Field Kit Inspection: Volcano Insurance Edition

Form up, neat and orderly, lads! On the double!

Men, I've got some bad news for you all. Rather than being sent to the front lines, to assist in pushing back the foul heretic forces entrenched upon this world. We're instead being shipped to investigate more pressing matters.

As of twenty-four hours ago, a nearby research outpost, that our Mechanicus friends set up, has gone silent, and we're being sent to investigate.

I should warn you all to dress lightly. As we shall be heading inside of an active volcano for this one. And before anyone asks; no, you cannot bring the ingredients to make s'mores with you! Our job is to investigate the place, not bloody enjoy ourselves!

>Welcome to ''Field Kit Inspection", home of the 'Unknown Regiment". Feel free to join in! Remember though, we tend to use spoilers for OOC chat, while greentexts for are used for describing a character's actions. D20s are for combat checks and d100s for other things you wish to roll, with higher being better.

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I here,I here protect

THANK YOU VERY MUCH MAJOR!
WHILST I DONT THINK I WILL BE CHANGING OUT OF MY ROBES, I AM OFFERING A REWARD FOR INFORMATION REGARDING THE VALKYRIE THEFT THAT HAPPENED A SHORT WHILE AGO.

Sir I'm ready for battle!

>Chainsword and Bolt pistol in hand, scowls and attempts to organize his squad.

*sigh*I'm ready

angry priest man called you cheerleader,what is cheerleader

It's uhhh, a person who cheers people up, I think

A CHEERLEADER IS A WOMAN SENT DOWN TO RAISE MORALE BY PERFORMING ONE OF MANY INSPIRING DANCES!
SHE IS OFTEN EMBARRASSED BY IT THOUGH, SO SHE PRETENDS TO NOT BE ONE.

oh goody,you make me feel happy cuz you good person!
we you speak loud priest man

>Fussing over his squad, double and triple checks that their Rebreathers are in place.

Speaking of the Valkyire incident, Micheal-

>Matthias would have two men grab hold of Micheal by the arms, before Matthias himself would slap a cold metal collar around his neck. A loud *click*, signifying it has locked into place around his neck.

-Until such a time as the investigation has been fully concluded, and the charges have been dropped. I have been informed by divisional command, that you are to wear an explosive collar at all times. Any attempts to tamper with, or remove it, will be cause for the collar to explode, and kill you. Any attempt to disobey orders given to you, will be cause for the collar to explode as well. Do you understand, Micheal?

As expected of a Praetorian!

>Matthias would nod his head.

Keep close, and quiet when we get there. And so not go around touching and stealing boots.

buts boots
>the bullgryn looks sad

VERY WELL MAJOR, HOWEVER I WILL NOT ACCEPT ANY RESTRICTIONS PLACED UPON MY COMMAND UNTIL SUCH TIME AS THE INVESTIGATION IS CONCLUDED.

WHILE I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION, WOULD YOU CONSIDER DONATING TO THE HOSPITALIERS MEDICAL FUND?

Oh course sir, who else but us?
>He gives a salute

>Meanwhile, at the Legion of Do- *AHEM!*, - deep within volcano itself, at the Mechanicus outpost!
>Loud, angry, and impatient thumping noises are heard inside of a room filled with massive logic engines. These thumping noises, are followed by the sounds of goas being smashed, and logic engines being broken and shot apart, out of sheer boredom.

Don't let him get to you, here.
>She places down a pair of boots
>She begins to giggle

>Jim would walk up to Major Wyvern, with his giant slabshield and grenadier gauntlet

Hello sir, reporting for duty!

WOULD YOU LIKE TO DONATE NOBLE SORORITAS?
AFTER ALL, ITS THE FAILURE OF MEDICAL STAFF THAT HAS LEAD TO YOUR PROSTHETICS!

You're not wrong there Mikey
>the man drops 5 thrones into the shekel bucket

Micheal, you are where as an advisor, and spiritual leader for the regiment. Do not forget that.

>He flashes the older man a warm smile, whilst returning his salute.

Of course, Private.

>Matthias would way his finger at the bullgryn. Speaking as if he were dealing with a misbehaving toddler.

No touching anything unless it attacks you!

I guess you are right for once
>She throws five thrones at his bucket

OF COURSE, I KNOW MY PLACE, IT IS AS ALL OTHER NOBLE HEROES OF THE IMPERIUM, AS WITH ALL TRUE LOYALISTS. AT THE EMPERORS SIDE IN DEATH!

BUT WOULD YOU LIKE TO DONATE?

>Matthias, despite being approached by the massive abhuman, would flash him a smile.

Another one? I'm surprised they would send us so many of you.

>Matthias would flash the creature a salute.

Pleasure to have you aboard.

Matthias... may I ask why you're the one giving the briefing?
>she tightens the straps on her gas mask

So...when are we going? Can't keep them waiting for us now can we?

Okie dokie major person man

Sadly, the new Commissar is busy dealing with the recent aftermath of a certain incident, involving a stolen Valkyrie.

She had also mentioned something about needing to cleanse her room of heretics? I'm not entirely sure.

We'll be leaving shortly, private.

>A man in heavily clad armour would walk in to where everyone was congregating. He would be armed with a giant explosive launcher, and an omnispex. Upon looking towards the regiment, he would open his helmet, showing his real face. His face would hold bright blue eyes and a firm brow. His hair would be a light brown.

>The man would stand at about 6ft 8, and would be fairly well built. He would smile upon looking towards the rest of the regiment

So! When do we go on mission?

BOOTS,you best person Belasya
>he hugs the Eldar once again

WE SHOULD LEAVE THIS VERY INSTANT, THE LONGER WE WAIT THE MORE THE HERETICAL FILTH MULTIPLY!

>Quietly, admits a sense of foreboding, as if something terrible will happen if they are not there to stop it.

>Requests to lead his squad ahead.

I assume she took her aid with her.
>she pulls the datapad from his hands and starts reading as she walks around him
Hmmm... volcano base... Redacted redacted redacted...
>taps quickly on it
I hate these records...

Guys this is not the place for quests, please fuck off to quest.

You'd think it was a penal soldier's bar code, with the amount of redacted and blacked out writing was on it.

>He would take his dataslate back from his wife.

And ask next time. Your my bloody Adjutant, not a child.

Sergeant Wolfe what's the situation
Is the volcano about to explode

>O'niell would be sitting in the corner making nail bombs and other makeshift explosives almost compulsively

If it's the volcano base I'm thinking of they were making a time rift thing maket

>Matthias would raise a curious brow to the large, armor clad man. But would say nothing about it.

We'll be leaving now. So get ready to start walking. It's a ten kilometer walk until we get there.
>Matthias would level his hellgun upon his shoulder, before walking towards the bases main gate, and out into the rocky wastes.

>Michael and his guard retinue would follow, loud obnoxious chanting easily heard from it as prayers to the emperor filled the air

>Calling out to his squad, makes to follow the Major.

I am walk good,can walk good,lets walk

>Barrington and his team of snipers begin to follow them

>Belasya takes her power-speak and begins to follow Major
>She's bumbling under her breath

>Sean would fit on his beret, then clasping his beret and stash of makeshift bombs

>the vox chirps
Sergeant Vu Chen reporting in, sir. Reconnaissance suggests that the mechanicus facility operates using geothermal power harvested from the volcano. I'm not sure how it works exactly but the base is suspended over the volcano's opening by massive girders.

Do you like walk Belasya, I like walk,the Boot men dont yell at me when i walk,but its okay cuz they dead now

Oh, like in a Jameus Bodeus film?

It's alright I guess

>It would take nearly an hour for the group to cross the barren, magma filled wastes outside of the imperial guard HQ. The terrain often hampering their efforts towards the massive volcano that held the Mechanicus research outpost.
>The volcano itself was massive indeed. With magma leaking of various holes carved into the cliffs, as well as over the very rim itself.
>One tunnel however, would still be opened up, and clear of burning magma.

..I suppose that's our way in...

Vu Chen! Take your squad, and scout the entrance. The rest if us will follow suite a shortly.

>Sean would begin the long march towards the enemy

youtube.com/watch?v=yaS3vaNUYgs

Okie Dokie,what are we walking for anyways

Which one ?
Live to let die ?

A mechanicus outpost

>Pistol drawn, cautions his squad to stay alert.

Rolled 8 (1d100)

Is there anything unusual you saw?
>Barrington would use benoculars to spot any danger lurking within

Okie Dokie,Maybe they can give me boots

No, I think he means the one with Spectral. Where the heretics use an inactive volcano as their lair, and launch ships into orbit to capture rogue traders.

I wonder if my credentials still work

I'll give them after the mission

Rolled 90 (1d100)

>O'Niell would get into position, beginning to scout the entrance

YAY! I love boots,boots are great

I thought this vulcano is active, like any other in here

Oh yeah that one
It was kinda mediocre

No, it's Heretic with the Golden Bolter
They exterminatus his evil volcano lair and the explosion goes right into the core and rips the world in half.
My cousin was an extra, he was a guardsman that was hit by a chimera. It wasn't scripted but they kept it in anyway.

Not suprising considering safety procedures in the Imperium

GOOD IDEA PRIEST, YOU WILL BE INSTRUMENTAL IN UNWRAVELING WHAT HAS HAPPENED AT THIS OUTPOST!

`What safety procedures

Exactly

Okie Dokie

>Scouting out what would appear to be the only usable entrance into the volcano itself. The scout team would find the tunnel (big enough for two Leman russes to enter into, side by side) to have been crafted by tools, rather than the passage of time.
>Making their way inside. They would find many smaller, far narrower tunnels, that would branch off and lead into dozens of far smaller passage ways.
>Should they follow the main route, the scout team would eventually come across a vast, metal door, big enough for a Mechanicus dune crawler to make its way through.
>Surrounding the massive door, would be the broken and mangled bodies of nearly two dozen Skittari warriors and half dozen tech adepts, along with a half dozen broken up automated turret emplacements.
>From the look of things, whatever caused this, was wielding some sort of power weapon.

Rolled 67 (1d100)

Well let me input my credentials
Rank: Magos
Name: Gelt
Ordos: Reductor
Forge World: Cyclosrathe
> rolling for success for credentials recognition

people died me think

>Other than the corpses, and broken defense turrets, there doesn't appear to be any danger leading up to the main door.

Alright... Volunteers on who's going first?

>The door access panel would shine bright red, and shock the Magos.
>In bright blue letters, the panel would state. "ACCESS DENINED!"

I nominate Viktor. I'm p-pretty sure he has the most heat shielding *cough* out of all of us.

WE SHALL, ONWARD TO VICTORY MAN, FOR THE EMPEROR!

>Matthias would enter into the area, a few seconds after the first attempt to gain access had been made.

Quite the battle here... Shame they didn't seem to hit anything. I guess their targeting auspexes we're misaligned...

Rolled 34 + 5 (1d100 + 5)

Hold on trying again
> pulls out rossete
Rank: interrogator
Name: Gelt
Ordos: Malleus
Home world: ???
> rolling take two

they should have aimed harder

>A mechanical voice answers, yet clearly with enough emotion to not be a servitor.

The doors are sealed. You and your Heretic filth will need to find a different fortress to raid, Iron Warriors.

I nominate you, you're too hopped up to feel pain

Hmm, try turning it on and off.
So whoever it was knows a lot about technology mayhaps

Rolled 77 (1d100)

>Looking about, attempts to inspect the corpses for anything unusual.

Where did you got that rosette ?

>steve attempts to open the door by smacking it and headbutting it

Rolled 51 (1d100)

Oh well that sounds bad. Lemme try
Viktor Morvos, Chief Administrator Rank 65 Nevidia Administratum... uhh... Health and Safety inspection?

>The moment he attempted to use his Inquisition access codes, the panel would flash red, and immediately shock him to such an extent, that his arm would power down.
>The panel would flash a message onto the screen.
>No flesh bag Inquisitors allowed! Stop trying to steal all our good stuff!

Rolled 18 (1d20)

rolling failed

Rolled 53 (1d100)

i am not functioning today

Rolled 12 (1d20)

THIS DOOR IRRITATES ME!
OPEN THE FUCK UP DOOR!
>Michael would carve it open with his eviscerator
THE PASSWORD IS DIE!

>Matthias would make his way up to the door panel.

This is Major Matthias Wyvern, of the Unknown Regiment. We're attached to the Exolos Crusade. Identify yourself.

Oh for f-fuck's sake, let me try.
>the sergeant hammers on the door with his fist
This is the Guard! Open up! We've already shot up the Iron Warriors!

Regiment here? Ah you're the ones that the assistance request was sent to!

Thank the omnissiah you have arrived.

I'm Archmagos Xenologos Depherius Magnus. Albeit my colleagues call me Depherion.

The door controls are a bit clumsy, the machine spirits have been forced but-

Omnissiah's mercy tell him to stop doing that!

But im helping

>Having just now noticed the bullgryn's mischief, Matthias would yell out

Emperor's throne! Steve! Stop that!

ok,i was trying to help

>Matthias would nod his head.

Understood. We'll give you a few moments to open the door for us.

There, there maybe they will appreciate your help later