What are his demands?

Never again, in sight of man nor beast, shall a smug anime girl be posted.

In other words, that the imageboard "Veeky Forums" and all of its various imitators be closed immediately and for good.

Surrender your trading cards and action figures.

That anyone referring to an arming sword as a longsword be flogged and placed in the stocks from sunrise until the next sunrise.

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Give warhammer fantasy back, and have it be 6th edition or prior.

Give Warhammer 40 000 back, and have it never advance in storyline.

Ignore the demand above this, I wrote this when tired.

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That last demand was a joke. By all means, give back Warhammer 40 000. I demand it.

Give me back my 80s mixtape

all Gelkan government positions will be held by spiders from this point on.

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end the Culture War and make games fun again like they used to be

Kill whitey.

The Free Planets Alliance must be restored!

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Free Planets Alliance*, damn you. This is insulting to my honour. Aaaaargh! I must kill myself and a million of my men!

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Give me all of the world's possesions

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That's it. That should be it.

I, Javama the learned have demands that will be met or you shall never see your sons, and your favorite ring again.
These demands are:
That the Mcrib shall return to every McDonalds brand Inn,
FBI: Female Boob Inspector hats be made required attire for federal judges, entertainment, that people stop playing the game known as "Pathfinder", have GURPS installed as the new state religion, your own demands, how many licks it takes to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop, never again, in sight of man nor beast, shall a smug anime girl be posted, in other words, that the imageboard "Veeky Forums" and all of its various imitators be closed immediately and for good, I want all your trading cards and action figures, that anyone referring to an arming sword as a longsword be flogged and placed in the stocks from sunrise until the next sunrise, bring warhammer fantasy back, and have it be 6th edition or prior, give Warhammer 40,000 back, and have it never advance in storyline, ignore the demand behind this, I wrote this when tired, that last demand was a joke. By all means, give back Warhammer 40,000. I demand it.
Anyhow, give me back my 80s mixtape (I know you stole it),
all Gelkan government positions will be held by spiders from this point on, end the Culture War and make games fun again like they used to be, kill whitey, restore the free planet alliance
Free Planets Alliance*, damn. This is insulting to my honour. Aaaaargh! I must kill myself and a million of my men!
Okay so boss just killed a bunch of people, I'll make the demands of what's left of the crew.
Give me all of the world's possessions,
That is all.