"I want to knock the table over and take cover behind it."
>That's a standard action plus a DC 15 Strength check, and then to dive behind it you have to roll a DC 25 Tumble check.
"Ummm...I rolled a one."
>LOL NATURAL ONE! YOU FALL OVER AND BREAK YOUR LEG, TAKE 2d6 DAMAGE.
All of this has happened before, and all of it will happen again.
Yep. Looks like Dungeons and Dragons has finally cemented its place as a containment RPG. It's not like this wasn't already a thing. Ever since third edition came out the trend was already starting. Fourth edition came with the popularity surge of The Big Bang Theory which resulted in a spike in sales, which was not enough to save 4e's badly-written mechanics. Fifth edition was specifically watered down to be palatable both to grognards (who do not rely on the active D&D community nor do they need a new ruleset, thus this pandering was stupid) and to normies, who flocked to the game in great masses thanks to the game's appearance on two terrible TV shows (Stranger Things and Big Bang Theory). Also, the prevalence of Critical Role podcast created quite a lot of love for D&D, which found itself inundated by waves of new players. Wizards of the Coast saw sales skyrocketing, giving them the false message that dumbing down the game represented an improvement in game design (though they did streamline many of the mechanics, which *was* a good thing). As a result, Wizards is very happy with this diluting of the Dungeons and Dragons fanbase. Veeky Forums has also deluded itself into thinking this influx of players is a good thing. This lack of foresight is to be expected. D&D is now the containment RPG. It keeps the dumb-ass Skyrim addicts and the brain-dead hipster roasties who can't even figure out which die to roll, out of the good RPGs. Which is sad, because D&D, despite being shit in many small ways, was overall a very fun and enjoyable roleplaying game. It was structured that way. However, the fanbase it is now attracting is making it intolerable, and the way said fanbase is guiding the mechanics is a direction that would make a game like Dungeon World seem sophisticated.
So, in short, D&D is dead, but thank god for its existence.
Stop being crap at rolling
When I started seeing these threads at least twice a week.
And I don't even play D&D
This has never happened in a game and is completely unreasonable to assume it would ever happen.
>My game master is a dick and makes up stupid house rules that aren't in the book, which is clearly the book's fault and not his!
All replies to this troll thread are just other trolls bumping this thread.
Don't fall for their tricks. Just ignore this thread and leave these idiots to bumping it between themselves.
Interesting. You describe a situation that never happened, and indeed is not permitted in the book, which is perfectly clear that natural 1s matter in attack rolls, saving throws, and nothing else.
What if I use sage?
>I want to knock the table over and take cover behind it
Probably a move action at worst. Wouldn't call for a check unless the table was bolted down.
>NATURAL ONE
Also, critical failure/success is for attack rolls only, this is basic shit to the point where it's essentially a litmus test for when somebody/media is just pretending to know what D&D is like or not.
The real problem is going to arise when you realize that the wooden table you're taking cover behind isn't going to be terribly useful against the giant stone golem who is going to kick both it and you across the bar.
Yes, because everyone already knows OP is just full of shit, and there's no reason to add to the reply count to boost his ego.
Please, let this be my last reply to this thread.
Let this be everyone's last reply to this thread.
Why is a stone golem in a bar?
What are you fighting it in a bar?
Critical failure has never been a rule and making a nat 1 have any actual affect other than simply failing (if you still fail with modifiers) is only done by shit DMs
None of that is in the rules. Your DM fucked you over, not the system.
This is gonna be a different angle than the usual shit like system shortcomings or weird stuff that happens when you RAW, or imbalanced classes.
I have lazy players. I have almost always met lazy-ass fucks that want to play D&D, but won't read anything, not even the PHB, not even the parts that pertain to their own damn class, not even what dice to roll when.
The only people that are actually qualified to play D&D are other DMs, and often, they prefer running their own games or your styles clash.
D&D is a heavy system with lots of nooks and crannies, tips and tricks, and so on. You will rarely have a truly enjoyable and great experience unless you're playing with other experienced DMs, and have a very dedicated group that will make great sessions together.
That's why I stopped playing D&D, because to have fun with it, you have to take care of an amazing amount of parameters, the hardest one being fellow players and quality DMs. I went to 2ed, then OSR, then microsystems because they're really easy to learn and don't require much bookkeeping.
I don't want to ever again hear someone go "what do I roll to attack" in session 14.
(You)
Stop playing 3.PF
>Why is a stone golem in a bar?
Getting a drink
>What are you fighting it in a bar?
Assuming you meant why, because drunks make terrible decisions.
>DC15 to knock over a table
what kind of table requires a difficult STR check? is it an iron table bolted to the ground?
and 2d6 for tripping?
being knocked prone is a more reasonable punishment, and DC25 to avoid it? what was on that table? quantum tripwire?
what kind of bar is that? I am legitimately curious
>STOP HAVING BAD WRONG FUN! STOP IT! STOP IT! STOP!
Just got back form playing with my friends. We had """"FUN""""
Maybe you should stop playing with shitty people. :^)
>Probably a move action at worst
I'd say it's a standard at low level since concealment/cover provides a significant advantage in a fight, forcing your opponents to either rush you or take shots that have a significantly higher just of just being ass.
At higher level play it should be a move action solely because there are so many other more useful things you could be doing with a standard action than table flipping.
>Why is a stone golem in a bar?
Because there's a wizard the adventurers keep pissing off by ruining his plans and taking his stuff, so he sent a golem to kill them it just happened that they were in a bar.
>What are you fighting it in a bar?
Why aren't you fighting a golem in a bar?
"I want to knock the table over and take cover behind it."
>That's a standard action plus a DC 15 Strength check, and then to dive behind it you have to roll a DC 25 Tumble check.
"Ummm...I rolled a 20."
>LOL NAT TWENNY! YOU KICK THE TABLE SO HARD IT SHATTERS INTO SPLINTERS.
Consider the following:
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>>When did you realize you were playing D&D wrong
>>When did you realize you learned to argue at Strawman University in Strawman 101?
>>Where did Gygax touch you?
This is you. Gaze into he dark abyss of your soul.
>try not D&D game
>is no epic
>pomise to never play these poopy poop poop games
FUC YOU D&D EPIC I KILL YOU, NO INSULT D&D IS BEST FAK UUUU!!!!!!
>not playing 5e
>object interaction to flip table, stand behind it for half cover or fall prone for full cover
... Eh, 4e probably did something like that first.
>Stranger things
>terrible
I will gut you like a knife
dozens of non-D&D games have critical success/failure rules and they function just fine. stop acting like a retard
>Critical failure has never been a rule and making a nat 1 have any actual affect other than simply failing (if you still fail with modifiers) is only done by shit DMs
>t. newbie GM
are you really so bereft of imagination that you can't think of a cool complication between simple failure and a fractured leg?
...but nobody knows for sure because they've never played it.
>Stranger Things was terrible
The only terrible thing about that was the girl still winding up with the Chad at the end of the show.
The chad wasn't even that bad, also they just completely ignored the death of Ugly Friend Girl but its not like anyone missed her anyway
When negative things happen 1/20 times for doing mundane shit, like throwing over a table, I'm going to roll a caster instead so I don't need to worry about gruel splashing all over my warrior making him look like bukkake porn victim for trying to throw over a table.
Right so
I normally avoid these threads
But you literally got zero rules correct
None of the things you described are in the rules of any edition
Moving a table would probably be a move action, and wouldn't require a check. If it did require a check, DC 15 is ridiculously high for an ability check.
Taking cover behind it wouldn't require a check either, it's just a thing that you can do. If you want total cover, you'd probably have to drop prone (a free action) or crouch or something.
A natural 1 isn't an automatic fail on an ability check, only saves and attack rolls. And critical fails like you describe don't actually exist anywhere in the rules, so even if everything else was a thing you wouldn't break your leg.
Dnd is by no means a system. But you are flat-out wrong in every respect of why you think this
what would you suggest as an alternative?
Your DM sucks ass.
Since when does diving to cover count as a tumble move ?
And why the fuck does a table need a DC 15 to tip over ? Is it made out of Iron ?
Plus citical failure is cancer and should never be used.
tl;dr
Eh, remembering an official encounter that did it takes way too much effort.
Particularly given that dungeon fights and outside skirmishes wouldn't have tables to flip.
Doesn't matter, got (You)
Most people would just let them flip the table without any hassle unless the character had like 5 strength.
Every D&D is fine, except 3.x (and even then, it's okay with heavy houseruling and being very picky about what tier of content is allowed, the problem is mostly with "core only" games and/or with low system mastery players) for what they are.
Not sure what to suggest, I enjoyed "playing D&D" in generic systems like Savage Worlds, FATE and Strike! (technically 4e derived but w/e). Lots of OSR stuff is pretty great, like Barbarians of Lemuria, if you prefer the oder games.
What an incredible amount of bollocks. Take a moment to think of all the productive things you could have been doing rather than spouting utter nonsense.
> taking the bait this hard.
Sorry but that's just bad GMing, it has nothing to do with why D&D is shit.
>are you really so bereft of imagination that you can't think of a cool complication between simple failure and a fractured leg?
If you want critical failures and "cool complications", you should just stop playing D&D, retard.
>Boo hoo the outcast loser didn't get the girl just like in real life
Steve was a good character who changed and proved his worth by the end of the season, camera boy had zero development and was literally just a vessel for sensitive incels to project themselves onto.
It's all Veeky Forums is good for nowadays.
Why can't you incels keep your butt-tears contained to /r9k/ where they belong?
Bean Bag Buccaneers is a two player children's game, the object of which is to pick up your treasure chest on the central island and sail back safely.
Each player has a giant sailing ship as their main game piece. Each ship has a removable sail, two trigger-action side panels, and a huge spring-driven cannon. Players take turns moving forward along a prescribed track and shooting bean bags at their opponent's ship. A hit on one of the side panels will force it to pop off and give the player a free shot at the other side; a hit forcing the sail off becalms the ship for a turn.
To add to the pirate flavor, each player also has an eye patch. Wearing these will slightly affect depth perception and add a marginal bit of sport to the shooting.
This game retailed for the somewhat impressive sum of $16 back in 1962. With its huge plastic ships (close to a foot long), giant vinyl play mat, and the eye patches, it may well stand as one of the more overproduced games of the early 1960s. Bean Bag Buccaneers.
Shame you never realised your DM was garbage
Meanwhile in Fate
>Create advantage
>Fail miserably
>The table flips on its back, you are now "Out in the field" with one free invoke for your enemies
sounds alright
All I know is whenever I run a 40k run like with Only War or Dark Heresy, it always goes *relatively* normal
But the FIRST TIME I fucking try to run a DND game at the behest of a friend, I get a guy who tries to make his character a half-orc/half-human fucking rogue who's basically the biggest mary sue there was (not only stealthy but charismatic, handsome, strong, good fighter, etc) and then got all pissed off when other players got mad and towards me when I told him that his character basically would break the game and he needed to change it before I accepted it
>it was a good idea to reply to this copypasta
That's my imitation of you.
DND is one of those games where the mary sue's come out in droves to pitch their shitty characters (like Mr.Do-No-Wrong's) and when things don't go the way they want for their character they pitch a bitchfit and quit.
LOL no.
>DC
You can't call D&D garbage if you've never played it.
Could you do this on r/DnD instead and then send screenshots? You would obviously have to be more subtle to avoid being down-voted into oblivion but I think it would be funny
Play GURPS instead
>Houserules
Is actually a variant rule, 100% official. Only dicks use it though.
>But GURPS is garbage too! Where am I supposed to find that many d32s? And there are only three sourcebooks, and they're all in Hungarian!
At least it's better than World of Darkness, which is just about roleplaying blind people.
Critical Success or Failure, DMG pg 242
Rolling a 20 or a 1 on an ability check or a saving throw doesn't normally have any special effect. However, you can choose to take such an exceptional roll into account when adjudicating the outcome. It's up to you to determine how this manifests in the game. An easy approach is to increase the impact of the success or failure. [...]
Knocking over a regular table is a very easy - easy task so DC 5-10 at most.
You don't need to roll a tumble check to hide behind something you just move behind it.
You can't critically fail skill rolls, nor is the penalty for failing a skill roll damage or anything beyond not completing the task.
Are you even trying?
>All this people not knowing the rules
I mean, OP is baiting, but you clearly know shit about D&D
>4es badly written mechanics
The mechanics were the only thing that wasn't badly written.
And the fluff for anything that wasn't FR... then again for FR it's par for course
Op is clearly baiting but DnD is a shit
Well, technically monster's HP in the first MM was really badly writen. Rest was pretty tight, maybe too tight which gave it that gamey feeling
>I don't like that a popular thing is popular
Assuming 5e:
>DC 5
Flip table as action
>DC 10
Flip table as movement
>DC 15
Flip table as bonus action
>DC 20
Flip table as free action
Table provides half cover
That is an opinion I can respect, unlike the "lol is Warcraft" meme.
Anyone who has ever played a video game ever should realize it was a rip off of Final Fantasy Tactics, a game that is beloved by all.
>but DnD is a shit
Tell me about it
>Character can jump way further than 40ft, cool, that's awesome, totally wuxia. Love my monk.
>wait...1/4th of that is how high I reach, which is +10ft, but wait, I take 1d6 and fall prone for every 10ft I fall, so, even if I ignore the first 10ft due tumble I still take damage because I jumped further than 40ft long, therefore more than 10ft high...so are you telling me that everytime I jump I will take damage and fall prone? the fuck?
And this is just 0.00000000001% of what monks have to endure in this shit, and that's nothing compared to what all martials have to endure.
Lies. I can't dragoon.
>those made up rules
Yes, as GM you're free to come up with whatever you imagine, as OP's GM did, but the nat1 on skills is not a made up shit, is actually in the DMG as variant rule in 3.5.
>shitty variant rule
>relevant
Unless your DM is a tard, nat 1 randumbness shouldn't be a problem. D&D has problems sure, but a variant rule that idiots take too far is not one inherent to the system, maybe the community though.
>Is not system's fault to have shitty rules, is DM's for using them
nat20 on apologist
>variant
nat1 on reading comprehension
>If it's a variant rule then is not a rule
Speaking of reading comprehension
Heheh, that's not tru...[reads Jump skill] the actual fuck?!
Well, at least PF fixe...[reads Acrobatics] what the shit?!
Fuck, monks have like +20 to jump just from leveling in monk +24 extra just from movement, YOURE GOING TO JUMP FURTHER THAN 40ft ALWAYS!
The only thing that is missing (after 5 minutes of looking around) is doing it all in plate. Which should be possible with some multiclassing. If that doesn't matter to you, here:
funin.space
funin.space
funin.space
D&D is full of shit like that, I remember a feat that gave you +4 to trip creatures 2 sizes bigger than you and +8 if they were 3 sizes bigger...but then you realize you can't trip creatures more than 1 size bigger than you making it effectively the Trappest Option of feats
Sounds like more a retarded GM then a problem with D&D.
Surely the feat gives the ability to trip creatures more than 1 size bigger than you?
Actually it doesn't. It's worded so precisely to not give you that it seems to be done on purpose.
>PF fixing things.
The memes!
Which is why I appreciate that most 4e spend character features just lets you do the thing, regardless of size.
I know, is part of the joke
A prophet.
It says "When attempting to trip a creature more than 1 size...", but you can't make such attempts as stated by the rules.
Same way that feats that say "When flying..." don't give you the ablity to fly.
"I want to knock the table over and take cover behind it."
>That's a standard action plus a DC 15 Strength check, and then to dive behind it you have to roll a DC 25 Tumble check.
"Ummm...I rolled a 10."
>Oh, [yawn] the enemy are so bored by your action they fall asleep, same thing for your party
what the fuck are those letters trying to say
Play 3d6 games
>Getting a drink
...
Fuck off to Tanelorn, RPG hipster
They finally beat the captcha
Is this going to be a thing now
Thanks buddy.
Yeah I've learned to ignore such idiocy. If the majority of players enjoy the system and it's gimmicks then that means the system is at least half decent no matter how much you cry that it's worse then FATAL.