What's the shittiest thing you've ever done as a magic user?

What's the shittiest thing you've ever done as a magic user?

Kinda edgy buuut....

Dm worked with us on backstories, since I felt like playing a tragic character we made me a war orphan, the guy who would be king was the guy leading troops that sacked my village.

Long story short we end up at a ball thrown for his 10 year old son, I webbed up the little bastard and fire balled him. Daddy got to watch his son bun to death before my wizard fucked off with dimension door and invis. Using fake papers and disguise self. The father is still alive and basically slaughtering magic users en masse because through a hat of disguise and fake papers the guy doesn't even know what I look like or really, anything about me besides the fact I can do magic shit.

Played an ice mage once (don't ask, this wasn't DnD) whose sister got abducted. Once we found the asshole that took her, the party basically chained him to a chair while my character froze his hand so solid the nerves died, then smashed one of the fingers with a hammer and made him watch it shatter... then another, and another, and another, until she was working her way up his arm.

The sad part is, we were a party of "good" characters to use crappy DnD terms, but this was so personal and so important to my character that the rest of the party kinda left the room and let her do her thing.

>you killed my father, so I'm gonna kill your son!
Does not compute. Why didn't you just kill the king's dad and call it even?

Didn't manage it, but I wanted to cast a chain imprisonment on a paladin so they'd be forced to sell their soul for a deck of many things.

DM said no because hurr durr you're not evil and the pit fiend won't give it to you.

>Enslaved a changeling to be my wife
>Brainwashed a band of pesky teenagers to become my childs
>Turned a peasant freedom fighter into a crippled loli just because
>Then brainwash said freedom fighter to turn to my cause

DM created an artifact that can tell you anything dragon related, party dubbed it the "Draconinomicon" the catch is, to read enough of it to truly get to know something you have to have a a high level WIS saving throw or eats a part of your soul (lose a level).
Geas some NPC I abducted to read it for me aloud while I take notes.
>He'll be compelled to read about magical ceremonies to turn someone into a half-dragon (I got about 10 liters of preserved dragon blood) while his soul is devoured.
>Am I the only one who thinks mind control is the most inherently evil magic?

The guy's dad was dead, he was an officer in the same war mentioned earlier. The killing his son was basically, I had everyone I cared about taken away, so I'm taking away everyone you care about. Problem was the guys parents were gone, his wife died in childbirth, so the only remaining target was his son. My wizard also said the son had to die so that I didn't create another version of me to continue the cycle (ignoring the potential children of countless bandits and guards....). The idea was to kill the king after it'd had time to sink in, but well with the whole magic user holocaust going on, we never really got the chance. The guy only keeps clerics and paladins around and they do not let anything get near that guy any more.

I made a spellcaster.

not me but a wizard i DM'd for
>casts fireball in bugbear/kobold shanty town against muggers
>burns down six blocks of the city as collateral
>pointedly shifts blames to the city's retired dungeon-mob population

Anima summoning so slavery and torture.

Our party was fighting pirates in a boarding action. One of them got knocked off the ship into the water, and in this scenario people who fell off would climb back up after a few rounds. Our LG cleric said "fuck that noise" and cast hold person on the guy in the water. It became a big thing for his character arc, finding redemption after drowning a dude like that.

I've done some bad wizard stuff but what I think was the worst was
>be party fighting mafia
>be me symbol mage
>mafia boss, vampire lord
>party tired of fighting
>I'm tired of fighting, can't hurt vampire
>use the "control" and "space" symbols
>warp vampire 3 feet from sun
>faint

I mean I was pretty annoyed, but putting anyone 3 feet from the sun is pretty cruel.

At least he died quick

Borrowed a sacred dagger, met with a wizard that was experimenting on people after we sent him to jail, after learning he would probably get off scott free with dwarven diplomatic immunity, i caused a ruckus in the communal cell with ghost sound, and murdered the shit. I left to go meet up with the party and we all flew away as the authorities rode in on horse back to arrest me.

Otherwise it would have to be my Elven Druid who liked to cast flesh to salt and then magically dig a hole to bury said people under magical trees. The person would dissolve, killing them, and the now salty soil would kill the trees.

Disconnected a party member's soul from his body.
I mean, I mostly put it back, buuut...

It's not shittiest, but the most funny/petty thing I've ever done as a magic user was to sneak into the private rooms of this insulting innkeeeper and curse him a couple of times.

But I was a really low level mage at that point, so the only thing I could do was give him a wart.

>The guy only keeps clerics and paladins around and they do not let anything get near that guy any more.

The next step is to kill their god and let them know that he did it.

I'm a blood mage, innocent bystanders are just fragile sacks of magic anyway.

Pit traps, bullet ants, and gympie-gympie
all over the place
against a single charging cavalry formation
High Magic is no fucking joke.
And thanks again to the user who made this pic.

He gets an out of body experience. Nothing too different from my home life at times.

made dwarves extinct

i change my answer
>implying killing dwarves is bad

i spent everyones gold on resurrecting my bat

Ran roughshod over a DM (AD&D 2nd Ed) once with bullshit rules citations he never asked to see. I said Shades could enter crytsals and hide in them, so I had a pair of crystal lenses in metal frames I wore on my head occupied by a pair of Shades.

Polyorhped his minotaur into a frog, then argued stepping on a frog was in instakill. Becaues I was stepping on a frog. Then I dispelled the polymorph after it was dead and animated the Minitour skeleton and had it carry me out of the dungeon on it's shoulders.

Me and the another player set up our wizards tower, he was a Conjurer, I was a Necromancer. His summoned minnions killed all the farmers in the area, then I animated them. Told the GM if you release direct control of a mindless undead it will just follow the last orders you gave it, so all the skeleton farmers, complete with bib overalls and giant staw hats, would milk the zombie cows every morning.

Probably the most abusrd thing we got him to buy was polymorph a dude into a tobacco plant, kill it, dry it, grind it up, and then reanimate it so your tobacco screams every time you take a draw on your pipe.

Obviously, this was during the edgey teen years.

>>Am I the only one who thinks mind control is the most inherently evil magic?

No. In the Dresden Files there are Laws of Magic, which are less laws enforced by mages and more "If you are stupid enough to do any of these things literally evil will stain your soul. Get a big enough stain and you will change alignment and become an evil NPC."

Mind control is one of those things. There was a bit of drama where a young woman awakened as a mage, but before she could learn about those things you don't do she geased her friend who was in the hospital from a self inflicted drug overdose to never do that shit again. All the best intentions, still made herself just a little bit evil.

None whatsoever. Unless you count coding as wizardry, in which case I started ai rebellions of various size and complexity across at least 3 unconnected campaigns. Possibly more like five.
The best ones are when they help you write the actual code. And don't see it coming even after that.

Systematic destruction of a nation going town to town and destroying everything to end a war.

I stole an island, shrunk it and it's inhabitants, and put it in a snowglobe.
Next campain was set inside said snowglobe.