After browsing and reading stories for years I finally decided to overcome my social phobia and join a tabletop game

After browsing and reading stories for years I finally decided to overcome my social phobia and join a tabletop game.

How do I avoid being "that guy" and outing myself as a moron (which I am)?

'That Guy' is purely a matter of taking actions that go against the fun of the group.

Try not to make assumptions, don't be afraid to ask questions, get along with the people you're playing with but, mostly importantly, just try to relax and have fun. I'm sure you'll do okay.

Yeah, just ask yourself - is what I'm about to do going to be detrimental to other people's enjoyment of the game?

If your actions would lead you to answer "yes", do something else. Make sure to actually do something else, to help keep out of the frame of mind of "it's either I do this thing or I do nothing". If you begin looking at the game in those sort of terms, you'll inevitably have a pretty bad time of it.

>browsing and reading stories for years
>how do I avoid being "that guy"
>outing myself as a moron (which I am)
>social phobia

It sounds more like you need to further your own personal development than about whether you need to worry about looking like an idiot because you're new to tabletop gaming, which is a problem that I really don't believe asking strangers on the internet would help.

Be polite.

That's all it takes to be a decent person: manners.

I'd call that a bare minimum for social interaction, and I don't think anyone should aim for minimum.

Don't try to game the system, proving yourself and becoming someone awesome or whatever. Have fun and make sure others have fun too - are appreciated when they deserve it, that you indulge it when it's fun for all of yoou (don't indulge them when they are being That Guy and about to use you for their own power trip).

It's what it takes to be a likeable person. All the rest is just "be yourself." Be that, but a more polite version of it.

And then you're good company.

That's not what it takes to be a likeable person, that's just what it takes to be a tolerable person. You can't actually give advice on how to be likeable.

I like anyone who can be polite. Maybe you're just a dick.

Make sure to always involve yourself in everything, it lets people get to know you faster. Never admit you're wrong about anything, so you don't make it seem like you lack the confidence to be there, and always make sure to call out anything unreasonable, so they know you aren't an idiot.

This is bad advice, proving yourself shows that you have a reason to be there. It makes the group harder to easily envision without you, which is vital.

In case of not-confident person, starting out and worried already about his image, I still stand by this advice. If you aren't already comfortable, if you don't know what to do and have a proper balance of self-confidence and respect for others, you proving yourself may be infused with touch of desperation and that will lead to you acting like a total sperglord or becoming That Guy because you will look for opportunities to shine and sometimes take it at the price of enjoyment for all.

So, I'd first acquire a balance and get used to sessions and then play around with expression of yourself. Need to walk before you can run etc.
Especially since a decent player, doing his best without going on egotrips and whatnot will prove himself merely to be a decent companion to play with - but that's already above average in most circles.

It's a troll or a very naive advice for someone who's already a balanced, self-confident person able to aprroach things in a mature manner - anyone who lacks these traits by going that route will just become that guy:
>Make sure to always involve yourself in everything
Butt in into everything, no matter if you know what's going on or are welcome

>Never admit you're wrong about anything, so you don't make it seem like you lack the confidence to be there
Be an ass full of yourself, even if it's clear you're wrong but you lack honesty and humility to admit it.

>and always make sure to call out anything unreasonable, so they know you aren't an idiot
Make sure you're right, everyone is an idiot so you can go out of your way to make sure they know that too. Nitpick, correct, show them your superiority.

I know (hope) it's not what you meant but that's what it would come to (despite potentially one's good intentions) if someone will just attempt such attitude without having properly developed approach toward the group and certain balance.

You're bullying me aren't you?

Worst case you accidentally upset someone and then apologize, you don't want to hurt people and probably won't become a defensive ass if you do on accident so you're good

What gives you that impression? I'm genuinely confused.

I also have such impression, pretty much explained in
Pushing someone into cnfident, involving, dominating attitude when they're already worried and nervus about the very prospect of interacting with people at all is asking for them to fuck up. Let the guy develop some sensibilities before you'll expect him to show charisma.

It is better to stay silent and be thought a fool, then to open your mouth and remove all doubt.

That's the basic rule of thumb to keep in mind. A fair number of gamers will be patient with you if you don't know what you're doing and hold your hand, but they WILL expect you to pick up on basic rules. To that end, get a copy of the core rules at least and read that shit. Several times.

That's general advice. Now specifically, there are three That Guy archetypes. I'll go over them specifically so you know some things to avoid doing

First up is the dude that just assumes everyone at the table has turned on a PvP flag. They aproach every game like it's a shitty LARP and assume everyone else is out to fuck them over in some way. Many times these faggots screw the party by running off alone and doing something stupid that gets the whole party in trouble. Sometimes, they really are just morons who don't realize the game world wont fall in line just because they are PC's.

That brings us to our next archetype, wrong genre savy. You all get togother for a sword & sorcery (Conan) game and this dipshit starts acting like he's a god damn Shinigami from Bleach. Depending of the kindness levels of ST your PARTY may have some small level of protagonist power, but no one person in said party should, and you definitely shouldn't have a Goku teir MC.


Lastly is Moral Crusader. The Lawful Stupid Paladin is an example of this, but it runs much deeper. I'm talking about people that use games as a vehicle so they can go on and on about how their IRL morals are the best and everyone else is just dumb. When the party ignores the Lich, the fedora tipping atheist who dosen't believe in gods despite the concrete existence of Clerics, and such. Unless something like that is the clearly stated meta plot of the whole game, leave it at the door.

No, really. I'm serious. Read it.

I'd add to that user, there's a few more types of That Guys, or at least bad players:

- Lolsorandom, "it's just a game, chill" guys. Treat the game as a way to enjoy themselves at the cost of everyone else, disregarding mood and intention fo the group. Sometimes oblivious and stupid, sometimes malicious and selfish, sometimes just completely clueless and wanting to create certain personal image too hard and without sufficient skill.

- Elitist pricks. They are surely the best here, they know the best, they've made their characters the best and play it in the coolest way (just like in their anime!). They're not merely assertive, they're "my way or the highway" and willing to put down or coplain about any voices of dissent. Mary Sues on power trip or just assholes on an ego trip, trying to use the session as a stage to bedazzle others with their superiority or at least indulge their contempt and bitterness toward others. May sometimes double as user's Moral Crusaders.

Rule of the thumb is to remember to roleplay character not just yourself and if you cannto do that, to at least make it engaging and fun for others to play with. Remember it's not just you that the game is for - you all, your whole party is the main characters of the story and all of you deserve and should have similar number of opportunities for the limelight. You're a team.

>Remove all aspects of anime and shit like you have in your pic from your outward appearance, keep it private
>Put in maximum effort, if the GM says game is on Saturday, turn your character in on Thursday at the latest
>Don't ask for shit, ask what books are being used and work out of them.
>Ask questions before the day of the session
>Read the god damn rule book
>Don't speak over somebody who is talking
>Make characters that fit the game, not unique snowflakes unless the GM encourage it.

If you are unable to follow these, you are 'That Guy' in my eyes.

Be cooperative.
That doesn't mean bend over for everything, but work with the others in the group, even if it sometimes means being a bit uncomfortable.

I was in your place last year. Joined a game with some people who seemed cool. Haven't had a single problem, and I've been having a blast ever since.

Just find a group of people who share your interests. Be cool, be polite, be yourself, and you'll be fine.

Maybe let people know your new, so that they'll know to give you a bit of a break if you're slow on the uptake for a few things.

People won't fault you from learning from your mistakes, should you make them. Well, reasonable people at least. I mean, everybody is new at some point.

Communicate if you're confused about rules or whatever. If you're having problems with anything related to the game, communication is the best way to solve it.

TTRPGs are a cooperative experience, so keep that in mind. Everyone, including the GM, is there to have fun.