Good day and welcome to Veeky Forums, the board where everything's made up and the experience points don't matter! That's right, the experience is sort of like your first job, meamingless in the long run.
Today we'll be playing a game called Scenes from a Hat: Veeky Forums Edition! We carefully collected suggestions from fellow elegan/tg/entlemen and randomized them in this hat. I'll select the scene suggestions at random and we'll see what kind of responses we get!
When natural 20s go wrong.
>I roll to knock on elegant glass door
>Hey—look at what I just rolled on my skill check!
Things you can say about the dwarf but not about your lover.
You are Fatter and shorter then last time
Odd posts to the adventurer's
board.
Help! Someone turned me into a sheet of paper and just skewered me to this board!
Nice beard
Watch out, they're heavier than they look.
Heroes NOT wanted, please avoid cave near Morrison farmstead.
That beard is cute! CUTE!
That Guy is at it again.
Need help clearing innkeepers from basement, reward 10g.
Local man seeking friend for a day
10g
No, you seem to not understand this, since I wrote Lawful Good on my sheet, then that means that torturing this baker is a lawful good action, and therefore he must be a cultist.
*rolls dice*
I roll to climb up the bar wenches butt.
>I cast fireball on the vampire.
The bard's last words.
Last words before the Paladin falls
"AAARGH!"
>No, you seem to not understand this, since I wrote Lawful Good on my sheet, then that means that torturing this baker is a lawful good action, and therefore he must be a cultist.
*rolls dice*
Wait a minute, I can't pull out!
I bet I can make this jump
>"When a Paladin does it, that means that it is not illegal."
Hold my beer.
Hold my beer.
Hold my beer.
Hold my beer.
Hold my beer.
Hold my beer.
"Aim for the bushes"
>So this class basically plays like a fighter, right?
Anyway here's Wonderwall
Best post
Nice.
God it's dark in here.
Those are some heavy stones.
Missing Paper. Please return to poster.
Just one more stroke...
Righteous. *Throws up horns*
I'm pretty sure armour doesn't affect ride checks.
Just double-checking, is it don't look at the gorgon or don't look at her face?
>rolls 1 on knowledge (architecture)
This bridge looks stable enough.
I'm gay.
"My hips are moving on their own!"
Don't stop me now
I'm having such a good time
I'm having a ball
Don't stop me now
If you wanna have a good time
Just give me a call
bump, shits gold
>rogue's pickup lines
>Sneak Attack isn't the only thing I do from behind, lady.
Nice chest
>I'll take everything that isn't nailed down
top meme
>I'll nail down everything that isn't taken
excellent work, party bard
You won't see me but you'll feel me
How 'bout I pick your lock
"Hey, I think you dropped these panties."
>things you don't want to find in a sleeping dragon's hoard
Yourself.
Speak for yourself. Dragons take excellent care of their belongings.
Good point.
>The rogue, and he's got a vuvuzela
The party bard.
Lesser known fantasy guilds.
>quadruple dubs
>4
The Legendary Pixel Crew
>55
>33
>44
>88
[doubles intensify]
Failed drafts to the BBEG's monologue.
First of all I wanted to thank my friends and family. Without you I would never get here.
First let me apologize for ruining the evening, because the heroes claim I ruin everything
Things you can say in game but not in real life.
I say we kill 'em
What's your anal circumference?
Thank you for being reasonable.