CYOA General

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When did they take away deleting your own thread? I'm feeling pretty embarrassed right now...

Full cyoa when?

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Hey, that's pretty good.

Reposting this because I want attention.

Also, a breakdown of the sheer amount of typos in this piece of garbage would be appreciated.

Update before heat death I swear.

this cyoa just exists for "I'll impregnate the bitch" jokes, doesn't it

Hey, this is also pretty good.

Why does every cyoa have to be this sprawling, multi image affair?
Some of the best cyoa images have been simple as fuck.

because the people here have seen thousands of cyoas by now and are bored of the little ones

>Flatland

>Curtain/high walls

>Arrowslits, machicolations, boiling pots

>moat

I feel like they're going to have a pretty shitty time of this one. Especially if I make the moat perfectly angled, and only half fill it with water.

Combine that with the higher than usual walls and their only option will be to try and cross the bridge... or siege, but that prevents its own problems for them.

Overall I like this cyoa, good job. If I may suggest, add some drawbacks for extra $$$, and also some option like

>extra storage

or something, so you'll also be able to better prepare for dealing with sieges.

Does anyone have the latest version of Battlemage?

no

People like to put effort into their creations, user.

A full-effort from Tok would be objectively shittier than a zero-effort from SDA.

Then eat this wizard dick

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Bronn would oddly love this CYOA for obvious reasons.

a full effort from tok is objectively shitty no matter what, so that's not really fair

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Not looking forward to the update of this to be honest. It looks like stat bloat out the ass with something like 20 different stats to keep track off. The original was bad enough in that regard.

If the author is around, I say just cut out the stats entirely. You might find the CYOA easier to finish and it will be much better.

That's true, both objectively and subjectively. SDA made a lewd cyoa and it looked better than anything the self proclaimed 'god of lewd cyoas' has made.

Tok wouldn't be so bad if he had some self awareness and acknowledge he's the cheap fast food equivalent of the CYOA world

>still waiting for catgirls
>still waiting for yuri
>don't remember the last time I saw Strife around

Do you just spend your life here waiting for CYOAs? Go play a videogame or watch some television, user.

>Tiers are culmulative
Then how does tier 3 wings cost 8 when it add up to 7?

Rosanon here. Comp keeps BSODing for no reason and I am scared to death that if I work on it my data's going to be erased like last time.

Putting effort doesn't necessarily mean being needlessly wordy, like many recent CYOAs are.

Nah actually I've missed several threads lately, I've been too busy reading. I only skimmed the last thread a bit. Glad to know my thinly veiled inquiry as to if either of those CYOAs are out yet worked.

Shit, best of luck. Try popping your HD in another rig to backup the data? Or if that's not an option, get a boot disc OS.

I think the original was better. Even just the first page by itself. I much prefer the "accidental encounter" setup rather than "my family is really wizards", it's just that much more believable, plus I think the narrator comes off as less dumb. That, and it's more options with the same point pool. Even if Tier 2 is technically as powerful as the tier 2 version of the old CYOA it feels like you are getting less.

Posting the rest.

I had to go digging in the Pastebin google drives. It turned out the version I had saved was very old (didn't have the drawbacks on page 1).

>Glad to know my thinly veiled inquiry as to if either of those CYOAs are out yet worked.
N-nani?!

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Kukla

Stat Augment 1 -Str

Life Augment 1

Body Augment 1

Radiant Lotus

Scholar. Supernatural

Etching 9
Etching 13

Aura Mirror
Aura Chain
Aura Form

STR 3
CON 4
DEX 9
AGI 8
CHA 4
MAG 10
RES 3

Aura Form lasts 50 minutes per use
Aura Chain lasts 250 minutes per use (+25 if used in aura form)
Aura mirror lasts 2.5 minutes per use (+15 seconds in aura form)

I think I am pretty well set to go investigating these evil shenanigans.

If they were already out, I'd look like a retard but I'd get to see them. Since they aren't, I know I'm still waiting. And even better, as Rosanon spoke up, I know it's probably going to be a while for yuri. I actually thought it was a bit more transparent than I suppose it actually was.

I don't know why you don't just check the pastebin, user.

I'm tired. I just spent 4 hours designing a fucking box.

>-8 Timeless 2
Mandatory
>-6 Form Shifting 2
>Mandatory
>-2 Cosmetics 2
>Always
>-13 Magic 3
And for the one remaining point I can either buy Cosmetics 3 or Senses 1. Claws would be kind of pointless all things considered.

>-8 timeless 2
Still mandatory, still the same cost thankfully
>-2 Form Change
4 points cheaper to maintain human form
>-8 Magic 2
5 points cheaper. Maybe the new version magic 3 is stronger, but when I'm maxed out either way that's not what it feels like

12 points left after buying essentially the same thing, now we get to have some fun. I'm going to skip the "drawbacks" section just to keep things in parity, but given the companions section I would probably add Draconic Drive normally
>-2 Draconic Grace 1
>-6 Improved Wings 2
>-3 Strength 1
1 unspendable point, pity that. Still, I've got a decent all-around physical build with great magic.

I am a glowing man, I am.

I am a growing, glowing man~

I agree only because my family are rednecks.

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And the optional Cylorians, some of which have questionable canon value but I leave that at your leisure.

>more options
>still 30 points
>no drawbacks

My $0.02, you should replace all tier costs with the final cost for that tier. The wings, for example, should have Tier 1 show 2 points, Tier 2 showing 5, and Tier 3 show 7. If you have to buy all the earlier tiers to get the later upgrades then there's no sense in doing an extra step, and it helps you balance costs at a glance too. Apparently needed, since the first line of notes says improved wings cost 8 points when they do not. Added bonus, that note immediately becomes irrelevant and can be deleted.

Separating a sixth sense for magic from the actual magic tree seems a bit weird. It's completely possible to be the strongest mage that's ever lived, and apparently have absolutely no feeling for what you're doing. Seems akin to giving super strength to one of those people with nerve damage that can't feel pain, heat, or anything else.

Unfortunately people are still going to make mistakes. If you use all-in-one cost then you are going to have people asking/assuming you have to buy the previous tiers. With prices as they are people might still assume the opposite, but the mechanics very much indicate that that would not be the case. Why would unlimited flight be purchasable by itself for the same cost as limited flight, and less cost than gliding? It's mechanically obvious the way it is, even if people might still screw it up somehow.

>I much prefer the "accidental encounter" setup rather than "my family is really wizards"
If my parents were descended from a bloodline of wizards i would not be surprised at this point.

Perhaps I should use a trip... I don't know, but this faggotry cannot stand . I would never stop using Zynthia as I said and anyone who thinks otherwise is a fucking fool.

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Still wants to use an intentionally annoying and garbage narrator.
Classic Tok! Doesn't understand what constructive criticism is!

Zynthia was fine for one CYOA. You've taken it way too far now.

Oh hey since you're here, do you mind if I change the name of my cyoa from Dragonborn to Halfdragon?
The cool font I found makes the word Halfdragon look much better.

love goddess cyoa where?

Ferrean does not own a trademark on the name Half Dragon, you can do what you want.

>If you use all-in-one cost then you are going to have people asking/assuming you have to buy the previous tiers.

With increasing costs for each tier, I'm doubtful of this. Especially with such a small point pool. It's your cyoa, you do what you want with it, I just see less mistakes being made overall if someone's adding together four numbers instead of twelve.

A further note on the size of the pool, the old cyoa had about 68 points worth of options to choose from, this has about 86. To maintain the same ratio of available points to total pool we'd have to have 38.

half dragon is not a single word user

I want to ask him to be nice.
Also pls stop posting that all the time.

>Get confused about who is making the halfdragon CYOA
>Turns out they are both making one
A surprise but a welcome one.

By the way Ferrean it says Cosemetics instead of Cosmetics

celestial bureaucracy?

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Thread seems mostly dead at this point... wonder what happened.

Oh well, I'll just post a few things I guess.

Yeah, they took like whole eras to finally begin to dismantle the world but i am glad they actually delivered.

Because it's 5 am in Americaland, on a Monday. Summer holidays ended.

Any chance of a kind user posting the imouto cyoa?

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Thanks man

Today is labor day. Plenty have the day off.

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Wtf would I know about American holidays?

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wasn't this faggot relegated to the lewd cyoa containment thread in /trash/? why is he back and shitting up the thread with his garbage?

>love goddess cyoa where?
After my secret project maybe, Zynthia is a good narrator and Waifu CYOAs are fun to make or I might go for a create your own mad scientist lewd lab CYOA narrated by Meridith Vickers. Still haven't decided what do do after the secret project. It's perhaps better that way, If I get too invested into something I lose focus on what I'm currently working on.

>Zynthia was fine for one CYOA. But two CYOAs are too far!
You have seen nothing yet, I vow to always use Zynthia as the narrator on all of my waifu CYOAs.

>Dominator

>Year 2k.X

>Technoform, Pillar of hope, Lord of Hosts

>Resurrect, Aeither passage

>Power generation: Knowledge

>Prophet: Leader

>Divine gifts: Immortality, demonic arms, Beauty

>Dominion: summoning sites

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Minions
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>Lesser: Form-Mammalian, Affinity-cyber/fire/earth, Skill-Speed/Divine focus

>Humaniond: Form-Mamallian, Affinity-cyber/fire/earth, Skill-Genius/armsmaster/smithing/hypersenses/attraction/speed

>Greater: Form-Great size, Affinity-Cyber/fire/earth, skill-Genius/toughness/speed/perpetual/hypersenses/Spawner/Get back up/Composit body/Terror

-----------------------------------------------------------------
Underworld
-----------------------------------------------------------------
>Judgement

>Mechanical, Forest, Halls of the gods,Realm guardians, Servants

And lo, the god of knowledge did grant his worshippers unnatural beauty and knowledge unending. But one must always ask: What is the price of knowledge?

Both are already written down, but thank you.
If you or anyone else find more mistakes, then let me know.

To be honest I liked the original premise much more myself, but as it turns out a lot of people are extremely attached to their homes. In the draft before this one, you actually met Joyce while waiting for the bus. It was dropped because a lot of players liked the feeling that she owed them something. As for the powers, the next patch will actually have balance testing.

Yeah, I could have defended myself if I put the note earlier. For now I have to agree with you on your first point. The magic power is dumb. It was always dumb. One day I'll replace it with an actual magic tree. One day.

I mean, I don't really care. You do have to keep in mind that there's 2 versions of this and 2 WIPs that have the same name, and people have already been confused by this. So while I think it's an incredibly stupid idea to name it halfdragon if you want your CYOA to stand out, I don't really care what you call it.

Can you please give your other CYOA with Zynthia?

>One day I'll replace it with an actual magic tree. One day
So one day you are going to take the already limited points and split the best bang for your buck option into a million different smaller options that still cost way too many points.

Forgive me if I'm not looking forward to that.

Zynthia is a whore

What's she charge?

Your sanity, clearly.

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I'm clearly getting the better end of this deal if she's the one that's got to find out where it ran off to.

user, if you don't have your sanity, how can you ever pay her? Whores aren't interested in things you don't have.

List of corrections was too long to keep in one post, so here's a pastebin: pastebin.com/LaPWEik3
...aaand I forgot to check the notes bit at the end before making it, so here's corrections for those:

--White note
lists the cost of Tier 3 wings incorrectly
--Blue note, 2nd-to-last line
"tandom" should be "tandem"
--Red note, last line
using "i.e." instead of "e.g."
--Orange note, 1st line
"Cosemetics" should be "Cosmetics"
"allow" should be "allows"
"independantly" should be "independently"

>posting the lesser version

So what you're saying is, I'd have to be crazy to even try?

I'm sure it's fine. It's like inheriting the title to a car from a relative with a lot of property. You've got the title, the car's yours, you've just got to find out where it's parked.

It's obviously going to be its own separate points pool you ham-fisted ninny.

That's brilliant. I'll look at the full thing in a couple hours. I'm going to bed now, before I start seeing the spiders crawl out of my mouth.

Ayy I'm not last on the strawpoll

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