That Guy/Horror Stories Thread

The other thread hit its bump limit and was largely off topic.

>Want to GM again because it's been a while.
>Offer to do it for some guys at work. One seemed normal and had never played before, the other two were "experienced gamers"
>They're both really into stereotypically nerdy things.
>The two gamers are roommates, they offer to host.
>Other guy brings his wife.
>We walk inside and it's exactly what you imagine a sad nerd den to be.
>Garbage everywhere, empty gundam boxes, replica swords, gaming chairs in the livingroom.
>There's no dining room table, the dining room is just filled with boxes of gaming merchandise.
>They were the types to buy SUPER SPECIAL BOXED EDITIONS of games that came with tons of plastic garbage, which wasn't just confined to the dining room.
>We have to sit on the floor/couch because they don't have a table. They can afford hundreds of dollars in merchandise but can't be bothered to get a table from a garage sale or something.
>The third roommate (not present) was an alcoholic, there were just empty bottles wedged in the sofa.
>Oh boy
>Game starts
>One of the roommates starts talking about a PC from a previous campaign, and how he integrated her into his campaign and made her a god.
>Oh no
>Whenever normal guy or his wife didn't understand a rule, they'd roll their eyes.
>Despite all their hyped up stories about their previous characters shenanigans, they barely roleplayed or took initiative.
>Normal guy and his wife are doing alright.
>The other two are playing it like a game outright.
>Meme jokes, gamer jokes.
>One of them scratches his ass, then smells his fingers. He does this multiple times and normal guys wife notices.
>Normal guy starts taking charge and being the face of the party, his wife is basically face #2.
>Suddenly they care, and interject every time he speaks up.

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=6Vsv_vC7keA&feature=youtu.be
giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?95189-New-Worst-Session-How-Lanky-got-hisself-stabbed!
twitter.com/SFWRedditImages

>They don't offer alternatives, or even roleplay their characters offering alternatives. They just want normal guy to know he's dumb and not a real nerd.
>Their "girlfriend" arrives.
>They are both fucking her while she lives there rent free.
>The last place she lived, she did the same thing, and it ended in a quagmire of drama. Despite the mountain of evidence that this girl is manipulative and nuts, they are both convinced it will work this time.
>I suspect that she's legitimately mentally ill, some mix of bipolar and narcissistic.
>She wants attention from them in the middle of the game.
>Basically sits in the middle of the group and puffs her chest out while making baby talk. It's the least subtle attempt at seduction I've ever seen.
>They want to finish the game.
>She gets mad and storms off.
>We finish the session.
>I try to give them the benefit of the doubt. I didn't want to run another game, but I didn't rebuff them entirely. We were in the military, and I didn't want to sour a working relationship over tabletop games.
>A few weeks, I'm back at their place with some other people from work for a party.
>Come to find out the girl is also banging the alcoholic.
>The alcoholic breaks down and cries during the middle of the party about his divorce.
>One random guy is not buying crazy girls pleas for attention so she slaps him.
>While talking to a married woman he tells her how nice her blouse is and basically starts playing with the fabric near her breasts.
>Everyone sees this and tells him to fuck off.
>"Oh, so everyone is ganging up on me huh?"
>He threw a fit, locked us outside, and spent the rest of the night sharpening knives in the dark while sobbing.

I stopped hanging out with them. Last time I heard anything the alcoholic guy was getting divorced from the bipolar girl.
.

Most of my bad sessions are just run of the mill murderhobo gameplay, nothing crazy. Has anyone here had a game get physical?

I live out in the middle of the rural us. the closest group of people to me are a bunch of normies.
We meet for anywhere between 2 to 6 hours by the gameplay will only end up taking about 1/4 of that MAX. DM rarely prepares.

Players
>Edge Lord - usually plays a sorcerer or wizard Standard murderhobo who gets uncomfortable if he cant just kill things in any given situation. If there is an option to kill someone he will do it. Will never play standard races.

>Captain Obvious - Extreme murder hobo; wants to just walk up and murder things. It's not the fact he doesn't want to roleplay but, he role plays as someone who has no filter. Sometimes he enjoys going directly against the plot and ignoring any and all plothooks. If there is a rumor of a bandit uprising in the east, he'll insist we go west. If there are rumors of undead rising in the north we go south.
Combine this with the fact his character will openly announce our plans to our foes and any attempt at stealth or subterfuge is near impossible with him around. Try to sneak? he'll tell the enemy about how they're going to get stabbed or shot by the rogue. Try to lie your way out of a situation? he'll attempt to reveal you.

>The only two players aren't worth mentioning

One ending to a campaign went as such
>Go to village to meet the rogue's thieves guild associates.
>By the time we get to the village, they've been caught. The captain of the guards is staging a public execution within an hour. he intends on making examples of out them.
>As they're being marched up to the platform to be hung, we try making a plan to set them free. I'm a bard so I try to make a distraction, to get the attention of the now growing crowd as well as the guards while the rogue sneaks around and sets them free.
>Edge lord mage wants to set fire to a few houses to get their attention
>Captain Obvious announces our plans out loud to everyone, in front of the crowd and several guards. He wants to fight them.
Guess how it ended?

>Combine this with the fact his character will openly announce our plans to our foes and any attempt at stealth or subterfuge is near impossible with him around. Try to sneak? he'll tell the enemy about how they're going to get stabbed or shot by the rogue. Try to lie your way out of a situation? he'll attempt to reveal you

Your DM should be putting a stop to this.

youtube.com/watch?v=6Vsv_vC7keA&feature=youtu.be

>Storytelling VtM campaign
>That Guy makes his character an intelligent and charismatic Toreador
>talk to random NPC
>"I get my gun out and threaten him!"
>"O-okay?"
>"Yeah, I smack him in the head!"
>another player, who's playing ex-mobster Nosferatu asks him why
>"He's a dirty capitalist pig."
>what
>every encounter looks like this
>Toreador tries to beat everyone to death, other players try to get him out of fights and end up talking with people
>few sessions later
>they meet 8th gen vampire, high position in Camarilla
>"I punch him in the balls!"
>"What the fuck, man?" "Shut the fuck up!"
>Finally he stops
>a session later I made him to sweet talk a girl
>"Bitch, let me pass!"
>"You CAN'T do that"
>"Why the hell not?"
>"You're a freaking Toreador, now use your fucking speech!"
>"Alright!"
>"Ooh, girl, you wanna bang?"
>"It doesn't work. Try harder."
>"How?!"
>"Just say what you would say"
>"I don't know how"
>"Then why the fuck did you choose a Toreador?"
>"They are hot and everyone likes them"
>whatdididotodeservethis.gif

God, they're fat.

So you killed him, right?

seriously someone like this would just be dead in the default setting

make an example out of him

Not yet. I'm plotting with other players about how and when I should kill him, I need something grand. I just hope he doesn't screw up the other players by breaking the masquerade or something.

I meant IRL.

Here it is:


>Party is teifling alchemist, Orc bezerker, a naga rogue, a cleric and me, a Paladin
>So they walk down the stairs, and the lobby is right around the corner
>Rogue hears something
>someone creeping up the stairs behind them
>giant cultist cube out for our souls
>Run from the murder cube
>Nobody says shit about the cleric
>He also didn't get the hint
>Rogue just shrugs at me
>DM gives me a weird look
>NEar total party wipe, due to bad rolls. My Paladin is only one left, and on low health.
>Everyone else is bleeding out
>BBEG "Stand down, stop fighting me, and I shall let you live. Join with me, and serve me, and I shall bring back your beloved, gifted with life so she never has to leave you again."
>The rest of the players are silent
>Deal with glares
>Phew
>The dick-ass DM ain't having any of that
>I look at him
>I calmly point his "mistake"
>he becomes visibly upset, draws attention from everyone else
>Won't show it to anyone due to it being shiny.
>silence in the room
>spots the squishy members of the party
>Cleric puts up shields to defend them
>Mishap temporarily averted.
>HOWEVER, not the fallen will ragequit
>Cleric opens a door
>Call bullshit
>DM claims the cleric cast the spell
>Call bullshit on that
>DM's face is anus-red

Are you literally just reposting from the other thread for (You)s now?

I'm sorry, what?

Can you try this again in English?

Captain Obvious should be beaten and tossed out of the party. Either he doesn't know what he's doing or he's deliberately trolling you guys.

>If there is a rumor of a bandit uprising in the east, he'll insist we go west. If there are rumors of undead rising in the north we go south.
I literally don't get it. What kind of man would go south if there is an undead rebellion down there?

Someone literally tackled me over boxing them out in Settlers. We'd been at each other's throats all game, and I thought it was all in good fun, but it turns out they were actually taking it seriously, and this was the last straw. One minute I'm giving a celebratory taunt, and the next thing I know I'm on the ground with a hundred some odd pounds of angry sperg trying to choke me.

This got posted in another thread a little while ago. user is just fishing for (you)s

>''a Paladin determines what's good and what's bad''

This is not what a Paladin is at all. That DM is shit.

is there a collection of Veeky Forums stories? I'm talking about that guy stories, tabletop stories and shit like itt

Is there more context available?

Also, is that the DM saying that any given paladin can just arbitrarily get to decide what is good and what is evil? If that were true then how would any paladins ever fall? Forcing a fall is fucking stupid, but it should be a path that the paladin's player can choose to go down.

got a couple horror stories from back when I played Yu-gi-oh! with actual cards
>play more casual decks, but build to compete against meta(I don't enjoy mirror matches)
>generally have middling winrates, enough that I'm enjoying myself, and occasionally get people siding in stuff just to counter me
>most of my locals plays shades of meta
>except the other 'nonmeta' player
>who was jewish as shit
>he did his damnedest to make money wherever he could
>and was a salty, but still cocky fucker
>would constantly hype up whatever random shit he was playing as the next top meta
>loudly bragging that everyone should play his deck
>every time he won, he would get super cocky and start pointing out every single mistake you made
>but every time he lost, he'd get salty and insist you only won because you got lucky or were just playing the OP top meta
>would steadfastly refuse handshakes if he lost, and insist on them if he won
>combine that with every possible jew tactic in the book("well, I was holding onto this, but I GUESS I can sell it...." "Well, I don't really NEED this but if you really WANT TO trade, I'll take *handful of cards not nearly equivalent in value*"
>near the end of my time there before moving
>a 9 year old comes in to play, with 20 dollars cash to spend, and a janky deck
>he has fun, and the store chips in to help him build a competent, but cheap deck
>all of us just hand him the 5-25 cent cards to make the deck
>over stomps THAT GUY, stinking of BO as he always did
>insists to this kid that he NEEDED to run a whole bunch of random garbage that was not actually needed in his deck
>and charges him almost the entirety of what he had
>kid listens to him, buys the cards
>over the next couple weeks, he starts learning his deck
>by the end of the month he's regularly beating THAT GUY, and causing the salt to pile up

cont'd with more stories of THAT GUY, as well as a second encounter with a different THAT GUY at a different store

>For a while, I find out that duel monsters was re-released as Kaijudo
>excitedly pick up the starter boxes and some boosters
>occasionally introduce players to the game, but mostly keep it to myself
>THAT GUY finds out about a new game he can try to rip people off in
>insists he discovered the game first, starts loudly harassing everyone to come play
>a few people start playing, enough that I end up working with the store owner to set up demo days
>we get a steady group of like 5 players
>he continues his extreme jewery and still losing to almost everyone
>go to regionals
>he goes 0-4 and doesn't win a single game, the worst turnout of everyone despite being the only meta deck user
>I go 1-5
>fairly soon after, I get a full time job and summer starts, cutting into my play time, and making me not want to walk in the heat to go play cards
>he constantly harasses me to come play, insists I'm the one killing the local scene(his aggression pushed several players away)
>finally have enough of it, I got tired of coming solely to shut him up
>sell my shit, stop playing
>a few months later, he goes to another regionals and has all his shit stolen
>he stops playing YGO at the big locals store, and starts going to another store with a 5-player base, insists it's the far better store to play at, and tries to harass other ygo players to come play at HIS store
>The only ones who played at the other store were turbo scrubs and children
>He was eventually laughed out of, and banned from the actual competitive store, as well as the local facebook
>I moved out soon after, and a year later started a yugitubing group
>he tried talking shit about me on the page and facebook pages, insisting I was a scrub
>I, as well as the rest of the locals scene, just laughed in his face

and that was the last I ever encountered this scrub. Next post will have the guy I encountered when I moved for college and met another THAT GUY

He sounds like kind of guy you concoct a drink mix that's 90% alcohol so you can forget about them.

>about 6 months after quitting kaijudo, move cities, going to a new locals scene
>locals is a mixed bag, largely nonmeta, but a few meta players
>largely relaxed, tight-knit community
>except for this tryhard
>my second week there, he harassed me for a game as soon as I arrived, while waiting for the tourney
>okay, I'm up for a casual game
>haha nope. Full serious mode, insisting on cutting, playing slowly and meticulously, and raging over any slight variations to tourney regulations
>he's also playing the top meta deck(unsurprisingly)
>whatever, I'm playing random jank, lose spectacularly
>he decides to start lecturing me on playing bad decks
>tourney starts
>he loses his second match, spends the rest of the night sulking
>find out he's a full tryhard who blows food budgets on keeping up with top meta decks
>this is only the beginning
>find out he was banned from the locals group for constantly starting shit
>next week, soon after round 2 of the swiss tourney starts, he suddenly gets up and starts screaming at one of the admins of the group
>insisting he be let back into the facebook group
>sits back down eventually, I later find out he lost his temper after losing game 2(after winning game 1), then insisted upon replaying game 2 because he was distracted
>oh man
>loses game 2 again, wins the match
>next round
>he gets 2-0'd
>has a vocal shitfit, grabs his deck, and runs outside into the parking lot
>THROWS HIS 800 DOLLAR DECK INTO THE PARKING LOT
>one of the MTG players trying to play EDH sees this, goes outside and picks up the cards as he's throwing his tantrum
>hands the deck back
>HE THROWS IT AGAIN
>comes back in halfway through game 5
>I'm playing apparently the only local guy he likes
>he puts his cards down in front of him, demands that he help him 'ensure the deck has a 100% winrate or help him prepare to sell it'
cont'd. also pic related.

>he sits next to us, obviously sulking, as the two of us keep playing, shooting the shit and discussing tech ideas since we're both dicking about with bad decks (I'm playing quants and he was playing aromages)
>starts interrupting the game to ask us 'how we can have fun playing decks that lose so much'
>explain how we're not playing to guarantee wins, we're just dicking about and just playing relaxed, fun games
>he glares, doesn't get it
>next week, find out he's spent another several hundred dollars on another meta deck
>rages and sulks again when he loses matches
>find out he's 'afraid of losing' because he literally sees himself as an anime character
>and believes that if he loses, he'll be treated and viewed as trash
>because his shitty uni scene mocks him for losing
>try to explain that his attitude is what gets him mocked and banned, not losing games occasionally
>he continues insisting otherwise
>I eventually get put on his blacklist for 'spreading lies and bullying'
>when all I did was try to calm him down and point out that if he doesn't want to spend so much on new decks, he could just stick with one or just play casually, like most of the rest of the local players did
oh yeah, he had a blacklist too, and legitimately believed people were afraid to be put on it, or hurt/offended by being blacklisted by him. Pic related. this was from before I got added though

>Deal with glares
>Phew
>The dick-ass DM ain't having any of that

the fuck are you even trying to say?

People actually keep lists like that? What sort moron were you dealing with?

The guy literally compared himself to a shonen anime character and couldn't comprehend the idea of a luck-based game being impossible to Solve.

>all of the people blocked (including you) are listed as having either bullied that guy, supported other people bullying that guy, made rude comments about that guy, or some combination thereof
How can one man be this thin-skinned

Jesus how horrifying. I suppose it is a good thing I never got into the card game scene so I don't run into nuts like him.

There's a legendary story on the cesspool known as Giant in the Playground, which ends with the DM getting stabbed in the gut by his fiancee.

Yes. I got two players to get in a fistfight over a love interest. I was basically horrified. It turned out that one dude had his girlfriend leave him for another man, and he was projecting pretty hard.

Like, I had no idea. I kept saying "Guys, she's *not real*" but it didn't seem to help. It turned out that the first guy had a crush on me, and he was even more crushed when I told him I wasn't interested (and already had a boyfriend). It just got awkward after that.

And then you kissed

Fucking hell.

Sounds like a story!

Basically, the first PC had a childhood companion, and he made overtures to her. But the second PC was secretly dating her, and she ultimately chose the second PC. Mostly because, well, he was a noble, more confident and more classy. I didn't know that this was basically what had actually happened to the first player. She basically told him "It's not that I don't like you, but there's someone I like more."

Then all hell broke loose.

And that someone else was PC2. It's like poetry, it rhymes.

Meh, if that's what you made happen, I don't like your GMing style

>if that's what you made happen
>my childhood companion waifu is reserved for me, that's what my animes taught me
Stop

It was just a subplot. I had NO IDEA the guy would take it so personally. I mean, it was a fair competition and the better man won. Like, she wasn't obliged to pick the guy she grew up with! It would have been dishonest.

Ok kids story time
>fat fuck at local comic shop
>customers complain about his HORRIBLE god awful smell
>seriously this guy smelled like rotten ass cheese
>management tells him to leave and come back when he does something about his hygene
>fatty ding dong comes in 10 minutes later smelling like rotten ass cheese and FUCKING LYSOL
>This guy drenched himself in lysol or febreeze instead of taking a goddamn shower
>was told to leave again
BUT WAIT THERES MORE
>the next day, someone tells the management about him being a registered sex offender
>turns out he diddled a 9 year old girl in a wheelchair
>fatass walks in the door
>gets his ass chewed out instantly, banned for life, manager said some colorful things
Fuck you, Steve Bushman, i hope satan shoves a wheelchair up your ass in hell

Unless you're playing some sort of "rose of Versailles" romantic RPG (and why would you), there's literally no point in frustrating a player like that.
At the first sign of overture, she should have cleared the situation, none of that "secretary dating" bullshit that let expectation build in the meantime.

But hey, it's not like we play RPGs to enjoy ourselves, right?

*Secret dating, fucking autocorrect

> First session with new group, all level 1-2
> Takes half an hour to decide where we're going
> Find a town harassed by bandits
> Make a plan to ambush them so the townsfolk don't get hurt
> Fuck it we'll just start a bar fight
> Um, ok
> Bar gets rekt
> Bandits are losing the fight, turn to flee
> Nope, gotta hunt down every last one to prevent an alarm
> We're literally shooting these people in the back as they're running
> One of them made it out of the gates, but he's on foot, and we have a knight
> Guy on foot gets run down with a lance in his back
> "Alright, everyone mark XP"

I feel so dirty

It feels weird and vaguely gross to just roll over like that. I mean, it really could have gone either way, and I was glad to have the PCs invested in something other than mass murder.

No offense, but you sound like you have an inordinate fear of being cucked.

This is the kind of inter-party drama and intrigue I wish I could pull off as a GM. Shame your players suffer from terminal autism.

I don't mean she should have chosen the childhood friend, it's the secret thing that I disagree on.

I mean, how much time passed from the first sign of interest from the childhood friend, to the reveal of the other guy's interest?
For the players, I mean, not in game.

Haha could be

>shoves the dude
>really?

Should have socked that fat fuck in the gab

...

About a year.

Fuck you Sam, that girl wanted it and I do NOT smell like ass cheese.

Wow, that's a lot of frustrated expectation going on.

And was it in some way connected with the main plot?
Now I'm genuinely curious about the campaign.

Ouch, sounds really dramatic and painful to say the least.

While I agree that those two went overboard, I must ask what did you think would happen with the party itself after all of this would come up?

Did you think that their characters would just shake hands and be over it?
Because the best case scenario from that point seems to be the party breaking up, and worst being them killing eachother characters.

Good. I find pigs work best

>be me (20 years of age)
>friend invites me to his DnD group (5e)
>last time I played DnD was 2e ages ago
>learning new rules, enjoying simplification
>get to host's place, it's clean and tidy with plenty of space
>everyone brought food or drinks
>think to myself "this is too good to be true, what's gonna fuck up"
>roll a sorcerer as no one wants to play a heavy caster
>two people pick paladin (uh-oh)
>session after session these "paladins" prove to be the worst players ever
>one paladin is tricked into holding a bomb-like device meant to kill a pure-of-heart person holding it
>before timer goes off, paladin hands it to child without blinking and party moves on
>DM too autistic and lonely to piss off his only friends by making paladins fall
>paladins later kill my character for slaying too many sahuagins INHERENTLY EVIL BEINGS
>I fight through it
>roll bard and press on with party in underdark
>subterranean lake, ice devils kidnapping people from floating town
>paladins MAKE A DEAL WITH THEM FOR SAFE PASSAGE
I never played with that group again, made me want to kill myself

link?

Maybe that is how that person is playing a paladin. Maybe that is what paladins do in that world. You don't know, so don't call a DM shit when you only hear 1 sentence.

I think Captain Obvious is just a retard or a grade-a dick if that is what he odes with all his characters. baka.

Who even plays Yu-gi-oh nowadays?
Who even played it ever?

This level of autism is so high i cannot imagine the afflicted being a human being

I basically got put off a RPG games forever because of a shitty GM for my first ever RPG that I didn't realize was so bad till later.
>never came prepared with a story
>not even a map of where we were
>never deviated from the standard DnD/PT lore and creatures, no original concepts.
>had DMPCs, many of which were ripped from anime characters, all much stronger than the rest of the party.
>never really tried to quell the that guy meta bullshit but always argued with players whenever they were not being serious/joking around occasionaly.
>ran lots of obscure references and inside jokes in his games.

Anyone ever had a really bad first time experiance in RPGs?

About the map thing, don't forget that you are a character in the world, draw your own map of the world as you see it. Ask your DM to give you basic info so it isn't 100% garbo.

That game is basically dead at this point, that would been a good idea but the GM was pretty lazy so he possibly wouldn't of thought of much info, plus a lot of the campaign took place in the underdark any hows.

Fucking kek, nice one.

See, we're all grown adults, and we're playing an RPG. I honestly thought it would just be resolved. Like, you take your simulated victory for bragging rights.

I didn't expect those two idiots to punch it out right there.

> Anyone ever had a really bad first time experiance in RPGs?

my first time was some 5e homebrew, my character was a homebrew pregen, I didn't say anything until my name was called in combat. I wasn't invited to the next session.

I mean, sure, I was a wallflower, but the GM didn't try to engage me at all.

giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?95189-New-Worst-Session-How-Lanky-got-hisself-stabbed!

>cesspool

How so? I get that many people here don't like OotS, but is there a deep running rot that I'm not aware of?

Just to make it clear, I'm not making excuses for these two stooges beating up eachother, but making an observation as a fellow GM.

>See, we're all grown adults, and we're playing an RPG.
That is true, but adults get emotionally invested in fiction (books, games, movies etc.).
Perhaps you are a great GM and get your players easily invested into your games.

>I honestly thought it would just be resolved.
My main question from previous post was refering to that: how did you expect that situation to be resolved?
And another one: did these two hint it to you in any way that they are very invested in this subplot, even more than main one?

>Like, you take your simulated victory for bragging rights.
Nothing of the sort, I'm just putting my understanding of human behaviour and empathy to use.

If PC1 would get in-game emotionally scarred by actions of PC2, what reason would he have to stick around and endure it further?
If that emotional investment would be too great to bear, it would overtake logic and dull common sense in PC1 actions, resulting in a fight.
Both of these outcomes I can understand, as emotions / emotional pain can bypass PC logic.

So, PC1 either leaves the party and rerolls or fights it out with PC2 and depending on victor that person rerolls.

Perhaps there were more variables to this story, but this is all we know so far in this thread.

On a sidenote, if my players decided to go MMA I'd just toss the one that started shit out through the door.

And that, kids, is why you don't stick your dick in crazy.

Imagine everything wrong with play-by-post games.

GitP is the ur-example of all of them.

I typically avoid PbP due to being too slow, so if you could elaborate...

>that one guy who always makes it clear to everyone that LGBTQTTTBBQ+ is super cool and everyone should support it
>the guy who respects all the women and roleplays as a super nice guy(tm) and identifies as a queer demi-semi-pansexual snowflake

Two dudes love the same woman is the driving factor in A FUCKING LOT OF TRAGEDIES

THE WORD TRAGEDY SHOULD FUCKING TELL YOU WHY THIS SHIT MAY BE BAD FOR PARTY COHESION

>First session in a long time last night
>Feeling good, party has a set objective to complete from previous session so we hop right into it
>Goblin in our group calls himself "Skarsnik" and immediately just starts wailing: "I'M DA BOSS!!!" over and over again
>Other player is a Tiefling Paladin (he calls himself a Daedra ....)
>Fight breaks out with some goblins
>He walks away mid fight and starts looking for animals to talk too
>w h a t
>Other player is a Witch Doctor who monologues in a shitty Jamaican accent every spell and endlessly looks through his spellbook
>just. to. fucking. cast. eldritch. fucking. bolt.
>last player is an ex-pirate and the only semi-normal character
>winds up randomly getting up from the table when a friend unexpectedly shows up
>begin to drink more alcohol to try and give myself motivation to keep this game alive

It got progressively worse and worse as the night went on. The """Daedra""" would just walk away from the combat zone and just start doing random investigation checks trying to look for animals to talk too. I'm not even kidding.

It took them well over half an hour to fight 7 fucking goblins.

Oh and to absolutely no one's fucking surprise about an hour into the session our beloved "DAEDRA" got "BORED" and fell asleep at the fucking table.

The entire time the Goblin is continually SCREAMING his lines out in a nasal voice, the Witch Doctor has no fucking clue what is going on and the Pirate is AWOL from the table.

After the session they couldn't figure out why it took so long to kill SEVEN FUCKING GOBLINS. LITERALLY POINT AND FUCKING CLICK. FOR FUCK SAKE

Yes, but it's a *game*. I don't expect a player to have an emotional breakdown if his PC dies. I mean, we're just sitting around this table.

More, it would be really stupid if he just won the girl for no apparent reason. I did not, at any point, say that she was going to be his love interest. I just introduced an NPC for the players to interact with.

Not getting the girl isn't the end of the world. It would be the worst kind of entitlement for her to just go "Oh, he's my childhood friend, he wins me by default." I'm not sure I have the words to describe how fucked-up that would be.

>spent the rest of the night sharpening knives in the dark while sobbing.

...

>Not getting the girl isn't the end of the world
>wheredoyouthinkyouare.jpg
But mostly it just sounds like you tripped over that guys emotional baggage. Better luck next time

10/10

>playing Dungeon World

So did I.

>LITERALLY POINT AND FUCKING CLICK.
What exactly were you playing?

Do you legitimately have autism?

How did you expect this to go down in-character, even if it didn't provoke an OOC response? A PC seducing another PC's long-term crush behind his back is not something that ends well.

Is there something wrong with that? Like for real, who in their right mind wants to be cucked

>it's a *game*
not two breaths later:
>I don't have the words to describe how fucked up [a relationship being game-y] would be
I dunno man I think two people vying for the same chick is a recipe for disaster, shoulda just had the second guy get told like "sorry but I don't wanna hurt PC1" and avoid every potential Maniac Manchild Massacre that could result from the alternative

DnD 5e. Combat is a fucking breeze but the players were so unbelievably autistic.

Are you the GM of this dude?

My story has been told here before, but I'll share a quick recap.
>Suggest Rifts to people that have never played anything more than 3.5
>Dude literally pulls his pistol out.
>Announces to the room, "See this? This is the safety switch."
>Presses it, and points the gun at me.
>Laughs like this is the funniest thing in the world.
>Grabs another player's character sheet, and hides the pistol behind it.
>"Look! Now no one can say they saw me shot at you!"
>Leaves after he says, "No 6 hour character creation for me!"
>Never invite him back.
>Played Rifts the next week.

One of the scariest moments of my life; I think I handled it well, though. I didn't budge or flinch; Plus, if he did, I'm pretty sure my friends would've gotten him.
(The first session was definitely the best one I had ever ran.)

>Excellent GM advice

Well put mate

Dude, you literally created a cuckolding scenario. You're too autistic to understand how most players would react. Even the most emotionally detached player would be annoyed for wasting their time, deceiving them, destroying the party cohesion, and possibly destroying the characters entire motivation.

That's creepy as fuck; did you know the guy, or was this the first time you met him?

I feel like this is a sane and rational response to being asked to play Rifts.

You put into motion the plot to the average Opera Seria and expected for no rapiers to come out.

Even if the players were good sports, you would expect to get in some shit like Eugene Onegin or Orlando Furioso over that.