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Eerie CYOA edition.
I've been looking through my yet-to-be-sorted CYOA folder and came upon the newest version of Dream of Genie. If you're familiar with it, the setting has some extremely disturbing undertones; so, in this thread, I'd like to get a discussion going (if possible) about exactly what "Broken Facade" is.
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>I'd like to get a discussion going (if possible) about exactly what "Broken Facade" is.
It's left up to the reader to decide, is what the author says.
Uncensored Version:
drive.google.com
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Get out of here Tok
Uncensored Version:
drive.google.com
Reposting my (somewhat stale) OC
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The author made a big writeup about the setting and everything in it and how it works, someone can post it for you if they have it.
EXPANSION
I have crossed the great beyond, achieved all that is possible and impossible. There is no mountain unclimbed, path unwalked, sea unsailed. I have risen above Olympus Mons, above the spires of Mars. I have sank below the oceans of Jupiter, into lightless depths. I have skimmed the surface of the Sun, through solar storms. I have settled the galaxy and united all beings. I have built the greatest and largest particle accelerator. I have unified physics and mastered science. I have opened the walls between space and travelled beyond the reach of light. I have disturbed the sleeping Gods and escaped the very universe. I have done it all and you will not remember me. Farewell.
You did this what, four times? Just GTFO or shut up.
This would be fantastic actually
from the last thread.
>All those pages being spread out because of other posts
Autism: Triggered
Not this timeline, child.
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> mfw 4chin doesnt let you post for another x seconds right after posting
Shit like that is why I generally started the threads I made with a one-pager.
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well the middle option no longer matters so the gold, even if exchanging it is going to be a bitch and a half
HL3
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>the middle option no longer matters
Gabe Newell would still ascend to the Invisible Clergy and hell would freeze over though
Closeted has the most story potential.
I will stick with gamer bro for now.
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You have a crush on Tok or something? Why do you keep bothering him?
user, I need you to tell me what sort of waifus you want in this.
Husbandos are fine too.
N-no?
Cute and/or sexy ones. With tig ol' bitties.
At least have the courtesy to put your name on when you talk about yourself, Tok.
does he really deserve that
How unsightly. Don't post WIPs, son. Don't.
traps.
busty girls with short hair.
t h i c c girls.
bara men.
... this picture is just weapons-grade smug.
>Use your name, you namefag
I always do and that's not me, I'm just well liked.
Anyways, this thread could use more Nemesis.
ones with good feet
The yous keep are what keep me going user. I have a problem
Stop right there.
Hahah, I'm posting WIPs!
If you didn't write like a 12-year old, I'd believe you.
Bishie otters PLS
>what sort of waifus you want in this.
"evil" witch who would much rather just live a quite life
bonus points for her being an elf
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HAHAHAHHAHAHAAAAA. Look at me GUYSSSSS I'M BEING FUNnY AND IRONIC XDDDD
>Monster Girl
100
>Huge
100
>Serpentine
100
>Animal
100
>Ornamental Horns
96
>Wise Mien (Free)
96
>Fanged Maw
92
>Engulfing Maw
90
>Weaving Tail
86
>Coiling Tail (Free)
86
>Spelltongue
80
>Toxicity
76
>Mimicry
73
>Aura
70
>Aureola
66
>Overdrive
63
>Regeneration
57
>Extra Magic (x4)
37
>Extra Speed (x1)
32
>Fire Control
27
>Water Control
23
>Earth Control
18
>Wind Control
14
>Ice Control
11
>Lightning Control
8
>Spellsoul
0
>Freedom
Power 8
Magic 9
Speed 5
>be wise, mysterious creature living far from civilization
>adventurers seek me out for my wisdom and magical abilities
>don't share my powers for free, always charge a fitting price
>eat those who don't pay
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A mage fueling her magic with her own pain.
It's OK, you don't have to post the rest.
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Did someone say WIPs?
I think someone said WIPs.
why couldnt you keep your work at this quality? why did it become shit?
>It's OK, you don't have to post the rest.
I'm not a quitter!
It's okay, Imaginos. Once you actually make some OC, people will side with you.
>why couldnt you keep your work at this quality? why did it become shit?
You mean lewd right? Well my penis has a mind of its own.
Well I promised I'd post something today, so here's the half-dragon remake I started on about a year ago.
I haven't finished the companions yet because I wasn't happy with how they were turning out, but they'll be back in the next update. I promise you wont have to wait as long for the update as you did for this.
I'll be in the thread for a bit, so ask me stuff while I'm here. Also, there was zero balance testing for this piece of garbage so go nuts.
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Your penis is a sad little thing.
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>You mean lewd right?
no, i mean lazy and low quality- lewd prison was good
that bully CYOA was not
My dick wants one thing but the powergamer in me wants another
very visually impressive user, good job.
>The bully CYOA is shit
Well, reddit liked it.
Ewww.
Typos aside, it's looking good.
Form-related decisions (from Form Shifting and Cosemetics [sic]) are one-time-only, correct?
What would an abstract affinities breath do? Like a Love dragon. Would they breathe something that causes love?
>reddit liked it
and? it was low quality from a technical aspect, uninspired and in general seemed to be just the bonus part of lewd prison but less interesting and dragged out for an entire CYOA
im not sure ive seen all your work, but you have had some good ones -nemesis/LSP (and captured if were being generous)
some meh ones - mind slaver
and now some shit ones- the end/ bully
HAHAHAHA
You can't fucking make this up, holy shit!
Judging by their taste in general ... that wouldn't mean much, even if we cared about their opinion.
>nemesis/LSP
Those were terrible, though. Only children would find these things appealing, although I'm not entirely surprised that people here fit that bin.
>For Ohters actually lets you pay with your loved ones far a success on a mission
kek
>ask me stuff
Who's your favorite author?
>nemesis
the premise is stupid and the "lol metahumor" is retarded- but theres enough options to allow for imaginative builds, the art is nice and its fun enough- the combo mechanic is also interesting
>LSP
i admit this is partially my fetish talking, but its decent enough looking and has once again many options.
>Genie
Linger
>History
No Good Deed
>Attitude
Defiant
>Body
Curvy
Cute
>Accessories
Motherly face
Barefoot
Cat Ears
>Additional Outfits
Sporty
Traditional
Witch
>Mundane Skills
Warrior
Ruler
Scheherazade
>Vessel Exterior
Brass Lamp (with pocket dimension upgrade)
>Vessel Interior
Pocket Dimension
>Powerlevel
Magical Girlfriend
>Perks
Magical Realm
Lusty Soul
Giant
World Atlas
Dream Job
Minor Psychis Link
Djinn-Ja
Friend Upstairs
Cursebane
Jacob's Ladder
Intoxicating Aroma
Illusionary Copy
Foresight
Loves Letters
Spare Changes (Modern Outfit)
>Pitfalls
Mischievous Mind
Turbulent Mood
>Interloopers
Psycho Childhood Friend
Old Friend
>Life Goal
Novelty
I'll admit that taking a defiant lusty giant genie who hates my guts and is mischievous probably isn't the best idea, but I like a challenge. Besides, if things do go wrong there's always the old friend who can imprison her or my childhood psycho friend who can free me.
I want a little sister-fu.
If you find it fun, I really don't know what to tell you. It's just blatant power tripping with no purpose, something edgy preteens think up of when they get excessively bullied in secondary school. Half the powers are "Do this, but better!" It's the epitome of terrible creativity and an insult to anyone who calls them self a creator.
What's "LSP"?
>metal
>non-classical element
en.wikipedia.org
lewd super prison
i find it fun because it has such a wide variety of skills/abilities and possible combinations
is the "you do X but better" thing good? no
is making a build in spite of that interesting? enough to be worthwhile imo
>half the powers are "do this, but better"
which kinda amusingly isnt enough to do its designated purpose, since its relatively mild powerlevelwise in the big scheme of things
You've got to admit that this one was his first work and you're allowed to make some beginner mistakes. He's got an alibi for that one. But he keeps repeating the shit instead of learning and improving.
>lewd super prison
It's just "Super Prison CYOA", though.
Yeah, I like to think it's a tiny bit better looking than the original. Just a smidge.
Yes it's one time only, of course there are ways of cheating it a little depending on your choices. The typos are to be expected, this was INCREDIBLY rushed. I would love for anyone to point out as many as they could.
It's supposed to be destructive, so I imagine a blast that would break your target's heart. Literally or figuratively.
I'm going to name three:
Quietanon because he's supported me many times, a few times he didn't even know it was me. He's alright in my book.
Highlander because I was actually confused with how nice he was, and that he seemingly ignored my provocations. My current belief is that he's too pure for this place. I am annoyed that my special snowflake experimental character got into Traveller, while my actual build died horribly, so I'll take points off for that.
Pallas. No real reason, but we have a lot of the same patterns and I just find it hilarious.
Submissive Oni tomboy tallgirl Monk.
>But he keeps repeating the shit instead of learning and improving
Because there is zero creativity involved with creating the CYOA. It's all basic shit you see in all forms of fiction, crammed into one CYOA, "but better." I'm unsurprised he's now in a stump for creating anything fresh or new because he lacks creativity as a person.
>What's "LSP"?
Lumpy Space Princess
There is danger ahead. But do not be afraid. For I am with you like breath itself. Darkness
will lead to light - colour will bleed into the night. Beautiful colours, the like of which you
have never seen. Let the dream of confusion lead you into the virgin light! Be gone! Be
all-seeing, be brave...Be gone!
>t's all basic shit you see in all forms of fiction
true- but that doesent make those things bad the first time
its the fact he never got better which sucks
>I haven't finished the companions yet
stopped reading
Submissive, loyal, genki Red-Oni tomboy tallgirl Monk.
>true- but that doesent make those things bad the first time
It makes it terrible, actually. It's pretty much the McDonalds of CYOA making: no care for quality and made to cater to children. Blatant wish fulfillment for the purpose of jerking yourself off.
I'm not saying you shouldn't enjoy it user. By all means, what you do at your desk is of no concern to me, but at least acknowledge its place.
You might want to tweak the prerequisite system, so that you could get two standard affinities without having to buy the nonstandard and conceptual upgrades, sense magic without perfecting other senses, or remove the need to eat and drink without buying immortality.
I'm not entirely sure how you'd want to do this, though; the two ways I can think of are some sort of visual notation distinguishing prerequisites and standalone options or just adding the cost of lower-tiered options to the higher-tier ones and removing prerequisites entirely.
"I want to make babies with her. Think of them - great big monsters. They'd conquer the world."
Bully: Olivia
Mixed School
Boons: Mansion, Guardian Angel, Power of Love, (8)
Bullying: Degradation, No Escape, Impregnation, Yandere, Home Cooked Meal, Light Beating (-6)
This is a great CYOA for subs. I think you can figure out how this all fits together...
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Yandere doesn't seem like it'd be compatible with pervert test, and less compatible with cuckquean, sorta.
I really appreciate that you wrote the bully characters instead of having the player build them; though I noticed you went easy on your tg censored version and didn't crop/find sfw images for your options.
Still; I really like this one!
I wish you guys would be nicer to each other.
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Fuck you
>Blatant wish fulfillment
at the core of it that is 99.99999% of CYOA's
having generic powers is no less inherently bad than not having those generic powers and instead having weird shit
being able to be a human, dwarf or elf isnt worse than being a Elu'rian, catfolk or murlok
the issue with generic shit is that eventually it all becomes the same, since the choices become available in so many different CYOA that they lose distinctiveness - which is the issue with Toks lewd CYOA's
but as it stands nemesis isnt that bad on its own, if you look at it next to other things like domain master and whatnot its flaws are easier to see, but in a vacuum (which is what its normally posted in) its perfectly adequate
now where would the fun in that be
>Nemesis is shit
>TokHaar is shit
>TokHaar has no creativity
>He's in a stump for creating anything new.
You're tsundereing is quite cute and it amuses me that you squabble with my fans and try and explain to them why my CYOAs are bad. Your persistence greatly entertains me.
Nemesis is good because it has fun and unique mechanics and allows for interesting and diverse builds. It's a mechanic heavy CYOA just like most of my CYOAs. Your CYOAs are mechanic light at best, its funny because you seem to be agitated by other CYOAs which are mechanic heavy. Like a lack of understanding why people likes them which leads to you being frustrated and talking shit about those CYOAs. It's like mechanics are something your mind can't grasp. You don't even grade CYOAs on mechanics on your little CYOA grading sheet on excel. Visual design, story telling and world building is not everything in CYOAs. Lewdness and mechanics are important, a lewd CYOA which makes your dick hard can be just as good or even better then a visually impressive CYOA with amazing world building and story.
me too, user
What if all those namefags weren't such actual fags?
>But they make OC
As you can see some of them are borderline autistic and if they weren't there, other people would take their place.