How do we fix the Elf problem?

Cowardice
Racism
Ridiculous Lifespan
Affinity for nature, which in itself is boring as fuck

All of these things can be expounded upon, but I'm tired as fuck.

I hate neopolitan races.

I bet you don't even have a source on the cowardice.

Proposed solution....

Treat Elves like Ayleids from Elder Scrolls.

They were a tyrannical race that enslaved others, worshipped demons, and fucked themselves over, and now their ruins dot the landscape.

Don't forget the Winged Elves, the Werewolf-Elves the Rock Elves etc.

Yeah. They hide in trees and set up ambushes.

The Ayleids weren't all bad. They were like a loose confederation of city states and each had its own culture, some being traditional Aedra worshippers and kind to the humans. Many of them even helped the the humans and thrived in the Alessian empire until a bunch of religious nut jobs listening to a retarded monkey took over.

Nice source on your straw elves.

that's smart, not cowardly

"Elves are cautious warriors and take time to analyze their opponents and the location of the fight if at all possible, maximizing their advantage by using ambushes, snipers, and camouflage. They prefer to fire from cover and retreat before they are found, repeating this maneuver until all of their enemies are dead.

They prefer longbows, shortbows, rapiers, and longswords. In melee, elves are graceful and deadly, using complex maneuvers that are beautiful to observe. Their wizards often use sleep spells during combat because these won’t affect other elves."

3.5 Monster Manual.

Good, so where is the cowardice?

So you are saying that they are cowards for using guerilla tactics when their armies are low in numbers due to reproductive issues?

Right here.

They use their cowardly shoot them up and retreat tactics on humans.

This is your dumb interpretation of cowardice, here you have some actual canon cowardice:

>Goblins have a poor grasp of strategy and are cowardly by nature, tending to flee the field if a battle turns against them. With proper supervision, though, they can implement reasonably complex plans, and in such circumstances their numbers can be a deadly advantage.

The way you are making this about humans, which nobody was talking about, makes it seem like you are just some eternally butthurt HFY-fag.

There are rules to warfare, and elves do not abide by them. In my eyes, they are cowards.

Sorry, that's also 3.5e.

With lava. Lots and lots of lava.

Fuck Elves.

>There are rules to warfare
Sorry, I'm checking Sun Tzu and I'm not finding anything about a "no ambush"-rule. Who exactly wrote these rules of warfare down?

>Dwarflet cries because his race can't into ranged weaponry or spells.

Humans.

And we barely abide by them because they're stupid.

Sun Tzu was a human.

And he probably would have called Elves cowards as well.

Nah.
He would have avoided conflict with them by waging economic warfare instead or allied him self with them.
He'd also adopt their tactics for speical units.

Ambushes, espionage and even assassination are tactics he recommends. Your "human" rules of warfare don't exist.

IHL, International Humanitarian Laws, or LoAC, Laws of Armed Conflict, were created by humans.

It's not called International Elvenitarian Laws.

#1 stay off their forests, there's nothing there anyways.
#2 marry ogres.

>It's not called International Elvenitarian Laws
This might shock you, but it's probably because elves don't exist.

That's exactly what they want you to think. They're out there somewhere in the many wild biomes of the world and even places like the moon.

Elves like in Iceland and eat pancakes. They sometimes invite people over.

They live in Agartha or Alfheim, depending on if they are Dark Elves or Light Elves.

With the Final So(u)lution

This is why you bless the scroll first user.
So you can murder *all elves*.

Go to Iceland. Break boulders. Watch the invisible homeless benefit applicants pile up. Demonize the poor as lazy and soaking up the precious few króna from social safety net (which is already running low due to the budget you put forth). Rely on the general public having a poor understanding of economics and the social systems after being brainwashed by of poorly constructed Randian libertarian philosophy. Set up your reelection campaign on a platform of vague platitudes of social reforms and fighting for the public against recklessness on a national level which you blame your opponent for supporting.

Wait, how did we get here?

I know it's not gonna be popular to say, but I think we have a pretty good handle on elves here in Tyran. We just wait for them to commit a crime (they always do, it's in their blood) and then hand them over to the Possessed. You turn an elf straight into a vessel for a productive member of society.

I mean they're demons from hell and all, but they're at least willing to integrate and do jobs that most people wouldn't want to. Ya got your succubus possessed prostitutes, legion possessed soldiers, and arch vile possess underwater welders. All we had to give up was the souls of some elves who'd just be a drain anyways.
#2 marry ogres
I can confirm this to be a pro-move.Get yourself a perfect wife all in one package. She's strong enough to lift a care, has tits the size bean bag chairs, and her metabolism is fast enough that she can't retain body fat for more than a week without ltierally constantly eating. Best bit is that she'll drink enough that no matter how big of an alcoholic you are, she's never gonna say a thing. The only downside would be that her brothers might ass rape you, but hey for some guys that might be a plus.

Fucking Nazis. Couldn't they have left the snazzy uniforms to someone else?

We humans need to mix with higher IQ dwarves. Plus dwarves make beautiful wives. They are more traditional anyway and haven't been with a hundred orc dicks by the time they show interest in you. Not degenerate like elven women.

Race mixing degenerate.

Said like a man who has a very limited pool of reference of army uniforms.

This literally sounds like white nationalist cuckolds who say get Asian wives
>high IQ
>muh traditional stuff
>They're not whores like elf/white women

...

And proud of it.

...

>white nationalist
>proposing race mixing

But the people of the western Balkans exist.

I mean you should get Asian wives, and black wives, and Slav wives, and Arab wives, etc. Hybrid vigor man, it's a hell of a drug.

In a fantasy setting that imperative is even stronger. You should go out there and fuck every single species with compatible genitals you can find. Breed the dragons until there are no dragons left, only humanoids with vaguely present dragon traits because of how many you fucked. Breed them out, dilute their genes to nothing.

>Eldar-fan
>gets them completely wrong

>We humans need to mix with higher IQ dwarves. Plus dwarves make beautiful wives. They are more traditional anyway and haven't been with a hundred orc dicks by the time they show interest in you. Not degenerate like elven women.

>He wants to marry a bearded womanlet...

Eh. I still think the Nazis were better.

This dude gets it.

>Breed them out, dilute their genes to nothing
Oy vey

>Breed the dragons until there are no dragons left, only humanoids with vaguely present dragon traits because of how many you fucked. Breed them out, dilute their genes to nothing
This sounds a lot like fire emblem's Arcadia, only it seems that it was the dragons who couldn't resist humans. And they are so mixed the half dragons don't even look any different from humans aside from their vastly longer lives.

Do that to the jews.

Good.

>Primaris Marines turn out to be taller and more chad because Cawl threw Eldar DNA into the mix

Eh I could see the argument for Nazi dress uniforms being better, but you're objectively wrong if you're talking about field uniforms. Those grey shirts sucked because they're always going to be compared to the same color uniforms they were imitating from WW1 which were way better.

Already did. Her parents refuse to acknowledge any grand kids with even a drop of Gentile blood. Thus one Jewish family line is ended with my penis.

I allready banged a Jewish woman but she explained that the kids can only be Jewish via their maternal line so only kids of Jewish men + Goyim women aren't considered Jewish...

It's a silly tradition stemming from the rape culture that existed and continues to exist in the middle east.

So like Elder Scrolls?

Yeah. Like Elder Scrolls.

This isn't dwarf fortress if one of your morons doesn't try to punch a hole through that wall and kill everyone.

CAAAAAAAAAAWL rings out for the nth time today as Rowboat realize what ELSE was shoved into the project.

Something something /pol/ pls go?

Breed the Elf genes out of them overtime

>54677973
Stupid elf-fapper doesn't know how genetics work in TES.

>How do we fix the Elf problem?

easy my Lord by removing their Culture and history focusing them to learn human law, Culture and gods.

in 40 to 60 years the youngest of the Eifs will only know human Culture.

>Breed the Elf genes out of them overtime
> overtime

An elf lives 300 years normally and up to 700 if they train a proper proffesion...

If anything they would start to breed out the genes of humans until only half-elves and full elves remain.

even better

Genocide, slavery or deportation.

Stop hating on Elves.

is that a serious response?

Excuse me?

Here's how:
>Side with the drow and work together to convince the non-dark elves of their elven privilege.
>Proceed to befriend the elves most receptive to this message that, for elven culture to survive, they must combat their declining birthrates by allowing the quick breeding humans in to survive.
>Advocate for the human race within elven culture. If an elf questions this, remind them that to ignore humans in need is selfish, and selfishness is part of evil alignments
>Continue to out breed elves while conspiring with drow to bring in even more humans
>Conspire with drow to convince elves and having half-life babies is a beautiful thing, and that having elf babies means they hate beautiful things- which is what evil alignments do

With any luck, you'll be able to breed the elves into demographic oblivion. As an added bonus, you'll also destroy elven civilization and infrastructure simply because there won't be any elves left to maintain it. Humans don't live long enough to learn proper elven arts, so we're biologically predisposed to not being able to understand how elven technology/magic works.

And that's how you end the elven question once and for all.

Doing Adolf's work, senpai.

I feel I'm working in a more Ghengis Khan kinda route. Fuck as many people of different races as possible then settle down with someone to propagate your own. Killing someone because of their race is just admitting yours is inferior in virility.

Of course again by Genghis's standard I don't oppose wars to exterminate political organizations or specific locations. I just think doing it along racial lines is admitting that you're an inferior.

The fuck you just say to me