sacrificing himself so the party can win a fight.
>Play a Paladin who kills a dragon the party decided to flee from by stalling it and getting lucky rolls, sacrificing himself so that the party can escape
>"Jeez user, your characters always commit suicide."
>"What? No, they just die because I suck at making characters."
>"No dude, several times you actually throw your character's life away heroically when there are other options to take."
>"Yeah, but the party got off better with me gone and the character dead, right?"
>"That doesn't make sense dude, the party can recover from damage and resource loss eventually even if shit goes south."

And that was how I discovered I have not only cared more about the happiness of everyone around me more then my own but that my sense of individual self worth is so low that I fairly recurrent desire to kill myself that might be pretty severe.

I don't think anyone else in my life has figured it out yet, and I'm only really telling you guys because I know that there's no consequences to me telling you and if something happens to me or I do something people could excuse themselves of guilt because there were genuinely no signs.

>who the fuck cares?

Not the same guy, but in general when you give a homeless person money you want them to use it for the right reasons. Such as trying to get out of their situation or using it to buy food they need. Not to buy drugs that will likely put them further in the hole.

....that's seriously fucked up man.

>Every character I made sleeps with tavern wenches because I'll never fulfill my biological drive of impregnating a woman

Ayyyyeee I see what you did there with the futurerama jokes

In my town I've seen some homeless people, they usually stay under a bridge or at a buss top with a cart full of stuff and they tend to bother no-one.
Then you have the ones sitting in corners with papers cups waiting for people to give them money. Those are usually some poor fucks who are being used by assholes who take all the money for themselves.
Then you got the ones who go around asking for money, to get food or buy a ticket for the bus and they usually already look like drug addicts.
Yeah, I don't give money to people anymore.
A shame really, I don't mind giving some, but I don't want it to go to waste, or it going into the wrong pockets.

Sounds like you're trying to hard to be different. You're already playing D&D, there's no shame in playing a 3d6 down the line human fighter. Using wacky races or shenanigans as a crutch is fun sometimes, but gets old fast.
this is probably why you feel like you'll "never fit in", because weird people are flaky and awkward and try too hard to be weird, and nobody wants to deal with that shit after high school

Maybe you're just lazy

Homeless people who are hobos for more than a year are normally homeless because they like drugs/booze more than working/having a family/sleeping indoors. Or they're not actually homeless, just fake it for gibs.
In my personal experience, lady hobos are 100 times more likely to be fuckin' evil than male hobos, because the resources for homeless women are a ton better, so if a lady's been on the street for a while, she's fucking vicious.

Carabiners are a nice idea, super useful and cheap. I used to make a couple baloney sandwiches and take 'em to work.

t. ex EMS worker

Why are there so many pussies on Veeky Forums?
No offense, this is the loveliest board and I'm sure we have a higher good guy percentage than most boards, but the amount of walking vaginas and subfags is enormous.

t. Chad

Holy shit the next character I make is gonna be Alex Jones

>this is the loveliest board
AHAHAAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHGAGHAHAGAHGAHHAAHHAHAH

Just summon a unicorn or an angel and make it do your healing for you. Or get that domain dabbling ability, whatever it's called.

You do realize that you could tell them the solution out of character so that the player with the intelligent character can continue the roleplay without you breaking character. Right?

I think my group saw my sadistic and man-hating part when I played a barbarian who loved to hurt enemies he had subdued with very painful torture. Gouging out eyes, cutting off toes one by one, pulling out teeth and stabbing them with hot pockers before drowning them in shallow pools of water.

It really is though.

Probably something to do with the social conditions that produce casual misogynists like yourself also being harsh and emotionally damaging to less aggressive, self righteous people.

>casual mysogynists
>hurr durr you realize that women and men are different and supervise differences as casual insults therefore you hate women
I bet you think everything you disagree with I'd fascism you snowflake pussy

>phoneposting

>implying it isn't

i would recommend you ask someone about their honest opinion of you.

>Always make evil sleazeball type characters
>somehow always end up as the team mom
I'm not sure what this is supposed to mean, but it always fucking happens

You're a softy trying to be hardcore while surrounded by manchildren you feel the need to take care of.
Do you have younger siblings?

I found out I like dicks. Thanks, game.