Claim your waifus Veeky Forums

Claim your waifus Veeky Forums

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What a worthwhile thread we should all definitely participate in.

I'll go first: my waifu is a

sage

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I claim all of everyone else's waifus.

Best girl, coming through

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Good taste here, but best lawmage coming through.

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Excellent taste OP

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I guess I'll claim Oketra, second best Amonkhet God.

shit taste all of you

My waifu can beat up your waifu

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I find this picture kind of hilarious considering that now that we actually have some grasp on their personalities they should be in the opposite clothes.

She will live forever within my heart. Best goddess

Close second, but I just want to be cuddled by a qt with big soft wings, and Sigarda is by far the most mortal-accessible angel in MTG.

Do you like Mexicans?

I know Hazoret was originally the motherly Goddess Pre-Bolas, but what about Oketra?

Oketra is as far as I can tell a war-goddess, or maybe a civic goddess. She shoots things with arrows, and teaches people solidarity and teamwork. Think stern but loving teacher/drill instructor who wants you to succeed, but isn't afraid to make the journey hard as hell.

I think the point of all the Amonkhet gods, except Bontu was that they were motherly/fatherly. If anything though, Oketra was the most motherly of them all.

If I read it correctly, the only thing that Bolas even changed in any of them is that he rewired them to love him unconditionally, and told them lies about the trials and the fate of humanity

Nope, Hazoret is supermom. Even now, post bolas, her pre-trial training is literally just hanging out with the initiates, getting to know them, being supportive and listening to their problems, and making sure they're ready for the final trial. She doesn't even use her throne, she just sits down with the rest of the kids on some pillows. She even asks for little trinkets from them sometimes, so she can remember them and the fond memories they shared after the trial.

Of course, she's also the last line of defense against monsters in the city. If something big breaks in, Momma Hazoret goes in for the kill.

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Already claimed by try again.

>Nope, Hazoret is supermom.
My point is that all of them are supermoms and superdads, just in different color-aligned ways.
Oketra barely sits on her throne too, she just walks around the city, answering prayers and comforting children
Rhonas watches his devotees train and teaches them, and when the insect gods awoke, his only thought was protecting the people of Amonkhet. He also hunts and kills anything that threatens the city, just like Hazoret.
Bontu is the only non-motherly shitter of the bunch

According to the artbook Rhonas actually fucks off into the desert to go headbutt zombies to death pretty often. He's still a great dad figure though.
Kefnet's not very parental, but he's also kind of a dick if you aren't smart, and has absurdly high standards for everything. If you fuck up once with him, you're delegated to getting taught by other people forever unless you manage to do some crazy shit.

Bontu on the other hand is kind of hilarious. She's a complete shitter, but manages to do it in such a charming way that I have a hard time staying mad at her. Still, Bontus Last Reckoning is almost entirely just her yelling "BOLAS-SENPAIIIIIII~" so it's pretty damn great.

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It occurred to me recently that the only way Wizards could think to express "this is a really bad situation" was by literally murdering a bunch of lovable animals. Just the hackiest possible hackery.

Why didn't Bolas impregnate Bontu to have God crocodile dragon babies?

It's kind of hard for me to believe that a goddess of ambition would just bow her head and let a dragon trespasser do what he will with her plane. She should have been the most indignant of the bunch.
Nicky B subscribes to the philosophy of "I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one"

>implying he didn't hit that

Because Bolas is a criminal waster of talent, and is such a monomaniac that I'm pretty sure the only thing he finds attractive is himself in a mirror.

I mean hell Bolas, first Rakka Mar and now Bontu? It's like you don't understand the best part of being a supervillain is the scantily clad henchmen.

She didn't bow her head, she took one look at the odds when Bolas straight up noped a Wrath of God arrow from Oketra and decided who the winning team was then and there. Also, the brainwashing.

What if Glorybringer is the child of Bolas and Bontu?

>Armor on the side that faces backwards in a shooting stance
Consider me triggered.

Maybe she's a lefty.

It's kind of implied she didn't get brainwashed, since she was the only one who remembered Bolas' name and since she was given the task of, and I quote, "[maintaining] the threads [Bolas] wove into the fabric of [her] siblings."

Claiming it boiii.

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Most shooters will hold a long gun in their shooting hand even if it's not shouldered. Also, if she slings the gun across the staff on her back (to be unslung lefty), she wouldn't be able to unsling the staff.

torture me :3

My moon runes aren't that good. Is this the equivalent of "Thalia is cute! CUTE!"

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It's either that or bullying.
Possibly both.

You win waifu war.

Thalia Chan is Mini Skirt Black Tights Cute.

>you will never bully Thalia

why live

Hour of Devastation grade autism. Different interpretations can exist for roles you're forcing on fictional characters

Reading this shit from the artbook. The whole buildup to the Trial of Fervor is relaxed and joyous compared to the others, and they go into detail about Hazoret's relationship with her initiates.

That said, you are correct they can be interpreted differently, I'm just running with what the artbook says combined with my own ideas from the story articles/set.

*grabs*

She's not dead yet. She's gonna live, right? Right?

She lives.
Bolas eventually fucks off after bitchslapping the Jacetice League

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FUCK.
Good one.

read that as the plows flame

why do nips love making joan of arc into a magical anime girl?

FUCK! Gotta get here sooner.

At least no one claimed Tasha yet...

they think too highly of France

Thank Bolas Oketra DIED with SHIT ON HER FACE

Because Jeanne D'arc is top tier, user.

Because it's a famous person / knight (I know she isn't but japs...) that's symbolic of a nation and unlike King Arthur they don't even have to gender swap her.

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This nigga

fuck you, i have a complete foiled playset, not many people are that autistic

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lucky you, she's the only survivor

Game may be dead, but she's not to me.

Claimed

I'm still irrationally pissed at the ending to the Theros block.

>dat unknowable horror all over your dick

You and me both, user.

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>God crocodile dragon babies
would pay to see that

>picture of her shedding
l-lewd

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I know she's a meme, both on here and /a/, but I can't help myself. She's just the best.

implying you wouldn't

We'll bang, ok?

I see some others looking for the ahem serpent persuasion.

And a corset to give her snekhips and snektits, which she is somehow wearing while shedding. That picture is pure, cask-strength magical realm.

Girls with wings do me good things.

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Cyrene

Winning so early...
Moonfolk all the way for me though

>tfw never going to get to travel cross-country with her in a 7TP

Feels awful...

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I miss Kamigawa, but I really don't want the current creative team anywhere near it.

Bontu is the strongest of the gods though.
Hazoret got destroyed in that fight with Bontu's necro magic and sticky goo.

You fools. 100 posts in and best Veeky Forums waifu still unclaimed

I much prefer the Titans before they got all their abilities retconned.

DON'T BULLY MARIA-CHAN

Exactly.

People, if you love Kamigawa, you don't want a Return block.

a full foiled playset of Oketra costs around $20.

I'm actually really sad that they're going back to Dominaria now. All the mystery and ambiguity and weirdness replaced by...realistically, probably Phyrexians?